by J. P. Comeau
“What?”
“Kelly, don’t do this to yourself.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m not falling in love with him. Come on.”
“Oh, no. I’m not talking about that. We all know you love the man.”
“Wait, no, I don’t.”
“Yes, you do.”
I sat up. “No, Roxy. I’m not in love with Brenden.”
“Don’t be dumb, Kelly. It’s fine that you are. We’re all okay with it. It’s just--.”
I stood to my feet. “Listen to my words, Roxy. I am not in love with Brenden. At all.”
“Well, then you’ve been doing a damn fine job of fooling all of us.”
I didn’t know how to respond to that.
“All I want to say is, be careful. Okay? It seems like you guys are getting very, very cozy. But, this month is almost out. We’ve only got a week or so to go. Don’t set yourself up for heartache.”
“I won’t, Roxy. You have my word. It’s just some fun, that’s all.”
“Well, judging by the sound of that ‘fun,’ you should be completely good to go in your dating life once you get out of there.”
I should have found that funny, but I didn’t.
“Anyway, I have to go. Got lots more stuff to take care of since he’s slipping into work himself,” I said.
Roxy sighed. “I love you, girl. Just be careful, okay?”
“You know I always am.”
Then, I hung up the phone so I didn’t have to endure another moment of that conversation.
I sighed as I peered into the condo. I thought about the past couple of weeks and all it had brought us. I felt closer to Brenden. I felt as if I were his equal. As if he were finally seeing me for the first time. And I loved it. Not him, but that. I loved the idea that he was finally seeing me instead of all the girls around me. It made me smile. It made me feel beautiful. It made me feel important, and that’s what I wanted to be to someone.
“You’ve got this,” I whispered to myself.
Yes, I knew it would all be done soon. So, why not live it up? Why not go all in and not hold back anymore? I mean, what good did it do me to hold back if there was something sleeping next to me every night that I wanted?
Time to get gussied up.
I did have work to do, sure. But, I also had a plan forming in my mind. He said he was bringing dinner home, so I wanted him to walk right into a scenario where he’d want dessert first. As I sipped my coffee, I made my way back inside. The first thing I needed to do was pick out an outfit. Then, I needed to go get my hair and nails done. After that, I could knock out some work, slip into my sexiest outfit, and wait for Brenden to get home.
Yeah. That’s what I’d do for him.
And, it’s what I’d do for myself.
20
_____
BRENDEN
I stared at Clint. “I’m telling you, these past three weeks have been phenomenal.”
He nodded. “Of course they have. You’ve had a crush on that girl for years.”
“No, no, no. Not like that. I mean, it’s just--.”
“Just what?”
I leaned back, sighing. “I’ve had all these girls, right? And they’re great. Really great girls. But, there’s something about Kelly I’ve always come back to.”
“She was the forbidden fruit.”
“Clint.”
He shrugged. “What? No use in not acting like you don’t have pride. You nailed the girl you haven’t been able to since college. I’d be happy myself.”
“It’s not like that, Clint.”
He threw a fry into his mouth. “Sure about that?”
I shook my head. “I knew you wouldn't get it.”
“What’s there to get? You two are living it up. That’s good. At least you’re not miserable obeying the judge’s orders.”
“Where's Zane again?”
He took a gulp of his soda. “Working late.”
I rolled my eyes. “Of course. You’d think he’d be home with his pregnant fiancé.”
“Oh, she’s with him. They were eating dinner when I left.”
“See? That’s what I’m talking about. Kelly and I jive like that. We’re totally okay with being anywhere or doing anything so long as we’re with one another. I’ve never had that before.”
He paused. “Are you saying you want to keep seeing her or something?”
“Yeah, man. I think I do.”
He shook his head. “You’re jumping into things way too quickly.”
“When the hell have I not done that?”
“You say she’s different, though, right?”
I nodded. “Right.”
“So, treat her differently if she’s, in fact, different. Don’t do the shitty thing and rush stuff only to have it explode all over your face. No one likes a random hot load in their face.”
I grinned. “You’d know, wouldn't you?”
He chuckled. “You’re damned right, I do. She let me make it up to her, too.”
“I can only imagine how you did that.”
He leaned forward. “By putting my next load in the right place.”
I snickered. “You’re a dog, you know that?”
He took a bite of his burger. “Of course, I know that. I know exactly who I am and--.”
I held up my hand. “Swallow, Clint.”
He gulped his food down. “I know exactly who I am, and that doesn’t bother me one bit. But, if you think you can meet some girl who’s different and treat her the same? Then, you’re just an idiot.”
“So, you’re saying I should keep up with this. Maybe ask her to keep staying with me after this whole thing is dissolved?”
“I mean, why not just stay married?”
“What?”
“Sure! You fucked her, you guys eat dinners together, you hang out on weekends. Why not just stay married and grow old together? Fuck courtship. You guys are already there.”
I blinked. “Stop being sarcastic.”
He laughed. “Finally. Took you a while to catch on.”
I groaned. “Okay. I’m done talking about this.”
“Dude. Brenden. You're my brother, okay? I’m not gonna lie to you or shit like that. But, you’re a bachelor. You had to set up an entire room for her that’s different than the rest of your place because you don’t live the life she wants to live.”
“That isn’t true. I could settle down and be a damn good husband.”
“But you don’t want to.”
“I might want to with her.”
“It’s fun right now because it’s new. You’re fucking some girl in a new atmosphere with a new problem, and it’s exciting. Like having sex in the back of your car for the first time. But, that newness will wear off, just like it does with all the other girls I’ve seen you cycle through. Then, what?”
I pushed my food away. “She’s different. This thing we have is different.”
He gulped his soda again. “Maybe it is. But, Kelly seems like a decent-enough girl. She doesn’t need to be tied up with a guy like you if you’re just going to continue being a bachelor.”
“I don’t want to be. Not with her.”
“Then, be sure about it. Otherwise, you’re stuck. Same sex, same woman, same routine, for the rest of your life. And the rest of your life is a very, very long time to go without touching another woman except her.”
I stayed quiet for the rest of our lunch, turning his words around over in my head. I figured Clint would’ve been more supportive of me than that. But, then again, he wasn’t about to become the family man.
I should’ve canceled and had dinner with Zane.
“Anyway,” Clint said as he wiped off his mouth, “I’ll pick up the tab. You just keep yourself out of trouble, all right?”
I nodded mindlessly. “Yeah.”
“Oh, you want one of their milkshakes? I love their salted caramel pretzel milkshake. I can’t get enough.”
“I’m good.”
“Yo
u sure?”
I slowly looked up at him. “I’m fine, Clint.”
He held up his hands. “Suit yourself. I’ll have them bring you a to-go box for your stuff.”
As he walked away from our table, my eyes gravitated outside. I saw the blinking signs of the casino across the street and figured I could use a bit of a distraction. After loading my food into the container and seeing Clint off, I left my food in my car.
I strolled across the street.
“Get the hell outta my way. It’s a fucking crosswalk, asshole!”
The car horn blared as I crossed the road, and I flicked them off. I didn’t give a damn how it made me look, either. People in Vegas were always so damn moody all the time. And it was times like that that I was jealous of Zane living outside of downtown Vegas. With my hands in my pockets, I strolled into the casino. One of the waitresses came over promptly to take my drink order while I scanned the tables. As far as my eyes could see, there were people playing poker. Blackjack. Roulette, and slots. There wasn’t a free seat in the fucking place at one o’clock in the afternoon on a Tuesday.
So, I took my drink from the waitress, tipped her, then started walking around.
“Hooray!”
“Here they come!”
“Oh my God, take pictures. Get your phone out. Hurry!”
I spun around as everyone in the casino stood and held their drinks in the air. I furrowed my brow as I watched the doors of the place burst open, revealing a very happy bride and groom. Everyone yelled and clapped. Some even whistled and hollered. The bride threw her bouquet into the crowd, and I heard women screaming while they reached for it, hoping to be the lucky woman to catch the falling flowers.
“I got it, I got it!”
Everyone clapped as the bride rushed over and hugged the woman holding the flowers. Men patted the groom’s back and handed him a drink. An older man with salted hair at his temples lit a cigar for the young man before shoving it between his lips. I sipped my drink as I made my way into a corner, trying not to detract from their moment.
And every time the couple looked at one another, I saw love in their eyes.
Kelly.
She was the only person I could think about as I threw back the rest of my drink. While the blushing bride kept hugging people, I kept envisioning Kelly in a beautiful, flowing white gown. I thought about the cigar Zane would want to share with me after being my best man at my wedding. Because I knew damn good and well, my father wouldn't give a shit. Or, more aptly, would find some reason for it to disappoint him.
Nonetheless, I couldn't stop daydreaming about Kelly and the kind of wedding she’d actually want.
“My stars, is that Brenden Hearthstone?”
The familiar voice pulled me from my trance, and I automatically wished I had another drink.
“It is, it is,” I said.
LaShonda sauntered in front of me before she plucked my empty glass from my hand. Before exchanging it with another drink that was identical to the one I had been sipping.
I chuckled. “How long have you been watching me?”
“Such a terrible word, ‘watching.’ Maybe I simply noticed you when you walked into a room. And I do know your habits, Brenden.”
“That’s very true.”
She giggled. “So, what are you doing crashing a wedding party?”
I paused. “You know the bride and the groom?”
Her hand fell against my chest. “Shows how much you remember from when we dated. That’s my sister, sweetheart.”
I paused. “Right.”
She patted me. “It’s okay that you forgot. I always thought that trait was endearing.”
“I’m sure you did.”
She stepped a bit closer to me. “So, what are you doing for the rest of your day? Got the day off work, by any chance?”
I threw the drink back with one swallow. “Actually, just coming off my lunch break.”
“So, I take it, that means you can’t stay? Maybe have a dance or two with me?”
I slipped away from her. “I need to head home.”
She followed me. “I thought you were heading back to the office.”
“I’m heading somewhere, yes.”
“Come on, stay with me. Just one dance. That’s all I’m asking.”
I set my glass down at the bar. “No, LaShonda. I have to go.”
She took my hand in hers. “Just one dance. And if you can honestly resist me after that, then I won’t ever pull you aside again.”
“Ever?”
She winked. “If you can resist me, that is. Though, if I remember correctly, that never happened.”
“LaShonda, I have to--.”
“This’ll be fun. Come on.”
And even as I tried to find an exit that wasn’t rude as hell during a wedding reception, I couldn't find one.
Just leave, Brenden. That’s all you have to do.
So, why did I have such a hard time doing it?
21
_____
KELLY
I paced the living room back and forth while trying not to look at my cell phone. I mean, sure, Brenden wasn’t home. But that wasn’t something to be concerned about, right? He was a big boy with his big boy business, and I’m sure he had a lot on his plate with projects and things.
Right?
“Come on, Kelly. He told you he’d be home for dinner and a movie.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose and sighed. I turned towards the massive windows in the living room and gazed out over Vegas. The sun had set. The stars were out. And we were supposed to be enjoying a movie on the couch together. But instead, I was here--alone--with our Thai food growing cold.
“Where the hell are you?” I grumbled.
I pulled my phone out of my pocket and crafted a text to Brenden. I wanted to know where he was and what time he’d be home because frankly… I was starving. And if something had come up at work, all he had to do was tell me.
But, I didn't get a response back from the message I sent off.
So, I called his brother.
“Hello?” Zane asked.
“Zane, it’s Kelly.”
“Oh, hey there. Everything all right?”
I heard Karina giggling in the background, and I furrowed my brow.
“Didn’t I call your office phone?” I asked.
He snickered. “You’re fine, it’s okay. I was just, uh, taking a break.”
Karina started giggling again, and I rolled my eyes.
“Ew, gross. Okay. Do you know where Brenden is?” I asked.
Zane chuckled. “Uh, wait. Wait, wait. Brenden? You don’t know where he is?”
“No. He hasn’t come home yet.”
“Karina, stop it,” he whispered. “Kelly, you there?”
“Yep.”
“Let me shoot you Clint’s number. Clint had lunch with Brenden today, and he never did make it back to the office. I thought he went home to work and spend time with you.”
“Well, he’s not here. So, I’d like that number. I’m worried about him.”
“Sure thing. Give me a second.”
He hung up the phone on me, and I almost called him back. Until his text rolled through with his older brother’s number. I shot off a quick ‘thank you’ before I dialed the number, hoping and praying that there was a logical explanation for all of it.
“Yeah?” Clint answered.
I blinked. “Clint?”
“Yep?”
“It’s Kelly.”
“Hey there.”
“Hey. Uh, listen. You had lunch with Brenden. Right?”
“Yep.”
“Have you seen him since then?”
“Why?”
I paused. “Because he’s not home yet, so you’re the last one to have seen him.”
“I mean, that’s not unusual. Sometimes, Brenden blows off work after lunch to drink and go play some slots.”
“Wait, he actually does that?”
“I mean,
yeah. He works hard. Why not?”
I shook my head. “Never mind. Any chance you might know where he is now?”
“Probably at his usual place.”
“That place got a name, Clint?”
“Yep. Lucky’s 8. We had lunch across the street.”
I sighed. “Thank you. I appreciate it.”
I ended the phone call abruptly and tossed my phone onto the couch. If that slimy little shit thought I was going to stand around and wait for him while he got drunk, gambled, and forgot our plans, then he had another thing coming. I shook my head as I pulled my Thai food out of the bag. I marched into the kitchen and threw it into the microwave, but I paused before I started it up.
Why should I stay here mad at him?
“When I could just go get him,” I murmured.
I abandoned my food and made my way for the elevator. I could have sworn that Brenden had turned over a new leaf. That we were building something special and amazing while we were cooped up with one another. But, if that was how Brenden thought things would be if we were together, he had another thing coming.
He doesn’t think you guys are together.
“Shut up,” I whispered to myself.
I didn’t know what to think. I didn’t know how to feel. All I knew was that Brenden and I had plans, and there was a possibility he’d thrown me to the side to get drunk. I hailed a cab and rattled off the name of the place, hoping and praying that Clint was wrong. Hoping and praying that Brenden was, literally, anywhere else right now.
“Please don’t be right. Please don’t be right. Please don’t be right.”
I softly chanted those words all the way to Lucky’s 8. I paid the driver before I headed inside, and the sheer amount of drunk people stumbling around me was insane. Glitter covered the floor. There was a half-eaten cake set up in the corner. Champagne was flowing, and the slot machines were glowing, and everyone around me seemed to be dressed to the nines.
“Are you with the bride or the groom!?”
One of the waitresses yelled at me to get over the noise, and I shook my head.
“Neither! I’m just looking for someone!”
“I can’t let you in, then. I’m sorry!”
I sighed. “Look, I’m only here for a little bit. I’ve lost someone, and I want to make sure they’re not here. That’s all.”
