by C L Walker
People gathered around the pool and about twenty feet behind them was a wicker couch with white cushions, that was dubbed ‘The Kissing Couch.’ It was set against a big tree with branches that hung low in some areas and afforded a bit of privacy, so I was relieved that it wasn’t in the middle of the crowd like I had assumed it would be.
I watched as couple after couple took their places on the couch and shared kisses, none of them lasted the allowed seven minutes and only a few people used their tongues from what I could see.
It was a lot tamer than I had imagined it would be and it seemed that the crowd had lost interest because of it, there was only a handful of people watching intently while everyone else carried on as they were.
As I was told by Jesse it was an opportunity to allow people to notice other’s they hadn’t previously considered but most of the time it didn’t work out as intended. He said it was a failed experiment that they kept doing just for shits and giggles.
When Sai stepped up, I got worried for a second that he might pull my name because I would flat out refuse to kiss him because it’d be like kissing a brother.
I felt relief sweep over my body when he called the name of a junior who stepped forward with a kind smile on her face. It was too bad he and Ashley hadn’t decided to date yet because couples didn’t have to play and they both looked like they would have preferred the exemption.
As I watched I grew warm and anxious, I felt wild, and I wanted to see the show I had anticipated seeing. The one where people would let loose and act as free as I felt. The night was something else to me, it was the escape of a lifetime and I desperately wanted to see how far I could take it, but it was just another party to everyone else.
Micah must have been next because he emerged from the crowd and sauntered over to the couch as I watched him closely from beneath heavy lids. I considered his person from his feet to the top of his head, and it was the first time I had watched him so unabashedly.
He turned slowly, dropped onto the couch, leaned back, and slouched down like he was about to watch his favorite sitcom. Naturally, he sat there casually as if kissing random people was an everyday occurrence for him, but I hoped that it wasn’t.
As he relaxed, my eyes continued to wander over him of their own accord and I didn’t have the will to stop them. His black cotton joggers were pulled tightly against his thighs, as he had them spread apart, and he was wearing a grey fitted hoodie. His hair was tied back giving me a clear view of the small flower inked on the side of his neck below his ear that was about the size of a fifty-cent piece.
He’s stupid gorgeous.
I wanted to be the one to kiss him and this was the perfect excuse to do so because if I was picked it would look like I didn’t have a choice.
Sai brought him a piece of paper and said, “It’s the last one.”
Wait, the last one? It is me… I’m going to kiss him!
The realization brought on such anxiousness that I wondered how I had thought seconds before that it was a good idea.
Kissing cursed boys can’t be a good idea!
I glanced at Sai just as he looked away from me, I wasn’t sure, but it seemed as if he was trying a little too hard to be casual about what I was about to do. I was freaking out and he was going about his business instead of offering his support which was so unlike him.
I’m going to kiss Micah…
What were the chances? No, there was no chance about it, it was done on purpose and Sai was the culprit. He had to be, he looked guilty!
“Skylar,” Micah said.
Jesse who had become my biggest supporter, started to chant my name and soon everyone else joined in as I stood there and stared at Micah.
“Go,” Sai whispered after he seemed to materialize by my side. “You can’t chicken out now. Just do it. People don’t even watch after you start.”
“I know but I’m nervous,” I said. “Also, something is fishy about me getting Micah.”
His eyes grew round.
“Sai!”
He shrugged his shoulders. “I’m not sorry.”
I took a step forward and then stopped again so he pushed me, but that time I let him propel me forward as “The Hills,” by The Weekend began to play. Everyone quieted themselves in favor of listening to the music and it set the mood like we were playing out a scene in a movie, a scene that was to be a defining moment in my life if I let it.
I stopped in front of Micah and he looked up at me and offered no words, he didn’t sit up, he didn’t make a move, he just waited for me.
Since he refused to meet me halfway that meant I was to go to him, and that gave me a bad idea.
His gaze dropped and he looked my entire body up and down, he was trying to make me squirm and that only made me more determined.
His lap looked inviting so who was I to deny myself in that moment?
Had I been sober, I wouldn’t have been standing before him, had I been sober, I might not have melted from the way he looked at me but clearly, I wasn’t sober.
So, I did the most logical thing I could think of in that moment, which was what my body wanted.
I put my knee on one side of him as he tipped his chin up slightly. He was waiting for the light peck he must have assumed was coming. When I put my other knee on the other side of him and straddled his thighs his eyes widened immediately as he hissed, “Oh, fuck.”
He looked down between our bodies and bit his bottom lip before his eyes shot to mine and I saw pure unfiltered lust in them.
He could see my underwear but judging by his reaction he didn’t mind it, and even though no one had ever seen them before, I didn’t mind it either. In fact, it made me feel like that for the first time I had all the power, he was to be at my mercy for once and that pleased me.
Everyone began to hum with excitement because someone was finally putting on a show, and it seemed that was what they had also been hoping for.
It was scandalous but there was no backing down.
I didn’t want to waste another second, so I put my hands on either side of his shoulders, leaned in, and pressed my lips against his. The light contact had my stomach all in flutters and I suddenly didn’t feel as brave as I had the moment before.
His lips were soft and warm against mine and I could smell the whiskey again that I desperately wanted to taste from his mouth, but I didn't have the guts to go there like I had thought.
I kissed him a few more times and started to pull away thinking I had proved my point well enough. I could be a little daring. Easy peasy.
But our lips only parted long enough for me to see him peer at me with darkened eyes because he grabbed my face softly and pulled it back down to his. Then he kissed me. But it was different than how I had kissed him.
It was a kiss that overflowed with need.
His hands left my face to run through my hair as my own clutched the fabric of his sleeves with desperation.
He licked at my bottom lip and it took me but a moment to figure out what he wanted, and once I did, I opened my mouth. When he slid his tongue inside and against mine slowly, we both moaned with such relief you would think that we had been waiting for that moment our entire lives.
It made me forget everything. Where we were, who I was and why I shouldn’t have been kissing him.
It felt too right to be wrong.
Asshole or not, every kiss, every stroke of his tongue worked up something inside of me that was bright, blinding in its intensity and worth every moment I had spent being angry at him.
I sucked in a breath when his knuckles brushed between my legs, and against my sensitive flesh as he adjusted himself before he grabbed my hips and pulled me forward.
I looked at him in surprise when the new position afforded me the realization of how hard he was beneath me. When he returned my look with a knowing smile, I thanked the stars he decided to wear thin joggers because he felt like heaven between my legs.
I leaned forward once more and resumed kissing
him as if it was the most natural thing for us to do. As if we had lived just to do this very thing. As if we were made for each other…
Everything was still once more; it was just us and the music and I was consumed by the feel of it vibrating through my body, the silkiness of his tongue and the feel of his hands as he pushed me back once more.
There was nothing else.
He found a steady rhythm, he pulled me forward and back again as we continued to kiss each other.
I wanted to taste that euphoric release that everyone talked about, and I knew he could give it to me.
I started moving my hips slowly over him of my own accord as his fingers pressed firmly into my hips and I relished the way he felt beneath me.
“Sky,” he whispered against my mouth. “Don’t forget that a few people might be watching.”
People were watching…
But everyone was drunk, they didn’t care, they had been cheering us on and even if they were watching, I was completely blinded by emotion, so I didn’t have it in me to care.
Lust was a powerful thing.
“Times up,” somebody said, but I wasn’t ready to stop.
I couldn’t remember why their opinions mattered; I couldn’t recall why I shouldn’t take what I wanted, what I so desperately needed.
I was tainted by whiskey, and there was no stopping me.
He pulled his lips away from mine, looked into my eyes and made a frustrated noise before he leaned his head back against the couch and said, “We should probably stop.”
“Micah?” I asked softly in response, and his head sprang back up immediately as he seemed to know what I was asking for.
I closed my eyes and began to move my hips at an even slower pace, I was barely moving them at all, but it felt perfect. I was so close to something. Just a few more…
“Micah,” I whispered that time.
He kissed me slowly with one hand around my waist as the other found its way under my shirt and under my bra on the side that no one would be able to see. He squeezed gently as his mouth moved away from mine and he trailed kisses down my face.
When he reached my neck, he bit me and a little too hard, but it made me shudder as a wave rocked my body. He caught my mouth with his and I cried into it as I rode out my release before my movements began to slow.
“What the fuck?” he asked suddenly as he gripped my hips again but harder.
“What?”
“Don’t stop.” His words rushed out of his mouth as he leaned his head back and watched me as I continued to grind myself against him.
Ten seconds later he bit his bottom lip, closed his eyes, and grabbed my ass hard with both hands as he muttered my name. He came in the middle of a party and all because of me.
I smiled, pleased with seeing him so undone until all at once the noise from the party rushed into my ears and suddenly, even in my drunken state I had the presence of mind to feel shame.
I was too scared to look behind me.
“Don’t worry.” He looked around the area. “No one is paying attention anymore, and there’s literally people fucking in the pool, so this pales in comparison.”
That made me feel better. “Right. Everyone is drunk. This is totally fine.”
I shivered when he slid his hands from my ass across my thighs slowly and back up again. His thumbs applied pressure to the insides of my thighs that made me want more.
But I suddenly felt too uncomfortable.
When I didn’t know what I was supposed to do or say I pushed myself off him and pulled down my skirt quickly. I didn’t want to make things worse by showing the world my goods, it was bad enough that he had seen them.
Once I was up, I looked at him hesitantly and when my eyes immediately went to his crotch area I gasped in shock and covered my mouth when I saw the wet mark across his pants.
I bit my lip to stop myself from having a meltdown as he looked down at the spot then back up to me with a smirk on his face. “I guess you aren’t so boring after all.”
“Screw you.”
He smiled brighter at what was supposed to be an insult. “You will soon enough.”
I rolled my eyes at his suggestion. “In your dreams.”
“It’ll be a reality.”
“What?” I asked. “Why do you sound so sure of this?”
His eyes were dark and intense as he stood suddenly and put one hand on my waist and turned me around. “Someone is looking over here now so unless you want them to see the evidence of what we have done walk in front of me to the house.”
I walked slowly through the crowd as he seemed to be using me as a shield since he was staying so close behind me.
Once we walked into the kitchen, he took off his hoodie and tied it around his waist to cover up the crotch area of his pants. He was wearing a tank top underneath that showed off his arms that were covered in tattoos and I realized then that I had never seen him in a short-sleeved shirt before, so I didn’t know he had so many of them.
No eighteen-year-old had any business having so many tattoos, and they were not new so he either had cool parents or he had a rebellious streak. That or it had something to do with the culture of his tribe.
My eyes trailed down his body, he was tall and thin, but he was thick in all the right places. Thus, my previous rash actions. Because pretty faces, thick thighs, and whiskey were the recipe to my downfall.
I felt overwhelmed by him and what I had done so I felt the need to apologize and make excuses. “I’m sorry. I was just trying to prove a point so I really can’t even begin to explain what just happened.”
“Don’t worry, you aren’t the first or the last to do this,” he said, and he looked around the room and away from me.
I wasn’t the first? Cocky bastard!
He turned back to me and I must have been visibly fuming because one side of his mouth kicked up into a half smile.
How dare he suggest his allure was so strong that I couldn’t resist it like the others! Even though that was in fact exactly what had happened, but it never would have if I wasn’t drunk.
I pushed against his chest because he was standing so close. “I’m a little drunk, you could have been anyone.”
He grabbed my hand and pulled me against him. “That’s not what I meant, I wasn’t saying you aren’t the first or the last to give into me personally, but then again… Nah, that’s a conversation for another day. I meant you aren’t the first or the last to get reckless at a party, it’s fine, I promise.”
“Fine but–”
“But since we are on the subject of you giving into me, you don't sound drunk, not enough to warrant such behavior at least. In fact, I’d say you are nearly sober at this point.” He trailed a finger from my chin down my neck and across my chest then he stopped just shy of the top of my breast. “You wanted it, and now you’re using alcohol as an excuse but it’s too late. Because even now, you may not be sober, but you are fully coherent and your eyes keep lowering to stare at my mouth, and your fists are clenched at your sides as you wait for what I’ll do next, but you do nothing to stop it. Because you still want it.”
He was right, it was as if I were under a spell. He was intoxicating and even though I fought against it I liked the way I felt when he touched me.
“You want more, don’t you, babe? Because it wasn’t enough.” He leaned into my neck and licked it slowly. “We both know it won’t be enough until we’ve had it all…and even then, I have this hunch it still won’t be.”
I made a noise that was half sigh and half moan that sounded foreign in my throat as I had never made a noise like that in my life.
Reckless abandon.
“I knew you liked it,” he murmured, before he bit my skin lightly and trailed his teeth down towards my collarbone and my knees nearly buckled.
My head began to swim, I felt over heated, and my palms were sweating. I recalled what he needed to survive as his teeth dragged across my skin. But I refused to pull away because I knew he w
ould never force anything on me.
“That’s enough,” Sai said, and he pulled Micah away and did what I couldn’t by putting space between us.
Micah shrugged him off but didn’t say a word as he continued to stare at me like he needed something only I could give him.
“You guys both drank too much for you to be doing this right now,” Sai furthered, and followed with an exasperated sigh. “I’m taking her home.”
Sai lectured me the whole way which felt like forever because we had to walk home since we had both drank. He was convinced I shouldn’t drink around Micah again until I figured out my feelings for him and I didn’t bother to tell him that aside from hate the only thing I felt for Micah was lust.
At some point I tuned him out because all I could think about was the truth of Micah’s words and the feel of his hands on my skin.
He’s right, it’s not enough.
Nineteen
Skylar
He walked towards me with streaks of red down his cheeks as his hair billowed out around his head. The moon was too large as it hung in the sky behind him and cast a blueish glow upon the empty field.
I was on my knees before him, pleading, but still he reached a hand into my chest and pulled out my heart. I felt nothing as I watched it beat within his grasp, not even wondering why I wasn’t dead.
His eyes shot to mine as he whispered, “You’re mine now.”
I woke up with a gasp with both hands pressed firmly against my chest as I struggled to catch my breath. My body was cold, but I was covered in sweat and I was shaking with fear as I glanced down with worry that I might see a hole in my chest where my heart should have been.
Once my ability to rationalize returned and my dream state dissipated, I became more aware of my surroundings and my fear subsided.
My eyes flicked to my alarm, I had twenty minutes to get to school because it either never went off or I had turned it off without recalling.
I flew out of bed, tied my hair into a messy bun at the top of my head, threw on a pair of jeans and a sweater and shuffled out of my room.
As I passed the kitchen I tripped and went flying forward before I fell. When my chin hit the floor, tears started to fill my eyes immediately.
