I shrug. “I don’t know. She isn’t allowed to have any contact with anyone for the first thirty days. But I haven’t gotten a call yet that says she’s escaped. So that’s something, I guess.” I laugh.
Vesper places her hand on my shoulder. “If you need anything, please ask. I know how hard this must be on you.”
“Thanks, but I’m okay actually. I mean, it’s a lot easier than wondering if she’s drunk herself to death yet. Plus, having Ethan home is great—someone to cheer me up, and someone to take half the hits she throws.”
When our food comes, things drift into easier conversation. We talk about the new clinic and my coffee shop that is now under construction, and I tell her about Ethan taking his test. She mentions that her sister will be coming home soon, and she wants to try to set them up, but I dismiss the thought completely. Aria is a wild child. Ethan is strait-laced. I couldn’t think of two other people who are so completely different.
Chapter 14
Three Months Later…
“Can you believe how hot it is out there?” Vesper asks, fanning herself with her hand as she steps into the nearly-done coffee shop.
I turn around laughing. “No, this heat is crazy. I mean, look at me.” I motion toward myself: cut-off jean shorts, flip-flops, tank top, and dark hair piled high on my head with loose strands clinging to my sweaty neck.
Liam walks in, causing the bell above the door to ring. “This place looks great.” He wraps his arm around Vesper’s shoulders while looking over everything.
“Who wants an iced coffee?” I ask, moving behind the counter.
“Me, please!” Vesper bounces up to the other side, ready and willing for any way to cool down.
“I’m glad we got everything up and running before we take off.” He looks quickly at Vesper. “I’m sorry we’re going to have to miss the grand opening though,” he says, looking back at me as I hand them both iced coffees.
I wave my hand through the air. “No worries. I’m just so happy that it’s nearly done. All that’s left is to add the finishing touches.” I gaze around the room, nearly drooling over the expensive coffee machines, rows and rows of books, and the beauty the construction company managed to restore to this antique building.
The door opens and Tyler walks in. “Hey, did someone forget to invite me to the party?” he asks, walking up behind the counter and pulling me against him, landing a soft, quick kiss on my lips.
“We just stopped by to check the place out,” Liam says, turning once again to look around.
“It looks great, right?” Tyler pulls away, doing the same as Liam.
“It does. And I’m sure it’s going to make a killing. Driving forty-five minutes to the city every time I want a gourmet coffee is a little ridiculous."
Vesper laughs and shakes her head. “He’s a bit spoiled by city life, if you can’t tell,” she teases.
I shrug. “Hey, there’s nothing wrong with a man who likes a good cup of coffee.”
“Thank you, Amy,” Liam says with a nod, holding his head high like he’s glad someone finally agrees with his views.
“Hey, Sis.” Ethan walks in, wearing his brand-new black police uniform.
“Ow ow!” Vesper catcalls, causing Liam to shoot her a dirty look and nudge her with his elbow.
“I’m just teasing him. Aren’t I, Ethan?” She looks over at him as he comes to a stop at her side.
Ethan’s face is now red, and he can’t contain his grin. “Are you ready to go get Mom?”
“She comes home today?” Vesper asks.
I take a deep breath. “She does. Fingers crossed that she can stick to her sobriety.” I grab my purse from beneath the counter and place it on my shoulder while turning to face Tyler.
“Good luck,” he says, pulling me against his chest.
“Thank you. I have a feeling we’ll need it.” I squeeze him as close as I can get him, needing to feel his comfort.
Tyler and I have only gotten in deeper in our relationship. If I’m not staying with him, he’s staying with me. He’s been my shoulder to lean on, and cry on, every day since Ethan and I took our mom to rehab. He’s listened to me worry about her, complain about this or that not working out with the coffee shop, and even given me advice. He’s always there keeping my spirits high, letting me know that I can trust him and that he’ll always be there for me.
“Call me if you need anything, okay?” he says, pulling away but keeping me at arm’s length.
I take a deep breath and nod. “Okay. I can do this.”
He offers up his boyish grin. “I love you.” He places his hand on my chin and directs my lips to his.
“I love you too,” I breathe out.
When I pull away, I turn to face everyone. “Okay, time to get out. I have to lock up.”
They all start heading in the direction of the door while chatting among themselves.
“Oh, Vesper, what time are you leaving tomorrow?”
She rolls her eyes. “Six a.m.”
“And you’re going to be gone a whole month?” I ask, pulling out the keys to lock up behind us.
“Yep, that’s the plan. Unless you need me back sooner. I’ll completely understand if you don’t want to stay at the ranch all that time.”
I laugh and playfully smack her arm, not at all surprised she’s trying to get out of this. “Not at all. My mom will stay in my apartment and I’ll stay at your place.”
Her eyes stretch wide with alarm. “Is it a good idea to leave her unattended as soon as she gets released?”
“Ethan will pop in and out throughout the evenings, and I’ll be in and out during the day. We can’t babysit her every second of every day. Let’s just hope she’s serious and wants to stay sober.”
Vesper pulls me in for a hug. “I’ll see you in a month. I can’t believe I’m moving to California.”
I smile, happy that she decided to stick it out with Liam instead of running away. “The next time I see you, I probably won’t recognize you with your beach tan.”
She rolls her eyes. “Me, relaxing on the beach all day? I’d go insane.” She forces a smile onto her face. “But let’s not talk about it. I’m going into this with an open mind.”
“Good for you.” I hug her one last time, and wave as she and Liam walk down the road to his fancy sports car.
“I’m serious, call me if you need anything at all,” Tyler says, pulling me against his chest.
“I know, and I will. I promise.” I press my mouth to his.
“Enough, you two. Get a room,” Ethan says, climbing behind the wheel of his new black Ford pickup truck.
Tyler doesn’t pull away though—he keeps kissing me while holding up his middle finger in Ethan’s direction. Over the last few months, Tyler and Ethan have grown close. The three of us have poker night at Ethan’s new apartment every Friday night, and Tyler even helped us get him moved. Everything seems to be heading in the right direction, but only time will tell when it comes to Mom.
“Call me when you get home. I’d love to finally meet your mom,” Tyler says, backing away.
I smile. “I will.” I stand back and watch him jog across the street and into his waiting truck.
I climb into the passenger seat and pull the seatbelt around me. “Well, how do you think this is going to go?” I ask.
Ethan shrugs as he pulls out onto the road. “I’m hoping everything goes well. I mean, I’d love to see Mom looking like her old self. I’d love for her to come home and start picking up the pieces of her life, working toward something, and staying sober. But I guess we won’t know until we know.”
I press my lips together and nod, opting to brace myself for the worst while hoping for the best.
Ethan and I walk into the rehab facility a little while later, and I feel like I’m waiting on pins and needles. In the three months she’s been here, I haven’t seen or talked to her once. Ethan made all the medical decisions that needed to be made, and he came to visit her and talked to her on
the phone.
I, however, was afraid to. Everything in my life finally felt like it was going right. And in the past, she was always the one who took that away from me. When I graduated high school and was preparing to leave for college, she informed me that I didn’t have any college money because she drank it all away, leaving me with mountains of debt from student loans. When I graduated college, she showed up drunk and fell down the ten steps to the auditorium. When I managed to find a job and my own place to live, she made it so I had to come take care of her every day.
Not having her in my life has resulted in the best months I can remember. I’ve actually gotten to live for me, and do what I wanted to do. I feel selfish for thinking this way, but there’s no way to change it. Our relationship has been strained for so long that I don’t know how to fix it, or if I even want to. So while she’s been in rehab, I’ve been keeping my distance and thinking about what kind of future we can have. I still haven’t made up my mind.
I’m staring at my feet when Ethan nudges me with his elbow. I look up at him, and he nods ahead. I look up and see a woman walking down the hallway with a nurse at her side. They’re chatting away, and for a brief second, I think, “That can’t be my mom.” But as she draws closer, I can see a resemblance. Her dark hair isn’t a crazy mess of tangles—it’s smoothed out and wavy as it frames her face. Her dark eyes are no longer bloodshot, and she wears a smile that I haven’t seen in years. Her dark hair is still graying, and the wrinkles are still around her eyes, but her cheeks no longer look hollow. They’re now plump and pink. She doesn’t look fragile or frail anymore. She’s gained some weight, making her look much healthier and stronger.
“Ethan,” she says, pulling him in for a hug. When she pulls away, she looks at me. “Amy,” she breathes out, looking as if she may cry.
“Mom?” I ask, a little breathless at the emotion pouring out of her with only my name.
Her dark eyes tear up as a sad smile appears. “I…I have so much to say to you, to ask forgiveness for.” She doesn’t hug me, because I think she feels the strain on our relationship as well, but she does hold out her hand.
I look from her hand, to her face, and back. Then I decide to take the olive branch. I hold her hand firmly in mine. “You look good, Mom. Really good.”
She wipes a tear that escaped her eye and rolled down her cheek. “So do you, Amy. You’re so beautiful. So grown up.” She releases my hand and brushes my hair away from my face. “Let’s get going, huh? I have things I’d like to say to both of you.”
She quickly says her goodbyes to the friends she’s made, and we three leave the building together.
Ethan drives us back, and the moment we walk into my apartment, I get to work on brewing some coffee. To keep myself busy, I throw a couple of pastries into the toaster oven to warm up. Mom and Ethan are both sitting at the kitchen table, waiting on me to stop fiddling around, but my nerves are through the roof. I’m so anxious about what she’s going to say. Is she going to say she’s sorry? And if she does, can I forgive her?
I pour three cups of coffee and take them to the table. Going back for the pastries, I put them all on a plate and set them in the center of the table for anyone to nibble on. Standing at the table, I look around for anything I could have forgotten.
“Oh, stop your worrying and sit down, Amy,” Mom says. “You’ve always been such a worrywart.”
With a deep sigh leaving my lips, I take the place between my mom and brother.
Mom takes a sip of her coffee, then sets it down gently. “I have apologies to make, but before I do, I’d like to try and explain myself.”
Ethan opens his mouth, but she holds up her finger, silencing him.
“I know explaining myself will not make up for any of the things I’ve done, but I’d like for you to at least know what I was going through when I made the horrible decisions I did. It wasn’t until therapy that I discovered them for myself.”
Ethan and I look at one another before he finally nods her on.
“Alcoholism has always run in my family. My father was a drunk. He would drink anything he could get his hands on. It cost him his job many times. And grandma, she was what we call a social drinker. However, I’m not sure if you can really call it that because she was always socializing. Growing up, we didn’t have much money, and drinking was a way of forgetting that we didn’t have much. It was fun, and at times, it seemed like it was the only fun that was had. I grew up watching my parents drink for several reasons. And I guess a part of me just always thought it was okay to reach for a drink when I’d had a hard day.”
God knows I’ve done that, but the rest of what my mom is describing feels so different from my own experience. Sure, I’ve had a drink to forget. I’ve had a drink to have fun. I’ve had a drink for no reason at all. But I’m not an alcoholic. I can turn it away if I want, and I in no way need to drink every day. How can two people be so similar and yet so different at the same time?
“I met your father at the bar here in town. We were both out with our friends, having fun. That night, I went home with him and little did I know then, but I got pregnant with Ethan. My whole pregnancy, I was so upset because while I had to change my lifestyle, he didn’t. I was left home alone while he went out drinking and partying at all hours of the night. So, once Ethan was finally born, I was able to be by his side again. I’m not saying your father was a bad man then. I loved him. He was a hard worker and provided everything his family needed. I won’t lie though, I didn’t want to be a mother. I wanted to be the twenty-two-year-old woman I was. I wanted to spend time with the man I loved, and I wanted to drink and have fun.”
She takes a deep breath. “For the first couple years of Ethan’s life, he was raised by my mother or babysitters so that I could go out and have a good time with your father. But then, all that drinking and partying led me to becoming pregnant with Amy. Again, I resented being pregnant. My life had to change again, but his didn’t. I thought everything would be okay, that it would be like it was the first time. But this time, it was different. He was going out and getting drunk without me. He was finding women who didn’t care that he was leaving his pregnant wife and son at home. Things between us went from bad to worse. I found out that he’d cheated on me, and I confronted him. I guess maybe I shouldn’t have done that, because that fight led to him smacking me and causing me to fall over. That fall sent me into early labor. He stormed out of the house, and that was the last time I saw him. I thought he’d find out I was in labor and come to the hospital, but he didn’t. Then I thought he’d sober up and come home when he’d cooled off, but as you know, he didn’t.
From then on, it was just too easy to drown out my problems with alcohol. I was a single woman with a little boy and a newborn baby, and I suddenly had to figure out how to provide. I don’t know if you remember or not, Ethan, but I took whatever job I could get. I waited tables, I cleaned houses, and I even landed a secretary job there for a little while. But when I came home, I was mom. I was so tired and so stressed that one drink led to two, and two to four, and four to an entire bottle. The longer I drank, the more I needed to drink. And before I knew it, you kids were grown and out of the house. I was all alone, and the depression, anger, and sadness were just too much.”
She looks at Ethan. “If it weren’t for you, Amy wouldn’t be here right now. I’m certain she would’ve been taken away at some point. You were the one who raised her until she could take care of herself. I stole your childhood, and for that I’ll forever be sorry. I can’t thank you enough for everything you’ve done for me. Even though I was the adult, you were the one taking care of everything. I don’t know how to repay you for that.” Tears are now streaming down her face.
Ethan reaches over and takes her hand in his, pressing a kiss to the top. “I don’t need an apology, Mom. And you don’t need to thank me. I’m just glad we’re finally getting you back.”
She turns and looks at me, and my blood runs cold.
Cha
pter 15
“Amy, I’ve never been a mother to you. You’ve taken care of me more than I’ve ever taken care of you.” She sniffles and wipes away more tears.
“Mom, this isn’t…”
“No, please. Let me get this out.” She takes a ragged breath. “Once Ethan left, if it hadn’t been for you, I’d be dead right now. I don’t know how many times you cared for me after I drank too much. I’ll never be able to give you your childhood back, and I know there will be this spot in me that’s always going to be broken, but I’d really like to fix us. I want to be your mother. And I know it will take a lot of work on both our parts to repair what I broke, but I want to do that work, Amy. I want you to be my daughter again. I know I haven’t said this in a very long time, but…I love you.” She looks at me and then at Ethan. “I love both of you.” She reaches for both of our hands.
“Is there any way you two will accept me back into your lives after all I’ve done?”
“Of course, Mom,” Ethan says, pulling his hand away and standing to give her a hug.
She releases my hand to hug him closer. I sit back in my seat, watching them and wondering how he can be so quick to just forgive twenty years’ worth of bullshit.
* * *
I cross my arms over my chest, watching them.
* * *
They pull away and she looks at me. “What do you say, Amy? Can our relationship be repaired?”
I look from my mom and then to Ethan. I’m frozen. I don’t know what to say or what to do. Yes, I’d love for us to repair what’s been broken. But can I? Can I put everything behind us and start over? Can I forget every horrible thing she’s put me through? Missing all my school plays, not being able to ever have a sleepover like all my friends, never getting a memorable birthday or Christmas. Can I forget all of that?
“Amy,” Ethan says, motioning toward Mom, urging me to accept her apology.
Claimed By Him: (Contemporary Romance Box Set) Page 24
