“Okay, well, I’d like you to meet the people behind last week’s charity event. Les thinks you should see what they do behind the scenes.”
“That would be good. I was intrigued by them.” I’d love to learn more about what they do and how the money they raise is spent. “Will you have any time on the track today?”
“I’m not sure, why?”
“No reason,” I say, although I did enjoy watching him yesterday, alone on the track, his car whizzing around doing lap after lap.
“Come on. Let’s go and meet everyone, because having you in my office does nothing for my concentration levels.”
I offer a weak smile as he gets to his feet. I grab my bag because everything I need for the day is in it. I place my hand on the door handle to open the door, but Ryan’s hand stops me. His presence behind me is un-nerving. “I made a promise to myself after yesterday I’d try and be as professional as you, but I can’t. There’s just something about you, Ellie Cooper, that I want.” His voice is but a whisper against the back of my neck, sending shivers down my spine. I can feel his firm chest against my back, and his hands slide down my arms. The scent of his aftershave fills the air around me and it’s fast becoming one of my favourite smells.
Slowly, I turn around, coming face-to-face with him. His perfect, kissable lips are right there for the taking and that would be so damn easy. His lips are slightly parted, and dear God, I remember how good he fucking tasted, but… I can’t, for my own well-being.
“Sometimes we have to learn that we can’t always get what we want in life,” I say quietly, trying to remain calm and hoping he can’t see how his words and soft tone affect me.
He lowers his face and I’m already powerless and ready to admit defeat, except…
“That is true, but right now, I could easily take you, and we both know you would let me seduce you.”
“You could, but let me give you something to think about; if you do, I’ll be straight out of this building and back to the office, and I’d instruct Frank to give this assignment to someone else.”
“I don’t want anyone else.”
“Well then, I suggest you take a step back and give a girl some space to breathe. Me and you, we’ll have to talk boundaries today, but for now, I’d like to hear all about the charity.”
Good girl. See I can resist him, but the question is for how long?
He sighs heavily, shaking his head, removing his hands from me, but he does manage a smile of sorts. “Okay, I’ll let you win, for now.” Ryan opens the office door for me and we walk together along the corridor and down the stairs. Considering I saw lots of Ryan’s team here yesterday, the building seems quiet. Maybe the guys have some time off before heading to Monaco next week. I don’t ask him.
Downstairs, I’m introduced to a woman I’d say is maybe a few years older than me; Claire. She’s in charge of the charity, Raising Hope, for children whose parents are addicts. I sit down on the sofa, and she takes a seat beside me. She has a folder in her hands. Ryan leans against the office table.
“I’m so pleased this man has finally seen common sense,” Claire says, her eyes darting to Ryan.
“Common sense?” I question and I’m not sure common sense and Ryan go together.
“Yes. Ryan is a gem when it comes to the charity, helping out, funding days for our families, especially our children, but our charity doesn’t get the same attention as some other charities. Not that I’m against any of them getting exposure, but if we get the right exposure, you’ve no idea the help we can give.”
Ryan doesn’t say anything; he just leans there, looking somewhat bashful. I can already feel my heart rate pick up and I have no idea if I’ll be able to control my emotions or if they’ll get the better of me. “Do you mind me taking notes?” I ask.
“No, of course not.”
I grab a pen and my trusted notepad. “Claire, if you could start off with the basics of the charity, and if there’s anything I’m unsure about, I’ll ask some questions.”
She nods. “Our charity was formed ten years ago. Our aim is to help children born to addicts, to help give them as normal as possible lives.” A lump forms in my throat as I listen to her. “Their parents’ lifestyle is not the children’s fault. We work alongside families and social services to ensure families stay together where possible. Obviously, if one or both parents are still abusing alcohol or drugs then…”
“I get it. So, is there a support network provided for parents from yourselves?”
“Yes. Our priority is always the children, but if parents are willing and want help in dealing with their addiction then we will never turn anyone away.”
Thoughts of me sitting on my doorstep waiting on my mum to come home one dark night fill my mind. I don’t remember what age I was, but I was young, maybe only seven. I sat there all night in the cold and she never showed up, but Grace did. She came to take me to school and I still remember her engulfing her arms around my frozen body, lifting me, cursing my mother as she bundled me into her car and took me safely to her home.
“Ellie? Ellie, are you okay?” Ryan asks.
I look up to see him moving toward me. “Sorry, I was lost in thought.” I turn back to Claire. “Sorry, please continue.”
“I’d like to show you some of my cases. Names and all pictures have been removed for privacy reasons,” she says, opening the folder.
“I understand.”
She gives me the folder and I read through the first case. A small boy who lives with his mother, doesn’t know his father and it’s highly doubtful that even his mother knows him. The boy was removed from his mother’s care when he was only weeks old and has only recently been re-introduced to her. She’s now been clean for two years and wants a nice house and to be able to provide a safe home environment. She was abusing drugs from the age of thirteen… I’m not sure I have the strength to continue reading. The similarities between him and me are there before me, written down in black and white. The only difference was, my mum didn’t give a toss what happened to me. She wasn’t prepared to fight to keep us together as a family.
I know my eyes are filled with unshed tears and I’m hoping I can keep them where they are. My past can’t be changed, but this little boy and many more kids like him, they don’t have to go through what I went through.
“Okay, so I understand what you do, but where do you come into this?” I ask, looking into Ryan’s dark eyes.
“I believe every child, no matter their circumstances, should have normal childhood experiences,” he tells me, his head tilting to the side. I’m certain he’s trying to figure out what’s wrong with me. “I have funds that can help with that, but as Claire says, she’d like others in the country to know about the work of this charity. We plan to launch offices in another six cities here in the UK because this is a huge problem.”
“Wow.” Yes, I think Ryan Jackson has managed to leave me stumped.
“Now you can see why we need to let others see what this charity can do,” Claire says.
“Yes, I can. So, say I make a start on this story now, what do you want me to include and what do you really not want to see written in the papers?”
“That’s easy. I’m happy for you to print anything except names of families.”
“That goes without saying. Ryan, what do want to gain from this?”
“I’d be much happier being left out of it,” he says, slouching back against the table. “But I know the charity will get more exposure with me being associated with it.”
“Yes, it will,” I say. “I’m going to need a picture to go with this. I’m thinking maybe something with you on the track, car…”
“Kids in the background.” I look at Claire, surprised at what she’s saying.
“I’m not sure that would work, given we want to keep privacy,” I tell her.
“I know what you mean, but we do already have a shot of Ryan trackside, giving some kids a few basic safety lessons. All of the kids are with the
ir backs to the camera. It’s a picture I want to use because you see this one’s softer side.”
“Could I see it?”
“Of course.” Claire moves from the sofa and sits down at her desk and starts typing on the keyboard.
“I bet you don’t think I have a softer side?” Ryan says, sitting down beside me.
“I could warm to that side of you.” The words are out of my mouth before I’ve even realised I’ve uttered them.
“And I could warm to the softer side of you. I’m going to wear you down, no matter how long it takes me,” he says quietly. Thankfully, I’m not sure Claire can hear our conversation; she’s lost in total concentration as she looks for the picture. “Found it,” she calls out. Ryan and I go and have a look.
“It’s perfect,” I say, taking in the picture. Ryan is crouched down, almost on his knees, his race car in the background and eight kids standing with their backs to the camera, hanging on every word that Ryan says to them. “Do you like kids then?” I ask him.
“He is just a big kid at heart,” Claire answers, laughing at him.
“Now that I can believe.”
“Hey, you two, I’m not hanging around here all day just so you can make fun of me,” he says with his hand across his heart, feigning hurt.
“Ryan, I know you must be busy. You can leave me here. I promise I won’t get lost or get in the way.”
“There’s not much happening in the building or trackside today,” he tells me.
“Even better. If Claire doesn’t mind, I’ll hang about here taking more notes then I can make a start on a story.”
“And we’ll be able to read it before it goes to print?”
“Yes, that is what Les had asked. And when it comes to highlighting the charity, I want to ensure you are all happy with the story before print.”
“Thank you,” they say in unison.
“Ellie, I’m not sure I’ll get back before you leave,” Ryan says.
“Go and do whatever you need to do. I’m sure I’ll be fine, and if I get anything written I’ll send it to Les.”
“Okay, but call me later and let me know how you get on.”
“I don’t have your number.” And I’m not sure having it is a good idea.
“I have yours. I’ll drop you a text and then you can save it.”
“Fine. Now will you just leave,” I say, glancing at Claire for some help.
“I’ll look after Ellie,” she says, and with a nod of his head, he leaves Claire’s office. “It seems you’ve made an impression on our Ryan.”
“What do I say to that?”
“Nothing, although I want to be the first to know if I have to buy a new hat.”
“Claire!”
“Only saying how I see it. Now, come on, and we’ll see what else I can give you to work with.”
I really like Claire. Considering I’m a journalist, everyone has been nice to me. I’ll try not take it for granted because I know my next assignment could easily turn someone’s life upside down.
For now, I’m hoping this assignment helps save someone’s life.
Chapter 10
What a day.
I feel as though I’ve learned lots about Ryan, but most importantly, about the charity. I have spent the afternoon sitting trackside, writing the first draft of an article. The best part is, I think it shows Ryan in a completely different light from anything that has been written about him before.
I’ve also spoken to Frank about the first article and he’s more than happy. He didn’t expect anything this week. If I can get this finished tomorrow, then Les and Claire can see it before I submit to editing. I know Ryan said he’d like to read it, but I actually want to see his face when he reads it in the paper.
I’m sitting here grinning, thinking about his reaction. I can just imagine the look on his face; that smile with a glint in his eyes. I need to stop thinking about him.
Tonight, the flat is quiet and I’m enjoying the time to myself. I’m not sure where Dani is. She might actually be working. My phone buzzes on the sofa beside me, unknown caller ID. I’m just about to ignore it when I realise it might be Ryan, he did say he would text.
“Hello,” I say.
“Ellie!” The way he says my name gives me a deep ache and weakens my senses. “Sorry, I meant to message you earlier, but the day has gotten away with me. How are you?” He sounds tired, and maybe even distracted.
“I’m good, just reflecting on how much I achieved today.”
“Should I be scared?” he asks, laughing lightly.
“No, not at all. I learned so much about you today.”
“What did you learn?”
I laugh. “That there is so much more to you than the arrogant, cocky git I’ve had the misfortune of meeting.”
“You don’t mince your words, do you?”
“No. Usually I say whatever is on my mind.”
“That’s not such a bad thing.”
“No, it’s not. I hope you don’t mind but I’ve arranged to be with Claire and some of the families tomorrow?”
“Oh, she never mentioned it. That’s fine. It will be good for you to see and talk to some of the parents and kids.”
“I know…” My voice trails off and I hope I don’t get too caught up in everything, although given my background with my own mum, I’m not sure I’ll be able to switch off and pretend this is just any other assignment. Because it’s not.
“Ellie? Are you still there?”
“Yes, sorry.”
“You do that a lot. Just drift off, or do you have something on your mind?”
“I’m a reporter, what do you think? Now, is there anything else I can do for you?” I tease, but my body sags in relief because I know I’ve just gotten myself out of any awkward conversations for the time being.
“Oh, Ellie… I can help you out with a story, if only you’d let me show you…”
“I think it’s time our conversation ends before this goes any further.”
He laughs, and I smile because I’m imagining the cocky grin on his face. “You win. We’ll say goodnight, and hopefully I’ll be able to join you with the kids tomorrow.”
“That would be nice. Goodnight, Ryan.” I end our call because I have a feeling that if I didn’t, it would lead to endless flirting and then I’ll not want to face him. Or worse, I’d plead with him to come here because I’m desperate to see him. No. That can’t happen.
Never in my wildest dreams did I think Claire and the other staff would do so much for these kids. It’s been a fun-filled morning at a small local farm. Seeing some of their faces light up and being able to touch the animals. Some of the kids even helped muck out. Claire’s aim is to give these kids some experiences they normally wouldn’t get within their family situation or school environment.
My emotions have been all over the place as I’ve watched on the interactions of the kids. Sadness fills me when I think about my own childhood, but I feel a certain amount of gratitude towards Claire and her staff for what they do for ensuring these kids don’t go through what I went through.
We’re now back at the track and the kids are sitting in the stands, eating burgers and drinking juice. To see and hear them you really wouldn’t know they had such a difficult home life. I’m sitting on my own, writing down a few notes about my morning. I’d like to pitch it to Frank and Les that I do a diary style weekly report on what the charity is doing. I want to help. I have the ability to highlight what is a horrendous situation. I shiver as, again, my own thoughts resurface. My mother’s gaunt face is all I see. I close my eyes and take a few deep breaths but it doesn’t help. My eyes fill with tears and my heart races.
Dear God, how I wish things could’ve been so different. For her and for me.
“Ellie, we’re going to take the kids trackside.” I open my eyes to Claire’s voice. “Hey, are you okay?” Her eyes search my face and she sits down beside me.
“Yes, I’m fine.”
She tilts h
er head to the side, her eyebrows raised, and I can tell she knows I’m not. “Fine, means you’re not. I get that all this is emotional.”
“It’s not that. Well, it is, but…”
“I’m a good listener,” she says softly, taking my hand.
“Thank you,” I say with a heavy sigh. “I’m not sure it’s something I’m ready to talk about.”
“I understand. Just know I’m here if you change your mind. Now, come on. The kids are excited. Ryan and Dylan are here with some of the others from his team. I believe they’re going to have some sort of competition for the kids. He’s not done anything like this before. I think he’s setting out to impress a certain someone.” She winks at me.
“I have no idea what you mean.” I brush her off with a shake of my head and a flush in my cheeks.
“You tell yourself that. He’s hardly been able to take his eyes off you since he arrived. None of us have seen him look so… different. His behaviour, it’s nice. Ryan has taken quite a fancy to you, and tell me if I’ve got my wires crossed, but I think the feeling is mutual.”
“I have a job to do and I’ll stay professional.”
“We’ll see how long that lasts. You won’t be the first to fall for his charms, but you may well be the first that has claimed his attention.”
Claire takes to the stairs and I wait a minute to gather my belongings before following her and the noise of excited kids down to the track.
I want to focus on what Dylan is telling the kids, and I’m trying to. He’s telling them they will be split into two teams and will be kart-racing. But my eyes are on the man standing at the side whose deep brown eyes are on me. He looks comfortable and so casual as his crisp white t-shirt clings to his body, and I can see the rise and fall of his chest with every breath he takes. It’s almost hypnotising.
Claire is right, and if she’s worked out that I’m attracted to him, I’m sure everyone else has too, including the man himself. Crap.
He’s standing tall and confident, and even somewhat cocky as he curls his mouth into a smile. I melt. And I’m pretty sure he knows it. Damn body. Here was me trying to stay professional.
Collision: A Driven World Novel (The Driven World) Page 7
