by A. B. Medley
Me: Yeah, that’s fine. You can come by the house.
A few minutes later I hear the rumble of a truck engine pulling up and cutting off. He must’ve been close. I go to the front door and let him in.
I take in his worried eyes. “Hey. Is everything okay?”
He follows me to the kitchen and I grab two bottles of water, one for me and one for him. He takes the water. “Thanks.” He opens the water and takes a sip. “I’m fine. I just wanted to see you again. I’ve been thinking a lot more about staying here. I may take a little more time off to think about it.” His eyes search mine, though I’m not sure for what.
“That’s great if that’s what you want, Dean. After all, Greendale Valley is home.”
“I’m starting to think there’s a lot I miss about home. Like you.” He walks to where I’m standing against the counter. He’s so close I can feel the heat coming off his body. My pulse starts to hammer. Oh crap. This isn’t supposed to be happening.
“I’ve missed you too, Dean, but missing me can’t be a deciding factor in your future.” He rubs his thumb across my bottom lip before placing his hand on the side of my face in a caress. His eyes flick from mine to my mouth. This time I know he has every intention of kissing me.
Before I can speak or move, he brings his lips down over mine, running his tongue over my lip before parting them and touching my tongue with his. I gasp and push my hand against his hard chest. “Dean, we can’t do this.”
He pulls back from me. “Why not? I’ve always loved you, Ivie. I want to be in your life again. We used to have something good.”
I inwardly wince at his words. “We did, Dean, but that was high school. You were my first love. My first…everything. You’ll always be special to me, but we aren’t there anymore. It’s been years.”
“I know that, V. I’m asking for a chance to be in your life now. I’m a much better person than I used to be. There were a lot of things I’m not proud of from back then. I’ve grown up. Can you just think about it? Don’t write me off, please. I don’t want to pressure you. I just want you in my life and the chance to prove I’m the person, the man, you always thought I was.”
My lower lip trembles as I fight tears. “Dean, please don’t do this. I know you’re a good man. I never doubted that. I never would.”
He looks at me like I doused him in gasoline and lit him on fire. I can see pain and anger, maybe even regret in his eyes. “Ivie. I’m just going to come out and ask. Are you seeing Sterling? Is that what you meant by ‘it’s complicated?’ I’m not stupid. The few times I’ve seen you with him this week I could sense something more than what you both said. I know he’s working on a case with you—a personal one. But is it more than that?”
I close my eyes a little too long as a single tear drops, and it tells him what he needs to know. “Damn it, Ivie. Sterling! Really?” He shakes his head and then drops it.
“Dean, look at me. I—” He cuts me off before I can explain the past, and now the present.
He looks back up with determination. “You can still think about this. Don’t answer now. I didn’t always do the right thing with you back then. But damn it, Ivie, I’m not going to just give up. You mean too much to me. Seeing you again just made it that much clearer.”
He steps so close to me I can see his pupils dilate. He drops his head and brushes a quick kiss over my lips once more. “Don’t count me out, V. May the best man win.” He takes his bottle of water and goes out the front door.
Dean Warren just declared war against Sterling for my heart.
My phone beeps again.
Unknown number: I knew you couldn’t pick. I guess I’ll have to help, or maybe I’ll take them both.
Attached are two pictures, one of Sterling kissing me on his front porch. The other is of Dean kissing me just now. I drop my phone on the floor and look out the window to where someone was clearly looking in and watching me. I run to the front door and lock it then go around and check all the windows and other doors before arming the security system. My hair stands on the back of my neck and my skin prickles with chill bumps. What am I going to do? If Sterling sees that picture, he’ll hate me. He’ll think I want Dean back. He’ll think I lied to him about my feelings.
Fear builds up in my chest and it’s hard to breathe. I pick my phone up and go to my bedroom. I lay back down and the tears start to flow. Beep.
Sterling: I love you baby girl. I wish you were here with me.
I choke out a sob.
Me: So do I, love. I love you too.
How is it Sterling always knows when to touch me? Whether it be in person or this way. My heart is not up for grabs; it’s where I left it a long time ago. It’s in Sterling’s hands—and at the outlook where I lost our baby.
After tossing and turning all night, I’m up and showered, sitting in the kitchen in my parent’s house, sipping black coffee. I need something strong today. Mom and Dad won’t be back for a few more days. Almost just in time for the party. How am I going to tell Sterling that I let Dean come here last night—like a fool—and then he kissed me? I close my eyes and let the warmth from the coffee flood through me. It’s time to call in the big guns. This is delicate, and I need advice—advice I haven’t asked for in a long time.
I take out my phone and pull up Lucy’s number, then hit send. She answers on the second ring. “Hey, honey, what’s up?” I smile at her voice. She’s always had my back. I’ve missed her so much.
“Hey Lucy. I need some advice—advice I think only you can give. Come over and have brunch with me?” I smile even though she can’t see me.
“I’m so in. Do you have anything to make mimosas?” I walk over to the fridge and look. “I do have orange juice but not champagne.” I tell her. “Can you pick some up on your way?” She squeals in my ear, making me wince a little.
“Of course, I can! Is there anything else I need to bring?”
“No, I think I have everything else covered.” I tell her. We hang up after she tells me she’ll be here in about twenty minutes.
I use that time to get started cooking. I cook bacon and scrambled eggs with chocolate chip pancakes. I cut up strawberries for our mimosas and to just eat too. Strawberries are my favorite fruit.
By the time I’m finishing up, I hear a knock at the door. I wipe my hands on a towel and go open it. Lucy’s standing there in black yoga pants and an oversized white hoodie with her brown hair twisted into a messy bun on top of her head. Her green eyes, so like mine, are twinkling with mischief.
“Come on in. I’ve got everything ready. We just need to whip up the mimosas.” She walks with me into the kitchen, setting down a bottle of champagne.
“Okay, babe. Are you going to tell me what’s going on before we eat or after?” she asks as she helps me make the mimosas.
“How about we eat first then we can sip away on our drinks while we talk.” I grin at her.
“That’s fine with me, because it smells like heaven in here right now.” She grabs the plate I had laid out for her and piles food on it. We eat our brunch and then take our mimosas into the living room and sit on the couch.
“So, spill it. What has you needing advice right now? I’m beyond curious. We haven’t had a girl talk like this in a while.” Her eyes are glued to mine.
I let out breath, figuring out where to start. “You know me better than anyone. I have a lot to tell you—a lot I’ve kept from you, some big things actually.” I hang my head. “In order for you to give me advice, I need to tell you all of it.” A tear escapes but I let it fall freely. I need to feel this and talk about it.
Lucy reaches over and puts her hand over mine. “Hey, whatever it is, I’m here, Ivie. You know that. I don’t care how long we’ve been apart in distance. I’ve always had you with me in my heart. I’ll always have your back. You’re my best friend, and you can tell me anything.”
I swipe the tears out from under my eyes. “I know you do. And I hope you know I’ll always have yours too.”
I let a few more tears fall.
“I’m sorry I’m crying like this, it’s just I haven’t told anyone. Sterling finally knows everything now, and I’m ashamed to say that if it wasn’t for this case he’s working with me, he still wouldn’t know.”
She tucks my hair behind my ear. “I’m listening, Ivie. Just start from the beginning.”
I take a deep breath and give her a small smile. “Sterling and I, we sort of got together while we were still here in high school. It was while Dean was in the hospital. You were right, you always are. You asked me before the party that day if something was up with me and Sterling. There was, at least emotionally. But we had never acted on that or spoken it out loud until one night after Dean was attacked. He was still unconscious, and I was scared and upset. Sterling was with me, and he was comforting me. One thing led to another and well, you know.”
She looks at me, a little stunned but grinning. “I knew it!” she crows triumphantly.
“Yeah, you were right. We both felt terrible, but it confirmed what we’d been dancing around, the fact that we had feelings for each other. I was already trying to figure out how to end things with Dean before any of that happened, though. He’d slipped away from me. I could feel it. But with Sterling being his best friend, we had to be careful. There was no good way for us to be together without someone getting hurt. Then, before I could even wrap my head around that situation, I started being threatened.”
Lucy’s eyebrows furrowed and her lips pinched. “What do you mean threatened?”
“I started getting messages. At first, I didn’t know if they were real or someone’s idea of a sick joke. I was threatened to stay away from Sterling unless I wanted him to end up like Dean or worse basically. I listened and backed away. The threats and messages stopped. By that time, I had another issue.”
“What in the hell could be more of an issue, Ivie?” I could see fire burning in her eyes.
“I figured out I was pregnant.”
Lucy’s hand flew over her mouth. “You were pregnant? Was it Sterling’s or Dean’s?”
“It was Sterling’s.” I let the tears fall freely and close my eyes. “This is the first time for me to talk about the baby with someone that isn’t Sterling, and it feels good to tell someone.”
“How do you know it was his for sure?” she asks. I hadn’t told her much about me and Dean at that time.
“Dean and I hadn’t been together like that for months before Sterling and I were. There was no question. Anyway, I was meeting him at the outlook to tell him. He was mad at me for avoiding him, which I had only done trying to protect him. I got there before him, and you know the rest, basically. I was beaten and stabbed before Sterling got there. If he hadn’t pulled up when he did, I think I’d be dead right now.” I absently rub my shoulder where my scar is.
“Ivie, what happened to the baby?” she manages to whisper through her own unshed tears.
A sob escapes my lips as I bury my head in my hands. “I lost the baby because of the attack. So, whoever attacked me murdered my baby. Mine and Sterling’s baby.” Lucy scoots over to me and pulls me into a tight hug. I can feel her chest shaking with sobs too. When we both calm down, she pulls back to look at me.
I wipe my face and blow out a breath. “I never told Sterling, and I graduated early and left, thinking it would draw danger away from here—from everyone I love.”
“Oh honey, I wish you would’ve told me all this then. I can’t believe you went through all of that alone. Does he know now?”
I nod at her. “He does, and he was very upset. He didn’t find out from me. I’m being threatened again,” I admit.
Her eyes went wide. “You’re what?” she shrieks.
“That’s a big reason I’m back. Not just to help with Dad’s surprise retirement party but to figure this out finally. We still don’t know who attacked me and Dean. We’re following every lead we have.”
Lucy sits there with a growing inferno behind her green eyes. There’s some other emotion on her face, but I can’t quite make it out. “Okay, so are what are you needing advice on now?”
“I’ve let myself fall for him again, Lucy. I never stopped loving him. I just tried to move on the best way I knew how, and now it’s all blowing up in my face again. We’ve gotten closer the last few weeks, and he feels the same about me. We’re going to give this a real shot this time.”
Lucy blinks waiting for more. “So, what’s the problem? I understand you’re trying to figure out who’s behind this, but I guess I’m missing where you need advice. It seems like you have what you want figured out. And I’m so happy for you, by the way.” She smiles genuinely.
“The problem is Dean’s back. He’s thinking about staying. For now, I’m staying. I’ve got to see where things take me with Sterling. But with Dean here, it makes things complicated. We’re just trying to make a go of this, but we don’t want to flaunt our relationship in front of him.”
“I get that. First loves and all, and of course Sterling being his best friend all his life. But are you sure Dean would care? I mean that was years ago. We’ve all grown up and started leading our own lives.”
“Trust me Lucy, he cares. He came here last night telling me he cares, and he knows about me and Sterling having feelings for each other. And he says he’s going to fight for me.”
Lucy sits in silence for a few minutes. “Wow. I see the dilemma. What are you going to do? Does he know about the past with Sterling and…the baby?”
“No, he doesn’t know any of that. I hope he doesn’t ever have to know. Even though that was years ago, it would still be a huge betrayal. I don’t want to hurt him. I don’t want to destroy his friendship with Sterling. That would be like me losing you, Lucy. He’s a good man. I want him to be happy, it just can’t be with me.”
“I’m sure Sterling knows where you stand, right? He doesn’t strike me as the type to give up on you. And I’m sure he wants to save his friendship with Dean, as well. He wouldn’t tell him about the past, would he?”
“No, he’d never hurt Dean that way. In fact, Sterling is still hurting himself since finding out about the baby. It’s not that I’m worried about. These threats I’m getting again, this person knows things about me that no one else should know. It’s like they know things about everyone in my life. I don’t want them to tell Dean. If he ever found out it, would need to be from me or Sterling—not some stalker with an axe to grind with me and my family.”
“I see now why you need advice. Honey, that’s a hard one. Sometimes things are better staying hidden. The truth can be too much, too painful—too life changing.” She stares at me with sadness.
I touch her hand this time. “Lucy, are you okay? Is there something you need to tell me?” She snaps out of it.
“’Course not, honey. I’m just saying the truth doesn’t always set you free. I’d have to wait and hope that this psycho never decides to tell that truth to Dean, but that’s just me.”
I nod, agreeing with her and hoping she’s right. Then I continue with the other question I have for her. “Dean kissed me last night, and this stalker knows. They took a picture outside of my house and sent it to me, making sure I knew that they could tell Sterling. I don’t want to muddy the waters here. So, should I tell Sterling he kissed me, or just pray they don’t act on that threat? It didn’t mean anything, and I didn’t kiss him back. I pushed him away and told him that couldn’t happen. I don’t want to make Sterling doubt he can trust me right out of the gate, and I sure don’t want to add more strain on Sterling and Dean’s friendship. What am I supposed to do?”
“Oh, babe, that’s a tough one. I’d say if you think this bitch—let’s call them a bitch, shall we?— would tell him, then you need to tell him yourself. I’m sure he’d understand. It’s not worth risking the trust you have and are building.”
I take both of her hands in mine. “You’re right, Lucy. This is why I love you. Always my voice of reason.”
I smile at her. �
��I’m really thinking about staying. Not just for Sterling and me, but for everyone I love, including you. I miss you. I think I’ve been on the run long enough.” I smile at her.
“I’m so glad to hear that, Ivie. I’ve missed you too. So much.” I reach across and give her a hug.
“Hey, how about you come hang out with me and Sterling tonight. If he’s going to be my man, he needs to get to know my best friend better.”
She blushes a little. “Yeah, if you don’t mind a third wheel, that sounds like fun.”
“You wouldn’t exactly be a third wheel. His sister Briella’s been there for a few days and so has Tate.”
She crinkles her nose a little. “Who’s Tate?”
“You remember him, don’t you? He was always around town in the summers. He helped on their farm growing up—their families are very close. He’s like their brother. He lives in a cabin and runs the farm while Sterling works. Who knows, you might hit it off with him.” I wink at her.
Lucy rolls her eyes. “I’m not looking to hit it off with anyone. I have my own crap to deal with.”
“Such as? I just told you all my most hidden secrets. You know I’m here for you, right?”
“I do know that, Ivie. I’m just not ready to talk about things—to anyone. I’m sure you understand that. I mean, you waited years to tell me what you just told me. I’ll tell you when I can.”
“When you’re ready, I’ll be here. Now let me check in with Sterling about tonight, and we can just hang out and drink these divine mimosas for a while.” I smile at her and send Sterling a text about tonight, feeling a lot better than I have in days.
It’s a little after lunch when I get the text.
Ivie: Hey handsome. I was wondering if we could hang out tonight? And do you mind if Lucy comes?
