"Sure," he said with a terse nod. "I get that. Let's go take a look at it, and you can tell me all about what you think."
It didn’t take a genius to see that he didn't really get it and that he was getting more annoyed by the moment. Normally that kind of thing hardly phased her, but for whatever reason, things were different with Austin.
She didn't want to think that it had anything to do with how handsome he was, but as she dutifully followed him out of the kitchen and down the hall, she couldn't deny it completely. Even with his rumpled clothes and hair, there was no denying that he was the hottest guy she had ever been in the same room with. He had been good looking when she was a kid, but he was more than that now. With his dark hair, brooding green eyes, and just the right amount of scruff, his looks bordered on devastating. She was dedicated to her job, and she was good at it, too, but she was already feeling off her game and being around Austin only seemed to be making things worse.
“Here we are,” he said, stopping so abruptly just inside of Lea’s room that Sara ran right into his back. He was grateful that Lea was still in the kitchen with her cartoons so she couldn’t see any of the awkwardness. “Might as well be at the scene of the crime while we have our conversation.”
"Sure," she said brightly, ignoring the crime comment. "I do have another question if you're up for it."
“Shoot,” he said, crossing his arms again and all but daring her to continue.
“I’m just curious about your day to day interaction,” she said, hoping he couldn’t hear the faint shaking of her voice. “Like how the two of you play, for instance.”
"Right," he said with a sigh. "Well, I'm really busy these days, truth be told. I inherited this ranch from my grandparents not too long ago, and I've been trying to fix it up."
“Okay,” she said slowly.
"I don't have as much time to just sit down and play with her as I'd like,” he said, knowing he sounded defensive. “Most of the time, she's just playing next to me while I work. I get it's not ideal, but it's the best I can do."
Sara bit her tongue, literally and metaphorically, and took a slow, steadying breath. She reminded herself that Austin wasn't seeing the ways in which she was trying to help him and Lea. He was only seeing attacks, not realizing that his defensiveness was hindering progress—a classic inability to see the forest for the trees. Even so, she felt her own annoyance growing with each tick of the clock's second hand. She had been dealing with attitudes like this for her whole career, and the question she came back to time and again was the same. Didn't these people understand that she was trying to help? And that she knew what she was talking about?
It had been the same way with her now ex-husband as well. He had never trusted her judgment, choosing instead to treat her like an invalid or a particularly incapable child. She was tired of people underestimating her and acting as if she didn't know what she was doing. She was tired of smiling and agreeing with them even when she knew they were wrong. For once in her life, she was ready to take a stand.
“Look, Austin,” she started, amazed at how firm she was able to keep her voice despite the hummingbird fluttering of her heart. “I’m not here to turn your entire world upside down. I want to make sure you know that.”
“Okay,” Austin said suspiciously, clearly waiting for the “but.”
"And I also want you to know that I'm aware that you want the best things for Lea. But I need you to try to trust me and to be a little open-minded when it comes to my methods and suggestions. This isn't the first time I've done this."
Austin flushed, and he opened his mouth to speak, likely to say something that would only inflame the situation further. Sara did her best to steel herself, prepared for any number of unpleasant responses.
“All right,” he said grudgingly, catching her off guard. “I’ll try. It’s clear that doing things my way hasn’t worked out the way I’d like, so what do you suggest?”
"Thank you," she said brightly, the surge of happiness she felt at his compliance almost bringing tears to her eyes. "How about, for starters, no more TV at mealtimes. Let's make that time for conversation."
“Whatever you say,” he agreed with a mock salute and the faintest hint of a smile. “You’re the boss.”
Four
Upon first arriving, Sara had been almost positive that she would never feel at home with her new situation. She was still far too raw from her recent failures, both professionally and in her personal life, to believe that anything might actually go right. To make matters worse, she felt like she was walking on eggshells around Austin, even though he had agreed to her line in the sand. It was plain to see that he would rather not have her there, something she fully intended to discuss with Rachel the next time the two of them spoke. She had a feeling that her old friend had put on the pressure to get her the position. The very thought of that mortified her, so much so that she would likely have quit if she didn't need the income so badly. As it was, she was acutely aware of her position, and she constantly felt like Austin was looking over her shoulder, adding to his list of reasons why this would never work.
Something funny began to happen as the days passed, though. Something she had never expected. Without even noticing it happening, she began to feel more at home. She developed an instant attachment to Lea, one significant enough that Sara looked forward to spending time with her when she got up in the morning. Although Lea hadn't started speaking yet, Sara was hopeful for a breakthrough sooner rather than later. Every day she was showing more interest in the conversation around her, and she had started using a lot of hand gestures to try and get her points across. Just to be hopeful about anything was a nice change, and it made her wonder if it might be worth it to start hoping about other parts of her life as well.
Things were going better with Austin than she’d expected, too. She wouldn’t go so far as to say that they were becoming friends, but a lot of the discomfort and tension between them seemed to have dissipated. He was still having a difficult time letting go of his control, she could sense that easily enough, but she didn't blame him for feeling that way. He was trying to learn how to be a father, and his instinct to protect had to be at an all-time high after Lea's distress at having been left by her mother. In this instance, his hovering was something she could empathize with, especially since they had their fondness for Lea in common, something that was making her smile as the two of them sat on the floor together, playing with a set of matching cards Sara had brought along.
“Oh!” Sara laughed when Lea reached up and put a hot little hand on Sara’s face. “I’m sorry, was my mind wandering?”
Lea nodded, her expression as stern as a teacher caught in the act of reprimanding her class. Sara laughed again and ruffled Lea's hair, which earned her another frown that quickly turned into a smile. It looked for a moment like Lea was going to start giggling as well, and Sara's breath caught in her chest. As delightful as she found Lea, which was very, she had yet to hear anything of her voice. The sound of her laughter was lovely, but to hear an actual word would be a much-needed victory. It was almost as if Lea sensed Sara's excitement, though, because her cheeks grew pink, and she looked shyly back at the cards, pointing to them emphatically. Sara had come to understand that this move meant "keep going," and she nodded, putting her serious face on but adding a little wink at the end to see if she could get Lea to laugh again. It didn't work, but Sara felt encouraged all the same, and it was with a renewed sense of determination that she went back to the game. She flipped over a card and gasped, then made an exaggerated show of being hungry.
“Look, Lea,” she said, guiding Lea’s hand to the card and helping her to trace the lines of its picture. “It’s an apple. Do you see how red and shiny it is? I don’t know about you, but it looks so yummy to me!”
Lea smiled again, although Sara could see that the lion's share of her attention was focused on which card would come next. She was so charged up by it that Sara couldn't help but feel the same way,
and she leaned in closer to the cards not yet taken, glancing at Lea curiously to see which one she would pick. When Lea pointed at her instead of at a card, Sara smiled softly and shook her head.
“It’s your turn to choose a card,” she said, resting a reassuring hand on Lea’s small shoulder. “And there’s no need to worry about which one you’ll pull; no worry at all. It’s just a game, right? If we don’t match it the first time, we’ll just keep trying!”
Lea hesitated for a moment and then nodded before turning the entirety of her attention onto the well-worn, slightly bent cards. Looking at how seriously Lea was considering her options filled Sara's heart with a surge of love so strong, it almost hurt. It always surprised her how quickly and easily she could come to love a child.
When Lea finally decided on a card, her hand hovering just above it, Lea looked up at Sara again. Her eyes were the same striking shade of green as her father's, and Sara's heart skipped a beat as she wondered what he might be doing now. She had half a mind to go and find him, to ask him if he wanted to join them for a little while and witness firsthand the way Lea was beginning to come out of her shell. She might have done so if she wasn't worried that she would be stepping on his toes by telling him what to do. That, and she had an uncomfortable, sneaking suspicion that her motivation was not just so he could spend time with his daughter…but so she could enjoy some eye candy. Seeing a seriously hot man every day was a serious perk of the job.
A very distracting perk, she admonished herself silently, shaking her head and turning her attention back to Lea and the cards.
“Oh, yay!” she cried, clapping when Lea flipped her card to reveal the matching apple. “You found the right card on the first try! You should be so proud of yourself.”
“Yummy apple,” Lea said gleefully, clapping along with Sara and bouncing up and down so excitedly that it was a wonder she didn’t topple over. “Yummy apple here!”
Sara was rendered momentarily speechless by the sweet, unexpected sound of Lea's voice. Then her body was flooded with adrenaline, and she had to make a conscious effort to keep from leaping to her feet and scaring the poor girl. It was no easy feat, either, because, for the first time in a very long while, she felt rejuvenated and a little more like herself. She had gotten so burned out working at the elementary school, with all its regulations and red tape, and now she felt like she was coming alive again.
"That's right," she said, her throat growing tight with emotion. "A very yummy apple, indeed. Why don't you flip the next card over while I get your daddy?"
“Okay,” Lea said, her face reverting back to that comical expression of concentration. She didn’t seem to have a clue how exciting her few words were, which was exactly as it should be, as far as Sara was concerned.
Still, she couldn't help from racing through the open door towards the sound of Austin working, frowning when she couldn't see him right off the bat.
“Austin!” she called, not quite a shout but almost. “Austin, I need you to come here, I--”
But before she could finish her sentence, she heard the sound of footsteps pounding on the creaky wooden floor. Seconds later, Austin came around the corner, his face pale beneath his tan and his eyes wide with worry. Although the hallway was on the long side, Sara could have sworn that he cleared it in three steps. If she listened hard enough, she was sure she would hear his heart pounding.
“What is it?” he asked urgently, peering into the room. “What’s the matter?”
“Oh, no,” Sara said quietly, instantly feeling guilty for frightening him. She risked a glance at Lea and was relieved to see that she hadn’t picked up on her father’s distress. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to freak you out. Nothing’s wrong.”
“Are you kidding me?” he asked, his brow furrowing with disbelief that she could tell would soon turn to anger. “Then what are you yelling for?”
“You’re right,” she said quickly, keeping her voice low in hopes that he would do the same. “Of course you are. It’s just that I was so excited. She…she spoke," Sara said simply. "We were using the matching cards, and she said ‘yummy apple.' It just felt like such a special moment that I thought you should be here for it, too."
The color returned to Austin's face all at once, and he made a strangled sound that was something between a laugh and a cry. Then, before she knew what was happening to her, he threw his arms around her and lifted her into the air.
Dimly, as if from someplace far away, Sara heard Lea giggling again, clapping her hands with every bit as much enthusiasm as she had shown for the yummy apple. As sweet as the sound was, though, Sara could hardly hear it. She was too caught up in the experience of being enveloped by Austin, surrounded by his scent, and his body heat seeping into her skin. It felt as though every nerve ending in her body had been stimulated at the same time, and when he let her go abruptly, it was all she could do to keep from reaching for him again.
“Sorry,” he stammered. “I don’t know what came over me.”
Austin stared at Sara, trying to wrap his head around what he had just done. Even in the best of circumstances, with people he had been close to all his life, he wasn’t an overly affectionate man, something Rachel had ribbed him about since they were small. But here he was, swinging Sara around like they were starring in their very own TV romance movie or something. He had no excuse for it, either, except to say that he was overwhelmed by joy for Lea’s progress, making him temporarily insane.
"Look," he said, shoving his hands in his pockets and forcing himself to meet her eyes. "I just got excited, but I shouldn't have done that. I know it's important to have boundaries and all."
“Please, don’t mention it,” Sara said with a smile, blushing prettily and looking up at him through long, dark lashes. “I totally get it. And I’m glad you’re excited. You should be! Consider it as though it never happened.”
He nodded in agreement, but as she hurried back to Lea's side, he was surprised to find himself not entirely content with the idea. It had been a long time since he had even thought of being with a woman. He had been pretty sure that Caroline had driven that desire out of him for good. Now, though, with Sara’s sweet scent lingering on his skin, he wasn't so sure. She felt good in his arms, as brief as the contact had been, good pressed up against his body. It made his mind wander to what it would be like to hold her under very different circumstances, and he cleared his throat loudly as if doing so could clear the wayward thoughts from his mind. He should be focused in on Lea at the moment, anyhow, seeing as this was the most progress her speaking had shown since she'd come to live with him.
"Hey, baby," he said happily as he joined Lea and Sara on the floor, careful not to touch Sara as he did so. "Miss Sara told me something really exciting just now. She told me you said ‘apple.'"
“‘Yummy apple,’ right, Lea?” Sara added with a sweet smile.
"That's right," Austin agreed, his heart began to speed up a little in anticipation. "I'm so proud of you for saying that, and I was wondering if you could do it again?"
He stopped, giving Lea time to comply, but she just looked up at him with shining eyes. He could feel Sara wanting to say something beside him, but at the moment, he didn't care what it was. Knowing that Lea was finally talking again, that she could still talk, made him want to hear her voice again more than ever before.
“What do you think, baby?” he tried again, getting a huge smile in return, but no words. “Can you say ‘apple’ again? ‘Yummy apple’?”
“Do you know what?” Sara said quietly, touching his arm and sending a not unpleasant jolt of electricity through his skin. “Maybe it’s better if we don’t pressure her to do it again so soon. Maybe we could focus on praising the accomplishment instead?”
“Sure,” Austin agreed, so happy with this newest development that he wasn’t even annoyed at being corrected. “I think I can manage that.”
Sara smiled at him, a wide, genuine smile. He smiled back and felt something warm and undefi
nable pass through them. It made him shiver, and he got to his feet quickly, determined to remove himself from the feeling of temptation. Out of all of the ways this summer could have gone, he hadn't considered the possibility that he would want her. He was determined not to let it interfere with her work, though, especially not if she was really helping Lea.
He headed into the kitchen, still silently lecturing himself about keeping things in perspective. Sara and Lea trailed behind him, with Sara chattering away to Lea as if the conversation were two-sided.
“Hey, I’ve got an idea,” Austin said, turning to look at them both before he went to the fridge. “What about a snack? Are you guys up for that? Say, some apples and cheese?”
Lea's eyes grew as wide as if he'd told her he was going to buy her a unicorn. She looked from him to Sara as if she could hardly believe her good fortune, and started clapping enthusiastically. That set Sara laughing, and pretty soon, all three of them were gripped by a serious case of the giggles. Lea's were mostly silent, but Austin didn't care. Just seeing her look so happy meant that he was over the moon.
Sara took it upon herself to prepare the snack, whipping up a lavishly designed tray that was far more impressive than anything Austin would have come up with. She designated Lea as her "special helper" and talked her through every step of every task. There was no evidence whatsoever that she was working on Lea's speech. Still, Austin had no doubt that was exactly what she was doing, and it left him in awe. He was starting to think he might have been a fool for so quickly jumping to the conclusion that her services wouldn't be needed. Still watching the two of them, he grabbed a bottle of sparkling cider out of the fridge.
"Here," he said, handing her a glass after Lea was settled at the table and eating happily. "I think we've earned this, don't you?"
“Really?” she asked, raising her eyebrows in surprise. “Don’t you think it’s a little early?”
The Rancher’s Tempting Nanny Page 3
