by Ford, Mia
Why the hell was I still living with my parents? I asked myself that question every single day, usually multiple times, and I knew the answer to that question. It was like having a constant debate with myself.
“Ok,” I said. “I mean, I’ll ask him. When?”
“How about tomorrow night?”
“Sure, that sounds fine,” I replied.
“Great,” mom said closing the door behind her.
Lara burst out laughing her head off.
“What are you laughing about?” I asked.
“Your mom totally heard everything,” Lara said.
“We don’t know that.” I paused. “You think?”
“Probably,” Lara said. “And you are inviting Paul to dinner here? With the parents? That is a big step relationship move. Are you sure about this?”
“I don’t know,” I replied. “It’s too early, right?”
What the hell was I going to do? If I asked Paul to meet my parents, to have dinner at their house, I was giving him the idea that he and I were a thing, right? After all we’d experienced so far to me it felt right, but what about him? He was such a closed book. I loved that about him, it kept the mystery alive, which was so much fun, but I also wished he would be a bit more open about his feelings sometimes. It would make decisions like this so much easier.
“You seem to think I have all the answers,” Lara said. “I feel I’ve made it clear during the history of our friendship that I’m really not that smart.”
“You are so full of it,” I teased. Lara was one of the smartest people I knew. And she usually had great advice, but sometimes she liked to mess with me and withhold that advice.
“I’m going to order the pizza,” I said grabbing my phone.
I went to the website, ordered it, and scheduled it for delivery.
“Did you get the cheesy sticks?” Lara asked.
“Of course. I would never forget such a thing,” I joked.
“Good,” Lara said. “Now what were we talking about?”
“Really?”
Lara smiled widely and winked at me. “Just messing with you. So, the thing with Paul—I think it’s silly for you to hide your feelings, but that’s up to you. And go ahead and invite him to the dinner. Tell him it was your mom’s idea and make it sound really casual and low key.
“If I tell him it was her idea then it makes it sound like I’ve been talking to my mom about it. Doesn’t that sound lame?”
“Oh, for God’s sakes,” Lara said.
Without warning she grabbed my phone and started texting.
“What are you doing?” I asked reaching for my phone.
Lara turned her back and finished texting. Then she gave me back the phone.
“What the hell?” I asked.
“There, it’s done,” Lara cheered obviously feeling so proud of herself.
“You are insane,” I said but I couldn’t help the laughter escaping me and honestly I did feel less pressure now that it was done. It was out of my hands. I couldn’t take it back. Paul would respond the way he would respond.
“That is how it’s done,” Lara said. “When there is something hard to do the best thing is to just do it without thinking and get it over with. That’s how I’ve always lived my life, which is why my life is so awesome.”
“Your life is about the same as mine,” I reminded her.
“Yeah. It’s awesome,” Lara laughed. “It’s pretty boring really, but I’m awesome enough to keep it interesting.”
I shook my head.
“Did your mom ever have you tested? The ideas that bounce around inside your brain are enough to make anyone crazy.”
“Oh, those are just the ideas I tell you about. You don’t know about the others,” Lara teased.
My phone vibrated just then.
It was text from Paul.
“Sure, that sounds fun. I’ll see you tomorrow night.”
I showed it to Lara.
“Ok, there you go. He doesn’t sound freaked out to me.”
“Yeah, but this is a text. It’s very hard to grasp tone from a text.”
Lara laid back on my bed and sighed heavily.
“You are impossible sometimes,” she said. “I’ve never known you to get so worked up over a guy before. I admire the strength you usually have. What’s different about this one?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “Maybe it’s because of Daniel. I’m afraid to allow myself to be that open with someone again. The last time I did that my heart got stomped on. Or maybe it’s just because this is all happening so fast. I don’t know.”
I hated feeling this way. I was relieved that Paul had accepted the dinner offer, and he didn’t sound very alarmed. It was surprising that he didn’t make a joke out of it or anything, unless maybe he was just keeping things inside like he always did. He had a tendency to do that.
The pizza came soon and we found a fun comedy on Netflix to watch. And the rest of the night we didn’t really talk much about Paul or relationships, which was good. I wanted to keep things out of my mind for a bit and just have some fun.
But Paul was always on my mind. I could not stop thinking about his touch, feeling his rock hard body against me, that beautiful cock of his pounding away inside of me, his taste—everything about the man I was obsessed with.
Was that the right word? Obsession?
I would have to agree that it was. That was the only way I could rationalize the intense feelings I was having for him. If I had to probe deeper I would say I was falling in love with him for sure.
And I knew it was fast. I knew it was probably not reciprocated, and I was scared. I didn’t want to get hurt again. My heart had been so scarred, so trampled on. I was terrified to put myself back out there again. As long as Paul and I were just having a passionate physical affair, which is what I’d assumed after the night of the Halloween party, then everything was fine. I could deal with that because my heart wasn’t involved. I’d never had a purely physical, lighthearted relationship with anyone before, but I was willing to give it a shot.
Except this wasn’t just a physical thing. Paul and I had a real connection. It was deeper than either one of us probably realized or were looking for. I’d never experienced a burning desire for someone like this before. I just ached to be touched by him.
After last night I was wet at the mere thought of Paul’s name. When he’d surprised me in the bathroom at the concert I was unsure what was about to happen, but as soon as we started getting it on I felt like a crazed animal. I was giving full reign to all of my lust and passion. I could still taste him between my lips. I never thought I could worship a body part before, but I had to say that I was in love with his cock. I wanted to taste it again, feel it in my hands, my mouth, my body… I was willing to let him put it anywhere he wanted whenever he wanted.
And adding to this physical addiction was an emotional connection which I guessed was very much like love, or at least getting there.
I made the decision that I was going to tell Paul how I felt tomorrow night after dinner.
It would either end well or it would end there. Either way, I knew it was the best thing for me.
Chapter Ten
Paul
“Would you like some more meatloaf?”
I held up my hand and shook my head.
“If I eat another bite, I’m going to burst,” I said. “But thank you so much Mrs. Helms. It was delicious.”
Debbie’s mom smiled and gave me a nod before walking to the kitchen with some dirty dishes.
I was having a great time with Debbie’s parents. They were very sweet people and me and her dad even seemed to be getting along.
And the food was amazing. That wasn’t me just trying to charm Mrs. Helms, but I could tell that my charms were working. It was easy talking to parents. They’d always seemed to love me.
When I’d received Debbie’s text about coming over to meet her folks, I was a bit put off. We’d known each other less than a wee
k and it really felt like it was moving too fast.
But I was in love with Debbie. I knew it already. I’d never met someone who could make me feel so alive just with the very thought of them. I wanted desperately to tell her how I felt, but it was too soon. I was still convinced that I had to play my cards right if I didn’t want to mess this up. And this actually created more anxiety in me. I was normally not the type of guy who worried if anyone really liked me or loved me, no matter how I felt about them. I’d been in love before, and I’d had my heart broken, but I was resilient and I always bounced back quickly.
But now I felt that if Debbie pushed me away because she thought I was moving faster than she wanted to, I would be devastated. I might even move back home and leave this town I’d come to love so much.
I did not want to do that.
But what did this mean, with Debbie inviting me to her parent’s house for a nice meal.
Debbie looked amazing as always. When I first arrived at her house I almost felt like a teenager on prom night or something. It had been a long time since I’d gone to a girl’s house who still lived with her parents to pick her up or to actually meet them. And I found I was a bit nervous about meeting her folks. But they were both lovely.
We finished up dinner and relaxed a bit with some coffee and conversation. Her father told me about how he used to restore old cars and then we talked music for a bit. Apparently, he used to play drums with a band before he got married and settled down.
“Do you ever miss it?” I asked him. “I’ve been toying with the idea of playing again.”
“Yeah, I did miss it for a long time,” he said, “But I definitely made the right decision. I fell in love and we wanted to have a family. The life of a travelling musician is not really conducive that sort of thing.”
“I hear you,” I said.
“So how long have you and Debbie known each other?” Her father asked me.
“They met at the Halloween party last week,” her mom answered.
“Is that right? Well, I’m just glad we got Debbie out of the house to go.”
“Dad…” Debbie said.
I smiled. She might have been one of the few women I’d ever known who did not call her father “daddy”.
“So, dinner with the folks? It was fun. Thanks for inviting me.” I asked Debbie when she walked me out of her parent’s house. We’d finished dinner and I thanked them very much for wonderful evening, which it had been. I’d really enjoyed their company.
Once we were outside in her yard Debbie and I were able to talk a bit more freely.
Debbie laughed nervously.
“I’m sorry, if this feels too… weird…” She said.
“I admit I was very surprised, but it’s been cool. Your folks are very sweet.”
“Yeah, it was my mom’s idea to invite you over. She overheard me and Lara talking about us and she just took the initiative to ask me to invite you.”
“Oh, you and Lara were talking about me?” I asked with a smile. “What about?”
“Oh, just girl talk,” she said.
“Girl talk? Hmmm, do girls talk to each other about sex as much as men do?” I asked. “I’ve always wondered that.”
Debbie laughed. She was getting even more nervous now. I loved to ask questions that pushed people’s comfort levels. It has always been amusing to me.
“We do,” Debbie said. “I was telling her about the concert. And I told her everything.”
“Wow, somebody is getting bold,” I said.
“That’s right,” Debbie replied. “I’m not as much of a good girl as you probably think I am.”
“Oh, I would never dream of such a thing,” I teased. “You are awesome though. And I think this is becoming more amazing all the time.”
I held my breath for a moment. What had I just said? Did I just accidentally reveal to Debbie that I was crazy about her? Or was I still playing it cool? The line was getting blurred and I wasn’t sure if I’d just crossed it or not.
Debbie looked down at her feet and back up at me with that sweet smile.
“You think so?” She asked.
I could hear the hope in her voice. She wanted me to say yes. And that was what I wanted to hear from her as well.
“Yeah, I do,” I said. “I know we’ve only just begun seeing each other, but I think you are very special. And I’m very glad to have you in my life.”
Debbie smiled and kissed me sweetly.
“Me too,” she said. “I wish I could spend the night at your place tonight, but with the dinner and all I know my mom and dad are going to be asking me a million questions. Plus they are very old fashioned and if they know I’m staying over with you it will make them ask more questions.”
I nodded.
“I get it,” I said. “But what about the other night when you stayed over?”
“Oh, I told them I stayed at Lara’s.”
I burst out laughing. I couldn’t hold it back. I didn’t want to laugh at Debbie, but this was funny to me. She was a grown woman sneaking around and lying to her parents like a teenager.
“I know,” Debbie said. “Laugh it up. I’m lame.”
“Yes, you are,” I confirmed. “But you’re adorable all the same.”
“Well, gee. Thanks.”
“You know how strange that sounded, right? You are twenty-three. I understand you live in their house, but still the rules shouldn’t apply to you that much.”
“Well, like I said, it is their house and I do have to lie a bit. My dad probably thinks I’m still a virgin. My mom knows better, but she would never talk about it or ask me much about it.”
“Wow, I am so fascinated by this dynamic,” I said. I truly was.
“What about it?” Debbie asked.
“Your family really reminds me so much of mine,” I said. “When I was on the farm I pretty much had to explain my comings and goings too. But I’m such a jerk I just told them where I was and I didn’t care what they thought. I probably could have handled it better with some more discretion. I’m feeling kind of bad about it now, but that was me.”
“I wish I had that courage,” Debbie said.
“You are far more courageous than you think,” I said.
“Thanks.”
I kissed Debbie. Her soft lips were so comforting to me. When I kissed her I felt the entire world and all those problems just melting off me.
“Goodnight, sweetie,” I said.
“Goodnight,” Debbie replied.
I got in my truck, started it up, and waved to Debbie quickly before driving away.
When I got home I was still a little wired. Being “on” all night entertaining Debbie’s parents had made me feel a bit hyper. I decided to chill out with some beers and maybe find a good movie or game on television to watch. It was only a quarter past nine, so I had a few hours before I needed to hit the sack. Tomorrow was unfortunately a work day.
I was just getting into a good horror movie I found on Amazon when a knock at my door came. I shut off the movie and listened. Who the hell was knocking on my door? I wasn’t expecting anyone.
When I answered I was shocked to discover who exactly it was.
Janice Myers. My ex-girlfriend was standing in front of me. I hadn’t seen her in a few months and If I went my whole life without seeing her again I’d considered myself very lucky.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I asked.
Janice sighed and stepped back.
“I want to talk to you,” Janice said.
“We have nothing to talk about. Why the hell would you think I wanted to talk to you?”
“Because it’s important,” Janice said. “It’s really important. Please let me come in. Just for a few minutes.”
I stood there looking at her for a moment. Why I didn’t just slam the door in her face, I didn’t know. But for some reason I felt a tiny bit sorry for her, which she did not deserve. I should have had no compassion for her at all after what she’d done to me.
>
“OK, I’ll give you two minutes,” I said stepping back and allowing her to pass.
“Nice house,” Janice said once inside my living room.
“Two minutes, clock is ticking…” I said.
“Look, I’m sorry. I miss you. I miss us. I made a mistake,” Janice said.
“A mistake? You cheated on me with my best friend. And I found out it had been going on for almost a month. That’s a repeated mistake. And it’s the biggest act of betrayal I can imagine. I really cared about you. I thought we had a great thing going.”
I was feeling so amped up. This woman had ripped my heart into little pieces and now when I had moved away and started over and was starting to actually get my life together again, she comes waltzing back in to destroy everything all over again. No way. I was not letting her back in my life no matter what.
“I know, and I’m sorry. I don’t know why I did it or how it happened. I just know that I miss you. I need you. I can’t stop thinking about you, baby…”
“Don’t call me baby,” I said. “Don’t cry those stupid crocodile tears to me. It’s not going to work. You and I are done. We will stay done. Now get out of my house and leave me alone. I never want to see you again.”
Janice started to walk past me and then she stopped suddenly. I could smell her sweet perfume and for the first time I noticed exactly how good she looked. Janice was always the hottest girl in our little town. From where I was standing right then I could hardly resist glancing down into her beautiful cleavage.
Janice reached out right then and grabbed my crotch through my pants, massaging me.
I stepped back, jerking my body away from her.
“No!” I said. “This is not happening. Get out of my house. We are done. End of story.”
“I felt your boner,” Janice said. “I know you still want this…”
“No. I don’t. I’m with someone. And I’ve got a new life going here. You are gone. We are done.”
“You’ve already met someone? Who is she?” Janice demanded.
“None of your business. What part of get out of my life and stay out do you not understand?” I shouted.
