Daverex opened his eyes.
Shadow sighed and said, “When the time comes, close your eyes and concentrate on a place you have been before. A few moments later, you and anyone else touching the stone will be transported instantaneously to that place. Just don't close your eyes and concentrate on the inside of a volcano or something equally stupid and I think you will find it indispensable. If you skip it across anything, though, I will personally kill you. Got it?”
Daverex nodded his head and placed the stone in a secure pocket on his environmental suit. “What is to be done about Benny?”
“Recharging your robot will take time that you don't have. We'll take care of him. Don't worry. If you're successful, we'll even add some nice upgrades I'm sure you'll find useful. I'm sending Aegis and Fracas with you to watch your back and to keep an eye on your progress. Fracas is a mixed martial artist whose already mighty blows get even stronger the more he is attacked. Aegis is literally a human shield. He can take a licking and keep on ticking. Both are quite skilled with assault weapons as well. I think they will prove to be more than adequate stand-ins for your robot for the duration of this mission. Of course, you will also be surveilled outside of the cave, so limited backup will be available there should the need arise. There will be no communication between us during the mission, however. Any communication device can be hacked and traced back to the location of our hidden camp. There are, of course, powerful organizations eager to see our camp destroyed. Secrecy is our strongest defense. Enough jabbering. Get going, and may the luck of the ancients be with you!” Before Daverex could utter another word, Shadow and BeN-E were somehow shot upward at blinding speed toward the tops of the mighty redwood trees.
Daverex had a lot more questions for Shadow. He was especially anxious to explore this camp of hers, which he assumed was hidden among the tops of the redwood trees. The mission to retrieve the idol, however, was time sensitive and he could understand the need to prove his loyalty to Shadow, if indeed she was telling the truth. There was always the possibility Daverex was being maneuvered like a pawn in a chess match, but he was willing to play the game for now.
Daverex started towards the woods' exit, but when Aegis and Fracas began following close behind, he turned around and said, “You guys should stay here until I get back. You stick out like sore thumbs and where I'm going, you two won't exactly be welcome. The twins hesitantly looked at each other, then back at Daverex and offered quick nods in unison. Daverex turned back around and soon cleared the woods, then he headed towards his old familiar stomping grounds; the nearby sprawling Tech'er complex.
When Daverex's security badge was scanned by one of the guards patrolling the perimeter of the complex, a loud warning beep emitted from the scanning device. The guard looked down at the device, read part of the readout on the display screen and then looked back up at Daverex and said, “You were outside of the complex past curfew.”
Daverex rolled his eyes at yet another oppressive rule enforced by the Tech'ers. “I am aware of that.”
“Well, Ms. Greene isn't. You'll have hell to pay with her.”
Daverex stifled a laugh, knowing that the real Ms. Greene was somewhere deep within a cave on another planet in another universe of all places. “I'll take my chances. Thanks for the warning. Can I go in now?”
The guard looked back down at the display and read the rest of the readout.
Daverex sighed as precious time ticked away.
Finally, the guard looked back up at Daverex and said, “It also says here you're marked for formal termination in the next fiscal quarter.”
Is nothing sacred? Daverex wondered to himself. He could see the look of concern on the guard's face through the clear visor on his helmet and said with a smile, “What can I say? I'm a troublemaker.”
“What you do inside the complex or beyond its borders is none of my business. Just don't make any trouble around me. You can head on in.”
“Great. Thanks! Have a wonderful day!” Daverex said. As he approached the entrance to the complex, he started whistling a happy tune.
Another guard walked up to the first guard and said, “I heard your scanner beep. What was it?”
“See that guy whistling up ahead?”
“Yeah. He seems way too happy for a Tech'er.”
“That's a dead man walking. Just got his formal termination order.”
“Wow. Kinda makes you wonder what the cafeteria puts in their food.”
“Whatever it is, I want some. This job is sucking the life out of me.”
“You'll get no argument from me.”
Daverex entered the complex and headed straight for Ms. Greene's office on the top floor of the Explosives Research and Development Division, offering only a curt “No time to talk!” to anyone who asked him how he was or where he had been for so long. With any number of ruthless parties also interested in procuring The Infertility Idol and his friends in real danger of being killed by them, time was now of the essence. He did not expect to find the first dead ringer this soon, but Ms. Greene's office seemed the most logical place to start. He could see from across the hall, directly through her huge office windows, that she was clearly not in her office. He knew a magnetic lock automatically triggered whenever she left her office, so gaining access on his own would be impossible.
Daverex went to Gaston's cubicle just to the left of where he was standing and quickly peeked inside. Seeing that no one was there, he made sure no one outside the cubicle could see him and quickly ducked inside. There was a waist-high filing cabinet with three drawers in the corner. Only the top drawer was locked. Daverex took a metal paperclip from the desk and reshaped it until it resembled a hair clip, then he inserted it into the lock. Using a trick he learned from Gaston during a night of heavy drinking, Daverex maneuvered the paperclip in various directions until eventually he heard a soft click and felt a slight vibration on his fingertips. The drawer was unlocked. He opened the drawer and saw that it was tightly packed with folders. He searched the folders inside (consisting largely of endless sheets of charts, graphs and assorted technobabble he could make no sense of) until he came across a thick one labeled 'CPHG-27 – Close Proximity Hand Grenade – Diagrams & Rough Sketches – 2118'. He grinned with satisfaction as he removed the folder and closed the drawer, hearing something role and bang against the drawer as he did so. Curious, he opened the drawer again and saw that it was a lose grenade rolling around! He thought this was insane until he remembered this was Gassy's cubicle, the man who once forgot he hid pressure-activated explosives under his pillow until moments before going to bed! He was a genius inventor, but he could also be paranoid and absent-minded at times, a truly deadly combination.
The round grenade was on its side and attached to a square base. Daverex figured it must have been jammed between tightly fitting folders and forgotten about, and then flipped onto its side when he lifted out the thickly packed folder. He thought it was just a non-working model designed only for show, or perhaps a conversation-starting paperweight, until he picked it up for a closer look at the label on the base. It read, 'CPHG-27 (Close Proximity Hand Grenade-Model Number 27) This weapon can be dropped as close as 5' (five feet) from its user without harming its user.' That is amazing!, Daverex thought. Then he read the next line and was even more amazed. '!!!WARNING!!! This is a WORKING GRENADE! To operate, twist the top half clockwise until it clicks three times, then drop or throw at desired target.' Daverex wasted no time in pocketing the handy little device. The he peered around the corner of the cubicle and, seeing that the coast was clear, he exited the cubicle.
Daverex made his way down the long hallway with a dozen or so cubicles on either side and then stopped at reception, just outside Ms. Greene's office. A petite, somewhat mousy woman named Gwenn Faraway manned the desk there, busily typing away, temporarily oblivious to Daverex's arrival. She was pretty, but did not know it, and she had a quiet crush on Daverex, which he did know. He stood in front of her desk, cleared his throat
and said, “Good afternoon, Gwenn.”
Gwenn looked up at Daverex, startled, knocking over a coffee cup full of pens and pencils with her elbow as she did so. “Daverex! Hi!” The flooring was soft, so she didn't even notice when the cup and writing utensils hit the floor. Daverex did, however. He tucked Gaston's folder under his left arm, knelt down and proceeded to pick up the writing utensils and place them back into the cup.
“Oh, you are such a gentleman, Daverex. Thank you. I'm such a klutz.”
“Not at all,” Daverex said, “You're just very dedicated to your work. I admire that.” He felt a pang of regret leading her on like this, but he had to get into Ms. Greene’s office and Gwenn was his only way in.
“Really? You're a very sweet gentleman.” Gwenn smiled awkwardly at Daverex.
Daverex replaced the mug full of writing utensils on her desk and smiled back warmly. “Can I ask one small favor of you, Gwenn?”
“A small favor? Of me?” Daverex could see she was starting to get flustered.
“Just a teeny-weeny wittle favor-eeny?” Daverex felt utterly ridiculous, but he knew how to push Gwenn's buttons and she ate this cutesy shit up like it was sweet honey.
She suddenly felt very calm. “Of course, anything for you.”
“I need to get into Ms. Greene's office.”
Gwenn started getting flustered again. “Ms. Greene isn't in at the mo-moment.”
Daverex closed his eyes and tried not to get frustrated. He opened them and said, “I know, dear. I need you to unlock her office door for me. Please. It's urgent.”
“Wha-what's the urgency?”
Daverex earlier envisioned this whole scenario exactly as it was now playing out and had already rehearsed what to say to get Gwenn to cooperate with little fuss. “Gwenn, my dear, I don't know how best to tell you this, so I'm just going to come right out with it. I'm scheduled for formal termination.”
“Oh my gosh! That's awful! When?”
Daverex put on his best puppy-dog-about-to-cry face and said, “Later this afternoon.” The time table may have been a bit exaggerated, but at least the formal termination bit was true.
Gwenn's mouth dropped and hung there for a few moments before she finally swallowed hard and said, “So soon?”
“I'm afraid so.” Daverex removed several papers from the folder he was carrying, held them up and fanned them out so that Gwenn could clearly see that they were genuine. He made sure to hide Gaston's signature at the bottom with his thumb, however. “If I can get these details I drew up for a new explosive device scanned onto Ms. Greene's computer, however, it should buy me quite a bit of time to actually build the thing and be granted a stay of formal termination.” Daverex flashed his most appealing smile at Gwenn.
Gwenn smiled back, but it quickly turned into a frown. Daverex started to worry, thinking she had suddenly caught onto his ruse and was going to report him to security. But then she said, “I don't know the password to unlock Ms. Greene's computer though.”
Daverex felt relieved that that was her only concern. “It's okay,” he said, “I'll figure it out.” Gwenn smiled again as she reached under her desk with her left hand and pushed a button. With a loud click, the door to Ms. Greene's office opened wide. Daverex held her right hand in his and kissed it, then said, “I owe you one.”
Gwenn blushed and said, “I intend to collect, Romeo. Quick like a bunny, now. I don't know when Ms. Greene will be back.”
Daverex dashed off into Ms. Greene's office, slid into her chair facing her computer and slapped down the folder he was carrying onto her desk. He opened the folder and fanned out the papers before waking up her computer. A moment later, a screen filled with kittens playing with yarn popped up with 'PASSWORD' and a blank white bar in the center. Kittens? Really?, Daverex thought as he also began to think of what the password could be.
Having no clue where to begin, he typed 'PASSWORD'.
The word turned red and a warning message popped up saying, 'You have four attempts left before lockout.'
Daverex was not expecting that.
He tried 'IluvKittens'
It turned red and 'You have three attempts left before lockout.' popped up.
He tried two variations of his previous attempt and when both turned red and he had only one attempt left before having to give up, he wondered what ever made him think he could do this. He stared at the final attempt warning as it seemed to mock him. He needed Gaston's help, he realized. But Gaston wasn't here. Hell, Gaston wasn't even in this universe right now.
Daverex closed his eyes against the immense pressure he was under and took several deep breaths, letting his mind go, letting his muscles relax. Soon, he even rose above the searing pain he felt in his leg, which was caused by a grazing bullet that struck him in the course of rescuing Brother Harvest. Then suddenly, he could see sparks in his closed eyes followed by the wavy, multi-colored surface of a human brain in hyperactivity. Then he could see the unusual spelling of an equally unusual word floating above the brain. He snorted, jerked his head forward and then blurted out, “Ha-ha-kjo'un Fnikk,” the word he saw in his momentary stupor. It was also what the dead ringers allegedly called themselves in their own ancient language. Something inside Daverex compelled him to type that word into the computer as the password. He wasted no time in doing so, fearing that he would forget it as quickly as it had come to him. Before he could press the ENTER key to send it, however, he was interrupted by Gwenn standing by the entrance and asking, “Everything okay in here? I saw you slumped forwards in the chair and heard you making strange noises.”
Daverex pushed the ENTER key and when the password he had typed in turned green, he looked at Gwenn, flashed a more awkward sort of smile this time and gave her the ‘thumbs up’ gesture. She smiled back, turned around to head back to her desk, then turned around again, giving Daverex a concerned look before heading back to her desk again.
The password Daverex had typed turned green and the screen of kittens playing with balls of yarn changed to a no-nonsense solid black background with bold white letters in the center that spelled out TECHER'S MAKE A BETTER TOMORROW, TODAY! A score of folder icons were laid out across the top of the screen. Daverex scanned half of them and then came across one that was labeled 'contest'. He double-clicked the mouse to open it. Inside was a journal file of the dead ringer's experiences in participating in their annual contest. Daverex looked over at Gwenn who was looking at him, and then he ran the nearby portable scanner over the pages of sketches and diagrams he brought in with him until Gwenn finally went back to her typing. The next time she got distracted could very well be the time she decided to get nosey and catch a glimpse of what Daverex was really doing on her boss's personal computer, so he quickly skimmed through the journal file until he found the section he was looking for with today's date typed in the corner. It told of the dead ringer's current destination, saying, I underestimated the target's abilities. He is uniquely adept, for a simple hominid. I should like very much to test his abilities further in the future. For now, however, I have decided to focus my efforts on what I have discovered to be the last known location of the artifact I seek; a makeshift civilization called ‘The Grove’.
“Bingo,” Daverex whispered moments before hearing Gwenn behind him say, “What are you doing?”
Daverex hastily closed the journal file and said rapidly, “I had a little trouble with the scanner, so I had to ahh...recalibrate the subroutine of umm...the...root matrix. Disconnect. Reboot. Yadda. Yadda. It's complicated, but, uh everything's perfectly all right now. I'm fine. Thank you. How are you?” When he saw Gwenn was about to object, he grasped her shoulders firmly and kissed her hard on the mouth, holding it there until her tension eased. Then he broke away from the kiss – her lips still stupidly puckered – and said, “Thanks for all your help. Really. You were fantastic...I gotta go.” And he ran off down the hall.
A moment later, Gwenn scooped up the sketches and diagrams Daverex left behind, shoved them into
the folder and called after Daverex, “You forgot your folder!” but he was already out of both sight and earshot. It would not be until much later that she noticed it was Gaston Melchor's signature on the papers and not Daverex Newell's.
CHAPTER FOUR
W ith great haste, Daverex headed back to where Aegis and Fracas were patiently waiting. When he got there, he removed two of the ten vials of pseudocarrion grease he kept on him for emergencies and handed one each to the twins. It was collected from a giant bird native to the planet Daverex had just come back from and was a natural antidote to the planet's deadly poisoned atmosphere.
“Remove your clothing and rub this grease all over your skin,” Daverex said, “I'll have to get the areas you can't reach.”
The twins looked at Daverex as though he were utterly insane.
“Until I can get my hands on more environmental suits like the one I'm wearing, the grease is your only option. And no, I won't lend my suit to either of you. It's my suit. I earned it.
The twins continued to look at Daverex the same way.
“Stop looking at me like that and just put the damn grease on already! Unless you want to die in agony the moment you step out of the portal.”
The twins reluctantly began rubbing the thick, foul-smelling grease into their skins.
“Hurry up! I found out where the first dead ringer is!” he told them excitedly. The two simply nodded in unison and then stared up at him.
“Don't you two ever say anything?” Daverex asked.
They both shook their heads no in unison and then opened their mouths to reveal that neither of them had a tongue.
Daverex cringed slightly and then took a closer look. He noticed there was no scarring around the area where the base of their tongues would be if either had one, which would have indicated a forced removal, so he said, “You both were born without tongues, weren't you?”
They both nodded in unison.
“That would have been a useful bit of information from Shadow. I'm really very sorry.”
Deadeye- Episode II Page 3
