by Jenna Brandt
Margaret inhaled sharply and started to shake slightly. That was her father’s favorite passage in the Bible that talked about the attributes of love. He had quoted it to her more times than she could remember. Had Reverend Fisher planned this with her father before his death? Of course not. It had been several weeks since her father’s death, and she had told no one she was coming to church. There was no way he could have known she would be there and how this sermon would affect her, unless…. What if…? Could it be that…? No, it was only coincidence. It was the only thing that could explain how the reverend would have known. Or was it? Was it possible that God was real?
“The Apostle Paul talks in these verses about the characteristics of what Christian love should be. Many of us take for granted that God’s love for us embodies these attributes. Not one of them or a few of them, but all of them. His love is perfect. But even though He freely gives us this perfect love, many of us turn away from it.
“What we need to realize is that, if we walk openly in God’s love, not only will we feel His love for us, but we will be able to give His love to others. And this is not love by the world’s standards, but love by God’s standards—perfect, unconditional love.
“This is our highest command from God: to love one another. Yes, there will be times when it will be hard—there are those who seem to be unlovable—but those are the ones who need to be loved the most. If we ask God, He will give us the ability to love them because He will let His love for them pour through us. We are, after all, vessels of the Lord.
“Most of you know that I have an entirely different view from your former reverend as to how to win people into the Kingdom of God. If we preach ‘fire and brimstone’ to people, they will not receive the Lord. The only way to reach people is by loving them. After all, it was love that motivated Jesus, the Son of God, to come to Earth, sacrifice himself, and separate himself from His Father, so that you and I could feel His love without sin parting us.”
Margaret was rooted to her seat. In all the time she had attended church, she had never heard anyone speak out against the commonplace sermons about “fire and brimstone.” Truth be known, she had never really studied the Bible for herself because of how awful the previous reverend had made it sound. Why would she want to read a book that condemned and punished?
Was it possible that Reverend Fisher was right, that God wanted to love her regardless of her mistakes and that if she accepted that, she would never have to hear about “fire and brimstone” again? Her father had quoted 1 Corinthians 13 to her many times before, but she had never really understood the message until that moment.
No wonder she did not feel completely loved! Henry could never measure up to the love God could give her. Not only that, but he was using a flawed love that was only held up to the world’s standard.
This also explained why it was so hard for her to love Henry. She was trying to do it all by herself, and without God, nobody could love perfectly. She finally got it! It was like riding a horse with the wrong equipment. It would not feel right for the horse or the rider.
Margaret smiled to herself. Today was the beginning of something wonderful. She had no idea when she stepped foot into her father’s church that her life would really change. She was so glad that he had written that letter.
Margaret waited for everyone to leave before she approached Reverend Fisher.
“Reverend, sir, you do not know me, but you knew my father.”
The Reverend turned towards her with a knowing smile. “Yes, your father, the earl, spoke of you often. He told me you might come someday. He said he had something special planned. I am just sorry that you were not able to come while he was still alive. He would have loved to have seen you here. He prayed for so long that this day would come.”
A tear slipped down Margaret’s face. She too wished she had not been so foolish as to not have come sooner.
“Yes, I think I will regret it until my dying day that I did not come to know what my father knew until he was already gone.”
“So, you are saying that you have received Jesus Christ, then?”
Margaret nodded, replying, “When you said the prayer at the end of the service, I closed my eyes for the first time in prayer since I was a very little girl. I now believe all of what you said. I needed to hear it. While you were praying, I asked Jesus to come into my life, to change me and how I love others.”
“I am gladder than you will ever know. Your father meant a lot to me. He took me under his wing when I first got here from seminary. I am honored that God was able to use me to be the one to bring the earl’s daughter into the Lord’s Kingdom.”
Chapter 19
Henry approached Margaret, whom he had been avoiding often since she started attending church regularly. He did not seem to like the way she was changing. Or more pointedly, that she was changing because of some religious reason as opposed to him being the root of her change.
“My aunt insisted that you come for tea at their estate as soon as possible. She wants to give her condolences.” He paused for dramatic effect. “And, of course, fill you in on all the latest gossip that you have missed these past few weeks.”
Margaret gave her husband a pointed look and replied, “Of course.”
“So what shall I tell her?”
“I suppose an outing would be nice, and her servants do make a lovely cup of tea. Tell her I will call on her tomorrow if it is not inconvenient.”
“Good, I will send a message over straightaway.”
“I hear that you are a countess now and that your father left everything to you via my Henry. Is it true?” the baroness asked with obvious envy and scorn.
Margaret nodded. “Yes, after my brother’s death, he changed his will to make me his heir as long as I was married.” She did not mention the fact that, due to her father’s sickness, his estate had been impoverished and only the title was worth anything.
“How nice to not only be a viscountess but now a countess as well. But then, you also had the opportunity to be a duchess at one time as well, did you not?”
Resisting the urge to retaliate against the barb, Margaret remained still. After a month of trying to change into what God wanted her to be, it was still hard to fight her old nature. She had to remind herself that the baroness only acted the way she did because she was living her life without God’s love being at the center. “Yes, well, I suppose I am very content with my current titles.”
The baroness scrutinized every aspect of Margaret’s appearance. Still being in mourning, Margaret was wearing a traditional black dress that was well made in lace and fine muslin and trimmed in black ribbon. And although Margaret was dressed appropriately, it did not stop the baroness from picking at her once more.
“You still look a little bit under the weather, my dear. Do you really think you should be out so soon after your collapse?”
Margaret raised an eyebrow and replied, “I am feeling well, Lady Helen.” Then, almost as an afterthought, she asked, “By the by, where did you hear that I had a collapse?”
“Oh, come, come, girl, it is common knowledge that you were a bit ‘off’ after your father’s passing.”
“Please, appease me. Who told you that?”
She sighed. “Why, I heard it from one of the servants. You know how all the servants gossip among the estates.”
Margaret frowned. She felt like the baroness was hinting at something with that comment. What was she getting at?
“Yes, servants will gossip, but then, so do most of the women we know.”
“’Tis true, but servants’ gossip is so much more… interesting.” She leaned forward to make her point. “And more precise in nature.”
“It seems that you are dying to share a bit of information you found out.”
Pulling out her fan, the baroness mechanically flicked her wrist. “I heard that a certain young lady has been secretly seeing a certain duke. Her husband, of course, has no idea, but she is seeing him on the sly.”
Margaret made her best attempt to keep her anger hidden. It seemed that she had been tricked into coming over here. The baroness had no intentions for this to be a social call. This was a discreetly veiled attack, and the baroness was going for blood—her blood.
“Really? Why, I am pretty sure I know who you are talking about, but I believe I know the woman a little better than you. And let me reassure you that she has not been doing what the servants say she has. On the contrary, she has been avoiding this duke at all costs and it is he who, at every opportunity possible, has tried to seek her out in secret. She is faithful to her husband, and I am sure that she would like me to convey that to you.”
Narrowing her eyes, the baroness snapped her fan shut. “I am sure that is what she wants everyone to believe, but I have seen them dance together and share stolen glances when they think no one is watching. I also heard that they had a rendezvous at Lady Catherine’s ball. They thought no one saw them, but one of the servants had been passing through the opposite end of the garden and saw them in a, shall we say, intimate conversation. There is something between that woman and the duke, and if she has not been unfaithful to her husband as of yet, let me reassure you that it is only a matter of time.”
Margaret knew she needed to control her rising anger and so, from her newfound faith, she prayed internally. God, give me the strength not to retaliate against this infuriating woman. I need you to keep me from doing or saying something that I will regret.
Waving her hand in her face, Margaret said, “It seems, baroness, that you are right. I am feeling a bit under the weather. I think that perhaps I should be on my way.” She stood and inclined her head. “After all, my husband is waiting for me at our home.”
The baroness nodded in return. “Give my love to Henry.” She smiled one of her fake smiles and added, “Oh, and if you run into the woman we were discussing earlier, mention that if she is not more careful in the future, her husband is bound to find out.”
When Margaret returned home from her uncomfortable afternoon with the baroness, she considered going for a ride to clear her head. Not wanting to go alone, she decided to find Catherine and see if she was interested in going with her.
Margaret could think of nothing else but her disastrous teatime with the baroness. She had been unaware that someone had seen the duke approach her in the garden. What scared her more was that he had been intimately touching her, against her wishes of course, but would someone who was passing by know that, or would they have assumed that she had wanted him to be there with her?
Ever since she had found out, she had been praying that God would work in this situation and keep the duke out of her life. She really wanted to make her marriage work, and if she admitted it to herself, she knew deep down she loved Henry. She just wished he would attend church with her and find his own relationship with God. If he did, their life together would be perfect.
She really needed to go for a ride, so she hurried down the corridor to the library, thinking that Catherine might be reading in there. When she reached the doors to the room, she heard voices on the other side. She waited to hear whose they were.
Margaret recognized the first voice as belonging to Catherine. “Oh, Lord Marcus, you startled me. I was reading Faust and I did not hear you come in. What brings you here, my lord?”
“Why, I came here under the pretense to see your brother, Henry, but I must admit that my real motive was to see you.”
“Me? You flatter me, sir, but why do you seek me out?”
Margaret could hear the lechery enter his voice. “Because, my dear, I want to taste the merchandise before your brother sells it off to the highest bidder.”
She heard a gasp and a loud slap. Then she heard the baron curse, followed by scuffling and him saying, “I will teach you to slap me, girl! After I am through with you, you will be begging me to stop.”
My goodness, that bounder! That cad! Margaret thought. The nerve he had to come into her home and try to take advantage of Henry’s sister. She would not stand for it!
Margaret had heard enough. She barged in through the doors, catching the baron off guard with Catherine roughly trapped in his arms.
“I recommend you remove yourself from my sister.”
Immediately, he pushed Catherine away as if she were of no consequence.
“Lady Margaret, what brings you here at this precise time? I was under the impression that you were taking tea with my wife.”
So, Margaret thought, he had planned this whole thing. He knew that I would be away and that Henry was busy with his business affairs. Well, I will teach him to try to take advantage of an innocent girl!
“Yes, I just returned from being with your wife. I wonder how she would feel to know what you have been up to while you were away. I wanted to go for a ride and was coming to ask Catherine if she wished to go with me, but I can see that you were not expecting that. Let me make myself clear, Lord Marcus. If I ever see you making advances towards Lady Catherine again, I will personally see that your life becomes unbearable!” She paused and glared at him. “Do I make myself understood?”
He clenched his teeth and replied with malice, “Quite clear, Lady Margaret.”
“Good. Now, I would advise you to leave, quickly if I were you, before I inform my husband of what you attempted to do to his younger sister just moments ago in his own home.”
The baron’s eyes grew wide with fear. “You are going to tell Henry?”
Margaret tightened her lips. “Of course I am going to tell him. I tell my husband everything.”
He snickered with disbelief and replied sarcastically, “Yes, I am sure that you tell him about your dalliances with the duke. I am sure that they make terrific bedtime stories.”
She chose to ignore his barb. “I would make haste if I were you. You will not want Henry to catch up to you once he finds out.”
A look of sheer panic washed across the baron’s face before he rushed quickly from the room.
Catherine turned to face her sister with a look of shock and hurt. “I did not provoke that, Margaret. Honestly I did not!”
Margaret approached her sister-in-law and put her arms around her. “I know you did not. Lord Marcus has always been a lecher. He even made a pass at me one time. He is a horrible man who is married to a horrible woman. And thank goodness they did not have children, because no doubt they would be horrible as well.”
Laughing softly, Catherine tried to defuse the awkwardness in the room. “Thank you for intervening. I had no idea that he was going to try something like that.” A confused looked crossed the girl’s face before she asked, “What was he talking about regarding you and the duke?”
“Nothing. He was only trying to shift the focus onto someone else. Unfortunately, one never knows how someone is going to act, and people with money often think they can get away with anything.” She hugged her once more, then released her. “Now I must go inform Henry about what took place.”
Still shaking from the ordeal, Catherine implored in embarrassment, “Must you really? I was hoping that we could just forget about it.”
Margaret smiled grimly. “I wish that we could, but Henry needs to know so he can keep it from happening again. When it happened to me, I felt as you did and did not tell Henry, hoping it was an isolated incident. But the baron’s misconduct can no longer go ignored.”
Catherine nodded in surrender. “Then do what you must.”
As Margaret made her way to her husband’s study, she thought about what the baron had just done to Catherine. Margaret wished she had done something after he had made the comments he had during her sixteenth birthday. If she had, her sister would not have had to go through what just happened.
Knocking lightly on the study door, Margaret heard Henry say, “What is it?”
“Henry, can I speak with you a moment?” she asked as she opened the door and stepped into the room.
He glanced up. “Can it wait until a little later?” Then he loo
ked back down at his work.
“Actually, no, it cannot.”
Pushing the papers away, he stood up. “All right, I suppose I need a break anyway.” He came around the desk and sat on the corner of it, giving his undivided attention to Margaret. “What is it?”
She licked her lips. “It has to do with your uncle.”
He raised one of his eyebrows in question. “Oh, and what has the old goose done now?”
“He came here just a few minutes ago under the pretense to see you. I assume you know this?”
“I am aware.”
“Well, I went to find Catherine to see if she wanted to go for a ride, but when I got to the library, I found your uncle trying to… take advantage of her.”
Henry stood up slowly from the corner of his desk and asked, “Did you witness this?”
She nodded. “I overheard him making a crude sexual comment to her, and then she slapped him. He grabbed her and was about to….” She avoided saying it. “I intervened and told him to leave.”
Seeing the rage enter Henry’s eyes and the effort he was exerting to try to control it, Margaret knew the baron would be feeling Henry’s wrath soon enough.
“I appreciate your intervention, Margaret. Thank you for defending my sister’s honor. I will take care of the situation from here.”
She turned around to leave, then stopped. “What do you plan to do?”
He looked at her. “It is of no concern of yours.”
“But it is, you see, as I feel partially to blame for what just happened to Catherine. If I had said something a long time ago, something like this could have been avoided.”
“What are you talking about, Margaret?”
“Your uncle made an innuendo to me at my birthday celebration. I did not tell you because, to be quite honest, I felt embarrassed about the whole thing. Besides, someone interceded and I just wanted to forget the incident.” She frowned. “But I want him to stop this. He has no right trying to use young girls for his own disgusting purposes. Who knows who will be next—perhaps our daughter when we have one?”
