by Katy Kaylee
I nodded my head enthusiastically. “Yes, you need to. I spoke with Lydia. She says you can borrow one of her dresses. She gets a lot of stuff free and never wears it.”
“Oh my god. I didn’t even think about a dress. I don’t know about this, Jax. It really isn’t my scene. I’ve never been to anything black-tie unless you count my senior prom. I don’t think you understand just how out of place I’ll be. Maybe you should take Carolina,” she suggested.
I grinned at her, already picturing her in a sexy, low-cut gown with all the glitz and glamour. “I would say it’s about time you did go to a black-tie event. It’ll be fun. I’ll text you Lydia’s number. The two of you can figure out when you can go shopping in her closet. If you don’t find anything, I’ll take you.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m not going shopping with you.”
“Then, find something in Lydia’s closet. I need to get back to work. Don’t try and change your mind. I’ll take care of the arrangements. This time, we won’t be staying in some backwoods hotel. We’ll stay at the Four Seasons.”
She was staring at me like she wanted to tell me something. I assumed she was going to protest or come up with some excuse about why she couldn’t go. I walked out of her office before she got the chance. I wasn’t about to take no for an answer. I didn’t mind being a little aggressive when it came to getting something I wanted. I really wanted her, and I was going to push hard to make her realize she wanted me as well.
24
PENNY
I felt ridiculous. I felt like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman walking into the fancy stores on Rodeo Drive. Which one of these things is not like the other, I thought, looking at Lydia’s perfect model figure. She was thin, tall, and of course, gorgeous. I couldn’t believe I was standing in her closet, which happened to be about the size of the bedroom in my apartment.
“I kind of went through these last night and pulled a few I thought you might like,” she said, gesturing to a row of dresses.
“I don’t know. I really appreciate your generosity, but we are not exactly the same size,” I told her.
She waved a hand through the air. “That’s why there are tapes and pins and whatnot. No one is a perfect size anything. The dresses are bags when we put them on. It’s the dressers behind the scenes that make them fit. Fashion is fluid. We’ll find something.”
I admired her confidence, but I wasn’t sure I shared it. “Thank you.”
“Okay, do you like basic black?” she asked, pulling a black cocktail dress from the rack.
“I do like black.”
She held it up to me. She grimaced. “No. With your dark hair, you need something that contrasts and pops.”
I watched as she put it back, pulling out a flashy red dress that looked more like a nightie. “I don’t know, I’m not really a red kind of girl.”
She raised her eyebrow. “You’re not. I thought—”
She stopped talking. I knew exactly what she was going to say. She was going to say Jax liked red. He did like red, but I didn’t like red clothes. I didn’t mind red panties or a fiery-red bra, but I did not wear red. “How about that one?” I said, pointing to a sparkling silver dress.
Something about it caught my eye. It was slinky and flashy and completely unlike me. I loved it. Her eyes widened. “Yes! Why didn’t I see that?”
She yanked it off the rack and held it up to me. I held out my arms, waiting to see what her opinion would be. I had to trust the supermodel’s fashion sense.
“No?” I asked hesitantly.
“Yes! Go try it on,” she ordered, pointing to the massive bathroom that was on the other side of the closet.
I took it, feeling like a teen looking for the right prom dress. I shrugged off my clothes, pulling off my bra to get the real effect. I turned sideways in the mirror, trying to flatten the dress over the slight swell in my tummy area. No matter how hard I tried to suck it in, it wasn’t going anywhere.
I walked out of the bathroom and found Lydia standing in front of a framed magazine cover featuring her. She looked the same in many ways, but there was an innocent vibe I got. I realized it was one of her first covers.
“Well?” I asked.
She turned to look at me, a bright smile spreading across her face as she nodded. “Yes! That dress was made for you.”
“Are you sure? It feels kind of revealing,” I said, smoothing my hand over the sequined fabric that clung to my curves, hugging my hips before it flowed down to the floor. There was a dangerously high slit up the side that could be problematic if I took a long step.
“It is gorgeous on you. It is perfect. Just stunning. No one is going to notice Lydia Lydon. All eyes are going to be on Penny Logan. You are going to be the talk of the town, the fashion world,” she exclaimed.
“I wouldn’t go that far,” I muttered.
“I would. Trust me. You are going to rock the worlds of those stuffy people,” she said.
I wasn’t sure I wanted to do any rocking of the worlds, but I smiled and pretended to be okay with it. I changed back into my clothes before carefully carrying the dress back into the room.
“Thank you again for this,” I said, hanging the dress up.
“I am going to have my personal seamstress take care of the adjustments. She’ll send it directly to the hotel in Chicago,” she said.
“Seriously? I can make it work,” I promised.
“It’s fine. I’ll tell her to take it down to a four?” she asked.
I nodded. “Yes, please.”
“Perfect. Let’s grab something to drink,” she said and walked out of the room.
I followed her down the hall, my eyes briefly roaming over the many framed magazine covers lining the walls. She was a successful woman. I could see why Jax liked being hooked up with her in the press. She was perfect. I couldn’t compete with her. I wouldn’t dare to try.
“Wine?” she asked, pulling a bottle from a small refrigerator resting on the counter of the huge kitchen.
“Um, no, thank you,” I said, not looking directly at her.
“You’re right. How about a diet soda?” she asked.
“Please.”
She opened the left side of her massive refrigerator. I looked around her kitchen and was thoroughly impressed. It must be nice to be wealthy. Although, I didn’t think I’d like the lack of privacy and the stock put on my looks. Especially in my current situation.
“The cook made me some fruit and cheese trays,” she said, placing a silver tray on the counter.
“That looks amazing,” I said, admiring the chunks of assorted fruit.
I could absolutely get used to having food prepared for me. She grabbed a couple of plates, and we dished up before moving out to the patio next to her pool. It was way too cold to swim, but the weather was decent and she had her patio heaters on.
“I’m really happy I finally get to meet you. I feel like I know you already,” she said with a laugh.
“Really? How?”
“Jax. Jax talked about you nonstop. The three years I’ve known him, he has told me all about you. ‘Penny had the most beautiful eyes,’ or ‘Penny doesn’t like onions, she always wrinkles her nose,’ Penny, Penny, Penny,” she said with a giggle.
“Really?” I asked with surprise.
She nodded her eyes, popping a grape into her mouth. “Really. ‘Penny always stops to pet dogs and talks to their owners like she’s known them forever,’” she said in a masculine voice that sounded very much like Jax.
I giggled, shaking my head. “I had no idea.”
“Now you do.”
I leaned back in the chair and thought about what she had said. I had no idea he had thought about me, let alone talked about me. It was crazy. I had been convinced he hated me for years. “Lydia, how much do you know about me and Jax?” I asked.
She grimaced, nodding her head. “I know what he did. I know he was a complete asshole to you. I have told him just how much of a jerk I thought he was.”
“Re
ally?”
“Yes, really. I love Jax, but what he did was not cool.”
I immediately felt aligned with her, like she could be a real friend. I knew she was Jax’s friend first, but I was relieved to know she knew of our sordid past. “Why do you think he did what he did? I mean, did he tell you why he spread that horrible rumor about me?”
She slowly shook her head. “No. I’m sorry. I’ve asked him several times, but he never gives me an answer.”
I sighed, worried I would never know the truth. “One of these days,” I mumbled.
“Penny, there is something I do know about Jax.”
“What’s that?” I snapped.
“That he’s never been with another woman since you,” she said softly.
“That can’t be true.”
She smiled. “It is. I think he dated a few women, but it was always very surface. It’s why we play up our fake relationship. It makes it easier for him to stay single. He doesn’t have to worry about women hitting on him—as much.”
I wrinkled my nose, not entirely sure I believed what she was saying. “Jax Michaels has always been a womanizer. He was a serial dater in college and high school.”
“Not since I’ve known him. I met him right after he got started in the business. I think he was a little caught up in the crazy world at first and was absolutely drinking too much and partying too hard, and there were a lot of women throwing themselves at him, but he looked lost. I felt bad for him and took him under my wing. He was destined to go down a dark road. I saved him.” She grinned.
I laughed, appreciating her rather humble assessment of things. “I see.”
“Really. Jax is one of the kindest men I know. I’ve had some pretty horrible boyfriends and dated some real losers. When I met Jax, I assumed he would be the same. It was after I talked with him a bit that I realized he wasn’t like the others.”
“Jax—kind?”
“Yes. Very. I know what he did was horrible, absolutely repugnant, but that isn’t him. I can’t explain what he did, but I know there was something that set him off. I am not going to pressure you or tell you what to do, but I will tell you Jax is a good guy. Does he do stupid shit? Absolutely, but that’s what makes him special,” she said.
I sighed. I wanted to believe her. I wanted to think of Jax as kind and sweet and thoughtful. I wanted the father of my child to be the man Lydia described. It was the happily ever after that every girl fantasized about, even if she pretended she didn’t.
“The Jax I know is very different than the man you describe.”
“I think the Jax you know was confused. He made some pretty rotten choices, but I think you owe yourself the chance to know the man I’ve come to care a lot about—as a friend. As one of my best, most trusted friends. It isn’t easy being in this world, but having Jax there when I need a friend is huge. That day at the office, I had gotten some horrible news. Jax was comforting me. He’s big and burly and can sometimes be gruff and abrasive, but my god, I would have fallen apart a long time ago if it hadn’t been for him,” she explained.
“I’m glad the two of you have each other. You two really are good together. Why haven’t you guys ever hooked up, or have?” I asked.
Her eyes went wide. “No! Never! Ew!”
I burst into laughter. “All right. I get it.”
“We’re friends, Penny. Only friends. I hope you and I can be friends.”
“I’d like that.”
“He’s changed since you’ve come back into his life. You’ve changed him. You can make him better.”
“Thank you. I’m not sure what we’ve got going on, but right now, we’re both focused on the launch. Neither of us has the time to think about anything else. Right now, I just want to make sure everything goes well,” I told her.
She smiled, nodding her head. “Yeah, sure.”
I mulled over all she had said. I had no idea how to process everything. It was all so confusing. I wanted the Jax she described, but I knew Jax, and he wasn’t that man. If it was true and they’d never slept together, which I did tend to believe, Lydia didn’t know him like I did. She didn’t know what it was like to be hurt by him. I instinctively rested my hand over my stomach. Jax’s baby was growing inside me. It was weird to think of a part of him inside of me, growing and thriving. I had no idea what I was going to do, but hearing Lydia’s testimony had tilted the scales in favor of a bright future for me and Jax and our baby. It wasn’t a huge tilt, but it was just enough to make me think.
25
JAX
Penny had been in the bathroom of the hotel suite for what felt like hours. I was growing more nervous by the second, worried she was going to change her mind about going. I knew I had pressured her into the gala but had hoped she would appreciate the wining and dining. So far, there’d been very little conversation. Hell, she would barely look at me on the flight over.
I stood in front of the floor-length mirror, straightening the bow tie of my tux and smoothing down the jacket. I checked the time for at least the tenth time in the past five minutes. Fashionably late was one thing, but if she didn’t emerge from the bathroom soon, we were going to be walking in when the thing was over. I heard the bathroom door open and turned to see her.
I couldn’t breathe. Or speak. Hell, I couldn’t even think straight as I stared at her. She looked ethereal, like a goddess straight from the heavens, all shimmer and beauty. “Wow,” I breathed.
She ran a hand over the shimmering silver dress. “I don’t know. I feel very, um, exposed,” she said nervously.
I shook my head. “Gorgeous.”
“Thank you.”
“But you’re right. You’re too exposed. Every man in the room is going to be looking at you. Maybe we should think about one of those muumuu dresses. I don’t know if I want everyone to see you like that. It might start a riot. I will absolutely sacrifice my life to protect you from the mob of men that are bound to flock to you,” I told her, meaning every word.
She must have thought I was joking. She giggled softly, the movement making the dress catch the light, drawing my attention to the low-cut bodice where her plump cleavage was on display. “You’re too kind.”
She moved toward me, and that’s when I saw the slit in the gown. Her perfect leg appeared, the strappy silver heels she was wearing making her appear taller while elongating her legs. “No way. I can’t.”
“You can’t what?”
“That dress. You. My god. You are the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen,” I gasped.
She blushed under the carefully applied makeup. “Thank you,” she said with a smile.
My heart felt as if it were blooming. I loved her. My god how I loved the woman, and she didn’t even know it. Staring at her, seeing how beautiful she was, almost hurt. I longed for her to be mine. I wanted to make her mine, brand her with my touch, and make sure the entire world knew they could look but they could never touch, and the looks damn well better be brief. I could understand why someone would want to look at her, but I would not allow ogling. That body was mine, and I would be the only one ogling.
“Are you ready?” I asked her.
She slowly shook her head, her eyes locked with mine. “No. Turn around. I want to get a good look at you in a tux. It isn’t something I ever thought I would see in person.”
I grinned, giving her a wink before slowly turning, pausing and posing in my practiced model poses, before completing a full circle. “Good?”
“You’re not at all shy, are you?”
I shrugged a shoulder. “A little, but I’ve been doing the posing thing for a while. It comes naturally. Shall we go?”
“Yes. Here goes nothing I suppose,” she mumbled.
“You look beautiful. I’ll be by you all night if you need me. Lydia will be there as well if I get pulled away,” I assured her.
Tonight had to be perfect. I had to show her how good life with me could be. I wanted to give her everything. We headed for the elevator. We got into
the waiting limo and were quickly driven to the event center. I could feel her nerves as she clenched my hand in hers. When the limo stopped in the line of other limos waiting to drop off passengers at the red carpet, Penny slapped my hand.
“We can’t get out there!”
“Why not? It’s the way it’s done.”
She shook her head. “No way. I agreed to come with you, but I do not want to be on the front page of anything.”
“Penny, it will be all right.”
“No way! We can’t! I won’t get out of this car, Jax,” she said firmly, and I knew she had made up her mind.
“Can you drive around the block a couple times?” I asked the driver.
He nodded and pulled out of the line while I called Lydia. Fortunately, she was still at her hotel on the same block, so we parked out front to collect her.
“Hi,” she said, climbing into the car with myself and Penny. “What’s going on?”
“I can’t walk the red carpet with him,” Penny blurted out.
“Why not?” Lydia asked.
“Because the two of you are supposed to be a couple. I am not going to be the other woman.”
Lydia looked at me with a grimace. “She’s right. We talked about our public breakup, but doing it this way is only going to bring hellfire on Penny.”
“Fuck,” I hissed, pissed that my life was dictated by the fucking media.
“We’ll drop Penny at the side entrance. Then we’ll do the red-carpet thing and meet inside,” Lydia offered.
“Thank you. That sounds much better,” Penny breathed, relaxing against the dark leather seat.
“Fine,” I mumbled, not at all pleased to have to leave her alone for even a short time.
We dropped her off with the promise to see her soon. The driver got back in the long line, and when it was finally our turn to walk the carpet, I was in a foul mood. Lydia looked stunning as always. I put on a smile, doing my best to put on a good appearance, standing to the side while Lydia posed and showed off the stunning blue gown she was wearing.
“Jax, when are you going to make it official?” a reporter called out from behind the velvet rope.
