by Dean Murray
I called Bethany from the road, knowing full well she was at work and wouldn’t answer. I left her a voicemail letting her know that I’d be staying at Cole’s for at least the next two weeks, but that we needed to set up some lunch dates in the interim. I also gave her a quick synopsis of the Aidan situation, just saying that we had a fight and I wasn’t sure where it was going now. As I went to hang up, I found myself saying, “You know I love you, girl. Take care of yourself.” It was if I were saying goodbye everywhere I went.
Chapter 16
Cole’s apartment was a palace in comparison to mine. He lived just a few blocks from the gym and his living room was a wall of windows that faced the ocean. There were worse places to be stuck and I decided I should make the best of it. His dog, Charlie, a Great Dane, met me at the door. Charlie was absolutely a lover, not a fighter — even if he sat over three feet tall and weighed one-hundred and seventy pounds. He nosed his way into my arms, making me drop all of my bags as I laughed and gave him a full-on hug.
I knelt in front of him and loved him up, paying special attention to his ears, which he loved. Once I was covered in dog hair and slobber, I stood and told him to go lay down. Instead, Charlie promptly sat down and cocked his head at me. He was black and white spotted, but his head was all white except for the giant black spot covering his right eye and his big ears stood up in giant triangles. I couldn’t help but tell him how pretty of a boy he was as I scratched his head again and took off for the guest bedroom.
By the time Cole got home, I was pretty settled in. I’d talked to Bethany, reassuring her that Charlie was fine, he just needed some shots every day for the next few weeks that Cole didn’t have time for. I told her he was paying me to dog-sit and that she was welcome to come hang out. Since Cole had some protective measures in place, apparently an “I owe you” from someone he had met during his travels, he felt like his apartment was the safest place any of us could be right now. I’d caught up on my homework and checked my phone no fewer than forty times to see if I’d missed a message from Aidan. I couldn’t bring myself to call or text him. After the way we’d ended things, he needed to be comfortable with telling me he was ready to see me again. If he ever was.
Cole kicked off our arrangement by reiterating all of his rules. Again.
“Do your own dishes. Don’t throw towels on the floor. Keep your girly crap in your own space. Don’t touch my PlayStation.” I couldn’t help but roll my eyes as he towered over me, ticking them off each of his fingers as he stood just in front of the couch.
“Really, Cole? I’ve been here before, and you’re the one who wants me here, so chill out, okay?” He harrumphed and went to put in the frozen pizza we were sharing for dinner. I could tell he was trying to act normal, but there was still a definite wariness in him.
I followed him into the kitchen, leaning on the granite island countertop and fiddling with the vase filled with spatulas and other cooking utensils.
“So, are you ever going to tell me about your guy?” I tried to fake disinterest, but Cole saw right through me. “Nope. Sorry, Ame, but you get nothing. This is top secret and I’m not joking when I say that no one can know this guy exists. He’s been off the radar for years.”
I rolled my eyes. “This is all a little too cloak and dagger, don’t you think?”
He stopped, the oven door half open. “I’m serious, Amelia. No one. Not even your little boyfriend, Aidan. Speaking of, what’s the deal there? I’m afraid to ask, but I should probably know what he knows about you? I mean, not about you. You know what I mean!” He rushed through that last part, turning an adorable shade of red.
I couldn’t help but egg him on. “Oh, you didn’t want to know how our first kiss went? I mean, I can tell you exactly how he—”
“NO! BLECH. Just, no.” Cole was walking around the kitchen, shaking himself out like he had caught cooties. Reacting to his weird antics, Charlie joined in the game, letting out thunderous woofs and jumping all over Cole.
“Good God. Down! Charlie, get down!” Cole was pushing at Charlie, which of course Charlie only saw as escalating the game. I, on the other hand, doubled over in laughter. Cole seemed so big and strong until his mammoth dog started to play games, too.
“Fine. I’ll take your word for it, Cole, but I need to get out of here for a few minutes. Can I take Charlie out to the beach? He looks like he could use a good game of fetch.” I put on my best pouting face and Cole gave in as I knew he would.
“Fine,” he agreed. “After we eat. I’m going to sit out on the deck and watch to make sure nothing happens. Stay within yelling distance.”
Just in time, the buzzer went off and our favorite sausage and green pepper thin crust pizza was done. I devoured my half, wishing he had stocked Cherry Pepsi, too.
Charlie couldn’t have been more ecstatic when I grabbed his leash out of the hall closet. We stood facing each other and it was clear to me that we both understood the leash was a formality. Charlie could drag me along the boardwalk for a hundred miles and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it.
“Alright, dog, we have an understanding, but know that I could also turn you into a goldfish if you misbehave.” Charlie actually snorted at me, as if to say, “Yeah right, lady. Nice try.”
With that, I laughed and shook my head, clipped on his leash, and let him lead me down to the beach. Once we were fully out in the sand, I let him loose and started throwing his favorite Frisbee around. The sun was just setting and the water looked radiant. The oranges, reds, and purples shone across the ocean surface with only the white swells breaking the beautiful rainbow.
Charlie and I must have played for an hour. Finally, I sat in the sand and he laid down next to me. He crossed his two front paws, looking more regal than I’d ever seen, his ears alert and looking all over the beach. I looked back to see Cole on the deck — actually sitting somewhat similarly to Charlie — his posture rigid, his eyes scanning the beach. It felt good to feel safe and protected, even if I was lonely.
Cole let me go to school, but Micah had to walk me to and from each class. I felt ridiculous, but I wasn’t there to learn. I was there to find Aidan. I needed to talk to him and I was becoming somewhat frantic. I alternated between feeling like I needed to spill it all and confess everything and completely ignoring him because it would be safer for him to never have met me. But, each time I walked into class, he wasn’t there.
As I finished out the week, glad Bethany had never questioned why Micah was on campus every minute we were, I prayed Aidan would be sitting there. Even if all we did was ignore each other, he needed to be there so I knew that he was okay. The more I thought about it, I realized that, while his car was gone, I hadn’t seen or heard from him since he took off into the woods. I had no idea if he was safe or dead. What if the red-haired woman somehow got to him and I wasn’t home to get her ransom?
Good grief. Get it together, Amelia. I was annoying myself with all of the “what if’s” rattling around my brain.
I refused to just ask Micah myself, instead I texted Bethany. What are best friends for, if not to stalk your maybe-ex and get details you aren’t privy to? In just a few messages, she agreed to push Micah for some information on their dinner date tonight, not even questioning the situation further. There was something to be said for a friend that just acted without asking a zillion questions.
I was cuddling on the couch with Charlie late that night — which actually meant he was taking up three-fourths of the couch and I was relegated to the inside corner — watching King Arthur and distracting myself with the gorgeous Clive Owen, when Bethany messaged me back.
Hey, Ame! Talked to M. He said A is fine, just has “stuff” going on. Tried to dig further but didn’t get anywhere. Boys. ;-)
I quickly responded. OK, great! Thanks for checking.
I know she wanted to keep digging, but Aidan’s business was his. If I couldn’t be honest with him, it wasn’t fair to expect him to be honest with me.
&nb
sp; I was lost in my own thoughts when Charlie suddenly bolted off the couch, barking non-stop. He ran in circles around the apartment as if he wasn’t sure what he was upset with. I realized I was sitting in a living room surrounded on two sides by windows and switched off the lamp sitting next me while I slid to the ground. Before I had a chance to hit Cole’s speed dial, I heard Micah’s voice come from the other side of the door as he knocked.
“Amelia? I know you’re here. It’s Micah. Can you do something about that dreadful animal?” I stood up, turned the light back on, and mentally berated myself for being such a scaredy-cat.
I tried telling Charlie to stop barking, but he was still losing it, scratching at the front door relentlessly. There was no way I could move him myself, so I hollered to Micah to wait a minute. I tried pulling on his collar, yelling for him to lie down, and tossing treats into the living room. Finally, I’d had it and screamed his name as loud as I could, putting a little extra oomph behind it. Immediately, Charlie came and sat down in front of me. I stooped down, grabbed his collar, and looked him in the eyes. Without speaking out loud I said, That’s enough. Micah is our friend. Go lay down. Now. He didn’t hesitate, trotting off to his giant dog bed in the corner. I blew a strand of hair out of my face, briefly closed my eyes, and stood to open the door, finding Micah leaning against the frame, a smug smirk on his face.
“Well done, Amelia. I think you’ve got a magic-sensing creature living with you, but you handled him well enough for a newbie.” I was still trying to comprehend what Micah had just said as he breezed past me and took a seat at the island.
“Come on in,” I muttered to the empty space where he’d been standing. I closed the door and joined him in the kitchen.
“What brings you here? Weren’t you on a date?” I grabbed a few bottles of water from the fridge and tossed him one. He slowed it down in the air and it landed gently on the counter in front of him.
“Show off,” I said with a scowl.
He gave me a feisty grin as he twisted the cap off. “Indeed I was, but I just dropped Bethany at her apartment and wanted to speak with you as soon as possible. As we’ve talked about, I have been looking into these people who attacked you and Aidan. I haven’t learned much, but it appears they are outcasts. They belong to groups of people who have rescinded themselves from the monarchy and now live in factions all over the world. It’s unclear what their objectives are, but they hate the queen, that much I know.”
“I suppose I can’t blame them,” I said with a shrug, forcing myself not to react with the disdain I had for the woman and her stupid betrothal. “She doesn’t exactly seem like the nicest lady and she’s got a pretty ridiculous agenda.”
“Amelia, do you know anything about what the monarchy has been through? Do you have any idea what the queen has faced? Or do you judge her only based on the ramblings of some old Mage around your childhood campfire?” I watched Micah’s face redden with anger and the aura of the room changed.
I bit my lip, trying to distract myself from the magical reaction I was having to his defensiveness. My breath stuck in my lungs and a nervous fear snaked its way into my system.
“Whoa, down boy!” I said as I raised both of my hands and backed away, trying to inject some sarcasm and lighten the mood for both of us. “Believe it or not, I’ve heard from a few more credible sources than that, but I’ll admit to not being super-knowledgeable on the subject of the queen’s issues. What’s your deal? Are your parents BFF’s with her or something? I’ve never seen you so fired up.”
As I asked the question, he immediately started back-peddling. “Of course not, Amelia. I am merely pointing out that you shouldn’t speak without a solid factual basis. You never know how your words could be construed or who is listening. If the queen truly is the tyrant you believe, then you could be jailed for even speaking against her.” His smirk tried to tell me he was joking, but every other signal contradicted his attempt.
I nodded. “I suppose you’re right. Anyway, did you figure out the mystery woman’s name?” I wanted to get back on track. Though I was still curious about Micah’s outburst, I had bigger issues.
“We believe her name is Melinda Carusso. I only had your brief description to go from, but that in combination with the magical abilities you detailed, fit with the profile of a woman who is a known rebel. She hates the queen, defies her at every turn, and isn’t afraid to hurt people to make her point. She’s very dangerous and you need to tell me right away if you hear from her again, Amelia. Do you understand?”
I paused, the water bottle mid-way to my mouth, and turned to face Micah. “To hurt people? And, by people, you mean me, right? You are telling me that this crazy chick hates the queen and has somehow decided hurting me is going to get her somewhere? Have you lost your mind? I’m nothing! And, why do you need to know? What aren’t you telling me?” His demands made me sure he knew Melinda was an AniMage, but how could he possibly?
Micah just stared. For what felt like an entire minute, he just stared at me. I could feel our connection niggling at my mind and snapped at him, “If you have something to say, just say it. I’m not letting you in.” His head snapped back a little, as if he were surprised I could feel his approach.
“Yes, Micah, I felt that,” I said, scowling. “And I don’t appreciate you trying to come in uninvited. So knock it off.”
“Amelia, are you sure that you’ve told me everything that’s happened?” Micah looked at me quizzically. Either he knew I knew about Melinda, or I wasn’t supposed to feel him coming. Damn it all to hell, I was sick of not knowing which powers I was supposed to have and which ones I wasn’t. I was sick of lying. I was sick of it all.
I groaned. “Yes, Micah,” I said, trying my best to sound exasperated. It wasn’t hard, he just didn’t realize why I was so annoyed. “Why? What did I do now?”
He shook his head, but I could tell he wasn’t pleased. “Nothing. Just…nothing. Look, I need to be going. Cole explained that you are leaving for the weekend. Take the dog. I don’t know what he is, but it’s clear he can sense power. It might come in handy since you both seem to have a hard time focusing.”
“Uh, yeah, thanks. I’ll make sure we do that.” Of course, only Micah could be insulting while he was trying to be helpful.
I walked him to the door and as I went to close it behind him, Micah turned back and reached in to stop me, putting his hand on the door frame. “Amelia, I think there’s more to this than we understand. I don’t know what it is, but I’m going to find out. You need to pay attention. You need to be careful. You need to trust me.”
His eyes were imploring. In that moment, I wanted to tell him everything. But, that meant truly trusting him and I couldn’t take the chance. “I think so, too, Micah. And I do trust you — as much as I know how.” I’d told him just a little about how I grew up, so my statement wasn’t out of place. I put my hand over his on the door frame, hoping to convey that I was genuine even while internally questioning. He just gave me a small nod and walked away.
As I walked back into the living room and sat down on the couch, I realized that was the first time I’d gone for more than an hour without thinking of Aidan.
It was finally too much. I’d been sitting there, in the dark, staring at the wall for too long. Since I realized I hadn’t been thinking of Aidan, it seemed like it was all I could do. I had picked up and set down my phone twenty times. I had gotten as far as opening our last text string but couldn’t bring myself to type anything. What was there to say? But, I had to say something. So, I finally did. I held my breath the entire time.
Hi. I know you probably never want to see me again, but I wanted to tell you I’m sorry. I’m leaving with Cole this weekend. Take care.
There was so much more I could have told him. That I thought I could love him. That his arms were the safest place I’d ever been. That I’d give anything for him to kiss me — even if it were just good-bye.
I sat on the couch, buried under a flannel bl
anket with Charlie at my feet, and let the tears stream down my face. There were no sobs. There were no hysterics. I just cried for the things I would never have. For the reality that I could not choose my life and even though I kept trying to downplay the situation, it was serious. Someone was trying to hurt me. Still, Aidan was the only thing that mattered. I didn’t want to want him, but it was like choosing not to breathe. It just wasn’t possible. My soul kept fighting for him like my lungs would for air.
Chapter 17
Far too early for my liking, Cole was pounding on my door. “Up and at’em, Amelia! We’ve got places to go and people to see!”
He was way too damn happy for 6:00 a.m. on a Saturday.
“Come on, come on!” he yelled. I then heard massive paws thundering around the apartment. Clearly, Charlie took that command as a challenge and a fierce tug of war game had ensued. Realizing I would never win this battle — and that I wanted to meet this mystery man — I resigned to getting up.
I had packed my bags last night once I pulled myself together. I checked my phone again and there was still no response from Aidan. Not knowing who exactly we were meeting, I took a little more care with myself. I put on a flowing teal skirt, silver gladiator sandals, and a white sleeveless top. I sent a little zing through my system, trying to get my brain in gear while also removing the puffiness around my eyes from crying. It was only twenty minutes by the time I joined Cole, but he already had coffee in to-go mugs, our bags sitting by the door, Charlie’s pail of food, and he promised me breakfast burritos on the way out of town.
“Are you ready for this?!” He gave me a poke in the shoulder, looking far too jovial for my non-caffeinated state. I took my first sip, showing no expression as I slowly swallowed, as if just that tiny bit of coffee would make all the difference. As if it could dull the ache that was slowly spreading through me, sapping any happiness one draining ounce at a time.
