And before I end this note of warning there are two more quick lessons: 1) when you are drunk or on drugs, if he leaves you alone some place for any amount of time for any reason then you will be vulnerable to a total stranger kidnapping you and using you as a permanent sex slave for years and years or even murdering you.
So if a guy ever wants to get you drunk or high, no matter how young or old you may be, he is not looking out for your safety or happiness. and besides, just how safe are you anyway with a drunk date if a sober criminal comes along and beats up your weak (drunk) date to kidnap you anyway? 2) If a jerk doesn’t try to get you intoxicated then he’ll try and show you some porn to convince you that normal or cool women have sex with guys without being married to him first.
But most porn is a lie because every girl and nearly all women that are used in porn magazines and videos are often forced into it either by being kidnapped first or intoxication that results in kidnapping that results in these women being used as sex slaves (sometimes called “prostitutes”) for years and years and their family members often have trouble finding these missing females. It’s truly horrible.
And those few women that choose to sign contracts to be paid and used for sex videos often get tricked into signing vague agreements where the movie producer can change the rules whenever he wants so if he tells her to show up to film a sex scene with one guy he can change his mind and have her show up unprepared to be brutally abused and gang raped instead as a means of male entertainment for a different movie or video instead. Nearly all rape scenes in movies – even R-rated movies – are not fake.
And don’t expect anyone to ask her how she feels about it afterwards because, after all, she signed up for it. (People in the sex trade are basically sociopathic. They don’t care about anyone’s welfare or satisfaction. They only care about their own selfish wants and financial greed to profit off of her pain and suffering.)
Jerk Rule #2: Jerks will tell a girl anything and everything she wants to hear in order to convince her to have sex with him – the kind of sex that the guy wants when he wants it. Jerks don't really care about what she wants. Jerks think that girls will believe anything – especially if he tells her “I love you.”
Once she’s given him the sex he wants, when he gets tired of her he just dumps her and does the same thing all over again to get a different girl to have sex with him until he gets tired of her too.
Most guys want sex with a variety of different women. Lots of us believe the lie that sex with just one woman is boring. (The lie basically is there to convince guys that marriage is boring. But I believe that's got to be a lie since the happiest guys I know have been married to the same woman for decades and decades.)
Jerk's Goal: Since Godless guys (those that actually hate righteousness even though they may verbally deny such) love the idea of having pre-marital sex – especially really perverted or “experimental” sex – with a whole bunch of different girls instead of the same girl, this trick is common with most guys. The idea is that he will smooth talk a girl to make her believe she’ll enjoy sex with him.
But the fact that most guys either don’t talk about the truth of what a woman really enjoys in sex (or are just too selfish to think about what she actually likes as opposed to the lies the porn industry spreads about what a woman likes) is the fact that most often, guys don’t care about a young woman’s comfort or pleasure nearly as much as they think of their own.
So most young ladies have the same complaint after sex with a guy: that it really hurt her physically (some girls actually cry but he won’t stop – even if she is bleeding) or that it wasn’t as exciting or fun as she thought it would be.
This is because guys just want to satisfy themselves first and foremost and they don’t want to believe the fact that females are satisfied sexually in ways that are much more different than guys realize. Or, to be frank, putting something in any female’s orifices just isn’t as pleasant for females as guys want to believe.
Plus men often want to try a bunch of different sexual positions that don’t involve having the woman lying on her back on a comfortable bed (the most physically comfortable and satisfying position for most women) which also proves that most of the sex men want is focused on satisfying men since men can enjoy sex in far many more different positions than a woman can.
Men also think sex is mutually fulfilling when it’s fast and only lasts a few minutes even though women often enjoy it much more when it's slow and lasts for much longer than men plan on (since women can enjoy it for literally over an hour or longer when a man is focused just on her instead of on himself). Women may speak the truth about these matters but guys feel insulted when what women say actually turns out to be true.
Most of the lies about sex that us guys believe are lies started by the porn industry and perpetuated by selfish guys that make up fake stories about their own sexual experience with a woman or what they heard about from someone else.
And, sadly, some females that were sexually abused as children often perpetuate sexual myths more as a means to satisfy the guy(s) they date or are married to that abuse them as adults (although these women have been taught to believe that it’s not abuse even though it really is).
And where do us guys get these terrible and selfish ideas from that ultimately hurt girls and women? Movies, music, porn, television, the internet, social networking, magazines, plenty of adults that set a bad example, terrible dads or too many bad older brothers or guys from school or friends from school (if not their dads) or most often a combination of it all.
Legal Guesses: although it’s ethically wrong for a guy to lie to a woman to get her to believe he really loves her so she’ll have sex with him, I'm pretty sure it's not illegal to lie to someone about whether or not you really love them.
Health Issues: the same health concerns from Jerk Rule #1 apply here so the next couple of sentences are reminders because it’s important. In addition to this guy giving you one or more lifelong S.T.I.s he can get you pregnant and abandon you afterwards.
If he’s too “big” (especially if he... for lack of a less graphic choice of words... “abuses” your rectum) or if he tricks you into meeting him alone someplace he can rape you even if you aren’t drunk or in a worse case scenario he may have a friend that rapes you with him.
But even if it’s “consensual” sex, most young women are “small” which means you can suffer a lot of physical damage where you would need special medical care to help you heal and you’ll likely be in a lot of pain for possibly many days afterwards.
Basically everything about marriage to a good woman is to help teach a man to have consideration for others; to teach us guys to be sympathetic to the feelings, sufferings, needs and concerns of others.
These lessons are often not taught by men to other men. It takes a good woman to do it and to do it effectively so that we actually care and become more selfless in service to others.
If us guys can't learn to restrain ourselves well sexually before marriage then we'll be terrible at restraining ourselves during marriage when our wife isn't in the mood or doesn't have time or good health for sex.
Christ himself taught that the greatest among us will be a servant. The principle being that selfless service is more God-like than masters that demand to be served.
Overall, sex at a young age – especially before marriage – most often comes with a high emotional cost (damages), social costs, physical costs and certainly spiritual costs that can leave you devastated when it’s not a pleasant experience. (And heartache from lies and broken promises is never a pleasant experience.)
Waiting until you're married to have sex is the best way to enjoy it and avoid a ton of pain and heartache. Because most of us guys are generally selfish (not good) and most women are selfless (very good), the strongest influence on a man is his wife and it's the good influence of women that teaches us men how to be better at doing good such as being more selfless like you.
When we focus more on satisfying a woman the right way in relationships and marriage (emotionally, spiritually, physically, sexually etc) then she'll be happier because we men are becoming less self-absorbed and most men I know prefer to have a truly happy wife.
Lessons to be learned: you can never trust what any person says unless their behavior matches what they say. If a guy says that he loves you then if he really does love you then he will wait to have sex with you until after he marries you (“waiting” is a clear example of behavior – good behavior).
Not touching a girl inappropriately is another example of respectful or good behavior. Otherwise, a guy will say anything to push you into having sex early in a relationship.
Or realize he's pushing both of you into trouble if he won’t say much but his hands just start wandering to touch you sexually on places on your body that he should not or start removing your clothes so he can see your nakedness (inappropriately wandering hands is a clear example of behavior – sexual behavior or, in my opinion, bad behavior when it's with anyone other than one's lawfully wedded spouse).
And the ones that just want to push you for sex are the same ones that will want to be alone with you late at night and almost definitely past whatever your curfew is. Those are the guys that are jerks. They often hide their jerk ways behind smiles and lots of promises they don’t plan on keeping.
The guys that are the most trustworthy are the well behaved ones.
How do you recognize the well behaved ones? They are the good guys that don’t joke about sex all of the time, they don’t show you porn or talk about sex or talk about porn or ask you too often about sexual questions. They know that porn kills love.
Well behaved or “good guys” don’t insult women or girls and they don’t crack sexual jokes that portray women or girls in a slutty or pornographic way. They definitely do not hit women or use their greater male physical strength against women. They applaud and protect the moral strengths of good women.
Good guys don’t have a temper and they don’t get angry easily. Trustworthy or good guys don’t introduce you to sexual music and they don’t try to get you intoxicated. Most good guys don’t use a lot of foul language – if any at all.
Good guys actually talk more about good things, non-sexual things and yet they know sex is good when you’re married and only leads to heartache and pain when sex is experienced before marriage or with someone other than your lawfully wedded spouse.
Good guys think highly of women and speak highly of women and are not offended by the fact that most females set a better example in moral and spiritual issues than guys do.
Good guys also love their mothers and no matter how many times you ask him over the course of your friendship or dating about what he thinks of his mom, he’ll always say good things about her.
Good guys take things slow when dating and are not always trying to get you alone. Good guys ultimately care more about how things may affect you more than what the guy might get from someone.
Good guys care more about your happiness and well-being as their girlfriend or wife than their own. Good guys put your needs and comfort before their own. Good guys care very much about how their decision and other people’s choices affect you and your life.
Good guys are much more considerate of other people than jerks are. Jerks are often selfish. Good guys are not so selfish. Good guys like to do what their girlfriend likes to do.
Jerks don’t value tenderness but instead they mock it. Good guys value tenderness for the civility it provides families and society towards greater peace and happiness.
Jerks often hate God but good guys – especially the really good ones – go to church every Sunday. Church is the best place, second only to the home, where we learn to care more for others than we do for ourselves.
God teaches us to love and serve one another and moms often teach the same lessons to their children (especially in the way us boys need most: by lots and lots and lots of repeat lessons).
Jerks don’t want to love and serve others. Jerks want others to serve them.
Good guys are cool guys. Jerks may have a reputation for being cool but it’s a lie. Jerks are basically bullies and bullies are never cool.
When husbands treat their wives gently then these same men become more civilized. When guys are not properly trained at very early ages with lots and lots and lots of repetitive lessons, or when guys are not properly motivated to treat women with the proper respect and tenderness, then civility in society comes to an end.
Jerk Rule #3 : When all else fails when a jerk tries to get a girl alone to use her or abuse her for sex, jerks often go back to the Jerk's Rules 1 & 2.
Ultimately, when it comes to the subject of dating, love and family, one thing I know for sure: being open to the influence of a good woman – even being open to the average woman (especially if she’s a mother) – will almost always make people better than they were before, but being open to the influence of the average man will almost always make people worse than they were before.
There is opposition in all things. There’s good and there’s bad. There’s warm and there’s cool. There’s light and there’s dark. There is woman and then there is man. Not all guys are bad but the ones that are and that refuse to change to be good long-term are the ones that you should avoid.
But don’t despair because we good guys do exist even though sadly some of us may either be ashamed to show we’re good guys or because we don’t stand out as much by drawing trouble and bad attention to us as often as jerks draw attention to themselves.
Okay. So this is definitely a record breaker for long notes from me. But since I’m writing this from home I can spare the time.
You’re an amazing young woman I feel privileged to have as a good friend. You're especially attractive for lots of reasons like the fact that you dress modestly, you don’t have tattoos or body piercing (neither do I) and you don’t cuss or insult people. More than anything else those things make you much, much more attractive than the girls that have tats and body piercing and don't dress modestly.
You even like AlexOpalstone.com and the patriotic site TheBlaze.com. That is so cool!
Tons of people love TheBlaze.com – probably because the TV and radio shows are both hilarious and educational and hosted by a guy and his friends that stand for truth and integrity in journalism which is almost completely gone from like 95% of news today.
The guys on those shows make me laugh so hard sometimes! I love it!
Their shows are different than most news shows. They don't trash good guys like so many other news shows do. There's a song from the 1980s about how much of the news industry here in the U.S. prefers to talk about the dirty laundry or problems of other people but not to help them. That's what most news stations have been all about for the last fifty years or so. News editors like to kick the good guys (and good women) when the good guys are down or when they are up by spreading lies about them. But they rarely do the same with bad guys or bad women.
And the fact that you told me your parents have a subscription to the Blaze TV makes me think guys (cool guys) will like you even more since any teen that watches the Blaze TV is pretty cool. (My parents have a subscription to it too so that our family has the truth about what’s up in Washington.)
But I can also see how a guy would really like you since not only have you read the AlexOpalstone.com free chapters preview of the book by T.M. Meek, but you like Alex and the story so much that you actually even have a black and white checkered backpack like Alex does.
You’re smart enough to see how adults that use the news and the internet to insult stuff like that are adults that don’t care about if kids grow up to become poor for the rest of their lives.
You’re also smart enough to see that if teens don’t learn what only AlexOpalstone.com teaches then teens like us are nearly guaranteed to be poor and victims of deceptive financial myths than had we learned the truth an
d became prosperous as adults.
I’ve read the AlexOpalstone.com free chapters preview of the book by T.M. meek and I absolutely love it! So the guy that likes you I’ll bet likes Alex Opalstone a lot too.
If it turns out that you’re dating someone, be careful. If any guy breaks your heart, I’ll be inclined to do much more harm to him than to kick him in the butt in front of a mirror.
Have a great day!
Later!
Me
[8th anonymous note put in your locker.]
February 14
I wonder what you think of when you look out a window. Do you think of the worries of the day? Do you think of a loved one far away? Do you think of God?
I wasn’t much of a praying guy before I met you. Now I pray for you. I pray for your happiness, your safety, and your loved ones. I thank God that He can do things for you that as an imperfect human I can’t. I thank God for you.
Do you have dreams? Aspirations? Lofty ambitions? It would be an amazing privilege to help you achieve your heart’s desires.
Do you hear the voices of the day that compare your weaknesses to someone else’s strengths? It would be a joy to point out for you that such comparison can thankfully be of little negative effect as you focus more on your strengths that were once weaknesses.
Love Letters from a Teen Heartthrob Page 6
