by Cherrie Lynn
It wasn’t Iris’s place to get in the middle of things. But whatever else she was, Heidi had been good to her. Maybe Iris’s side job on this tour was getting him to see that the mother of his children wasn’t such a bad person. High-maintenance, maybe. Selfish at times, okay. But who was perfect? No one. Certainly not him, certainly not Iris.
Then again, Iris only worked for Heidi; she’d never had to be married to the woman. None of this is my business. Only the kids. Only they are my business. But only good could come of creating a stable atmosphere for those boys.
“Her only motive that I’m aware of is to make sure Seger and Dylan are okay, Mr. Vance.”
“Cut the ‘Mr. Vance’ shit.”
Mr. Jackass. How about that? “Okay.”
“When I’m with my kids, I got it. I don’t want to see you. I don’t want to hear you. I don’t need fucking supervised visits. That was never a part of our divorce agreement.”
“Understood. But—”
“Understand this. If Heidi’s so fucking worried about what I’m doing, she can come herdamnself. Not that there’s a fat chance in fuck of that happening, but your being there and on her payroll is the next worst thing.”
“I’m not your enemy. I’m not trying to be.”
“You’re damn sure not my friend.”
Iris swallowed past the nervous lump in her throat. She couldn’t say she’d ever been shut into a room with an angry, ranting rock star before. And she didn’t have to be. This was her boss’s house. It wasn’t his. Not anymore. But she had to find some way to get along with this man for the next two months. She wasn’t sure she knew how to do it. Her specialty was kids, not their jerkwad parents. “Okay, well, I think this conversation is over. We obviously aren’t going to reach an agreement on things today.”
“That’s probably the only thing we agree on.” He turned for the door and snatched it open, strode out into the foyer. Iris practically ran after him, feeling she could breathe again for the first time since he’d shut them into the dark-paneled room. No sooner had she crossed the threshold than the front door opened, and Heidi’s boyfriend strolled in as if he owned the place. The two men came practically face-to-face.
Oh . . . fudge.
After years in the business, Nicolas Steele was Hollywood’s darling up-and-comer. Iris could scarcely believe she was, at this moment, standing in a room with two very famous men. Two men who might come to blows if the animosity building between them reached a boiling point. Iris could practically cut the tension with a knife, but just as she was about to flee upstairs for Heidi’s intervention, Eli broke eye contact with the shorter man, drew a deep breath, and turned for the living room. “Boys.” His voice sounded strained. “Go get your stuff.”
Nic glanced at Iris and gave her a wink, as if to say it was all good. She smiled at him and bolted for the front door. Get me the heck out of here.
Her silver SUV sat in the wide circular driveway, and she all but sprinted to it, escaping into the silent sanctuary. It was one of her favorite places to be, in her car, and she didn’t care if that was a little weird. Sometimes, she just liked to drive. Far. Away from everything. She would go around the country if she could, sightseeing. And then it occurred to her that she was getting that chance in a way, even if she wasn’t the one behind the wheel. She would definitely miss her vehicle.
People around all the time. Elijah Vance around all the time. God, could she do this?
As she was thinking it, he walked out of the house with his kids, laughing. Dylan had jumped onto his back, arms wrapped around his neck, giggling wildly as he got a piggyback ride. Seger sauntered along behind them with that exasperated eleven-year-old distaste. For the first time since she’d laid eyes on him today, Eli looked happy, carefree, and the transformation was a miraculous one. She would never have thought this was the same man she’d faced in that study barely five minutes ago, all thunder gone from his expression. And he was damn good-looking when he smiled that way, his eyes crinkling up at the corners, dimples digging boyishly into his cheeks.
Iris sucked in a breath and cast her eyes down to her lap, lest he spot her and think she was spying again. She fished her phone out of her bag and sat staring blindly at it until she heard the muffled sounds of him and the boys getting into his ‘67 Mustang Fastback: voices fading, doors slamming. She watched the matte black car—one of many mint condition classics Iris knew he owned, this one murdered out—purr its way around the circle and finally disappear down the driveway.
She almost wanted to follow, to get a firsthand peek at how he really was with the kids, far away from the stresses of his ex-wife and her lover, but that wasn’t a great idea.
She would get her chance soon enough.
Three
Elijah watched Dylan cannonball into the pool and wondered how he’d gotten so lucky.
They’d had their ups and downs over the last few years. But hearing his kids’ laughter now made everything worth it. They’d gone to a movie, played some video games, even had a little batting practice at the cages. Seger had worked on his pitching. Kid had a cannon on him. Now the sky was ablaze with orange and pink and Elijah was tired, but it was a pleasant tired. He wished he could borrow a little of his sons’ energy for the tour—they were still going strong: swimming laps, diving, running, roughhousing. Eli was kicked back on the patio making sure they didn’t drown each other.
Now, away from the heaviness of his old house and the memories it held, out here in the warm early summer air where he could breathe, he was almost ashamed he’d been such an asshole to the nanny today. She’d looked scared to death, and whatever orders Heidi had given, it wasn’t Iris’s fault. He might even have been feeling generous enough to apologize to her, but he damn sure didn’t care to call Heidi to get her number . . . even though that would make his ex-wife think, wouldn’t it? The idea made him chuckle.
He didn’t like an outsider infringing on his time. He imagined Iris sitting with him now, her prim and proper glasses perched on her pert little nose, and all traces of mirth left him. She would probably be horrified the kids were running around the pool right now. Aghast that he’d let them load up on soda and candy at the movies. Chewing his ass out for not making them wear face masks when they played catch.
Please. They were kids, for fuck’s sake, and they were his kids, and he’d had a blast doing all of that shit when he was little, and he was still kicking. So what if a fly ball had broken his nose once? He should have caught it.
Of course, Iris’s diatribe only played out in his mind’s eye; he didn’t know if she would be outraged over those things or not. He could just see those crossed arms and her looking down her nose at him, like a teacher about to smack his hand with a ruler.
Frowning, he shifted his weight in his seat, wondering why that image was kind of hot.
That was certainly an attraction he didn’t need, but it did give him an idea.
There was no doubt about it: Iris was cute. She was about to be a piece of meat in a lion’s den, surrounded on all sides by horny-ass rock stars who would fuck anything that could bend over. If he could hook her up with someone, she might be out of his hair for a while. And if she even thought about feeding information to his ex-wife, then Heidi might learn her precious paragon wasn’t so angelic after all.
Two could play at this game.
But in the meantime, Eli just couldn’t wait to hear what his bandmates would say about him bringing Heidi’s nanny on tour. Jesus. Kill me now.
THE WORST THING ABOUT her job, Iris often thought, was not being able to talk about it.
No one could even know who she worked for. Not friends, not family. All a part of a non-disclosure agreement she had signed with Heidi when she was hired. She had no one to vent to, no one to agonize with over the summer ahead of her. Not that anyone would feel sorry for her. Sara, her best friend, would absolutely flip out if she knew Iris was touring with Elijah Vance this summer. She was a rock fan and had actually see
n him in concert before.
How fun would it be to arrange a meet-up between the two of them? But it would never happen.
Iris eyed Sara over their martinis and ached so much to tell her about everything that she almost couldn’t force the words back down her throat. Specifics aside, however, her friend was going to need to know that she would be absent for two months, or Sara would have the police looking for her.
“So . . . I have some news.”
Sara’s hazel eyes—currently surveying the restaurant for eligible men—swung to Iris and widened slightly in enthusiasm. “Yeah? Good?”
“That’s debatable.” Iris took a sip to fortify her courage, though she feared it might dull her wits. This could get tricky.
“Uh-oh. Spill.” Sara leaned forward, all ears.
“It seems my job is taking me away for a couple of months.”
Sara knew she was a nanny for a high-profile person. But that was all. “Oh my God! Did you say months? It’s loud in here.” She put a hand to her ear as if she were hard of hearing.
Iris nodded. “Months.”
“Like a vacation?”
“Not exactly. I just wanted you to know I’ll be gone.”
“You don’t look very happy about it.”
“I’m not, if you must know.”
“Is this something your average person wouldn’t be happy about? Or just something you aren’t happy about?”
Iris had to laugh. Sara knew her too well sometimes. “That’s hard to answer. Who is your average person?”
“Say I’m your average person.”
“You would be happy about it.” God, would you ever. Elijah wouldn’t know what hit him. Even sadder than never being able to introduce Sara to him, though, was the fact that Iris couldn’t warn her friend that one of her favorite singers in the world had a streak of colossal a-hole in him. Oh well. It was something she would have to take to her grave. Sara’s ignorance could be her bliss.
“I really envy you, you know that? And while I’m sitting over here nursing my jealousy, you’re taking all this for granted.”
Iris sat up straighter, her brows drawing together. “I don’t take it for granted. I’m not as . . . affected by it as some people might be. It’s about those kids.”
“Know any other famous people who are hiring?”
“You don’t even like kids.”
“Damn. I forgot.” Sara snapped her fingers. “Well, I can pretend, right? Put on a movie and throw some snacks at them?”
“There is sooo much more to it than that.” Many times, Iris had almost slipped and said Heidi’s name, or one of the boys’ names. She tried to avoid talking about her job at all. And now that she’d relayed the needed information, she wanted to steer the conversation away. Falling into Elijah Vance’s arms earlier today would be the only professional gaffe she would allow herself. He sure smelled good, though. Expensive. Like leather and sin. “Anyway. When I drop off the face of the earth in a couple of weeks, you’ll know why.”
“Wait, I won’t hear from you at all? Isn’t that, I don’t know, weird?”
“It’s not, really. You’ll hear from me, just maybe not as often. I’m not sure what breaks I’ll get, or when.”
“God. I hope they pay you well.”
She had no complaints. Sometimes this job consumed her life but, sadly, she didn’t have much of one to consume. Sara was her favorite date, and as far as her family, she was never inclined to visit them. Like ever.
“There are definite perks. Like you said, I guess the average person would jump at this.”
“I’m rethinking being an average person. The average person probably likes kids,” Sara said.
“It’s kind of a requirement for the survival of our species.”
“Ha! The world is overpopulated. I don’t know, maybe I would like my own kids if I ever have any. But can I just say I respect the hell out of you? It must take a lot to put your life on hold for someone else’s family.”
Iris reflected on that in silence, sipping her drink. She was pretty much on call 24/7. If Heidi had a “thing” come up at this very moment, as often happened, Iris would abandon their meal and run to her side. Rain or shine, weekday or weekend. But in return, she’d gotten to take some fabulous vacations with the family. She had days off when Eli took the boys—while not necessarily rare, she sometimes wished for a little more frequency there. She loved Seger and Dylan, but she needed a break from someone else’s life every now and then. She valued her quiet time.
Something she wouldn’t get much of on a tour. On a bus. With rowdy boys and a surly rock star. Ugh.
Sara was scrutinizing her through narrowed eyes. “I’m dying—actually dying—for details. You’re too good an employee.”
Not really. I did get busted eavesdropping on my boss. But hey, Heidi wanted her to hone her snooping skills, so what better time than the present? “Not really. I sort of got in trouble.” She could divulge that much, at least. She supposed.
“Ooh, do tell.”
Iris shrugged. “I was interested in a conversation about this . . . thing coming up. I was listening through a door. And I got caught.”
Sara laughed. “That’s awesome.”
“It was not awesome. I felt so bad.”
“Oh, come on. Immaculate Iris has to fuck up every now and then, right? It makes the rest of us feel better about ourselves.”
“I really do hate it when you call me that.”
“Then you should work a little harder to make me not call you that. Maybe this was a first step. Give me something else. Let your hair down a little when you go do this thing, whatever it is, and tell me all about it. What you can, anyway.”
“Fat chance of that. My hair will stay up.” What kind of role model would she be for those boys if she partied it up? Not to mention, Elijah would probably love any excuse to get Heidi to let her go. He’d looked at her like something gross he’d found stuck to the bottom of his shoe.
And why shouldn’t he, really? He thought she was a snoop. He wasn’t wrong.
She didn’t understand why it nagged at her so much.
Sara usually made Iris feel better, but not tonight. She left her friend after dinner with anxiety gnawing in the pit of her stomach, making her nearly sick as she drove home. I can’t do this echoed through her head, no matter how she tried to silence that voice. She had even expressed that concern to Heidi before Elijah had found her with her ear to the bedroom door. Now she was even more certain. Heidi had waved off her worries. “You’ll have fun once you get out there,” she’d said airily, then reminded Iris of all the cities she would get to see, all the people she would meet, all the excitement of a live rock show. “I miss it,” Heidi had concluded, showing a rare glimpse of melancholy over her lost marriage.
They were different people, though. Iris wasn’t a social butterfly; she never had been. She wasn’t interested in meeting people. And while some rock was okay, Elijah’s brand was way too heavy for her. Elijah himself was way too heavy for her. She didn’t deal well with people like him. Confrontational people.
She really wished she could change Heidi’s mind about this.
Four
Immaculate Iris, her inner voice grumbled a couple of weeks later as she packed. Heidi had been as dismissive of her halfhearted protests as she had feared. (Halfhearted only because she hadn’t wanted to tell her boss no outright.) Iris had quietly accepted her fate.
Her clothing was the epitome of comfort, maybe, but that was all. She had some flashier ensembles for nights out with Heidi and the kids, but none of those would be appropriate now. While Heidi had advised her not to pack too heavily, she’d said to cover all bases. A dress in case she wanted to take the kids to a nice dinner. A bathing suit in case she wanted to take them to the pool while they were at a hotel, or to the beach on one of their coastal stops. Elijah was all about going out on the water.
“Look at it as an adventure,” Heidi had told her at last. “And hey, may
be you’ll meet someone. I met Eli backstage at a show. But don’t think for a minute you can leave me if you do.” She’d laughed as she said it, wagging a carrot stick, but Iris thought she’d heard real desperation behind the jest.
“You know I don’t plan on going anywhere,” Iris had assured her. “No matter what. But, um . . . about reporting back on what he’s up to? Is that . . ?”
“Really necessary?” Heidi crunched down on her carrot and chewed thoughtfully for a moment. Iris had glanced up at her from where she was putting an afternoon snack together for the boys. “I just need to know he’s really changed. For the better.”
Was that it? Iris had bit her bottom lip before venturing further. “Like how?”
“You can get your hands on anything and everything on tour, Iris. And I know he has before. The road was his mistress, and everything that came with it. I couldn’t compete. I didn’t want to try anymore. I think he’s different now, but I need to know. He wants to spend more time with the boys. I need to feel good about that.”
Iris frowned. “I haven’t been around him much, but looks to me like he’s great with the kids. It doesn’t seem like you have anything to worry about.”
“Yeah. Doesn’t seem that way. But the ultimate test is when he’s touring. If you see anything, let me know. Make your best judgment and stick to it. You are my voice in this.” Those words had filled Iris with a strange dread.
The scene dissolved from her memory, and she angrily tossed her makeup bag into her suitcase. She was Heidi’s eyes, ears, and voice. But the thought of going head to head with Elijah Vance over his own children made her stomach churn. Plus, she didn’t even know what she was supposed to be looking for. Drugs? Did Heidi actually expect her to barge in on Eli in attempts to catch him doing something nefarious? Would he really do those things around his sons?
It was getting real. Iris was flying out with Seger and Dylan in two days for the first show in Portland, Oregon. She had expected Elijah to fight Heidi on that plan, but surprisingly enough, he had relented; the tickets were booked, and they were ready to go. The kids were beside themselves with excitement. But after that flight, it would be a long time before Iris would see her little apartment again.
