by Alicia Rades
Ryland shoved himself between them, trying to wrestle the remote out of their hands. “You jackasses are going to hurt each other.”
Teagan brought her knees to her chest and screamed, “Everyone just shut up!”
Nobody did. They all just kept shouting obscenities at one another.
“What the hell is going on?” I demanded.
No one even looked my way, as if I weren't there.
“You dirt bag,” Venn growled at Ronark. I'd never seen such an angry expression on his face.
“Douche!” Ronark snapped back.
Venn let go of the remote with one hand to slug Ronark in the shoulder. Ronark's eyes blazed with fury, and he yanked back as hard as he could. He wrenched the remote out of Venn's and Ryland's hands and reeled backward onto the couch. The remote went flying out of his grip. He landed on top of Teagan, and his elbow slammed into her cheek.
Teagan screamed. Immediate rage burned in her features. She drew her arm back and punched Ronark in the side of the head. “Dick!”
She went to punch him again, but Ryland got there first. His hands fisted in Ronark's shirt, and he dragged him to his feet. “You're going to pay for that, asshole.”
Ronark flinched as Ryland drew his arm back, but Jenna leapt forward. She let out a high-pitched battle cry and jumped on Ryland's arm, practically wrapping her whole body around him.
“Leave him alone!” she screamed.
I was about to jump in and call a stop to this madness, but I suddenly didn't know whose side to take. One second Jenna was cursing at Ronark, and the next she was defending him. All this over the remote? This was so not normal.
Venn tried to peel Jenna off Ryland, all while her legs flailed and she screamed.
“Guys! Guys!” Fiona tried to get their attention, but it was to no avail.
Sondra pushed past us and grabbed Venn and Ryland by the ears.
Venn whirled around and slapped her hand away. “Get off me!”
I returned the knife to my boot, then rushed across the room and scooped up the remote. I hit the power button, and the TV went silent. Everyone froze. All eyes turned to me.
“What. Is. Wrong. With. You?” I demanded.
Ryland looked to Venn, who looked to Ronark, who looked to Jenna.
Teagan was the one who answered. “They're all being a bunch of pricks.”
“Yeah, I got that,” I snapped. “The question is why.”
“Ronark wants to watch the report on the DMR crackdowns, and Jenna wants to watch the ones on Matias,” Teagan answered.
“The reports on Matias are more useful to us,” Jenna insisted.
“That's not a reason to turn on each other,” I said. “For God's sake, you're acting like children. You're supposed to be on the same team.”
I looked to each of them to see a guilty expression fall across their faces. My eyes settled on Venn. His eyebrows were tightly knitted together, and his jaw was tightly clenched. He held my gaze for several seconds before huffing and storming out of the room.
What the hell? Venn had never looked at me like that before.
Anger bubbled up inside of me. “Grow up. All of you. Then come help us unload the car. We have shit to talk about.”
We unloaded our bags at the dining room table. Genevieve looked completely shocked. “He sold you all of this?”
“Not exactly,” I said.
Her eyes brightened. “He agreed to help?”
I bit my lower lip. “Uh, no.”
Genevieve looked suspicious. “What happened?”
“When we got there…” Sondra took a deep breath and dove into the story of what happened at Bloodstone.
Everyone around the table went speechless. We were all here except Venn, Ronark, and Jenna. Those three were all still salty about what happened earlier—whatever that was—and had gone to hide away in their rooms. I wanted to talk to Venn, but I couldn't get the look he'd given me out of my head. Something told me he wasn't interested in my company right now. Besides, I had plenty of other things to worry about.
Okay, maybe I was salty about earlier. Might as well admit it.
“Do you want help cataloging these?” I asked Genevieve after our story finished and people started to disperse.
“That’d be very helpful,” she said. “You’re familiar with all this?”
“Most of it,” I replied. “I worked there long enough. Most of it’s labeled, but I can help you determine the potency of the potions and things like that.”
Genevieve glanced into one of the bags. “Healing potions?”
“Yes,” I said. “They’re not nearly as potent as the one you gave Sondra, but they’re better than an Aspirin.”
“Perfect,” she responded. “Fiona, do you mind taking these upstairs with the others?”
“Not at all.” Fiona took the bag and left the room.
By now, Genevieve and I were alone in the kitchen. She sat across from me and started going through the bags. “Ooh, a sensory enhancement potion. I definitely want this one.”
“I also got these.” I took the cufflinks from my pocket and set them on the table between us. “I was thinking Ryland should take one since he’s already so strong. It’ll give him a bigger boost. And the other one could maybe go to Fiona, since she’s—”
“Weak?” Genevieve cocked an eyebrow at me.
“I was going to say fragile.” That sounded just as bad. “All I mean is that I care about her. I don’t want her getting hurt thinking she can take on someone bigger than herself.”
“She’s stronger than you think, Rae. She’s been doing this a long time.”
“I know, but…” I trailed off.
“But what?” Genevieve prodded.
I paused. I shifted in my chair and picked at my nails. “I guess you’re right. I underestimate her. I’ve been known to be a bad judge of character from time to time.”
I immediately thought of Zoey.
“That’s something you can work on,” Genevieve pointed out as she dug through the bags and set things upright on the table.
I gave her a slight smile. “People are wrong about you.”
Genevieve chuckled. “Is that so?”
I joined her in organizing the items in front of us. “Everyone makes you out to be scary. I don’t think you’re scary.”
“Darling, you don’t know a thing about me.” She sounded amused.
“I know you’re helping us,” I said. “I know you’re a very powerful witch. Would someone with a heart as black as they say be capable of what you are?”
She scoffed. “A black heart? Is that what they say about me?”
“No,” I replied quickly. “No one’s actually ever said that.”
Wow. I was totally sticking my foot in my mouth. That was meant to be a compliment.
Genevieve smiled. “I know what people think of me, and they have every reason to think those things. I have a very dark past, Rae. It’s only been recently that I’ve been trying to turn that around.”
“Trying?” I couldn’t help but fixate on the word.
She started on a new bag, ignoring my eyes on her. “It could take a lifetime or more to make up for what I’ve done.”
I hesitated. I wanted to know what she meant, but I didn’t know if I could ask.
“Do you want to know the truth, Rachel?” She could totally sense my curiosity.
“If you’re willing to share,” I said.
“You’re sure? It could very well ruin your perception of me,” she warned.
My mouth went dry. How could I resist this information? “I’m sure.”
Genevieve leaned toward me and folded her arms across the table. “I lie. I cheat. I steal. Worst of all, I kill.”
My body froze, and a chill ran down my spine. My voice shook when I spoke. “We’ve all done those things, haven’t we?”
She shook her head. “I’m not talking about little white lies and petty theft. I’m not talking about killing vampires. I’
m talking about human beings. No mercy.”
Genevieve was starting to scare me, but a part of me still trusted her.
“I’m sure they deserved it,” I said in a shaky tone.
“Did they?” she asked curiously. “I think they did, but who am I to judge?”
“What… what did they do to you?” I asked.
Genevieve got a blank, distant look on her face, as if she was traveling back to a painful past. “Horrible, horrible things. It started with my father, and then my husband.”
“Richard?” I asked, unsure what she meant.
“No, not Richard,” she said. “My first husband. When magic returned, I turned to dark magic as a means to escape. I tortured people to get to the men who hurt me, Rachel. Innocent people.”
I swallowed hard as bile rose to my throat. I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear the rest, but she continued anyway.
“I made my father watch as I tortured his new wife and children,” she said, dropping her gaze. “I burned him alive in his own house. And my ex-husband… well, he suffered a far painful death. He went mad before his body finally gave out.”
I shuddered at the thought.
Genevieve shook her head, like she was trying to push aside the memories. “I started mentoring others shortly afterward. I was hard on my mentees. Sometimes I’m shocked they learned anything from me at all.”
“Why are you telling me all this?”
“Because it’s not a secret, Rachel—not among those who know me, anyway. Part of healing involves admitting what happened, asking for forgiveness, and moving on instead of hiding from it.”
Her words hung in the air for several moments.
“How did you change?” I finally asked, cutting through the silence.
“Mostly magic,” she answered simply.
“Is there, like, a spell for it?”
“No. Not even magic can change a person who doesn’t want to change. Not permanently, anyway. I stopped trying to force my magic and started trusting my magic. Suddenly, magic became easier, and I knew it was working.”
“Magic isn’t that easy,” I argued. That’s why I preferred killing. Killing was easier.
“Magic is one of the easiest things in the world,” Genevieve replied. “Attuning yourself to it, on the other hand, is one of the hardest things to do.”
“Isn’t that the same thing?”
Genevieve didn’t get a chance to respond as the sound of footsteps entered the kitchen.
“Venn!” I shot to my feet eagerly.
He wore a dark hoodie with the hood pulled up over his head. His gaze fixed on the ground, and he continued through the kitchen like he didn’t hear me. He headed to the refrigerator, pulled out a bottled water, and chugged the whole thing.
“Venn?” I stepped toward him cautiously.
He wiped water from his lips and looked to me with tight eyebrows.
“Do you want to talk?” I asked softly.
“No,” he replied in a clipped tone that stung more than it should’ve.
“I just want to help,” I told him. “I know things are hard right now. You don’t have to tell me everything, but at least—”
“I said I didn’t need your help,” he snapped. It was so unlike him.
I reached out for him. “Venn, I understand—”
“You don’t understand shit!” he roared, swatting my hand away.
I stepped backward as tears rose to my eyes. Why was he shutting me out?
“Then help me understand,” I insisted.
“You barely understand magic,” he snarled. “How can you understand this?”
My stomach turned hollow as Venn whirled around and stomped out of the room.
18
I shot a desperate look at Genevieve, like she might be able to explain Venn’s erratic behavior. She looked just as shocked as I felt. A split second passed before I rushed out of the room after him.
“Venn!” I called. “Wait.”
The door to our guest room slammed behind him. When I tried to open it, the door handle wouldn’t twist. What the hell? He’d locked me out!?
“Venn, please,” I said through the door. “Let me in.”
He didn’t respond. Anger swept through me. I got that he was upset, but he didn’t have to make it personal.
“Venn!” I screamed.
The door beside me swung open. Jenna stepped out with her hair a mess, looking like she’d just woken from a nap. “What’s going on out here?”
“Venn’s shutting me out,” I told her.
Her expression became more alert. She shifted into big sister mode and pushed me out of the way to bang on the door. “Venn Michaels, you open this door right now, or so help me I will break it down!”
“Jenna, that’s not necessary,” I said.
She turned to me with a stern expression on her face. “Nobody hurts my Rugrat.”
“Thanks, but—”
“Venn!” She pounded on the door again.
“Go away!” he called back.
“You can’t shut her out forever!” Jenna snapped.
“Go. Away!” he repeated.
“Venn, please,” I begged. “I love you, but this is starting to get out of hand. If I did something wrong, please tell me so I can fix it.”
“I told you,” he shouted through the door. “You don’t understand.”
I just about snapped. What made him think I didn’t understand trauma? Had he not listened to any of the stories I’d told him?
“Seriously? Seriously!” I yelled at him. “You think I don’t know what it’s like to lose someone I love?”
“No!” Venn shouted. “You don't. You found your sister. I lost my brother!”
All the blood drained from my face. My knees shook as I absorbed the weight of what he’d just said.
Jenna turned to me. “Rach, he didn’t mean it.”
I barely heard her. “Venn… Venn resents me?”
“No,” she assured me, but I didn’t believe it. “He’s just going through a lot.”
“Then why would he say that?” I snapped. “People don’t say things like that unless they mean it.”
I turned back to the door and softened my tone. “Venn.”
He didn’t answer.
“This is hurting our connection,” I said. “Remember what you told me on the island? Being soulmates isn’t easy. We’re not perfect. We just have a strong connection. The connection dies if we don’t nurture it.”
I was paraphrasing.
Still, he said nothing.
I gave a light knock at the door again, but I was met with nothing but silence. Worry and anger knotted together in my gut, twisting everything around until I thought I might puke.
“Venn!” I shouted. “Jenna wasn’t kidding about breaking this door down.”
I thought I heard motion behind the door, but I couldn’t be sure. I reached for the handle and shook it, but it was still locked. I was ready to knock this door down myself. With all my strength, I kicked at the door, and it gave way.
When I saw Venn, it was like the world was at a standstill yet shifting from side to side all at the same time. I couldn’t move or breathe. I only stared.
Venn froze in place as he brought the back of his hand to his nose, where he was about to inhale a pink powder.
The world seemed to move again. Anger flooded through me. So much anger. I didn’t even know what to do with myself in that moment. It felt like I was watching myself outside my body as I marched across the room and slapped his hand away from his face. The pink powder rained down to the floor.
“Drugs!?” I exploded. “You’re doing drugs!”
Venn shot to his feet. His face came only inches from mine. “I told you that you wouldn’t understand!”
I threw my hands up. “Congratulations. You were right. I don’t understand how you can be doing drugs and didn’t even tell me about it. Do I even know you at all? How long has this been going on?”
“Rach
el,” Jenna tugged at my arm, but my feet remained firmly planted in place.
“I knew you were hiding something from me,” I accused, shoving my finger into his chest. “I knew it!”
“Rachel, calm down,” Jenna begged. “It’s not as bad as you think.”
I turned on her. “This shit is dangerous, Jenna!”
“Stop it, Rachel,” Jenna said. “Venn’s right. You don’t get it. You don’t know what the withdrawal is like.”
I drew in a sharp breath. “You! You’ve been doing this, too? That night you were all just hanging out, you were—”
“Yeah,” Jenna admitted with gritted teeth. “So what? It helps us deal with it.”
“This is not how you deal with it!” I screamed. “It’s just one more thing to get addicted to.”
“You don’t know what it’s like to be addicted to a vampire’s bite,” Jenna argued. “This isn’t half as bad as that.”
“It’s still clearly a problem,” I growled back. “You’ve all been so irritable lately. This is going to ruin relationships. Is that what you want?”
“That’s not what—” Venn started, but I cut him off.
“Is. That. What. You. Want?” I repeated.
“Rachel, stop it!” Jenna yelled.
“No, Jenna,” I shot back. “Ever since we got off that island, you’ve changed. What happened to the girl who was all about making the best out of a bad situation?”
“I am!” she shouted. “I’m dealing with it. Just because it’s not in the way you think I should be doesn’t mean I’m not doing something about it. It’s going to take time.”
I pressed my fingers to my temples. “I can’t believe we’re seriously having this conversation. I know what it’s like to hit rock bottom, but I was never stupid enough to turn to drugs to deal with it.”
“Really?” Venn asked. “So we’re stupid now?”
“No, I just—”
“You just what?” Venn growled. “You just want to control everything. You want life to be a perfect place where you can slay your vampires and save the day and everyone bows down at your feet at the end of it. Is that it?”
“This is what I’m talking about!” I yelled. “This isn’t you, Venn!”
