by A. B. Medley
“That’s so awesome Dean, really.” The waitress drops off our burgers and fries and chocolate shakes. We always ordered our shakes with our food, so they’re just soft enough when we’re done eating. “Are you thinking about it? Coming home, I mean?”
He looks at me with a guarded expression. “I have been. That’s why I took the whole week off. Just wanted to test out how it felt to be home for more than a day or two at a time. And maybe check out apartments, keeping my options open.”
We finish eating. “What about you? Are you staying in Camden Springs? Or are you entertaining coming back home?” That catches me by surprise. I don’t know how to answer.
“To be honest, I didn’t think I could ever come back. Too much happened before I left. I just needed a different life. But my mom has been begging me to come back. She says Jake Boyd would love me to work with him here. After being here the last several days, I don’t know what I want anymore. But for now, I’m here, same as you, for Thanksgiving, and staying a little longer because we’re throwing my dad a surprise retirement party next Friday.”
“Come to think of it, I think I saw an invitation at my parent’s house for that. So, your dad’s retiring, huh?” he asks curiously. “Yeah, he finally decided it was time. Hey, you should come to the party if you’re off that day. It’s at Paris Hall. And it’s formal.” I laugh, flicking my eyes to his.
“That sounds like it could be fun. I think I can swing that,” he says.
I look up at him from my shake. “You always did like a good party.” I can’t help but laugh out loud at him. He shakes his head and laughs with me.
“There’s a lot that has changed about me over the years, Ivie. I’m better than I used to be. Speaking of, I feel like I should apologize for the way I was at the end.”
I wave my hand in the air to dismiss the rest of what he’s saying. “There’s no need Dean, really. That was so long ago. We were still kids.”
“That may be, but I still haven’t found anyone that makes me feel the way you did.” His eyes stare right into mine, and I have no clue what to say. So I say nothing.
“Are you seeing anyone?” he asks. My food is going to come back up. I smile and swallow it down.
“I’m not exactly sure how to answer that,” I reply honestly.
His eyebrows slam together. “What does that mean?”
“It’s, well, it’s complicated.” That’s the truth. This is not a conversation we should be having.
He puts his hand on mine on the table. “If it’s that complicated, maybe it’s not right.” I give him another small smile and pull my hands into my lap.
My phone suddenly dings. Thank goodness for small favors. I pull it out and see a message from my dad.
Hey pumpkin, do you mind running by my office? Need your help.
I look up at Dean. “That’s my dad. He needs me to run by his office. I’m sorry, but I have to go.”
Dean smiles. “Let me just pay for our lunch, and I’ll walk you out to your Jeep.”
I reach into my purse for my wallet. “That’s not necessary Dean, I’ve got mine.” His hand closes over mine again.
“Please Ivie, it’s my treat.” He gets up and heads to the cash register.
I go ahead and step outside into the cool air. After a few minutes, he’s standing beside me. I start to shiver with the wind whipping around me. He puts his arm around my shoulders and brings me to his side as we walk to my Jeep.
“It was good catching up, V. I’d like to try to see you again this week if we can manage it. But if not, I’ll try to come to the party for your dad next week.” As we reach my Jeep, he turns me around to face him and pulls me in close. He looks from my eyes to my lips. For a moment, I think he’s going to kiss me. Instead, he kisses my forehead and lets me go.
I smile at him. “It was nice catching up, Dean. Sounds like I’ll see you around.” He smiles back at me and opens my Jeep door for me. I get in, and he shuts it before walking to his truck.
What in the world just happened? Dean is acting interested in me again. If it was complicated before, it just got worse. Someone please save me from the heartbreak I’m sure is coming.
My phone dings again. Blocked.
Don’t think Sterling will like knowing Dean wants you back. Or that he was that close to you. Don’t worry, he’ll find out. Maybe Dean will find out about you and Sterling too. Then you may lose them both.
I lock my phone and feel my head start to ache.
I look at the pictures on my desk. My beautiful wife and my beautiful daughter. The most important people in the world to me. These threats I keep getting—I truly don’t know who is doing this to me and my family. But I’m pretty sure I know why.
I’m not a perfect man. But I’m an honorable one. I’ve always tried to right my wrongs. But some can’t be rewritten. I do have one secret that haunts me. I don’t know how I should feel about it, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings. I don’t know if it’s better kept hidden, or if it’s better to own up to it.
It’s not just about me. I don’t want to disappoint my family. I know if I ever tell them, or they find out, it’ll change everything forever.
Ella, my receptionist, buzzes my phone. “Detective Brigg is here to see you.” I close my eyes. He’s good at his job. Maybe a little too good. He’s circling what I’m hiding.
“Send him in, Ella. My daughter is on her way here too, just send her in when she arrives.” She responds, “Yes, sir.”
My door opens, and Sterling walks in. “Judge Davis.” He nods at me.
“Please just call me Rhett, have a seat.” I wave my hand to the seat across from me. “What can I do for you today, Detective?”
He pins his eyes on me. I can sense he’s close to what I hope I won’t have to tell. Closer than before. His stare would intimidate a lesser man, but not me. I’ve stared down some of the worst criminals society has to offer in my courtroom over the years.
“I wanted to ask about Steve McCree.” He doesn’t give away what he’s thinking.
“Okay, what about him?”
“I paid him a visit. The sentence he received from you seemed a little harsher than normal, given his clean record and it being his first offense. I asked him why he thinks he got that sentence, and he said I should ask you. So here I am— asking you.”
I take a moment to collect my thoughts. “The two charges that night were his first, you’re correct. To be quite honest, I was harsher, hoping it would teach him a lesson.”
Sterling’s eyes narrow. “What lesson would that be exactly?” Before anything else is said, Ivie walks in.
“Hey Daddy. I was just…” She’s dropping her phone in her purse before stopping in her tracks upon seeing Sterling. We both stand.
“Hey pumpkin. I’m sorry I didn’t realize Detective Brigg needed to see me when I asked you to come.”
“Oh, okay. Should I come back later?” I round the desk to give her a hug. “No, that’s okay. I was just going to talk to you about surprising your mom with something on Thanksgiving, but we can talk about it later.”
Sterling chimes in. “We were about done anyway. I’d like you to narrow down anyone you’ve been in close competition with over the years, though, if you don’t mind, out of the list you gave me. We may have been looking at these threats from the wrong angle.”
I smile tightly at him. “I can do that. I’ll work on it and get it to you.”
Sterling heads toward the door. “I’ll be in touch.” He stops and looks at Ivie before walking out.
That boy has feelings for my daughter. I knew he did all those years ago. Part of me wishes she could stay here and try to have something real with him; he’s a good guy. But I don’t want her in danger because of me. My family has been in the spotlight in this town for years.
“Since he left, do you want to talk about that surprise for Mom?” Ivie grins at me.
“Sure baby, sit down.” She does and we start talking about our famil
y Thanksgiving and what I’m hoping to add to it for my wife.
I ran by the station and filled in Trudeau and checked on some other cases. After a couple of hours, I went back home. I needed to get some of this frustration worked out. I changed into some old, tattered jeans and a long-sleeved gray T-shirt then threw on my favorite ball cap and my barn boots.
First I went to the barn and helped Tate feed the horses and cows. After we fixed part of the fence at the back of the property, it was getting dark. We head back to the barn, and at the fence I see a blonde-headed woman. I squint to see and about the time I realize who it is, so does Tate.
“Well, I’ll be damned if it isn’t Briella Brigg,” he yells at her, laughing.
She hooks her legs on the wooden fence and takes a bow. I walk up to her, Tate on my heels. “What’s up, sis?”
“Just studying and learning how to be better than you.” She sits back on the fence. I swat at her, and she pushes my arm away, laughing.
“For real, Mom sent me with the groceries for Thanksgiving. She said she and Dad are coming here and cooking instead of cooking at their house. I personally think Dad just wants time to check up on you and this is his reason to do that without saying he’s doing that.” She winks.
Just then I see Ivie’s Jeep headed up the drive. “Are you expecting someone?” Briella asks.
“Not tonight, but that’s Ivie.” She gasps and throws a hand over her heart.
“No way! The Ivie?” she looks at me, wide-eyed but grinning wickedly. Tate snorts out a laugh. I shoot them both a look meant to silence them.
“Yes Briella, one and the same.”
She’s still smiling but more serious this time. “What’s going on, Sterling? She’s been gone for years.” Tate looks at me, waiting for an answer. Briella notices the exchange of looks. “Tate knows what’s going on but I don’t? That’s cold, big brother.” She jumps down on our side of the fence.
About that time, Ivie makes it to us. “Hey, Ivie. You remember my little sister, Briella. And of course, Tate.”
Ivie smiles at them both. “I do. Nice to see you again.” She looks at me, and my heart races. Damn this woman and my heart.
“Can I talk to you, Sterling?” she asks.
I climb over the fence to where she’s standing. “Yeah, let me go in and wash up.”
I look back at Tate and Briella. “You already get the groceries in?”
Briella immediately smiles and says, “Sterling, you know I did. I don’t need a man to help.”
I roll my eyes at her. “I’m going in with Ivie, then.”
Briella speaks up before I can walk off. “I’m going to hang out here with Tate and catch up.” I cringe, knowing she’s going to extract every bit of information Tate has to offer.
We get in the house, and I kick my boots off at the door. I go to the kitchen sink and wash my hands before turning to her. “What’s going on, baby girl?”
Her eyes go straight to mine in an instant, and I can see a hint of humor and a tiny bit of fire.
“I thought I told you about calling me girl.” She rolls her eyes but smiles. “Dad wanted me to give this to you, said it was what you asked him to get together for you.” She hands me a flash drive.
I take it and put it in my pocket. “Thanks, I’ll get right on it.” She stands there looking me up and down. I feel heat stirring through my blood. “Can I get you anything? A drink?”
She just stares at me intensely. “No, I’m good. I wanted to talk to you.”
I cross my arms over my chest, and my stomach flips. Is she going to fess up about lunch with Dean today? Do I want to hear this? I haven’t heard from Dean since last night. He made his intentions clear, but I didn’t.
“Okay, what do you want to talk about?” I ask around the dread settling in my gut.
She takes a deep breath. “I had lunch with Dean today. It was…weird.” And there it is.
“You did?” I ask, as if I didn’t already know. “Why’d you do that?”
Her brows slam together. “We were close a long time ago. I haven’t seen him in years. You already know that. It was just us…catching up.”
I feel anger coursing through my veins. “So you say.” I can feel the muscles working in my jaw.
“Sterling, why would I lie to you? You know my secrets.” She closes the distance to where I’m leaning on the counter. She reaches out to put her hand on my face, but I turn away.
She pulls back like I burned her. “Don’t do that, Sterling.” I didn’t mean to react that way. I’m just so angry and jealous, even a little scared. I don’t want her near Dean. I want her with me. I want him to know that she’s mine.
“Do what, Ivie? I don’t know how I’m supposed to react to you spending time with your ex-boyfriend. If there’s a certain way I need to act about this, please tell me.”
She bites her bottom lip like she does when she gets nervous. “He asked me if I was seeing anyone. I didn’t know how to answer him. What are we doing? Are we a thing? Was the other night a fling?”
I blow out a frustrated breath. “What did you tell him?” She looks at me, wide-eyed. “Nothing. I told him things were complicated. Because that’s how they feel right now. That’s all I said. I didn’t want to assume this was something it might not be without talking to you.”
I lift my cap and run my hand through my hair. “Ivie, what do you want from me? He’s been my best friend for years. None of us are kids in high school anymore, and I thought you knew how I felt. But if it’s complicated, I don’t know what to tell you.”
She backs up. “What are you saying, Sterling?”
“I’m saying I think you know how I feel about you, and if you don’t, you should. I’m saying I can’t tell you how to feel or what to do. You’re the only one who knows what you want and how you feel. But I can tell you this.” I walk right up to her and grab her hand and put it flat on my chest over my heart. “This, my heart, belongs to you. And only you. It has for a long time now.”
She lets a tear fall down her cheek as her fingers splay on my chest, feeling my heartbeat underneath. “And Ivie, I didn’t fight for you before. I stood on the sidelines and let you go. I can’t do that again. I won’t. My heart can’t take it. Having you back here made me realize that. So, whatever you’re going to do or decide, don’t wait too long. I can’t handle not knowing where we stand.” I brush a kiss over her lips and wipe away her silent tears. “I’m getting in the shower. You can stay, or if you need to leave, I understand.” I walk away and leave her in my kitchen speechless.
I stand in his kitchen, stunned, and touch my lips where he just kissed me. I love Sterling. I always have. I start to walk to the door and stop, looking toward the hall he went down. My heart is beating so fast I think it’s going to pop out of my chest.
I follow the sound of running water, and I can see steam coming from the en suite of his bedroom. I make a split-second decision, and quickly strip my clothes off and open the bathroom door further. I can see his outline through the frosted glass.
I open the shower door and slide in behind him. He has his head down, with the water pouring over him. His eyes are cast to the floor. I come up and press my bare breasts into his back, needing to feel his skin against mine.
“What are you doing, Ivie?”
I slide around and up in front of him so I can see his face. The water wets my hair down my back. He hasn’t looked at me yet. I take his face in my hands while he tries to avoid my eyes. “Look at me, Sterling.” I feel the tears start to run down my face, mixed with the water running over both of us.
“I love you. I’ve loved you for a long time. I’m just so scared, because I never thought I’d get to be with you like this. After all that happened back then, everything that was lost, I didn’t let myself believe I could be happy. I thought I had to protect you—and everyone else. I thought if I left, the threats would disappear, but I was wrong. I should’ve stayed and fought for you. For us.”
H
e pins me with his eyes so hard I can’t tell what he’s thinking, but I feel like he can see through to my soul. “Ivie, I love you so much it hurts.” He wraps his hand in my hair and pulls my head back while he stares in my eyes before kissing my lips. He trails kisses down my jaw and neck and runs his other hand from between my breasts to my neck while pushing me into the wall.
He kisses me again, pushing his tongue into my mouth, dancing with mine. I reach between us and stroke his length. He groans against my mouth, then flips me around, my hands flying to the wall. He runs his hand down my breast gently, caressing, and finally slides it further down between my legs. He rubs delicate circles in the most sensitive spot before sliding his fingers in. I let out a moan that sounds foreign even to me. He kisses my neck and then whispers in my ear, “Baby girl, you’re killing me.”
He removes his fingers then replaces them with his full length, filling me up in the most delicious way possible. He slides in and out while keeping me stimulated with his fingers. In just a few moments, I feel the pressure building between my legs. “Sterling, I’m almost there.”
He moves faster. “Me, too, baby girl. Let go for me.” I finally do, contracting around him and feel him pulse inside me just a beat or two later. I stretch up so I’m flush with his body and throw my head back on his shoulder. He pulls out and grabs my chin, running a kiss over my neck and up to my lips once more, a deep kiss that stops the air from moving in my lungs.
We get out of the shower and dry off. “Can you stay tonight?” he asks.
I run my hand up his chest and to his face pulling him to me for another kiss. “I don’t want to be anywhere else.”
We hear laughter coming from the living room, and I feel a flush run up my neck. He chuckles and wraps a towel around his waist. He walks to his bedroom and locks the door. “You’re safe to come out now.”
I step into his bedroom and grab my clothes and put them back on. “Is that Tate and Briella in there?” He grins. “Yep. And be prepared. They’ll probably give us hell when we walk out there.”
