by Elin Peer
The moans and groans from the men in the group made me tense up. Storm was literally moving up and down on his seat. “Tell us more! How many were you with?”
I pointed to Emanuela. “She just said that I slept with one woman.”
“But why only one? Was she like a goddess or something? Did you stay with her all night?”
I rubbed my forehead. This was fucking awkward since Emanuela was sitting right next to me. “Yes, she was amazing.”
“How many times did you take her, then?”
“Only once and that was it.” I wanted this conversation to be over with. “I wanted more, but I dozed off after the first round and when I woke up, she was gone.”
Leo tilted his head to the side. “But you came back the next night, didn’t you?”
I hated being put on the spot like this. “No. And I have no plans to go back, either.”
They were confused and frustrated with me.
“Look, I’m sorry if the privilege of living among scores of women was wasted on me, but I don’t want a group of women, I want the right one. I want what Archer, Boulder, Magni, and Khan have. I want a relationship with a woman who loves me and whom I can love back.”
Storm leaned back in his seat. “Fuck, I wish I could play soccer as well as you. I would have swapped places with you right away.” He nodded at me. “And I guarantee you I would have worked my way through all forty women within a week.”
The other single men expressed their agreement and some got up to pat Storm’s back, spilling their beer in the process.
Empowered by the men’s support, Storm preached, “It’s stupid that we have ten million horny men up here, when it sounds like there are women leaving sex clubs in the Motherlands feeling unfulfilled. Someone needs to fix that!”
“I wouldn’t mind fixing it!” Leo muttered.
“What are you going to fix?” Raven was back and looking at Leo. “Not me, I hope?”
Willow gave Raven a smile. “No, it wasn’t about you. Leo and the other men were just whining about the unfairness of them being horny up here when millions of women are unsatisfied in the Motherlands.”
Raven sat down and leaned her elbows on her knees. “Ahh, I see. And once again, you men are missing the obvious.”
“Which is?” Leo crossed his arms.
“How do you plan on fulfilling millions of women’s needs when you can’t even fulfill the few women you have up here?”
Leo paled. “Raven, for fuck’s sake, your father would kill me if any of us as much as touched you, and I…”
“Hold on, sailor.” Raven raised her palm to silence him. “I’m not talking about my sexual needs. All I want is for you men to accept that equality is a real thing. That’s my biggest need.”
Leo shook his head like he had to clear it from the images that their conversation had inspired, and then he turned back to me. “If I could get a visa to come and visit you, could you take me to that sex club?”
“I don’t think any of you understand.” I paused until I had their full attention. “Do you really think that you could have sex with a woman without getting attached to her? I’m telling you, it’s one thing in theory when the women are faceless and nameless, but what if we were talking about Mila, Raven, Emanuela, Darlene, and Willow?” I looked at the five women present before turning to Leo. “Let’s say they were all single and in a sex club. Ask yourself what would happen if the woman you just had sex with moved on to sleep with me or Storm.”
Solo mumbled low. “I don’t like this example. Keep Willow out of it.”
“See my point? Solo can’t even discuss this on a theoretical level.”
“Yeah, but that’s different. He’s married to Willow.” Leo narrowed his eyes. “I wouldn’t know any of the women. If she moved on, I could move on too.”
“Except, you just had the most amazing sex of your life with Darlene, and…”
“Don’t think so…” Zasquash shook his head and gave a low growl.
“All right, then imagine Mila or Raven, but the point is that whomever you were with made the sweetest moans calling your name as she came in your arms. You fucking emptied yourself inside of her.”
Leo’s eyes darted between Mila and Raven and then he leaned his head back looking up at the sky while moving in his seat, clearly uncomfortable with the scenario I was painting.
“Leo, you’d better not be thinking about me and the stuff Hunter is saying.” Raven gave me a blameful look. “Why not use Emanuela as an example? She doesn’t have to work with him.”
I wasn’t going to tell Raven that the thought of any man with Emanuela made me angry. Instead I focused on Leo and the other men. “I don’t think it’s in our DNA to share our women. For centuries a wife has been the highest achievement a man could get. I’m telling you that once you’ve been with a woman, you’ll feel possessive of her. I know I feel extremely possessive of the woman I was with, even though it was just that one time.”
Emanuela gave me a questioning look while Solomon and Zasquash both made comments to support what I was saying.
“He’s right.”
“I would kill any man who tried to take Willow from me, and you all know it.”
“All right.” Leo scratched his head. “You have a point, so maybe we aren’t made for casual sex.”
Storm leaned back and grinned. “Speak for yourself. I’ve been married and that was a fucking disaster. I’m sure I could adjust to the new way of things. To me, it sounds like a luxury problem.”
Storm was my friend and when he had first been chosen in the Couples Matching Program, we had all been excited for him. That was until I met Genny, his wife, for the first time. Somehow, I had ended up with her alone in the kitchen and she had tried kissing me and whispered about all the things she wanted to do with me.
It was because of women like her and Alice that I had guarded my heart ever since.
“Okay, Storm, then you go knock yourself out. But for me it will always be about one woman only.”
Mila held her hand to her chest. “I think that’s beautiful.”
“Me too,” Darlene chipped in. “So, Hunter, did you find that one woman yet?”
It was hard not to look at Emanuela at that moment, but I kept my face impassive. “I’m working on it.”
CHAPTER 19
Under the Stars
Emanuela
It was almost two thirty in the morning before Mila, Hunter, Jonah, and I reached the Gray Manor.
We had dropped off Raven at her parents’ house since she wanted to spend time with her family before going back to the police academy Sunday night.
“I don’t feel like going to sleep yet.” Mila stretched her arms up like she could reach for the stars that shone above us.
“It’s a beautiful night.” Hunter leaned back his neck and looked up too.
Mila’s voice was soft. “If you are up for it, we could go to the star lounge.”
Jonah pulled his bag from Hunter’s hybrid. “I have no idea what that is, but it sounds fun.”
“It’s one of my favorite places in the mansion.”
“Then I would love to see it – should I bring my bag?”
“No, leave it here. We can get your bags later.”
Hunter, Jonah, and I all followed Mila to the star lounge, which turned out to be a rooftop terrace with two double chaise lounges, a telescope, and heaters for the cold nights.
“Sometimes my siblings and I sleep up here.” Mila walked over to the chaise lounges, which had thick blue cushions on them. “These are adjustable and can be reclined all the way down. It’s the best way to watch the stars. Try it.”
Jonah obliged and lay down on the one Mila was standing next to. “This is nice.”
“I know, right? Scoot over.”
With Mila and Jonah occupying the first chaise lounge, Hunter and I took the other one.
“Hang on.” Mila pulled out a large drawer underneath the cushion. “We’ve got blankets.�
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She was close enough that I could reach for the one she handed to me. “Thank you.”
“Hunter, there’s more under yours, if you want.”
“Nah, I’m good.”
“All right, but at least let me turn on the heaters. It’s cold tonight.”
“How do you recline this thing?” Hunter was turning and twisting trying to figure it out.
“Right there on the side, there’s a handle.”
“Ah, got it.”
We were shoulder to shoulder, flat on our backs, when Hunter began to point out different star constellations.
Jonah lifted his head and looked over. “How come you know so much about the stars?”
“It’s part of survival camp, which is a mandatory part of school here.”
Jonah turned his attention back to Mila. “Does that mean you know how to navigate by looking up at the stars too?”
“I know a little but I’m nowhere as good as Hunter. I think the boys had learned a lot before we even met them at the school.”
I broke into a smile. “I’m beginning to see that if there is ever a natural disaster, I’m going to stick with you, Hunter. You’re good at making a fire, and now I know you can find your way using the stars also.”
“Don’t forget that I can hunt too. Sometimes I wish something dramatic would happen that would make the Motlanders come begging us for help.”
Jonah objected, “We’re not completely helpless, you know. I can start a fire too.”
“Yes, but you aren’t typical for a Motlander man. And I mean that as a compliment.”
“I don’t know about that, Hunter. Maybe it’s just your idea of what a Motlander man is supposed to be like that needs to be adjusted a bit. We are evolving, just like you are.”
Hunter looked skeptical. “You think men in the Motherlands are trying to be more masculine in general?”
“Yes, I would say so, and I’m very aware that I am a role model to other men around me, especially the younger generation.”
“Sure, you’re a real role model of masculinity.” Hunter’s tone vibrated with humor.
“Yes, a role model of modern masculinity.”
Mila spoke up. “I think we’re seeing that same thing here.”
Hunter snorted. “What? Modern masculinity?”
Mila was quick to answer. “You think it’s a joke, Hunter, but it’s not. There’s a big difference between how my father’s generation and your generation are behaving as men. You’ve been exposed to women far more than they had at your age. You’re not as set in your ways as they are.”
“And that’s a good thing?”
Mila looked over at Hunter. “Of course that’s a good thing.”
Hunter groaned so I turned to ask, “You disagree?”
“I don’t know. Maybe we younger men are more flexible in some ways, but there is still a world of difference between a man born in the Motherlands and here.”
Mila smacked her tongue. “I never said there wasn’t.”
“Like for instance tonight when we talked about having sex with women, you were quiet, Jonah. And I’m sorry, but to me masculinity has a lot to do with attraction to women.”
“What a bunch of bullshit.”
My eyes flew to Mila, as it was the first time I had heard her use a swear word.
“If that was true then all homosexual males would be feminine and they are not. In fact, some of my father’s fiercest soldiers are gay.”
“Okay, fair point. But at least they are interested in sex. Men in the Motherlands typically aren’t.”
“Says the man who went to a sex club with my brother. Honestly, Hunter, do you even hear yourself?”
Hunter pushed up on his elbows. “Okay, so tell me this, Jonah, what are your thoughts on the conversation we had by the bonfire? Do you dream of having a wife and starting your own family?”
Jonah was quiet for a few seconds before he answered, “I never really thought about it.”
“Not even the sex part?”
“Well, I won’t deny that I’m intrigued by that part, but my fascination hasn’t been strong enough for me to try it out at the sex club or to engage in a sexual relationship with a woman.”
“It doesn’t have to be a woman,” Mila interjected.
“I know, but if I ever decide to have sex, it will be with a woman because I’m not attracted to men.”
“And would you be like me or Storm?”
“Who was Storm again?”
“The one who said he would have sex with as many as possible and not be bothered by jealousy.”
“Oh yeah, I remember now.” Jonah lifted a hand in the air. “Who knows? It’s all hypothetical at this point, and I have no idea how I would react if I fell in love.”
Mila answered in a low voice. “It’s hard to imagine you being possessive and jealous.”
“Thank you. I would like to think that I am too grounded and confident for that sort of silly behavior.”
“Hey.” Hunter groaned. “This possessive and jealous Nman over here is fucking confident and grounded too.”
Both Mila and Jonah looked over before they exchanged a glance.
“What?” Hunter scrunched his face up. “You don’t believe me?”
“I believe that you believe it.”
“Mila, stop being diplomatic. You know it only pisses me off. If you don’t think I’m grounded and confident then say it.”
“No, I know you’re confident but that’s not the same as having a high self-esteem, and ultimately you need that to be truly grounded.”
Hunter smacked his tongue and scoffed. “Confidence and self-esteem is totally the same thing.”
“No, it’s not.”
Jonah supported Mila. “It’s really not.”
“Whatever… I’m more fucking grounded than a fox hiding in his underground hole.”
I laughed. “That has to be the worst comparison ever. It makes no sense.”
When Hunter crossed his arms, signaling that he was done with this conversation, I turned to Mila instead. “Anyway, so tell me, Mila, what do you miss about the Motherlands?”
She pulled her blanket up higher. “Hmm, that’s a good question. “I’ve lived here half my life so it’s not something I think about on a daily basis.”
“There must be something you miss.” I felt bad for Hunter, who was quiet, so in an act of kindness I lifted my blanket to him. It was large enough for both of us and he accepted by pulling it over him just as Mila answered.
“What I miss the most is probably physical closeness. I mean I have it with my puppies and my youngest siblings, but even Mason, who’s ten now, feels that he’s too big to cuddle. In the Motherlands, people touch and cuddle all the time and I miss that.”
Jonah opened his arms. “I’ll cuddle with you.”
“Really?” Her gentle smile widened but then she looked to Hunter and it was replaced by a small frown. “Promise you won’t tell my dad.”
Hunter sighed. “I won’t tell, Mila, but do you think Magni would care? Jonah is a Motlander. He won’t overstep your boundaries.”
“My dad isn’t always rational when it comes to that sort of thing. It’s better if we don’t tell him.” She nuzzled herself against Jonah’s body and rested her head on his shoulder. “Don’t be mad if I fall asleep. I’m really tired.”
Jonah yawned and wrapped his arms around Mila like he’d known her for years. I smiled when he began circling her long blonde hair around his finger, the same way he always did with me.
“If you two start snoring we’ll let you know.” Hunter placed his hands under his head as a pillow and looked straight up. From the way he lowered his voice, I knew he was only talking to me when he said, “Isn’t it crazy to think that maybe there are humans out there?”
I turned my head to look at him. “You don’t really believe that, do you?”
“Could be. Some people make strong arguments that our ancestors created a colony in space.”<
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I turned my back to Mila and Jonah and propped myself up on my elbow to study Hunter. “It’s all science fiction.”
“No it’s not. There’s proof online. Videos on the Internet and that sort of thing.”
“You can’t trust any of it. It’s a big bundle of conspiracy theories, movies, fake research, and propaganda from the Toxic War. That’s why we haven’t used the old Internet in centuries.”
“It’s not all fake. In school we saw news clips of space ships being launched into space with people on board.”
I narrowed my eyes. “But it wasn’t real, was it?”
“It looked real. One of the videos was from a moon landing.”
“You want me to believe that humans colonized the moon?”
“I didn’t say that. But they visited.”
“Allegedly.”
“Yes, allegedly.”
I rubbed my eyes, feeling tired. “Sorry, Hunter, but I’m skeptical. I know our ancestors were far more advanced when it came to technology, but some of the legends are too wild to believe. A colony in space, artificial mutants created in labs to have incredible powers, and ships as big as villages sailing the oceans. It sounds like science fiction to me.” I yawned.
“All those things were true.”
“You don’t know that for sure, Hunter.”
“No. But at least they left us with the technology to clone. We couldn’t have brought back many of the species that died out during the Toxic War if not for that technology. It’s a shame they didn’t leave us with the ability to time travel too.”
“Oh, so we could have warned them about what was going to happen.”
“Yes.”
“I wish we could tell people back then to worry about saving the whales.”
“Why whales?”
“You know how important trees are to creating clean air for us to breathe, right?”
“Of course.”
“But did you know that whales help clean the air too?”
Hunter wrinkled his nose up and furrowed his brow. “Are you just making things up now?”
“No. We learned about this in school. It’s something about their poop stimulating the growth of phytoplankton, which pulls carbon from the atmosphere.” I gave a tired laugh. “It’s gross but true.”
