I fight to breathe as she turns and runs towards her car.
“Lauren,” I cry as her tyres kick up the stones covering the car park. But it’s too late.
She’s gone.
Chapter Thirteen
Once the sound of her engine disappears, I fall back down on the blanket. At some point over the last hour or so, night descended around us and the only light is coming from the moon that’s shining brightly above me.
I stare up at the star-filled sky as emotion clogs my throat and stings my eyes.
I tell myself that she didn’t mean any of those words. She can’t. I can see how she really feels when we’re together. It’s no different to our first few times all those years ago. I know it’s not just me who still feels the connection between us. Hell, she’s fucked me twice in the past week. There’s definitely still something between us. There has to be.
Lauren’s the only girl ever to own my heart, and I’m not letting her go because she’s too stubborn to admit what we could be. I know I hurt her. I feel the guilt and pain of that day every waking moment. She’s not the only one who had her heart broken.
The night chill eventually gets to me and I find myself back in my car. Rita’s still singing away, but even her voice doesn’t have the effect it usually does.
Not feeling strong enough to return to the house where so much has happened with Lauren, I head back to the office.
This time, all the lights are off and the place is deserted. I walk through the darkness until I’m in what was once my dad’s office. I flick the desk lamp on and power up the computer.
I’m determined to give this business the lease of life it needs to stop it from going under, and in order for that to happen I need to start getting my head around what’s going on.
I get so lost in everything that before I know it, the sun’s starting to come up and the sound of someone entering drags my eyes up from the screen.
“Have you been here all night?” Erica correctly guesses when she finds me probably looking a little worse for wear.
“Looks that way.”
“Are you okay? You seem…”
“I’m fine. Just trying to get my head around everything.”
“Did you find Lauren yesterday?” I make a noise in agreement and Erica’s eyebrow pops up in question. “I’ll go make coffee and you can tell me all about it.”
“Nothing to tell.” The pain I felt as she drove away from me last night once again tugs at my heart.
“Try telling your face that.”
I manage to distract Erica with a million work-related questions when she reappears thankfully with a steaming mug of coffee. I know she hasn’t forgotten though. I can see it in the sympathetic looks I get while she thinks I’m doing something else. I know she wants to help, but quite honestly, I’ve no idea if anyone can do anything to help right now. Lauren made her thoughts very clear last night. I now just need to decide what I’m going to do about it.
Once the others start arriving for the day, Erica leaves me to it. I need to go home and get some sleep really, but now I’ve started getting to grips with this place once again, I’m desperate to continue. This might be the only thing I have here now, so I’ve no choice but to make a success of it.
I’m looking over a set of drawings when someone knocks on the office door.
“Come in,” I call without looking up, because I assume it’s either Erica or Betty with more coffee.
“We need to talk,” an unfamiliar male voice says, dragging my eyes up from the desk.
“What the—” He might look like a different person from the first time I met him, but I know immediately that the man standing in front of me is Joe. The boyfriend. But this time, there’s no crisp white shirt, braces, or slicked-back hair. Instead, he’s wearing a skin-tight black t-shirt, tattoos on full display, and a Johnson & Son’s high visibility jacket. “You’ve got to be shitting me.”
Closing the door behind him, cutting off any prying eyes, he walks over to my desk and places his palms down. If he’s trying to intimidate me with his muscles and ink, it’s failing miserably.
My muscles twitch to stand toe-to-toe with him but I resist, not wanting to look like he affects me in any way. Instead, I rest back in my chair and plaster a neutral expression on my face.
“You need to stay away from her.”
“Not happening. Did you need anything else?” Fire flicks through his eyes and I just about manage to contain my smile. Going a round or two with this guy might be the exact thing I need to ease the tension coursing through me, but I want it to be a challenge. When I beat him, I want it to be known that it’s because I’m the better man.
“Do you have any idea what you’re doing to her?”
“I know exactly what I did to her last night,” I taunt. His jaw pops and the muscles in his neck tense. “Didn’t she tell you?”
“Of course she fucking told me. Lauren’s not a liar.” My eyes widen slightly at his admission. “I know everything, Ben. I know every bit of pain you’ve caused her. I also know that it’s time for you to disappear off to wherever it was you went before and to leave her the fuck alone.”
“Make me,” I state, deciding now’s the perfect time to properly get in his face. There’s about an inch between us when the door swings open and Lauren rushes in.
“For fuck’s sake.” She grabs Joe’s arm and attempts to pull him away. “I told you to leave it.”
“This needs fucking sorting, sweets.”
Sweets? Who the fuck does this guy think he is?
“Just get your arse to site like you promised you would.” Lauren’s anger is palpable, and it makes me weirdly happy to know that it’s not directed at me for once.
“If he so much as touches you again, I’ll fucking kill him,” Joe seethes.
“He won’t.” Lauren’s words seem a little too confident for my liking. I know for a fact that if I got her in the right situation, she’d be like putty in my hands once again. The spark between us is too strong for her to deny, and she knows it just as well as I do. It’s about time that this fucker realised it as well and got out of my fucking way.
“I’m serious,” he says, turning his dark stare on me. A weaker man might cower to him, but that’s not who I am. Standing taller, I tip my chin up to him. “You fucking touch her—”
“And you’ll kill me. Yeah, I got that memo thanks. Are we done here? I’ve got a business to run, and I’m sure you’ve got some bricks to move or something.”
“Actually, Joe’s one of our site agents,” Lauren says. “You might want to start being nice to him.”
“Get out of my office,” I growl. I’ve not had enough sleep or caffeine to deal with this right now.
“I’m fucking watching you,” Joe warns.
“I’m real scared,” I mutter as he turns and walks away. I don’t see his reaction because my eyes are locked on Lauren as she tries to contain a smile.
“You need to start fighting your own battles, baby. You don’t need a henchman to do it for you.”
“You and I both know what happens when we fight. I think it’s best we stay out of each other’s way. I’ll be working from home if anyone needs me.” Spinning on her heel, she walks out of the office and, after a very brief chat with Erica, she leaves the building.
“You slept with her again, didn’t you?”
“Sorry, I’m working,” I say over my shoulder, feeling Erica’s eyes burning into the back of my head.
“You need to stop playing games, Ben.”
Spinning on my chair, I find her with her hands on her hips, staring daggers at me.
“What?”
“Lauren’s one of my best friends, and you’re hurting her. You need to stop.”
“I thought I was your friend?”
“You are. But you’re the one doing all of this. Just do as she asks and leave her be. She’s moved on with her life, and you need to do the same.”
“You’re serious?”
“We’re meant to be together.”
“Maybe so, but not right now. Just give her some time. Give her some space to breathe.”
“So he can get his claws in even deeper?”
“Just trust her, Ben. Trust that she knows what she’s doing.”
“How can I when she’s been sleeping with me?”
Erica eventually leaves the office, but I only get a few minutes of peace before four others descend on me.
“Here he is!” Dec announces as he swings the door open. “Shit, you look rough, mate.”
“Nice to see you, too.”
“We’ve been waiting at the house for you. We need to head back home.”
Guilt washes through me that I’ve basically abandoned them after they came all this way to try to cheer me up. “Shit, guys. I’m—”
“Don’t even think about it. We came here to support you, not to make you feel guilty for doing your thing,” Liv says, giving me a stern look.
I smile at her, but I don’t feel any better about any of this. “This place is about to go under, and my darling stepdaddy left it all to me.”
“Yeah, your mum mentioned something along those lines. Is there anything we can do?” Dec asks.
“Got a few hundred grand to spare?” Dec looks a little too serious. “I’m joking, I’m joking. I’m sure it’ll all be fine once I get back into the swing of it.”
“Well, you know where we are if there is anything.”
“I hate leaving you like this,” Liv whispers in my ear when I pull her in for a hug.
“I’ll be fine. You don’t need to worry about me.”
“Keep me informed about everything.”
“I will.”
Saying goodbye to the people who’ve basically been my family for the past few years is more emotional than I expected it to be. When I left Devon, I wasn’t expecting my life there to come to an end, but looking at how things have turned out here, it seems that might just be the case.
Walking back into the office once they’ve left, I’m met with a sea of concerned faces, and it reminds me that I haven’t slept.
“Are you going to be okay holding the fort?” I ask Erica when I come to a stop by her desk.
“Of course. Who do you think’s been running this place for the last two weeks?”
“I’ll never be able to thank you enough.”
“Ben, I caused half of this. It’s my job to try to help put it right. I’m just grateful I still have a job.”
“Don’t be stupid. You’re not going anywhere. Call if you need me, but there’s a good chance I’ll be sleeping.”
“I’ve got it covered. Go look after yourself.”
Laughter fills the house when I get home. Poking my head into the living room, I find Mum and Chris laughing at something on the TV. I can’t help but smile at them both. Maybe what everyone has been saying is true, and things will all be okay in the end. An image of Lauren pops into my head, but I push it to the back of my mind—for now, at least. I just need to be happy that Mum’s able to move past the disaster that was her late husband and the legacy he’s left behind.
Memories of my time with Lauren last night fill my mind as I shower. The scent of her perfume has lingered around me since the moment she left. I’m not all that happy about washing it away.
My body’s just about ready to crash when I drag my feet towards my bed. Crawling under the covers, I fall asleep the second my head hits the pillow.
Chapter Fourteen
I wake with a start and one thought running through my mind.
Joe knows we slept together, yet he didn’t take my head off.
I don’t stop to question my decision. Instead, I jump out of bed and drag on some fresh clothes.
“Ben?” Mum calls from the kitchen as I race towards the front door. “Is everything okay?
“Yeah. What’s Lauren’s address?”
“I can’t…I promised…”
“Don’t worry. I’ll find it.”
“What are you doing?”
“Going to claim what’s mine.” Pride fills her face, but I don’t miss the slight concern that’s also present. It makes my determination to get this sorted right now falter slightly.
“Are you sure this is a good idea? She’s already been through so much.”
“I need her, Mum. I can’t sit around and watch her with someone else when she’s shown that she needs me too.”
“You just need to give her time, Ben. She’ll figure it all out when she’s ready. You pushing her into it isn’t going to help.”
That doubt niggles at me again, but my need for her is stronger. “I can’t stand by and watch her make a huge mistake with him. I won’t do it. Wish me luck,” I say, reaching for the door handle and pulling it open.
“Good luck,” she calls out, but I’m already getting in my car.
The drive to the office takes longer than I think it ever has before, but the second I pull up, I race through to my office and power up the computer. Finding the folder full of all our employees’ personal details, I find Lauren’s and note down her address.
I don’t bother taking the time to shut it back down again. I’m too intent on finding her and sorting this out once and for all.
She lives farther out of the city than I was expecting. I manage to get stuck at every set of traffic lights on the way, but before long, I’m jogging up the stairs towards the flat listed as hers and Joe’s after a young mum with a little boy helpfully held the main door open for me.
Knocking on the door, I hear movement inside the flat. My heart thunders in my chest as I impatiently wait for it to open.
Finally, there’s a click, and a slither of light from inside shines around the wooden door. But when it’s pulled back enough to see the person at the other side, what I find isn’t what I was expecting. Lauren’s standing there, and her hair’s a mess, sticking up in all directions. She’s just wearing a man’s t-shirt.
Her eyes harden as she watches me take in her appearance. “What are you doing here?” She’s slightly out of breath, and it only ignites my anger.
“Who is it, sweets?” a male voice rumbles, before the door opens even wider to reveal Joe coming to a stop behind her in just his boxers. “Oh, it’s you,” he spits, sliding his arm around Lauren’s waist and pulling her to him before dropping his lips to her exposed neck.
Something inside me explodes. My nostrils flare and my teeth grind as I try to keep myself from ripping his fucking limbs from his body.
“Did you want something?” he asks while Lauren stands stock still in his arms.
“I came for what’s mine.”
“Nothing here is yours, mate.”
“Don’t fucking ma—”
“He’s right,” Lauren says. Her eyes find mine, and I see a determination in them that wasn’t there moments ago. “There’s nothing here for you anymore.”
“But—”
“There are no buts, Ben. I told you last night. I’m done. This is over. Stay if you want, for your business, but I won’t be there. You’ll find my resignation in your Inbox already. I. Am. Done.”
“I’m proud of you, sweets,” Joe whispers in her ear, holding her tight.
A lump the size of a fucking basketball climbs up my throat. I have no choice but to turn and walk away. I’d give everything to Lauren, but she won’t see my tears.
Ben and Lauren’s story concludes in Fighting for the Forbidden. PRE-ORDER NOW
* * *
If you’re enjoying Lauren and Ben’s story then you’ll love my military romance Never Forget Him. Download the first in the trilogy now.
Acknowledgments
Writing this part of Lauren and Ben’s story just about broke me. It was hard going and so incredibly emotional, but the heartache had to happen.
I’m not desperate to dive straight into the third a
nd final part of their story to attempt to soothe their broken hearts and to find out a little more about what happened in the long six years they were apart. But don’t worry, I’m not going to make it easy for them. There’s still plenty of anger and betrayal to come.
Once again, I need to say a HUGE thank you to my alpha reader, Michelle. You’ve been there with me word for word, egging me on and listening to me talk myself in circles over how all of this was going to play out. Oh, and of course you were the one who demanded that I break Ben and make him cry. I hope you’re happy with yourself!
My beta team, Deanna, Helen, Lindsay, Suzanne and Tracy. Thank you so much for dropping everything to find out more about Lauren and Ben, and for now being too mean when I left you hanging once again with no date for a follow up. Your feedback as always is priceless and all your words and theories are still spinning in my mind as I plan book three.
Evelyn, once again thank you so much for working your magic and making my words as pretty as they can be. I seriously couldn’t do this without you.
And as always, last but never least, my husband and daughter for supporting me and allowing me to follow this crazy dream.
Until next time,
Tracy xo
About the Author
Tracy Lorraine is a M/F and M/M contemporary romance author. Tracy has just turned thirty and lives in a cute Cotswold village in England with her husband, baby girl and lovable but slightly crazy dog. Having always been a bookaholic with her head stuck in her Kindle, Tracy decided to try her hand at a story idea she dreamt up and hasn’t looked back since.
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Losing the Forbidden: Forbidden Series #2 Page 11
