by R L Burgess
“Just in time,” Jessica said, ushering Reyna into the taxi and squeezing in behind her. They all settled into the cab and the driver pulled away from the hotel. Reyna sighed inwardly in frustration. This wasn’t meant to happen. She was trying to avoid Zoe, not head out on the town with her.
“I’m glad you’re feeling better, Zoe,” Jessica said.
“Thanks, turns out the headache passed. I’m keen to get a look at the nightlife in town.”
Reyna gazed out the window, watching a blur of gum trees flash by in the fading light as they sped into town. It was a short trip and she found she hadn’t had to say much before the taxi driver announced they had arrived.
“I don’t see it,” Walter said, squinting out the window. They were stopped in a car park at the back of town.
“It’s just down that alley. You’ll see a red door. Can’t miss it, mate.”
They thanked the driver, paid him and left the cab, Reyna following behind as the group entered the alleyway. They heard it before they spotted the red door with a chalkboard hung on it. The words “follow the music” were scrawled on it in white chalk. Sounds of thumping bass spilled out from above, filling the alleyway, and they opened the door to a set of thin wooden stairs, just wide enough for them to climb in single file. The music intensified as they reached the fourth floor and Jessica pulled open another red door to reveal a large open terrace with a DJ at one end, a dance floor in the middle, and a crowd of well-dressed partygoers making the most of both. Music flooded across the terrace, a light show pulsing in time with the beat. Reyna stood still, letting her senses adjust to the onslaught. It had been ages since she’d been in a club. A soft desert breeze floated across the rooftop. She had never been in a club where you could see the stars.
“Come on,” Jessica called. “Drinks.”
Reyna followed the group to the bar, allowing Jessica to place a glass of pinot gris in her hand. They spotted a table at the edge of the room by one of the glass panels that acted as walls. It was too loud to talk, but everyone attempted it anyway, shouting into each other’s ears to try to be heard. Zoe, seated across from her, was laughing at something Jessica said, her head tipped back and her wide smile lighting up her face. Jessica’s arm was casually draped across the back of Zoe’s chair. Reyna looked away, her chest strangely tight. Was there something between them?
“Do you want to dance?” Walter shouted, his face so close to hers she could feel his warm spittle on her cheek. She left it there, feeling it would be rude to wipe it away.
“Not yet,” she called back. “I’ll just find the bathrooms.”
She slipped from her chair and weaved through the crowd, spotting what looked to be a bathroom door at the end of the terrace. She was not disappointed, and inside she closed herself in a cubicle and sat down on the lid of the toilet seat. She felt like she was floating above her own body tonight. She was suddenly desperately not in the mood to be at this bar. Why had she come? She missed Holden and her home, their home. This…being in a club in the middle of nowhere with a buzz in her head from the alcohol, watching a woman she could not be with flirt with someone else… This was a strange form of torture and she wished she wasn’t here. She would grab her handbag and slip out she decided, flushing the toilet for show and leaving the cubicle. She washed her hands and pulled open the bathroom door and for the second time that day, walked straight into Zoe’s arms.
“We have to stop meeting like this,” Zoe said with a shy smile, catching Reyna around the waist as she stumbled forward.
“Yes.” Caught off guard, Reyna was aware her tone sounded cold.
“Sorry, it was just a joke,” Zoe said, her eyes wounded as she dropped her hands and stepped aside.
Reyna nodded as she slipped past, unsure what to say. God, she was really making a mess of this. She made her way back to the table and drained her drink, reaching for her handbag to make a quick getaway.
“Your shout next then, Reyna,” Jessica called across the table. “I’ll have the same again.”
Hiding her frustration, she smiled politely at the group. She could hardly leave without paying her round. She took orders and threaded her way through the throng of dancers to the bar, Walter’s hand in the small of her back as he accompanied her to help “carry the drinks.” Another one she would have to let down gently, she thought.
She was actually grateful for his help as they squeezed through the crowd to the table, balancing the assorted drinks between them. Walter had convinced her to get one more for herself, which she had, finding herself unable to explain she was leaving. Zoe had returned from the bathroom and studiously avoided Reyna’s eyes as she distributed the drinks.
The music seemed louder, as if the DJ were in competition with herself, and the dance floor was beginning to fill up.
“I’m ready to dance,” Jessica announced to the table. “Who’s coming?”
Reyna shook her head, as did Walter, opting to stay at the table with her, but Jacquie and Caroline were keen.
“Come on, Zoe,” Jessica cried, grabbing Zoe’s hand and pulling her gently from the table. “I insist you dance.” Jessica towed her away, laughing as they made their way to the dance floor.
“Pull up okay for the end of financial year?” Walter said into Reyna’s ear.
Oh hell, Reyna thought. She smiled politely and kept her distance, raising her voice to be heard over the music. “Yes, no problems. You?”
Walter leaned in and gave her a detailed rundown of their end-of-financial-year woes and the problems with their new accounting software. It was hard work but at least she was not required to say anything in response.
Instead, she let her eyes drift around the room, settling on Zoe who was playfully waving her arms in the air on the dance floor, laughing as she exposed her midriff. Jessica grabbed Zoe around the waist, pulling her in close and they danced together, Zoe’s arms around Jessica’s neck. Jessica was saying something in Zoe’s ear. She was grinning. And then they were swept from her view as others danced in front of them. Damn. Reyna flashed with irritation. She did not need to see that.
Walter droned on. Reyna finished her glass of wine, aware that she was drinking too quickly. Jessica and Zoe danced back into view, Jessica’s hands on Zoe’s hips, Jessica spinning her around, Zoe losing her balance and Jessica scooping her into her arms and nuzzling her face into Zoe’s neck. And then, laughing together, they disappeared back into the crowd.
“Walter,” she said, cutting him off mid-sentence. “I’ve actually got to head back to the hotel. I forgot I have an important phone call to make.”
“No problem,” he cried, jumping up to follow her. “I’ll see you back to the hotel.”
“No.” She held up her hand with a gentle smile. “I’m fine, thanks. Really. Please stay here and enjoy yourself.”
And with that, she flung open the little red door on the side of the terrace and ran down the stairs, holding onto the rail tightly to keep her balance. She called a taxi as she reached the bottom and stood in the alley, trying to convince herself everything was just fine.
She woke at six, after a night spent tossing and turning in the hotel’s comfortable bed. She had been unable to get the image of Zoe dancing with Jessica out of her mind. She had also been unable to stop imagining what it would have been like if she were dancing with Zoe, where she would have put her hands. Done with the pretence of sleep, she threw back the covers and tossed on her sweatpants. Perhaps she would grab an early breakfast and a cup of tea to take back to her room.
As she let herself out of her room she was surprised to see someone walking down the pathway in the semi darkness. As the person got closer she realised it was Zoe, still in her sea-green crop top and flared pants from the night before.
“Good morning,” Reyna said, her clipped tone clearly giving Zoe a start as she stepped onto the pathway.
“Oh, hi,” Zoe said, pulling up short, her hand on her heart. “You gave me a fright. I didn’t see you there.�
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“Big night?”
“Yeah, I guess. It was fun. You left early?”
Reyna felt a flash of anger. “Zoe, I brought you to this conference to learn and to participate, to represent Azoulay House, not to stay out all night partying and getting drunk.”
Zoe’s eyes widened. “I am not drunk, thank you. And I haven’t stayed out all night partying. My room—”
“Save it, Zoe. I’m not your mother and as your boss, I don’t need to hear your excuses. Just make sure you are on top of your game today. I expect you’ll be attending the full suite of today’s program.”
“Of course I will.” Her cheeks were flushed, her tone indignant. “I’m trying to tell you—”
“Good, well, have a good morning then.” Reyna stalked down the pathway toward the main hotel complex, aware that she had been bitchy and cold, but too mad to care. Clearly Zoe had not returned to her room last night. Had she spent the night with Jessica? Who else? From the way she was behaving, it must have been Jessica’s intention from the onset of the evening. So that was what Zoe was after. A roll in the hay, a conference dalliance. Well thank god Reyna had not allowed the kiss to get out of hand. She burned with embarrassment as she thought about the grandiose speech she had given Zoe the morning before. I’m not in the market for a relationship, she had said. She cringed at the memory. Obviously Zoe wasn’t either.
The restaurant was almost empty when she entered and she found herself a table and sat down, her appetite suddenly gone. She regretted showing Zoe her anger. She should have kept it together. What Zoe did after hours wasn’t her business, as long as she wasn’t besmirching Azoulay House’s good name. God knows people got up to a lot worse than a late night shag at a conference. She had heard stories of all-night drunken parties, where it was all in as far as sex was concerned. Reyna had always steered clear of that kind of thing, opting for the sensible, controlled behaviour that befit her position as a leader in the industry.
She had a momentary flicker of jealousy and then she shooed it away in irritation. Jealous of wild, drunken parties? She would not be where she was today if she had indulged in that kind of behaviour. And Holden would not have the kind of aunty who could have stepped in and provided for him at a moment’s notice. No, she had made good choices. But why was that suddenly leaving her feeling dry and boring?
“Can I get you anything, ma’am?” a waiter asked, approaching the table.
“Just a black tea, please,” she answered, smiling at him grimly. It was Wednesday. She would be leaving on Friday afternoon. She had really been looking forward to this conference, but now, as far as she was concerned, Friday could not come quick enough.
“Hi Holdy,” Reyna waved at the computer as she sat cross-legged on her hotel bed, her laptop propped up on a pillow in front of her. “Hi Mum, hi Dad. I’m glad I caught you before you left for school.”
“Hi Aunty Reeeeeey.” Holden’s face pixelated on her screen, froze and then caught up with itself in a blur. Reyna cursed the hotel’s Internet connection. “Have you seen a crocodile yet?”
“No darling, but I did see a couple of wedge-tailed eagles yesterday afternoon. They were circling above the hotel.”
“Cool! Probably looking for mice.”
“Eww.”
“Well that’s what they eat, Aunty Rey.”
Her mum leaned forward, peering at the screen like Reyna was somehow inside the computer. “How’s the conference, darling?” Her parents were not exactly luddites but they weren’t super comfortable with the technology. “Have you done your presentation yet?”
“Yes, it was great, thanks, but I miss you guys. I can’t wait to give you a proper squeeze, Holdy. Shall we have takeaway for dinner when I come home on Friday night? Pizza?”
“Nah, we had pizza for dinner last night. And sushi for dinner the night before. Pops reckons we should try as many different country’s takeaways as possible before you get home.”
“Does he now!” Reyna raised her eyebrows. “Right, well, it will be boiled veggies for you when I get home.”
“No way! And guess what I had for breakfast!” He didn’t wait for her to guess. “Coco Pops.”
She grimaced. “Mum, please don’t give him Coco Pops before school. He needs something really low GI and filling to see him through the day.”
“I know, darling. It’s not my first rodeo. I just let him have a small bowl before we had porridge with banana. Will that do?”
“Yeah.” She smiled sheepishly. “Thanks.”
“We’d better go, Aunty Rey. Pops and I are riding our bikes to school and I want to go past the skate park on the way. Pops said I can go down the bowl a couple of times before school.”
“Okay, sweetheart, go easy. Look after those knees. Have a great day everyone.”
“You too, darling.”
“See you, love,” her dad said, overenunciating into the computer screen.
She smiled as they disconnected, her face feeling strangely out of sync with the ache in her heart. She was lonely. No, she was feeling alone. She didn’t know exactly what the difference was, but she knew it wasn’t great.
By dinner Reyna felt guilty. She shouldn’t have taken her anger out on Zoe. She had spotted her throughout the day, diligently attending the day’s offerings, but their paths had not crossed and there had been no excuse to make them do so. Sitting now at a large table with Meryl and Stacey, she scanned the room, but Zoe was nowhere to be seen.
As if reading her mind, Meryl said, “Zoe will be preparing for her talk tomorrow morning. Reckon she’s a bit nervous about it.”
“She shouldn’t be,” Stacey chimed in. “From what she told us about it over lunch, it sounds like it will be brilliant. Has she run it past you Reyna?”
“I saw the preliminary draft but I haven’t had a chance to check in with her since,” she replied, her guilt intensifying. She really should have made the effort to do that. As far as she knew, it was the first time Zoe had presented at a conference, and as her boss, it really was her role to provide her with some guidance and mentorship. “Maybe I should touch base with her after dinner and see how it’s going. Do you know which room she’s in?”
“Three-eleven,” Stacey said. “It’s the Desert Spring building at the back. She’s right next door to us. Your assistant must have booked the rooms at the same time. Strange you’re not with us.”
“No, I ah, well, I think Nikki must have booked mine separately. I’m in one of the suites. Anyway, perhaps I’ll take her a plate of something. She’ll have missed dinner at this rate.”
“Great, I was going to do that, but if you do, it’ll save me the hike back to the rooms,” Meryl said. “We can go for a dip in the pool instead, Stace.”
Reyna read the hallway signs and followed the gold-plated numbers down toward room 311. At Zoe’s door she hesitated, balancing a plate of assorted items from the buffet in one hand before she knocked on the door. Was this a bad idea? She didn’t want Zoe to get the wrong message, but she did feel she owed her this as an employee. She would want to go over any of her employee’s presentations with them before a big conference. She had been lax not pursuing it with Zoe. She had seemed so confident back in the office. Reyna had let her run with it. Resolutely, she knocked. There was a shuffling sound inside and then the padding of footsteps to the door. It swung open, Zoe’s face registering surprise, and then a mask of wariness.
“You have your presentation in the morning,” Reyna said, suddenly unsure of herself.
“Yes.”
“I didn’t see you at dinner so I thought you might need sustenance.”
“I ordered up.”
“Oh.” Reyna ploughed on in the face of Zoe’s standoffish demeanour. “I realised we never went over the final draft of your presentation. You were going to email it to me, but I didn’t hear from you. Do you want me to look it over now?”
Zoe leaned on the doorframe, her arms crossed over an oversized V-necked football shirt, a pa
ir of denim cutoffs that barely covered her thighs, her feet bare. Her normally open face was closed off, as if a light had been turned out, her expression unyielding in the harsh fluorescent light of the hallway.
“Thank you, but I think I have it covered. No need to burden yourself.”
“Okay, but I’d do this for any employee. It’s my role to support you at your first conference.”
“It’s not my first conference.”
“Oh. Right. I thought you said you hadn’t been here before.”
“That’s right. I’ve never been to FinCo, but I’ve been to plenty of other smaller conferences, Reyna. I’ve even given the odd presentation or two.”
“Okay, well if you’ve got it covered.” Reyna turned to go, feeling stupid with the plate of food in her hand.
“You can come in if you want.”
Reyna hesitated, turning back to look in Zoe’s eyes. She raised her chin, willing herself to sound calm, confident, in control. She was the CEO of her firm for god’s sake. “It’s up to you, Zoe. Like I said, I would usually go over things with any of my employees before a big conference presentation. I just thought you might like that opportunity.”
Zoe studied her for moment and then stepped back from the doorframe, holding open the door. Her tone was more conciliatory as she said, “Actually, I’d appreciate that.”
She stepped into the room, edging past Zoe. Her laptop was open on the bed, which was rumpled where she had clearly been sitting when Reyna knocked. Reyna looked around and perched on the edge of the desk, setting the plate of food next to her.
“Do you want me to look at your slides or would you like to practice your delivery?”
“Maybe we could do both?”
“Sure. Turn your laptop to face me and start from the beginning.”
