Sam wakes me when she comes into my room with the cell phone I left in my purse that I dropped by the door.
“It’s been ringing nonstop. It’s Griffin.” She hands it over.
I shake my head. “I can’t. Not yet. Not until I’ve had time to process this.”
“Do you want me to answer?”
I shrug. “Let him know that I’m home safe. Tell him I got sick, but don’t you dare tell him why. That’s something I need to do in person.”
She nods and answers it when it starts to ring yet again.
“Hello? Griffin?”
She pauses.
“This is El’s roommate, Sam. She came home a little bit ago, but she’s sick and went straight to bed…said something about a nasty sandwich cart.” Her eyes grow wide, something she does when she lies. Luckily, she’s on the phone and he can’t see her.
“I’ll let her know you called. Bye.” She hangs up the phone and drops it onto my bed. “Penny for your thoughts?” She sits on the edge, watching me.
I sit up, pulling my knees to my chest as I wrap my arms around them. “Am I afraid I’ll ruin his life? Yes. Am I afraid he won’t want me anymore? Yes. But deep down, I know he’ll do what needs to be done. In the long run, even if we don’t work out, he’ll support this baby.”
“And what about you?”
I shrug as more tears fall. “It’s just not the time, Sam. Grad school, years of paying my dues to land my dream job, I see it all slipping away. This wasn’t supposed to happen yet! I was supposed to go to graduate school, work hard, land my dream job, find my husband, have a few years alone together, then have a baby.” I let out a long breath. “This is all out of order.”
She gently rubs my arm up and down. “That’s okay, El. Yes, things are out of order, but having this baby now doesn’t mean that you can’t still have all the other stuff.”
I dry my cheeks. “I know, you’re right, but it’s not what I wanted…at all. I think I’ll get some sleep, then go over to Griffin’s in the morning and tell him the news. I just need to relax and get some rest first.”
She forces a smile and nods before leaving me alone.
In the morning, I wake up early and take a long, hot shower. I stall by taking extra time to make sure my hair and makeup are perfect. I don’t know why something like that matters in this instant, but it does. I want to look beautiful. I want him to look at me and see this new future before us, and I want him to want it.
I pull on a pair of skinny jeans, my wine-colored Chucks, and a gray tank top that hugs my every curve. I add my slouchy hat and sunglasses as finishing touches, and step up to the curb to hail a taxi.
The entire drive to his house, my nerves are a mess. I almost chicken out two different times. I have the cab driver turn around once before changing my mind and having him go back. When he drops me off at the curb, I think he’s relieved to be rid of me.
I step up to the gate and enter the code to let myself in, wanting to surprise him. It takes another five minutes of willing myself to do this while walking up the long brick drive. Finally, I’m standing on the front steps, looking up at the massive house. My heart is pounding a mile a minute and my breathing is coming out in short puffs. My stomach rolls and I feel the urge to empty it of its contents, but refuse to be found puking in the priceless landscaping that surrounds the porch. With a deep breath, I raise my hand to grab ahold of the knob, and the door opens. I quickly step back as a blonde rushes out.
“Oh, I’m sorry,” she says, freezing when she sees me.
“I’m…” I frown, taking in her features, wondering why in the hell she would be leaving Griffin’s house this early in the morning. “I’m sorry. Who are you?”
She smiles and holds out her hand to shake. “I’m Candice. You must be El.”
I shake her hand slowly, not sure what’s happening. “Yeah, I am. I’m dating Griffin. Can I ask why you’re here?”
Her eyes go wide. “Oh, um. Well…” Her eyes dash away from mine as a car pulls into the drive. “I think you should talk with him about that. I’m sorry. I have to go. That’s my ride.” She rushes into the car.
I stand, dumbfounded, watching as the car drives away. I look from the car, to the door, and back at the now-empty driveway.
Candice was here. I look at my watch and see that it’s only just now going on eight a.m. No meeting is held before eight a.m. If she’s leaving this early, it’s because she slept over.
Anger washes over me. I can’t believe this. Has he been seeing her this whole time—ever since I saw her going into his office all those weeks ago? He told me it was business-related. But what kind of business takes place at his home, on a Saturday, before eight a.m.?
Tears flood my eyes as I push myself from the porch, nearly jogging down the drive while fumbling with my phone. I need a ride. I can’t go in there. I can’t let him see how hurt I am. I can’t give him the opportunity to lie to me yet again.
I begin walking down the road as I wait for my ride. Eventually, it pulls up to the curb and I climb inside. Everything is flooding my brain more quickly than I can process. I don’t know what I’ll do about this baby, but I do know what I’ll do about myself.
I won’t be going back to work. I won’t be going to grad school in Chicago. I’ll leave the city. I’ll start a new life and raise this baby on my own. There’s tons of help out there for a single mother in school. I can get into affordable housing, and get grants for school and childcare. I can do this.
I can do this on my own.
Chapter 18
Griffin
It’s going on noon and I still haven’t heard from El. I’m starting to worry since Sam said she came home sick last night. I keep telling myself to just be patient and wait. When she feels better, she’ll call. I distract myself with business calls. I go by the office and wrap up a few last-minute things with the magazine, then head out for lunch. While I’m sitting back and enjoying my drink, I take my phone out of my pocket and call her. It rings several times before going to voicemail.
I tell myself she must still be sleeping, and that I’ll try again later. I slide the phone back into my pocket when my late lunch is placed on the table in front of me. I eat alone, have another drink, and head back to the office. I’m sitting behind my desk, going over my schedule, when my phone rings. I jump to answer it, hoping it’s El, but I see Vincent’s name flashing on the screen.
“Hey, man. What’s up?” I ask, happy that he called. There are things we need to discuss, but I’m also happy for the distraction.
“You sound awfully chipper…considering.”
“Considering what, exactly?” I ask, confusion washing over me.
“What do you mean, considering what? Haven’t you talked to Janelle?”
“El? No. Not since last night, anyway. Last time I heard, she was sick. I’ve been trying to call her all day, but I guess she’s been too sick to answer. I’ve been trying to talk myself out of going over there. I don’t want to bother her if she’s not feeling well.”
“So, you don’t know?”
“Know what, man?” Nervousness washes over me, making my heart rate pick up.
“Griffin, she’s leaving,” he blurts out.
“What? Leaving? What the fuck are you talking about?” I shoot up out of my chair, anxiousness taking over and making me pace the varnish off the floor.
“Griffin,” he says calmly, “Janelle is packing up to leave the city. She called Alison just a bit ago, crying—and I mean, crying to the point where it was hard to understand her.”
“Why? Is she okay?”
“She’s pregnant, man.”
Everything inside of me freezes: my actions, my thoughts, my breathing—all freeze as his words sink in.
“Are you there?” he asks after a long pause.
How? How did this happen? When did she find out? Why didn’t she come to me? And why is she crying? She must know how I feel about her by now. She has to know I’d do anything f
or her, and that I’d want this baby.
“Griffin?”
“Yeah?” I snap out of my daze.
“You didn’t know?”
“No, no, I didn’t know. I was with her just last night. She got dressed and left to go out with the interns. She was supposed to come back to my place, but when I called, her roommate answered her phone and said she was sick. She’s been avoiding me all day.”
“That’s because when she went to tell you the news, she found Candice sneaking out of your house bright and early like she slept over. Tell me you didn’t, Griffin. Tell me you’re not getting mixed up with her again.”
Fuck.
I shake my head, needing to figure this out.
“I’ll call you back,” I say before hanging up without a goodbye.
I need to work this out—get everything straightened out on my end before I attempt to explain this to anyone else.
Candice is my secret weapon, and the only way to keep her a secret is to keep her out of everything.
My phone starts ringing again. Without thinking, I answer.
“Hello?”
“Griffin, you hurt my sister, and I’m going to rip your balls off!” Alison says.
I let out a long breath. “It’s not what you think, Alison. Trust me.”
“Trust you? How in the hell am I supposed to trust you right now?” Her voice is high-pitched and angry.
I’m not sure, but I think it’s time to let this secret go. If it all blows up in my face, so be it. But it has to come out, because I refuse to lose the only person who means anything to me.
“Put me on speaker,” I demand.
I hear a click. “Okay, we’re both here,” Alison says.
“I’m here, man. What’s going on?” Vince asks.
“I need you to listen to me very carefully. No one else is around, right?”
“No, it’s just Alison and me.”
“All right…here goes. So back when Candice stole all of the hotel’s valuable information and turned it over to the Brookport Hotel, both hotels released a series of commercials and ads. Brookport stole Castille’s ideas, then sued for copyright infringement. With all of our files being compromised, there wasn’t any proof that Brookport stole from us, and not the other way around. The legal team has been able to buy time until we could find a solution, and finally, I found one.” I pause to take a breath. “Next month in court, Candice is going to confess to stealing our files and turning them over to Brookport,” I reveal. “The lawsuit will be gone, and we can countersue to recoup the funds the hotel put into fighting this off. The whole case rests on her.”
“Oh, that’s brilliant,” Vince says. “How’d you get her to do it?”
“A few months ago, I discovered that she’d been fired from Brookport. I reached out to her. She denied me on the spot, and I thought there wasn’t a chance in hell. But then she contacted me a few weeks ago. She came to my office and told me that Brookport was trying to gather information on her in an attempt to put her away. Apparently, she had a thing going on with the owner, and it didn’t work out very well. She’s not doing this for us; she’s doing it for herself. She’s trying to get herself out of the hole she dug.”
I pour a drink and throw myself back into my chair. “With Brookport watching her every move in an attempt to get whatever dirt they can find, I’ve had to hide her so they don’t find out she’s going to testify against them. She’s been staying at the hotel, but I let her crash here last night because she said someone was following her—watching her. Last night, I made arrangements to get her someplace safe until the trial. She must have run into El this morning when she left.”
“You have to tell her, Griffin,” Alison says.
“I’ve been trying, but she won’t answer her phone.”
“Go over there! Now!”
“You think she’ll let me in?”
“Make her. She’s upset. She thinks you’ve been cheating on her, and that you won’t want this baby. Make her see reason. You have to.”
I nod like she can see me as I pull the phone away and hang it up. I pick up my glass, throw back the liquid, and take a deep breath. I have to get her to listen.
I rush from my office, locking up as I leave, and stop by a flower shop. I buy a dozen white and pink roses, and drive directly to her apartment building. I park up front, unconcerned with the NO PARKING sign. I don’t give a shit if my car gets towed. All I care about is finding her and telling her the truth.
But what if she won’t listen? Or worse, what if she listens but doesn’t believe me? I can’t survive losing her. Everything in my life has changed for the better. I’ve learned to let loose since meeting her. I’ve learned there’s more to life than work. I’ve learned to laugh. I’ve learned to trust and love again. El gave me all of these things, and I’ll never be the same if she takes it all away.
I grab the flowers from the passenger seat and rush to the door. I pull back on the handle, but it’s locked. You have to have a key to get into the building. I know if I buzz her apartment, she’ll never let me in. So instead, I plop down on the front stairs. If she won’t answer the phone and she won’t let me in, then I’ll wait and sneak in as soon as someone comes in or out. Then there will only be one more door in my way.
As I sit on the front steps, I think over our time together. The first time I saw her, it was like she stole the air from my lungs. The time I saw Chase giving her flowers, it felt like I had been kicked in the gut. I think about how red her face got when she spilled the coffee in my lap and then proceeded to try drying it up with tissues—our first innocent touch that was anything but innocent. The first time my lips met hers. The first taste I had of her in that busy club restroom. Our first time. Our last time. All the times in-between.
Just thinking of her causes me to smell the subtle scent of her perfume. I can feel her soft ivory skin like I’m caressing her cheek with the back of my hand the way I always did when she slept. I can smell her shampoo on my pillows. I can feel the warmth of her bare skin against mine. I can taste her sweet lips that cause shivers to run up my spine. Nothing will stop me from getting to her.
Nothing.
She’s mine, whether she knows it or not. Nothing will stop me from proving that to her time and time again. I want her. I want this baby. I want our future—the one she imagined—with us playing in the yard with our kids and dog. Already, I picture tucking in our kids for bed, helping her clean up the kitchen after a big family dinner, and making love to her on that white tiled island in the kitchen we share.
Tears cause my vision to blur, and I wipe them away, unaware they had even formed. I haven’t cried in years. To be honest, I didn’t even know it was possible for me to cry anymore. My life hasn’t been an easy one. Every moment has been a struggle. I’ve always fought with myself, never being able to decide if I needed to give up or fight harder. For once in my life, I know the answer.
I have to fight harder.
Chapter 19
Janelle
My phone has done nothing but ring off the hook today. Every time it rings, it only causes my head to pound harder. I shut it off long ago, hoping it would give me some kind of relief. Instead of lying in bed and crying all day, I decide to pamper myself. I need to relax so I can think clearly and decide whether or not I’m doing the right thing by leaving the city. But I know that if I stay, he’ll never leave me be, especially when he finds out I’m carrying his child.
It’s not that I don’t want to be with Griffin, but how can I be with someone who cheats on me? And even if I’m blowing things way out of proportion, how can I be with someone who keeps something like this from me? Weeks ago, when I asked him about Candice, he told me I had nothing to worry about. I let it go, trusting him—but apparently, I shouldn’t have, because she stayed at his house last night.
“You know, he can’t explain himself if you avoid him,” Sam says, sticking her head in my room to find me sitting on the floor as I flip through pict
ures of us—pictures I’d taken on our little vacation and uploaded to my computer.
“I’m not sure I’m ready to listen to his explanation just yet,” I reply, refusing to look away from the screen.
Sam walks deeper into my room and sits down beside me. “You’d rather sit here being sad? That doesn’t make sense, El.”
A puff of air leaves my lips, almost in a laugh. “It doesn’t, does it?” I look up at her with my brows pulled together.
She shakes her head. “Why don’t you tell me the real reason you’re avoiding him?”
I tear my eyes from hers, directing all my attention back at the screen. “I’m afraid he’ll confirm my worst fears: that he’s been sleeping with her behind my back all this time. That he’s leaving me to be with her, and was just waiting for the right time to tell me. That he doesn’t want anything to do with me or this baby. That we’ll be alone.”
She reaches over and rubs my arm. “So what if he does say those things?” My eyes jump up to hers. “Okay, I didn’t mean it like that,” she continues, “I’m just saying that if he does say that, you still won’t be alone. You’ll have me, and you’ll have your family. You can still get everything you want out of life. And then at least you’ll know. You won’t be stuck here in limbo, just waiting.”
“I love him, Sam.” I shake my head as more tears fall. “I know I’m not supposed to. We were just messing around. But somewhere along the way, I fell for him. I don’t know if I can survive losing him, but I also don’t know if I can ever trust him again either. Even if he comes here and tells me everything I want to hear, won’t I always wonder what he’s hiding? Every time he leaves for work, won’t I wonder if he’s with her?”
“If it’s meant to be, it will work out, El. I know you’re not the mushy kind who believes in fate or destiny or soulmates, but somewhere deep inside, I know you want to believe. Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith.” Slowly, she stands and leaves me alone to think things over.
Claimed By Him: (Contemporary Romance Box Set) Page 69
