***
We all piled into my mom’s car while Uncle Ron drove us to the requiem on Saturday. We didn’t speak; nor listen to the radio as we drove to the funeral parlor. I watched the scenery pass by as if I were stuck in a nightmare and couldn’t awaken. When we walked into the funeral parlor, I sat quietly in the back row and watched strangers walk in and fill the room. Most of them said the same thing – they shook my hand and offered their condolences to my father. I’m your dad’s friend from high school. We used to be very close. Your dad said so many good things about you. I bet you’re dad would be proud of you, and so on, and so on.
I could only muster a thank you, but I don’t recall a single one of them ever coming to house to pay a visit when my dad was sick. I hoped these people didn’t come to the funeral because they thought my dad had left them a little something from his estate. If they only knew. The medical bills wiped out our assets. We had no estate, only the woes of bankruptcy.
I forced myself to stand and walk to the coffin in front of the room. The closer I approached the casket, the more tears flowed from my eyes and ran down my cheeks. Once I made it to the coffin, I peered down at my father. Although he looked at peace, the cancer ate away his body leaving him dried out like a desiccated prune wearing a suit.
Although we haven’t been to church in years, the minister was nice enough to come and read a eulogy.
I’m not sure how and when I came home, but I just lay on my bed. Then my uncle came into my room, and sat down on the corner of the bed, just like my dad used to do.
“I don’t think I have to tell you, but your mom needs you?”
“I know.”
“So, what are your plans?”
“I think it’s best to return to college.”
“Have you thought about staying? Perhaps find a job.”
I looked away and stared at the wall.
“There are plenty of good jobs here.”
I turned to look at my uncle, “Where?”
“Ah, well. Yeah, I think the lumber store is hiring.”
“Yeah great. I stayed in this town two years after graduation – nothing. This town has nothing for me.”
“It has your mother.”
I looked away.
“Someone needs to take care of your mom.”
I looked at my uncle, “Will you stay with my mom?”
“Yes, of course. But it’s more than that.”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re the man of the house.”
I looked away again and mumbled, “I see.”
“Just think it over.” Then he rose and left the room. He slowly closed the door as not to make a sound.
Don’t get me wrong. I don’t mind staying and get that job at the lumber store, but I don’t fill right staying in this house. Although I lived here all my life, I feel I no longer belong here anymore. I feel like I’m staying at a stranger’s house.
I picked up my phone to check my messages. Nada. Phaedra didn’t bother to call or text. Well, it’s looks like no loves me up there at the university.
The next morning, I rose, showered, dressed, and packed my suitcases before my uncle and mom woke up.
I tiptoed downstairs and avoided the spots where the floor creaked, but as soon as I stepped on one, I stayed there a minute to let the board settle before continuing.
I left a note on the kitchen table – Mom, sorry. But I must return to college. I also have some money left over from my financial aid. I’ll send you more if you need it. Love you. Jax. I pulled out two thousand dollars and placed it on the table next to the note. I grabbed an empty coffee mug from the cupboard and placed it on top of the money.
I walked out the front door. Reaching the street, I turned around and looked at the house. I no longer belong here anymore. Then I headed to the bus station.
Paying for College - The Novel Page 24
