by K. Walker
We drove in silence to school, and my heart thumped in my chest as I imagined the reaction I would get from the other students when they saw me getting out of Chad’s car.
It was just my luck that Callie pulled into the parking lot right behind Chad, like she had been waiting for him.
“This is going to be fun,” I said sarcastically and positioned myself to get out of the car.
“Hey,” he said and tapped my shoulder. I turned and he gave me a quick kiss. “Don’t worry about anything. You’re my girl now.”
I couldn’t help the smile that came to my lips as I slid out of the car. He skipped around to my side and threw his arm over my shoulder. “Hey, Zeke, Brody,” he called and fist bumped his boys as they approached.
“I was going to ask, but I see where you ran off to last night,” Brody said and winked at me.
I pursed my lips as I felt the blush rising in my cheeks. The bell rang then and we walked off. I could feel Callie’s eyes gouging out the back of my head, but what did she matter anyway? I was with Chad. I rocked into him for show, just because I knew she was looking.
Several eyes turned when we entered the hallway. Lockers slammed and gasps rippled throughout the space. Chad had his arm around me for the entire time, and the look on Amanda’s face when she saw us was priceless.
She pointed behind me with her chin and I knew Callie was coming.
“Chad, I see you picked up the poor girl. How generous of you.” She sneered.
I sucked in a deep breath. We didn’t need to answer her. I was already his girl and that was victory enough. I was not biting at what she had to offer.
Chad, however, wasn’t taking it easy. “Say that again!” he dared her. “Call her poor girl one more time.”
I turned and Callie’s face was red. “This is what you dumped me for?”
“No, Callie. I dumped you months ago because you were a joke,” he spat and turned back around again. “Ready, babe?”
“Yeah,” I chirped and gloated as he put his arm around me again and we walked off to class.
“She’s going to have your ass,” Alexi laughed as she bumped into my free arm, giggling and doubling over.
“Be careful she doesn’t get you just for laughing,” I warned and giggled too.
“Let her try,” Alexi cackled.
It felt so good hearing Chad put her in her place. She could do nothing to him. He was one of the untouchables and as long as I was with him, I would be too.
Senior year was only one year after all – it would all be over soon. I expected Callie to be on my back for the rest of the day, but she just stared at me from across the cafeteria during lunch.
“Where’s your hot stud?” Liz asked and bit her straw.
“I don’t know.” I smiled and leaned forward. “Maybe the same place your hot stud is.”
“Ugh! You two are going to make me sick,” Amanda groaned.
I laughed. “I think we need to get her a man.”
“No, thank you. I’m good,” she replied and looked away.
“Wait, what was that?” I asked as I saw her cheeks coloring. “OMG! She already does.”
“What? What!” Alexi exclaimed. “That dude from the party?”
Amanda blushed. “No. He’s not my boyfriend. We haven’t gone out or anything. It was just that one time…and then last night,” she confessed as she covered her face.
We burst into a fit of laughter. “You slut!” Stacey chipped in.
“Sue me! Everyone at this damn table is getting some,” she said as she squinted and pointed her straw at us. “I needed some too.”
“Got that right,” Alexi said and slurped her drink. “But anyway, ladies, I gotta go.” She slipped out from under the table and grabbed her bag. “Later, bitches.”
You couldn’t help but love Alexi – she was as plain as day and not easily fazed by anyone. She was her own woman and I was impressed by it.
The loud talking across the room told the entire cafeteria Chad was around. I glanced over at him and smiled. He came right across the room, took my face by my chin, and planted a kiss on my lips.
“Hey there, beautiful.”
“Hey, yourself,” I replied when I caught my breath.
“Want to go to the beach after school? I want to show you something.”
“Sure.”
“Okay. Catch you later. Got to go do something with the guys.”
He gave me a kiss and walked off, and I was left beaming like a star.
“OMG, he’s crazy about you.” Amanda gawked. “I’ve never seen him like that. Usually he’s a jerk, no offense.”
I watched him walk off with the rest of group and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “Oh, none taken. I’ve seen that side of him, too.”
“He’s dreamy,” Stacey gushed as she watched him walk away. “I would envy you if you weren’t my friend.”
I laughed. “I’ll take that as a compliment.” The bell rang and we got up. I was headed for the door when someone bumped into me so hard that I lost my balance and fell.
My elbow connected with the floor and I yelped as the pain shot up my arm. I spun and skittered on the floor as I tried to get a handle on what had happened. Callie was standing over me, a scowl on her face.
“You don’t belong here, trash!” she sneered with one of her hands planted on her hip.
That was it! I twisted my body and did a scissor cut with my legs, swiping her feet from under her. Her arms flailed and she clawed at the air as she fell hard on the ground. I pounced and landed over her, my fingers pressing down against her throat.
“Fight! Fight!” the room chanted, and I knew I was inches away from trouble.
“This is the last time, Callie,” I warned as I rose. “Next time, I won’t take it easy. Back off!”
“Break it up!” the security guard shouted as he hurried across the room. By the time he made it over, I was already gone.
“That was awesome!” one girl giggled as she passed me.
“Serves her right,” another behind me claimed. “She’s such a bitch.”
“Wonder if she’ll be at school tomorrow? That was so embarrassing.”
“Wonder if she takes karate?”
The whispers continued all the way to class and I was glad when school ended and Chad met me outside the class.
“Ready?”
“More than,” I replied and took his hand. “Meet you later,” I shouted over my shoulder to Amanda.
“Yeah, I’m right behind you.”
“I heard about your little fight today,” he said as he squeezed my hand. “You might need to teach me a move or two.”
“Whatever, Chad,” I laughed. “Let me wash up first,” I said when I saw the restroom.
“Sure. I’ll be out here.”
“What do you mean you don’t care?” someone was asking. I didn’t see anyone when I entered the bathroom, but there was someone in there. “Mom, she could have…but she wasn’t…Mom!” It didn’t take me long to realize it was Callie. I thought about getting out before she came out of the stall, but she wasn’t going to dictate what I did or didn’t do.
“You can’t be serious.” Pause. “Fine! I’ll ask Uncle Travis. He’s like the only one who cares anyway. Pause. “You don’t give a shit about me. Go ahead. Go do your nails. You’re such a bitch!”
I was paralyzed by this time, even if I had actually wanted to leave. She started to whimper and I took that as my cue. She was crying, and based on what I had heard before, she didn’t have a good relationship with her mother. No wonder she was so mad all the time.
I changed my mind about staying and got out as quickly as I could. I saw Zoe and Paris rushing to the bathroom when I got out.
“What’s going on in there?” Chad asked as I hurried out.
“Callie meltdown,” I whispered.
“Oh. Wonder what caused that,” he drawled sarcastically.
“She caused it for being such a snob and a bitch.”
Still, I felt bad about it. That feeling passed when we arrived at the beach. I smelled the salty air and felt the gentle sea breeze as it caressed my face. “Nothing like the beach,” I said, more to myself than to him.
I planned on relaxing on a beach chair while he and the guys surfed. I was surprised when he took two boards out of his trunk.
“Who’s that for?” I asked.
“You,” he told me and walked on ahead.
I remained in the same place. “Me? Chad, I told you I don’t surf anymore.”
“Yes, you do.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. “I’m not going into that water.” It had been a while since I had been that terrified. I felt safe as long as I didn’t need to go into the deep murky blue. It held my demons, and I wasn’t yet over them.
He walked slowly back to me. “I know it was hard losing your friend, but you cannot never go back into the water again. I’ve seen the way you look – the longing in your eyes.”
“But…” I sighed.
“Do you actually think this is what your friend would want you do— to blame yourself, to never surf again?” he asked.
I leaned a hand on my hip and looked at him. “No, of course not.” I shifted my gaze to my feet in the sand and then whispered, “I’m not ready, Chad.”
“Yes, you are,” he murmured and held out his hand to me. “Don’t make me throw you over my shoulder again.”
I laughed. “I would kill you.” I gazed past him at the briny blue, and my heart tugged. I loved to surf, but the fear was still too real.
“I’m not leaving here until you go in there with me.”
“Not yet, Chad.” I could feel the tears start to well. I couldn’t control my emotions.
His eyes softened, and he stopped asking. “Okay. But one day, you’re going in with me.”
“I know.” I smiled and parked my ass in a chair and watched them ride the waves with ease. I couldn’t help but picture myself and Rachel and the other girls out there. Free and alive. Doing what we loved. As I looked up I swear I saw Rachel on a surf board smiling at me. Then I heard her say, “Get back on your board, Soph. Do it for me, please.”
I felt someone touch my arm and it was Chad looking down at me. He was soaking wet and the water was pooling around his feet in the sand.
“Babe. Wake up.” he said. I shielded my eyes from the sun and looked up at him and smiled. It was just a dream but one that was happy and not scary anymore like the others. I think it was sign.
Two weeks had passed and he wouldn’t get off my back, until finally I caved. He was relentless, and I was nervous as hell as I put the bikini in my bag – I had actually gone out to buy a couple of new pairs. That alone had been a major step for me.
“All set, babe?” he asked as I slipped into his car and kissed him.
“As ready as I’m ever going to be,” I replied and heaved a sigh. I was still a nervous wreck, and he saw and touched my hand.
“It’s going to be all right,” he said. “This is what Rachel would want, not you sitting on the beach afraid.”
I smiled to myself, knowing he was right.
It was a Saturday, so the beach was full. No surprise there, but it only made me more nervous.
“Ready?” he asked.
“Nope,” I replied honestly. My ears rang, and the noise around me drowned out the beating of my heart. Rachel still hovered, her fingers pointing at me, and my entire body shook. I was distraught.
Chad pulled me to his side and kissed my forehead. “Nothing to be afraid of but your mind, princess. I’ll be right there with you.”
I nodded profusely as I tried to blink back the ghost that haunted me. I stepped into the water and it lapped around my ankles, like it was trying to trap me. I started hyperventilating, and I looked back at the shore – my safe place.
“Come on,” Chad coaxed through the confusion in my head.
I closed my eyes and breathed deeply. “Okay.”
I inched further away from the shore, my legs shaking the entire time. The water clawed at me, pulling me closer to the reef. I climbed onto the board after we passed the break and paddled out to the waves.
“How does this feel?” Chad asked his grin becoming wider.
I looked around, unable to believe I was actually back in the water. I did it! “Feels good,” I replied with a smile. “But maybe I should just float here for a bit.”
“Okay,” he said with understanding.
I watched him go out, climb the waves and ride them like a pro. They called to me, and I slowly inched closer, until I was surfing right next to him. I couldn’t help but revel in the feeling of letting everything go and just be free like Rachel and I used to do. It was overwhelming.
As soon as I caught a wave, I was home again. I didn’t want to get out of the water. I surfed for two hours, until my skin started to shrivel. I was laughing when I finally made it to shore again.
“I can’t believe I did that,” I said as I looked back at the waves.
“I knew you could,” Chad said. “Now, let’s go eat.”
I went surfing with him and the guys over the next couple of days, spending as much time as we could in the ocean. I had forgotten how much I loved the water, and he had helped me overcome my fear. I didn’t see the scary Rachel anymore, but I did see a happy one smiling down on me and carried her in a better place now.
I guess the ocean was my therapy and I couldn’t have been more grateful that my senior year was off to an epic start.
Chapter 21
I was expecting his call in the morning to tell me he was outside. Since we became an item, he hadn’t allowed me to drive my car anywhere he would be. He either sent someone or he took me. Chad wanted everyone to know I was taken care of and not to mess with me.
I was ready and standing by the window, knowing he should be out there already, except he wasn’t. “What the hell. That’s strange,” I said to myself.
I took my phone from my pocket and dialed his number. There was no answer. I checked the time – I had only fifteen minutes before I would be late. I sighed and grabbed my purse. I kept calling him on the way, hoping he hadn’t gotten drunk and overslept. Or had a late night out racing or some other crap he might have done with the guys.
His phone kept ringing without an answer. I was beginning to panic by the time I got to school. Except when I did, his Audi was there.
“What the hell?” I said to myself as I parked and got out of my car.
I scanned the parking lot and saw him and the guys by the trees outside the main building. He was wearing his letterman jacket and saw me coming straight for him. He looked me in my eye, but he didn’t return my smile.
My heart sank. Something was wrong. Really wrong.
“I’ll catch up with you later,” he told them and walked off just before I got to him.
“Chad?” I called after him.
“Later, Sophia,” he said without turning.
I looked at them, but none of them could look at me. “What the hell is going on?”
“What do you mean?” Deven asked and rubbed his neck. “He said later.”
I squinted my eyes and walked off. That wasn’t the Chad I had come to know. I took out my phone.
Sophia: Babe, what’s going on? Why didn’t you come get me? And what was that just now?
I kept looking at the phone for an answer, but none came. I was nervous and anxious by the time the bell rang for first period.
“Hey, earth to Sophia,” Amanda snapped her fingers in front of my face and shook me.
I snapped awake. “Oh. Sorry.”
“What’s up?”
“I don’t know,” I told her. I really didn’t. Chad was acting weird and I was worried he had gotten himself in trouble and he didn’t want me finding out. I checked my phone again.
Still no reply.
Nothing!
I was distracted for the entire day, especially when he didn’t show up for lunch. Callie was w
ith her girls, and she eyed me with a grin that had my mind whirling. She looked like she had just won the damn lottery.
“Something’s up,” I told the girls. “Chad is acting weird, and Callie keeps looking at me like she’s expecting something to happen.”
They glanced over at the table one by one. “You sure?” Alexi asked. “They look like their usual bitchy selves.”
“Maybe it’s just my imagination,” I mused.
But I couldn’t shake it off, and I had good instincts. I had to speak with Chad – had to get to the bottom of it. He couldn’t hide from me forever.
It was just my luck that as soon as I exited my last class and headed towards the locker, I saw him. He was leaning against his, and a girl was standing right in front of him, her face beaming. His hand was on her hip.
I froze in my spot, not believing what I was looking at.
“Chad? What the fuck is going on?”
He turned and looked at me with eyes I didn’t recognize. “What?”
His question shocked me. I narrowed my eyes. “What is this? Who is this?”
He chuckled. “What does it look like?”
My heart raced as hurt and anger swirled inside me. “I don’t know. You tell me.”
“Sophia, it’s over.” He wore a blank expression on his face and showed no emotion. I blinked rapidly, unable to understand what was going on. “What? Did you think it would last forever? You thought you were special? Maybe, if you were the only girl around.”
“Why are you saying this? Just last night…”
“It was all a show, Sophia! Jeez! You really thought you could get me to settle down? Me? Chad Minor?”
“But…” I kept insisting. “You said…”
“I said lots of things. Anything I had to,” he said coldly as he bore down on me. “You made it easy,” he hissed in my ear and returned to the anxious girl.
I looked around nervously as anxious eyes found me. I heard the words coming out of his lips, but they didn’t make sense. Tears stung my eyes as I watched him slip his hand around the girl, like he used to do with me.
They walked off, and I stood in the hallway as hot tears ran down my cheeks, and the snickers around me turned into laughter.
