He was mad and confused, but in a way, he could see why his mom had done it. He paced the back patio for a few minutes, letting himself calm down and try to figure out how to reassure her while still wanting to cuss her out. Stopping, he sank into a plush patio chair and put his head between his hands. Everything was crashing in on him—Josh being hurt, Lily hating him, his mom lying but not being as sick as he thought. Of the three, he’d take this news. Even though it made him mad, it was actually good news.
Finally, he reentered the house. His mom was where he’d left her, kind of slumped down in a barstool. She straightened when she saw him. Hyde sat down and stared at her, waiting for her to fill the gaps in for him.
“I’m an awful mother, Hyde. I’ve been holding you back.” She sniffled and then grasped his hands tightly. “Thank you for reminding me that you wouldn’t desert me. You’re a great son to me, even when I’ve done something unacceptable. I was an emotional wreck after your dad left and I was diagnosed, but I’m doing okay now. I’m finally coming to grips with everything. It’s time you live your life. Go play ball as long as you want to. Date Lily. I won’t hold you back anymore.”
“So you’re really going to be okay?” He was still struggling to wrap his mind around this news.
“Yes, and when I really do degenerate, you can hire somebody to take care of me. Please don’t tie yourself down because of this awful illness. Will you promise me that?”
It was a complete one-eighty. Hyde wasn’t sure what to think. He would always be there for his mom, but for this moment her day-to-day care wasn’t as crucial as he’d feared. “Thank you, Mom.”
She nodded tightly.
Hyde had a sudden thought. “Does Allie know?”
“She’s suspected.”
“She’s going to be ticked when you tell her.”
His mom grimaced. “Isn’t it enough that I told you?”
“No! You have to make this right. With Allie and with Lily and her family.” Hyde was reeling at the implications. His mom was sick, but she wasn’t out of it like he’d feared. In fact, she was really with it to orchestrate something like this. It was crazy news and he was upset, but more than anything, he was relieved. His mom wasn’t gone mentally. Not yet, at least.
“Okay, I’ll do it.” She blew out a breath and gave him a brave smile.
Hyde stood and tugged his mom up, enfolding her in his arms. “Mom, I feel like I’ve got you back. I can’t believe you’d pretend to be out of it when all I’ve been wanting is my mom.” He was sniffling at tears again. If his teammates saw him tonight, they would kick him off the team.
His mom hugged him tightly. “You mean you’ve felt deserted too?”
“Dad was gone and you were like this shell of you, and it’s been miserable.” He gently shook her. “Don’t ever do something like this to me again.”
She laughed, but it slid away quickly. “Eventually I will be out of it, Hyde. It’s scary to know you’re going to lose your mind.”
He exhaled. “I can’t imagine. But I’ll be here, and we’ll keep working with the best doctors and doing all we can to keep you here as long as possible. I love you, Momma.”
“I love you so much.” She cried quietly.
Hyde held her close, and though tonight was one of the hardest of his life, he felt relief in knowing his mom was still here with him.
Chapter 19
Lily returned from the bathroom and peeked around the corner at her family. Hyde wasn’t with them. She sighed in relief, though part of her wished he would fight for her, for them—but no, he’d left. It was better that way.
Her family was in the waiting room with rollaway beds, piles of blankets and pillows, and a table full of food and drinks that her mom was sharing with an older couple, praying for news about their son-in-law, who’d had an accident involving a parasail. The only person from her family who was eating was Brandon. He could eat almost as much as Josh. Oh, Josh.
Lily bit her lip to stay under control and approached her mom. “Did they say when we could see him?”
“Caleb’s in there right now,” she said. “Do you want to go next?”
“Yes, please.”
Her mom’s mouth twisted like she was trying to give a reassuring smile, but it looked more like she’d just eaten an onion and couldn’t get the bitter taste out of her mouth. “Just buzz in at the door and tell them who you’re visiting. Only one of you can go in at a time.”
“Okay. Where did all of this come from?”
Her mom shrugged. “Some blonde girl just kept bringing stuff in. She asked how we knew Hyde. Said he gave her money.”
Hyde did this. It was so him. Even though he’d left, he wanted to take care of them, and it made her miss him all over again. The way he always took such good care of her …
“Honey.” Her mom wrapped a concerned arm around her.
It felt so much like being a child, and Lily would’ve appreciated the comfort, but she couldn’t handle her mom’s thoughts about Hyde right now.
“None of this is Hyde’s fault,” her mom said.
Lily had no response to that, even though it was semi-true. A lot of blame lay with Ike, Teresa, and even Lily for bringing Hyde into her family’s lives and giving Josh this dream that ultimately crushed him.
“I’m going to see Josh.” She shrugged out of her mom’s hold, turned, and hurried to the intensive care door. She’d have to apologize to her mom later, but she couldn’t think about Hyde right now. She was already on edge and didn’t need another explosion.
The nurse buzzed her through and told her to wait outside Josh’s door. She could see Caleb bent over their little brother’s bed.
“Let him stay as long as he wants,” she told the petite nurse, who looked to be close to her mom’s age. “I’ll wait.”
“Okay. When he comes out you can go in.”
“Is Josh going to be okay?”
The nurse elevated one shoulder and shook her head. Her curly brown hair bounced. “His vitals are really good, honey. It’s hard to say with brain injuries, though. Sometimes they wake up as soon as we ease off the barbiturates, but sometimes … they never come around.”
Lily recoiled. She didn’t want that kind of truth. The nurse walked away without trying to remedy what she’d said or comfort Lily. It was for the best. Nobody could comfort her right now.
Caleb turned as if he sensed her watching him through the small window on the door. His face was streaked with tears, his dark hair tousled. He turned back to Josh and squeezed his little arm, then walked to the door and slipped out.
Lily grabbed him in a fierce hug. She couldn’t stop the tears flowing or the vain reassurances. “He’s going to be okay. He’s going to be okay,” she kept repeating as she rocked him back and forth.
Caleb sniffled and clung to her. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t pull away, so she simply rocked him in her arms like he was a little boy. Being eight years older than him, she remembered how cute and tough he’d been as a little boy. He’d never let her hold him like this; that was for sure.
He broke from the hug and wiped at his face. “Thanks, sis,” he muttered, then walked toward the double doors and punched through them. The poor kid. Lily wished she could do more for him, but there were no words of comfort that would help. Only Josh waking up would cure this pain. And if he didn’t … Well, then she’d have to pray her guts out that Caleb could someday forgive himself and they could all survive without their little sunshine boy.
She squared her shoulders and pushed the door open. There were monitors beeping, oxygen whooshing, and hoses snaking everywhere. Josh had a tube down his throat, an IV coming out of his left arm, and monitors attached to his bare chest. His face and abdomen had a grayish-white tinge like dirty snow.
Lily forced herself to look over his body. He was a thickset kid, but he was only eight and he looked so small in that crisp, white bed. His chest looked okay, rising and falling under the power of the machine, but t
here were a lot of small scrapes on his face and arms. Had the airbag exploded on his bare skin?
Lily focused in on his face. She’d never seen Josh so lifeless. It was worse than seeing her grandparents in their coffins and realizing they’d never hug her again. Would Josh ever give her another mischievous smile and throw a football to her? Would he ever slam into her and knock her over with his exuberant hugs?
She sank into the chair next to the bed, reaching for his fingers and squeezing, praying, aching for a response—any slight movement would do. She always loved the feel of his slightly chubby fingers grasping hers. For the first time that she could remember, he didn’t squeeze her hand back, and he didn’t open his eyes and give her that toothy grin that always made her day.
It was impossible to wipe the tears away, so she just let them come. Her body shook from the pressure of those tears. “Oh, Josh,” she whimpered. She tried to swallow down the tears, but there were too many. “Please, Josh,” she sobbed out. “Please come back to us.”
He just lay there, the mechanical breathing device so robotic and un-lifelike that she couldn’t stop crying. The only response to her pleas was the soft beep, beep, beep signaling the rhythm of his heartbeat.
Lily buried her head into the soft skin of Josh’s shoulder and focused on his heartbeat. At least she had that. She thanked the Lord for that steady beat and begged him for more. She begged to have her Josh back.
* * *
Lily thought breaking up with Hyde and being without him had created the worst two days of her life, but last night topped it. She’d lost Hyde, and now she thought she was going to lose Josh. How could she possibly survive?
She tried to sleep on a cot but tossed and turned too much, and finally, around five a.m. she returned to Josh’s room. She knew seeing him like this was ripping her heart out, but being in his presence was somehow reassuring as well. She’d take whatever she could get.
The same dark-haired nurse from last night buzzed her through. She’d heard one of them say they did twelve-hour shifts that changed at seven.
“You’ll have to wait until the gentleman is through,” the nurse said.
Lily stared at her. She’d left her family in the waiting room. She doubted any of them were sleeping any more than she was, but her dad had finally forced her mom to lie down. Her mom had seemed pretty strong for the first few hours, but as time progressed and Josh still didn’t respond, she’d neared hysteria. Lily wished Hyde would come and bribe some doctor to drug her mom or something. No mother should ever go through this kind of anguish. Yet she didn’t want Hyde here, and no one else had the power to throw their money and influence around to help people like he did.
“What gentleman?” she asked the nurse.
“Don’t act like you don’t know.” The nurse winked at her. “The two of you were all over my Twitter feed a few days ago.”
Lily closed her eyes. Please, not Hyde. She hadn’t had enough sleep to deal with him again. If she yelled at him like she had last night, maybe some smart medical person would try to medicate her.
She wanted to spin on her heel and march back out of intensive care until he left, but it ticked her off to no end that he’d come back. He wasn’t family. He didn’t deserve to be in there with her little brother. She stormed to the door.
“You’ll have to wait,” the nurse called out. “No kissing on that good-looking man until you’re outside the unit.”
Lily almost spun around and cussed the nurse out. Because she’d kissed a famous person, the nurse thought she had some right to tease her about it. She didn’t know Lily or Hyde or their unfixable situation. There would be no kissing, ever again. That was sad, but Lily would have to deal with that loss, as she didn’t know how she’d forgive Hyde for his part in Josh’s accident. No matter that he didn’t intend for any harm to come to Josh; the long night of no sleep hadn’t helped her disposition or inclination to forgive him, at all.
She paused outside Josh’s door and stared through the little window. Josh seemed to have a little more pink tinge to his skin today, and the ventilator tube was gone. Sadly, that just made the cuts more visible, but that meant he was doing better, right?
Hyde was bent over the bed. His wide shoulders were shaking. She could only see the silhouette of his face, but it was impossible to miss the tears streaming down, dripping erratically off his chin as he clung to Josh’s hand.
Lily stared, and a lump formed in her throat. It was good that Hyde felt sorrow for what had happened to Josh, but she wasn’t ready to share her sorrow with him. Even if the accident hadn’t happened, their relationship was more than over, and she didn’t need him connecting with her family—especially not with her little brother who idolized him.
Lily watched them without moving, hardly daring to breathe too loud. She felt like she was intruding on a personal moment, and that made her mad too. Dang it, Hyde. Why did he have to break her heart? Why did Josh have to get hurt? Tears stung at her eyelids. She blinked quickly, sick and tired of crying, but seeing Josh lying there motionless and Hyde sobbing was more than she could take.
Turning on her heel, she hurried away from the doorway. She needed to get a grip or she might fling herself into Hyde’s arms, desperate for the comfort and reassurance only he could offer.
Chapter 20
Hyde hadn’t been able to sleep and was back at the hospital by four-thirty in the morning. The nurse at the ICU desk was more than happy to let him in, explaining that she knew he had a connection to this family and she was sure those magazines had made things look bad, but he and Lily were the perfect couple. She went on and on, somehow knowing that he’d helped Lily’s family last night with blankets, pillows, and food, and saying how sweet it was that he was here for his girlfriend’s little brother.
His girlfriend? Maybe two days ago. Not anymore. He ached for Lily. Man, that made him a lonely loser.
He thanked the nurse and entered Josh’s room. His feet stopped a foot away from the bed, and he couldn’t clear his dry throat. Josh. The energetic little boy was horribly still. Hyde always thought hospital beds were small, but this one seemed big, too big for Josh. He was hooked to an IV and had a tube in his chest, but besides that and the scrapes on his face, he looked like he was sleeping peacefully. Those cuts and scratches about killed Hyde. He sank into the chair by Josh’s bed and took the little man’s hand in his own. His hand was soft and small. Hyde squeezed his hand and waited, but there was no response.
He prayed aloud, “Please, Lord. This boy is so innocent and good. Please bring him back to his family.” The prayer released a torrent of emotion. Josh nonresponsive. Lily hating him. The rest of her family so understanding and loving. His own mom pretending she was out of it so he wouldn’t desert her. His dad deserting both of them.
Tears leaked out, and before he could rein it in, the emotion overtook him and his shoulders were trembling. He swallowed and blinked and chewed on his cheek, but couldn’t get himself under control.
Clinging to Josh’s hand, he was at least thankful no one could see him. He was Hyde Metcalf: famous, strong, and well-loved football player. He didn’t cry. He especially didn’t lose control. He prided himself on his self-control, on and off the field.
His eyes roved over Josh’s motionless frame again. But this was Josh, his little buddy who idolized him and made him feel like he was cooler than he was.
Who cared that he was Hyde Metcalf when there was nothing he could do to bring Josh back?
“Please, Josh,” he whispered through the ache in his throat. “Please, come back. Lily needs you. Your family needs you. I need you.”
He bowed his head and let the tears fall. If he was going to have a breakdown, maybe it was better just to let it all out and be done with it. This moment was horrible, and he realized that it might not end. Josh might not awaken, and someday, much sooner than he wanted, his mom would be in a hospital bed, not knowing her own son.
“H-hyde?” Josh coughed and then squeezed
his hand back. “Why are you … crying?”
Hyde shot up straight in the chair. “Josh? Oh, Josh!” He reached down and hugged his little buddy. “You’re awake!”
“Are you mad at me, Hyde?”
“Am I mad … at you?” Hyde scrubbed at his face. Relief and happiness poured through him. Josh was awake and he was talking to him. He should find Lily. Then he remembered that Lily hated him and would probably never forgive him. He should at least get Lily and Josh’s mom.
“My throat hurts.” Josh coughed again. “Could I have some water?”
There was a little sink with cups next to it. Hyde filled one up quickly, then pushed the button to raise Josh’s bed and helped him bring it to his lips. He was awake, but obviously weak and tired.
“Thanks,” Josh said. “I’m sorry, Hyde.”
“Why are you sorry?” This cute kid was too much. He’d just awakened from a coma and he was apologizing to Hyde? Shouldn’t nurses be coming in here or something? But one look at Josh’s vitals showed they hadn’t changed much. Maybe they didn’t know he was awake.
“I told that guy about how nice you were to me and how you gave me all kinds of cool stuff and the tour of the stadium. I didn’t know he was a reporter. I don’t know why he printed that mean article about you and Lily.”
Hyde smiled sadly. He’d lost Lily over that article, but maybe it would’ve happened inevitably. Maybe they just weren’t meant to be together. It definitely wasn’t Josh’s fault.
He reached up and ruffled Josh’s hair. “Oh, buddy. That was that reporter’s mistake, not yours. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“But your mom said you didn’t want me and Caleb to come over anymore. I heard that she called Lily a money-grabber.”
Cami’s Georgia Patriots Romance Collection Page 14
