by Gillian Zane
Babysitter and now housekeeper. My life kept improving.
SEVEN | Complicated Sucks
We rolled up on the compound like an invading army. Ito and Jimmy’s trip was longer and over water, so it was just us rolling in. We still got treated with a crowd running out to greet us and applause as we entered the compound.
We were rendezvousing with the troopers and the dregs of the National Guard tomorrow and we would roll into Lakeview that night. So, all we had to do was load up and get some rest.
Blake and Zach wanted to leave some fighters back at the compound, in case something happened while we were gone, but most of us were heading to Lakeview.
“I’m assuming we’re leaving Peters on the island,” I said to Zach as we walked into the main building of our compound. Cole Peters was another MJ grunt, but he was the only one that had kids and a wife at the compound. He was a good fighter, but his wife Grace liked him to stay close to home. I didn’t blame her. If I was her, I would want my husband staying home and protecting me and the kids too.
“Right. Peters, Hank Voiter, Justin Crisps, Ray, Orlando and Liam are all staying back. They’re all a good shot, but if something happens, it’ll be bad. I don’t want to think about that possibility. Most of the women are staying back. I only have Alexis, Melinda, you and Lani in the mix to go to Lakeview. Barbara Voiter and Madison have been training on and off with Kirk, which will leave the compound with eight guns, nine if you count Bubba, guarding nine children and two non-combat adults. We have to make this Lakeview mission quick, I don't feel comfortable with those odds.”
“You’re leaving Clara here?” I had done the math. The two non-combat adults were Clara and Patricia. The useless females in our group. Clara was kept locked in the infirmary because she had tried to kill Alexis. Didn’t want a repeat of that situation. And Patricia was a self-declared pacifist, which meant she didn’t even help fish. Useless.
“Yeah, she stays locked up. We’re going to move her after we take Lakeview,” Blake said, his face hard and unreadable.
I didn’t like the drama that revolved around Blake, Zach and Alexis. I got that they were happy, that they had found their thing. But to me it was a little too much. I despised drama of any kind.
Relationships meant drama. Their trio had it in spades since more people in the mix meant more issues. I didn’t quite get their dynamic. I didn’t think Blake and Zach were together, I never got that vibe from them. It was all about Lex. More power to her. I might not understand having a relationship with two men at once, but it was jealousy inducing. Having two hot guys fawn all over you, a girl could only wish. I couldn’t handle it in real life, but it made for a nice fantasy. I can’t even handle one. Even one was too much drama for me.
Then you add Clara to the mix and I think that’s where I want to call and all-stop.
Clara, the one locked in the infirmary, had tried to kill Lex. Clara, Blake’s ex-wife. Crazy ex-wife. The kind of ex-wife you would describe as manipulative, obsessive– homicidal. Nuttier than my Aunt Cookie, who’s a paranoid schizophrenic, so that’s saying a lot.
Clara had done everything in her power to get Blake back, which is where all the drama had come in. She had even faked a pregnancy, talked her way into making him rescue her in Texas and leaving Alexis and Zach behind. Then, when he brought her back here, with a few other survivors in tow, she had the audacity to try and kill Alexis because she didn’t like the competition.
She thought if Lex was out of the picture she would be Blake’s number one again. Love makes people do stupid shit. It didn’t win over Blake, it had the opposite effect, Blake was devastated and hadn’t been the same since.
The whole situation is FUBAR and poor Blake was caught in the middle. Yeah, it was partly his fault, and he got Lex back and they’re all loved up in their happy trio, but now he has to figure out what to do with Clara. She might be batshit, but she’s also his ex and I’m sure he loved her at some point. He’s got his ex locked in an infirmary right now. You can tell it’s bugging the crap out of him.
“And then what do you plan on doing with her?” I asked curious. Personally, I thought she should be taken out and shot, it would solve a lot of problems, but I was in the minority.
“Poche and Ryan want to set up a court system once we get things settled in Lakeview. We’ll have prisoners from the siege. Hopefully most of them will surrender without a fight. Each one will be tried, Poche and Ryan plan to sit on the court along with a representative from our group, maybe one grunt and one civilian.”
“Wow, that’s like civilized and shit,” I coughed, thinking it was a waste of time. These were lowlifes that were holding women prisoner and raping them on demand. There was no question to their guilt or innocence, all of them should be taken out. “So, what, y’all vote guilty or innocent? What happens if you vote guilty?”
“Firing squad,” Blake said simply.
“And innocent?” He shrugged.
“What if it’s a tie, if you have four on the panel, that could lead to some debate?” I asked.
“I think it should be five at the least, to avoid that,” he sighed. I could tell he wasn’t too won over by this idea either.
“If you have two military and one police representative, you should probably have two civilian representatives to even it out. One male and one female. That seems logical.”
“Logical is good, right?” He laughed.
“Logic is telling me to firebomb those shitholes and call it a wash.”
“They have about fifteen kids in there, not to mention the innocent women and men that they have doing their labor for them. It’s always a lot more complicated than we want it to be,” he said.
I looked at Blake. He had changed a lot since Lex had been kidnapped. It wasn’t just his new high and tight. He was always the more laid back of my bosses, quick to smile and dish out a joke or break out a bottle of liquor. But now the smiles were few and far between. I only saw him smile when Lex was near. When they were apart, the worry was evident in everything he did. I knew he loved her, but if this was what love did to you, stressed you out and had you all worried when they weren’t near, count me out.
I worried about my fellow survivors, but I liked putting me as number one on the list. It was hard enough keeping myself alive. It would blow being constantly worried about someone else.
“Complicated sucks,” I mumbled.
“We’ll figure it out,” Blake said assuredly, finally a hint of a smile playing on his lips as he looked at me.
“We get to start again. We’ve got to do it right. Let’s round up everyone and get packed up. Only a few more hours until we fall out,” he said in his stern, boss voice.
“I hope it’s worth it,” I whispered as he walked away from me down the hall. It was hard finding meaning in this new life. It was harder to think that one day our struggles might end and we might go back to worrying about trivial things.
I was pretty sure I wouldn’t live to see that day. Lifespans were considerably limited in this new world. I was destined to catch up to Martinez sooner rather than later. Lucas Martinez was the last MJ grunt we lost to the Z. He bit it when we were trying to rescue Lex from Lakeview. He had only died a few weeks ago, it still hurt to think about it. I knew that sooner, rather than later, that would be me.
Maybe in a few decades the dead will rot away and the remaining humanity can pick up the pieces. Start over again. It would be nothing like the world we left behind, though. I could pretty much guarantee that. That world was long gone.
EIGHT | Pretty Words with No Meaning
I fell into a routine. The children didn’t need much. They were well-behaved, forced into obedience because of their dreary existence. There were plenty of toys. They had the pick of everything that was scavenged from the drug store on the corner. Most of the time they were content to play quietly, only getting excited when one of the women or civilian men were brought in. They would jump to their feet when the door creaked ope
n. Each one hoping it was their mother or father. Their faces would pinch up in eager anticipation, not wanting to look happy, but not able to hide their hope.
When they would spot their parent, the lucky child would break into tears or a shout and rush to the adult. The others would wipe at their faces and sit back down, going back to their game or activity. It was heart-breaking.
Most of my time was spent idle. I distracted myself by using the punching bag that was bolted into the floor and ceiling. They hadn’t been able to remove it, so it worked in my favor. I also spent a lot of time playing cards. The older kids, two boys and one girl, got over their initial shyness and started hovering around me, so I taught them a few games and they quickly kicked my butt.
When we got tired of cards, I started teaching them a few self-defense tactics using the bag and the open floor. They were eager and willing to fight, even the girl. They knew their survival meant being able to defend themselves. We had to keep it a secret, though, I would have gotten us all in trouble if someone found out about our lessons.
The girl was named Felicity. She was a pretty little thing, but underweight, which I had to admit was a good thing. She was fourteen and on the verge of womanhood. Being underweight kept her curves hidden from the brothers. It wasn’t good to be a woman in this place.
The boys were Nick and Pete, twelve and fifteen respectively, both small and immature in their behavior but grave at the same time. They were good company, if a bit on the quiet side. We were playing a game of poker when the back door opened and one of the civilian men came in with the day’s rations. I stood and motioned for the teens to continue without me.
Eagle escorted the man inside and walked up to me, his eyes glancing behind my back and lingering on the teens. I stepped in front of him, not liking the way his lips curved into a smirk when he made eye contact with me. He was here to check in on me.
“How ya doing, man?” he asked with insincerity.
“Bored,” I said.
“Yeah, shit detail, didn’t know what else to do with you. You gotta shoot straight or this is where you’ll stay,” he said and grinned. He liked that I was here. He was a cruel one. I didn’t know who was worse, him or Junior.
“I don’t know what else I could have done, Eagle. I didn’t help those chicks get out and I never did anything but protect this place, same thing I’m doing now.” I shook my head.
“Don’t play stupid with me, Rebel. You always think you’re so smart, trying to get one over on all of us. Junior and me, though– we got your number. We know your heart ain’t with the Clan. We can see it every time you talk, every move you make. Until we know you put the Clan first, above all else, you’re not gonna be trusted. You’re lucky he didn’t strip ya, I would’ve.”
“I do put the Clan first,” I lied.
“See, I don’t believe you,” he shrugged. “It’s like when I used to tell bitches I loved them just to bag them, pretty words, nothing behind it.”
“Well, I don’t know what you want from me, Eagle. Just tell me what Junior wants and I’ll handle it. I’m here, aren’t I? How else can I prove it?”
“Like you handled that beating? Or how you handled that back-up before the biters took over?” He brought up something from our teen years, when I was asked to run back-up for a drug deal with another club. I had refused. I had gotten my college acceptance papers and I didn’t want to risk my future. They had discussed stripping me then, but my father had intervened with the argument that the club did need college graduates. He told them I was going to be a lawyer so I could handle their legal issues. They beat me anyway. Bad. I was lucky I finished high school. I spent the remainder of my senior year in the hospital.
I had nothing to say to Eagle and he nodded in understanding. Refusing your brothers was akin to being a traitor. There was no grey with this group, only black and white.
“Like I was saying, you don’t put the Clan first, you look out for one thing, and that’s your pretty little ass,” he laughed and slapped me hard on the back, putting a bit more force into it than he needed to.
“Speaking of pretty little asses, that one looks like she should be in the rotation,” he said and pointed to Felicity. My stomach sank.
“She’s too young. Senior said none under seventeen,” I stated firmly. “She’s only twelve,” I lied again.
“She’s don’t look twelve,” he leered. “Maybe I’ll make Junior change the rule.”
“They got plenty of experienced women in the back, Eagle. Why you want one that’ll lay there and cry?” I tried to sound reasonable.
“Yeah, you’re right.” He looked over my shoulder again and I cringed.
“Really, let me know if there is anything I can do. I’m not as selfish as you guys think,” I said changing the subject.
“Sure.” He cocked his head and looked at me again, probably trying to get a read on whether I was serious. Satisfied, he grunted and turned and left, motioning for the civilian to follow him out.
As soon as the door closed, I went to find a pair of scissors.
NINE | Fuck Yeah
We had an early morning reveille at four a.m. No bugle. We were treated to Zach screaming at the top of his lungs, “Fall out, assholes!”
I was used to early morning drills, so I was down and dressed in minutes. I stood by Zach’s side and urged everyone on, donning my drill sergeant persona. It was growing on me.
“Y’all suck,” Alexis said as she walked past us, a large pack on her back and an M4 in front of her.
“You look fucking sexy with that rifle,” Zach said and grabbed her, planting a kiss on her roughly.
“Get a room,” I grumbled and avoided the two of them as they got into the kiss. I tried not to stare, but a little part of me wished I was in Lex’s place, a guy fawning all over me and wanting me desperately.
The part of me that I liked to mock and throw stuff at.
“Meet ya in the truck,” Zach ended the kiss and swatted her on the ass. She turned and rushed down the hallway and out into the yard with a haughty smirk thrown my way. She knew PDA bothered me.
“You’re like a horny teenager. I’ve lost all respect for you, just so you know,” I said as we walked into the chilly morning.
“Jealousy doesn’t suit you, Baby.”
“Fuck you, boss," I flipped him off.
The three SCTVs were idling in the yard, waiting for their drivers. Ito, Jimmy, and Isaiah were going by water, with one of the armored vehicles loaded. We were leaving one here for the compound. I was going in the rig with Romeo and Lani. The second rig held Lex, Zach, and Blake. The third rig was driven by Kirk and held Duke and Bret Klein.
The goal was to meet up with the troopers and the National Guard in a house off St. Bernard Avenue and Filmore that the group had cleared and were using as a secondary base. Another team from the troopers would break off and hook up with the water craft at a park off Lakeshore Drive, close to Lakeview.
Ito would come in from the rear and we would come in from the main road with a direct assault. Hopefully, it would lead to a bunch of bikers peeing their pants and giving up like the pussies they were. Hopefully.
As we crossed the causeway that separated our compound from the main drag, I settled into the uncomfortable seat and closed my eyes to catch a few minutes of much needed rest.
Romeo didn’t talk and Lani was uncharacteristically quiet, so I slipped into a half doze. Lani usually talked my ear off, a constant barrage of questions about everything and anything. How to do this, and what was it like to do this or that? Poor thing hadn’t lived much before Z hit. She was a sheltered teenager and never got to explore the world before Z, much less live in it. Her quiet nervousness made me twitchy.
