Janie laughed. “Surely you know better than to ask that by now.” Her laugh made him feel a little foolish, but the smile in her eyes told him he shouldn’t take her too seriously.
“Ryan has been begging for Sam to come over, and we all want to see the baby goats, so this is perfect.”
The picture in his hands felt especially heavy. This would give him a chance to talk to RaeLynn.
“All right, then, sounds like a plan,” he said.
Janie gathered the kids, and they went outside to where a ranch van was parked. They’d used it a couple of times when going on group outings with all the children. After they got the kids all secured, Janie drove off, leaving Hunter to stare at the picture he’d promised to give RaeLynn.
He walked over to her cabin. RaeLynn and her mom were sitting at the table, drinking coffee and eating some muffins.
“You should join us,” her mom offered. Hunter glanced at the paper in his hands, then at RaeLynn. “I’m afraid I can’t stay. But I wanted to give RaeLynn a picture that Lynzee drew her.”
He’d hoped to talk to her alone, but he wasn’t sure how to orchestrate that without making Luanne think there was more to the situation. He’d noticed the way she, along with Wanda and the others, were always trying to push him and RaeLynn together. It was a nice sentiment, but they’d seemed to forget that hearts were at stake.
“No, sit. I insist. You and RaeLynn have barely had a chance to talk lately, and I’m about to head out anyway. I want to go tell Ricky the good news.”
Hunter turned his gaze to her. “What good news?”
Luanne grinned, suddenly looking a lot like RaeLynn. “Ricky bought and kept my family’s old ranch, and he’s giving it to me. He also offered me a job as the office manager for the guest ranch, and I’ve decided to accept. I’ve missed this life. I needed to get away from it to realize how much it meant to me. I was so caught up in my pain over everything that happened with Cinco that I forgot all the things I loved about being here.”
Hunter knew the old Anderson ranch well. He’d often go over to take care of things there. It was a bit far from the main Double R buildings, but Hunter had thought it could be used for private parties or storing Double R equipment. Ricky had always staunchly refused, though, saying he wanted to preserve its legacy. Now Hunter understood why.
“That’s great,” he said. “I think we’ve done a pretty good job of keeping things up, but if there’s anything you see that needs to be done, please let me know.”
He looked over at RaeLynn. “What does this mean for you?” he asked. He wanted to say this was another reason for her to stay. Of course, he’d love it if she stayed because she wanted to be with him and the kids, but if she came to visit her mom often, it might be good for him as well.
No, that was probably a silly thought. He couldn’t hang in limbo, hoping that she would eventually come around. It was ironic that he was here to reinforce the idea of keeping their distance, and now he was suddenly wondering whether there was the possibility of something more.
“It gives me more reason to spend time in Columbine Springs,” RaeLynn said. Then she looked over at her mom, an unreadable expression on her face. “I still need to figure out how I’m going to make everything work, but I’ll admit that the closer I get to leaving, the less I want to.”
Her mother gave a slight nod, and while Hunter wondered what that was about, the bigger question in his mind and his heart was if he was possibly responsible for her feeling that way.
“I need to get going,” Luanne said. “I’ll see you all at dinner.”
RaeLynn gestured to one of the kitchen chairs. “Please sit, Hunter. Even if it’s just for a moment.”
While he needed to get to work, he was too curious about what RaeLynn’s plans were.
As he sat, she got up and poured him a cup of coffee. “Here. You’re always so rushed in the morning, you probably haven’t had a chance to just sit and enjoy your coffee for a while.”
When she sat back down, she looked nervous, so he smiled at her. He handed her the picture Lynzee had drawn her. “I actually came by to drop this off for you,” he said.
RaeLynn looked at the picture and smiled. “I’m sorry if it made things uncomfortable for you.”
Hunter shook his head. “So what do we do?”
“I don’t know,” she said. “Part of me says that there’s obviously something here, and it’s foolish not to give it a chance. But the other part of me looks at what I would be giving up, and I don’t ever want to resent anyone for it. So I don’t know where that leaves us. My mom thinks I should give us a try.”
She sounded so uncertain, and he didn’t want to push her. Her fear of regret was the exact reason why he didn’t want to make her stay. He’d already done that once, and he still couldn’t let go of the guilt.
“You know I’ll support you whatever you do,” he said. “I’m not going to force you to make a decision you will regret later. This has to be your decision.”
“What if I try, and I realize I can’t do it? What if I miss my old life too much, and I choose to go back? I think about all the hearts that will be broken.”
The fear in her voice made him want to take her into his arms and tell her it was going to be okay.
“What if you stay, and despite our best efforts, we can’t make it work? I mean, there are no guarantees. That’s the risk in all relationships. And it’s up to you to decide whether or not you’re willing to take it.”
As he spoke, he realized that fear of the unknown had been holding him back. And if he was going to have something last with her, or anyone else, he had to be willing to take that risk.
“I’m willing to take that chance with you,” he said. “Yes, there is a lot at stake. But I have to believe that because we both understand how high the stakes are, we’ll be willing to do the work for everyone’s sake.”
RaeLynn nodded slowly. “You’re right. And I think that’s kind of what my mom was trying to tell me last night when we were talking about it. I’ve seen all the ways relationships can go wrong, and how kids get caught in the middle. It’s made me afraid to open myself up. Never taking a risk means never getting hurt, but it also means never falling in love.”
She gave him a small smile. “All right, then. I’m willing to give it a try.”
Chapter Ten
Things slowly got back to normal at the Double R. Hunter started sitting next to her again at meals, and the camaraderie they’d shared had returned. Secretly, RaeLynn hoped for some alone time with him so they could maybe sneak another kiss in. But that would have to wait, because right now, Hunter was taking them on a family hike.
He had Bella in a carrier on his front, and they’d wrangled the little ones into staying on track. It wasn’t a difficult hike, and it felt good to get out with the kids and stretch their legs. RaeLynn’s backpack had the makings of a picnic lunch that they could enjoy at the lake.
Hunter had paused to point out an eagle flying, and RaeLynn smiled at how enraptured the kids were as he explained about the bird. She caught up to him and stood beside him.
“It’s amazing how much you know about everything around here,” she said.
“That’s because he’s supersmart,” Lynzee piped up. “I have the smartest daddy in the whole wide world.”
RaeLynn laughed, but then she noticed that Phoebe looked sad.
“What’s wrong?” RaeLynn asked.
Phoebe kicked a rock. “I don’t have a dad, just an uncle daddy, and I don’t think that’s the same.”
It wasn’t the same, and RaeLynn knew the pain of being a little girl without a dad. Hers had been dead, but from what RaeLynn had heard about Phoebe’s dad, he might as well be. As part of the social-services investigation, they’d talked to him, and he’d signed over all parental rights. He didn’t want to be a part of his daughter’s life. His loss, but that d
idn’t help the little girl hurting in front of her.
RaeLynn squatted so she was eye to eye with Phoebe. “Not everyone has a dad. At least not in the same way. And that’s okay. Cinco was my dad, but he died before I was born. My mom tried to give me other dads, but that didn’t work out. Lynzee has a dad, but not a mom. Our families all look different, and that’s okay. The important thing is that you have lots of people around who love you.”
She wanted to say more, but there was only so much a preschooler could understand. Hopefully, Phoebe would feel just how much she was loved.
She pulled the little girl into her arms. “No matter what happens, I’ll always be your family.”
Phoebe hugged her tightly, and it felt so good, until Tucker came over and jabbed her with a stick.
“Tucker! We don’t poke people with sticks.”
Tucker glared at her, obviously feeling left out. She held out an arm to him, and he came over and she gave them both a tight squeeze.
Lynzee put her hands on her hips. “What about me?”
RaeLynn loosened her hold on the other two and stretched out her other arm for Lynzee to join them. “Well, come on. There is enough room for you, too. And yes, I will also always be your family.”
She hugged the three children, well aware of Hunter’s gaze on her. What she wanted to say but couldn’t in front of the children, was that even if things didn’t work out between them, she wasn’t going to renege on her commitment to the kids.
She gave them one final squeeze and stood. “Okay. We still have some hiking to do, and I’m getting hungry. We’re almost at the lake, so let’s get moving.”
The three children ran ahead, and Hunter hung back with her. “Thank you for that,” he said. “She’s been acting weird lately about the whole daddy thing. I think having it in her face all the time that there’s a difference between an uncle and a daddy has been hard for her. You explained it well.”
She reached out and gave him a small side hug. “I can relate to how she feels, having so many father figures who weren’t my dad growing up. As long as Phoebe knows she’s loved, eventually that difference isn’t going to matter to her. So just keep emphasizing how much you care for her. That’s all she needs.”
Hunter squeezed back, and his warmth filled her heart. He was so open, so willing to work on things. Hunter was always willing to talk and compromise, and that was maybe one more area where she needed to learn to trust and grow.
Fortunately, they were on a straight part of the path, and the children hadn’t gotten out of sight, but they had to move swiftly to catch up. The hugs had rejuvenated the kids, or maybe it was the promise of lunch. Just as they got to the lake, two of the ranch hands pulled up on an ATV.
“I know this is your day off, but you said to let you know immediately if something happens with that east fence again. You’re out of cell-phone range, but we knew you were coming here. Sorry for interrupting.”
Hunter looked sheepishly at RaeLynn, so before he could apologize, she said, “Go. I know what a nuisance this situation has been.”
He’d taken Bella out of the carrier and set her on a blanket when they first arrived, so all he needed to do was take the carrier off. “I know you’ve worn this before, but do you need any help with adjusting it before I go?”
RaeLynn shook her head. “No. You go and take care of everything, and I’ll see you later tonight.”
“You want me to send someone to come help you get back?”
Poor guy must feel really bad about leaving, but she understood about work. “The trail is easy and clear. We’ll be fine. Go. The sooner you leave, the sooner you can make it back.”
He smiled at her in a funny way that made her stomach jump. He was such a good man, and she looked forward to spending more time together in the evening.
Hunter climbed into one of the two empty seats on the ATV, and the men left. RaeLynn and the children continued to enjoy the picnic. All seemed to be going well, until Tucker dropped his sandwich in the dirt. The earsplitting wail made her cringe.
“It’s okay, Tucker. We can get a new sandwich.”
“My sammich,” he wailed. He’d started speaking more since coming to Hunter’s, but it was only because RaeLynn had spent so much time with him that she could understand what he said.
RaeLynn picked it up, but it was so covered in dirt that she didn’t want him eating it.
“How about a bite of mine?” she asked. “It’s exactly the same.”
“No! Miiine,” Tucker wailed again.
One did not reason with a two-year-old in the throes of a tantrum. Actually, she wasn’t sure one could reason with a two-year-old.
While Tucker threw himself to the ground and wailed over his lack of sandwich, RaeLynn helped the others clean up their picnic to head back. By the time they’d finished, he’d calmed down enough to get him to walk with them, but she could tell his mood had not picked up.
The entire trip down the mountain was punctuated with Tucker throwing a fit over every minor infraction. He’d obviously not taken a very good nap today, and dealing with him while trying to carry Bella and keep the two little girls occupied was wearing thin on her nerves.
She knew this was all part and parcel of having children. But it was hard to keep the children corralled and maintain her sanity long enough to get home. About halfway down the trail, Phoebe stumbled and scraped her knee. RaeLynn stopped and got out the first aid kit, but bandaging the little girl’s knee and giving her a quick snuggle didn’t stop the tears. In fact, it somehow prompted another meltdown from Tucker.
RaeLynn pulled out her phone. She’d been trying to do this on her own and had thought it wouldn’t be a big deal, but she was obviously outmatched by the cranky children. Unfortunately, she had no signal. Though the ranch had done a good job of trying to get as much cell coverage as they could in the area, especially areas frequented by their guests, part of the beauty of coming to the ranch was unplugging and getting away from it all.
She was more than ready to call the cavalry and have someone come pick them up in an ATV, but it wasn’t possible. She should have taken Hunter up on his offer to send someone for them, but she’d stupidly thought she could handle it herself. Eventually, she’d look back on this and laugh, but not today. As she repacked her backpack and tried to get Bella back in the baby carrier, the baby also started to wail.
RaeLynn closed her eyes and said a quick prayer. Please, God, get us through this.
She gave Bella a couple of soothing pats, bouncing her as best she could in the carrier in a way that usually helped get her to sleep. She’d just changed the baby before leaving the lake, and she’d had a full bottle, so Bella was probably just picking up on everybody else’s cranky energy.
They continued down the trail with Bella screaming in the carrier, and RaeLynn holding hands with the two upset children. Lynzee looked a bit put out, but at least she hadn’t complained or started crying. Maybe the little girl understood that RaeLynn was truly at the end of her rope.
When they finally got to the trailhead, RaeLynn almost wept with relief. Just a few minutes more, and they’d be back at Hunter’s cabin. Bella used that exact moment to spit up all over RaeLynn. At least she hadn’t done it earlier. RaeLynn could live with a massive amount of baby spit-up all over her for a few minutes longer.
Knowing she was within cell range now, she pulled out her phone and saw two missed calls from her boss, Gerald. As much as she’d like to return them immediately to find out what was going on, work would have to wait.
She quickly dialed her mom and explained what was going on. Her mom promised to meet her at Hunter’s with a change of clothes.
By the time she changed and got everyone settled, it was well past seven o’clock. There’d been no word from Hunter. She pulled out her phone to call him to see what was going on, but it went straight to voice mai
l. That was when she remembered about the missed calls from Gerald. He hadn’t left a message, so she dialed his number and got voice mail. She left a message, apologizing for not getting back to him sooner, saying she hoped it was nothing urgent regarding the sale.
The kids were all exhausted from their outing, so after a quick supper, she put everyone to bed early with no complaints. If they woke up too early in the morning for Hunter, he could deal with it. She’d forgotten how difficult it was raising children. Then again, she’d never had four little ones at the same time like this. She was so exhausted that she wasn’t sure how parents did it every single day.
She pulled out her phone and tried calling Hunter again. It went directly to voice mail again. She didn’t want to unload about how bad the day had gone after he left, so instead she asked him for an update. She knew this was life on the ranch. Things took longer than expected, just like that night with the colicky horse. She turned on the TV to take her mind off things but quickly fell asleep.
Sometime in the middle of the night, Bella woke needing a bottle. RaeLynn took care of that while half asleep. When she woke again, it was morning, and the stillness in the house told her that the children were still asleep. Yesterday must’ve been just as exhausting for the kids as it had been for her. She stretched and then glanced at her phone. Nothing from Hunter. Part of her was upset that he’d been so inconsiderate as to leave her with the kids all night without word. This was just like all the times she’d tried to help her siblings with something small, only for it to turn into some extended thing. While logically she knew that Hunter wasn’t like that, it still hurt.
She scrolled through her phone contacts, wondering who to ask for an update. She hated to bother Ricky, but anyone else she called would probably just call him, so she went ahead and tapped his number.
“Have you seen Hunter?” she asked. “When we were on our hike yesterday, a ranch hand came to get him, saying there was a problem with the east fence. He’s been gone all night without word. I’m here with the kids, and I’m a little concerned that he hasn’t called to check in.”
Her Hidden Legacy Page 13
