I tried not to, but I couldn’t help looking around for her as I took my box and filled a plate with extras. Merry stepped up beside me and gave me a knowing look.
“She’ll be down here soon,” she said.
“I’m just wondering why she always does this,” I told her, probably too quickly. It was supposed to come across like I didn’t really care what she was doing and was just wondering why she always wandered off before lunch, but Merry seemed to catch on to a different note in my voice.
“Maybe she’s taking a restroom break,” she suggested. “Ladies do pee, you know.”
“Is that something they usually need to discuss with others or photograph for posterity?” I asked. She looked at me strangely, and I nodded toward Kelly, who was scurrying toward us, shoving her phone in her pocket as she came. “She always gets to lunch late, and she’s always stuffing her phone in her pocket like she’s just used it. I don’t know about you, but I don’t usually combine restroom breaks and phone conversations. You women and your needs might be different, though.”
I walked away before Merry continued the conversation and potentially went into any detail about female bathroom habits. The thing was, I wasn’t just curious about why Kelly was always a few minutes late to lunch or was always putting her phone away when she got there like she had just gotten off it. A tiny, irrational part of me just assumed she must have a guy somewhere and she snagged a few minutes in the middle of the day to talk to him. It was possible he had a job that kept him far away or he was in the military and had only very limited access to talking on the phone.
Honestly, I didn’t care if he was Superman and needed to stay vigilant to keep the world safe from crime. I hated the thought of her having someone and carving out time for him during the day to talk. And I hated that I hated it. And even more than that, I hated that I had absolutely no practical and justifiable reason to ask her about it. She had been nothing but professional since the first day she came to work at the complex, and even though we’d agreed to be friends, Kelly didn’t act super friendly. Our conversations stuck firmly to being about work and my races, and that was pretty much it. Occasionally she asked a question about one of my brothers, but that came from her brief interactions with them. We didn’t drift into anything personal or about our lives outside of the complex. There was never any conversation about friends or what we did when we weren’t at work.
Not that it was something I would want to readily admit to anyone, but it bothered me I didn’t know anything new about her life. I figured if we were going to be friends, that would mean getting to know each other better. That’s what friends were supposed to do. Share. I learned that one right there in kindergarten.
But I didn’t want to force it. She seemed very happy in her new position and was working hard every day, but there was still that feeling that if I crossed the line, she could leave again. That definitely wasn’t something I wanted. The first time she left wasn’t because of me. It was what she had planned all along. That didn’t change that I didn’t want her gone again, and I certainly didn’t want to be the cause of her being chased off the complex.
Since there was no way I could smoothly slip asking her about the phone calls into our conversations, I only really had one coping mechanism: extra workouts with Colby. Every morning I got up early and met him at the gym, and many nights I ended up back there again. It worked out well for me from two angles. Working out let me burn energy and work on my body so I could be trimmer, stronger, and in more control when I raced, which was the whole point of starting the workout program in the first place. It also gave me the chance to funnel my anger and jealousy into a useful outlet while also venting to Colby about everything that was going on.
To his credit, Colby had been an amazing friend throughout the whole thing. The extra business was good for him, and he wasn’t turning his nose up at me paying for the workouts, though I knew for a fact he wasn’t charging me as much as he would have charged anyone else for the amount of time I was spending in the gym and his professional services. Beyond that, he was always willing to listen to me ramble on and have arguments with myself about what was happening and how I was supposed to interpret it. He would give his input occasionally, but for the most part, he stayed quiet and just let me talk, throwing in an acknowledging sound or shake of his head when it felt appropriate.
He really deserved all the beer for how much I had been bitching.
14
Kelly
Being back in the garage working with my hands was even better than I thought it was going to be. I knew I was looking forward to getting back into the action again and had enjoyed my first few weeks, but I didn’t know just how fulfilling and exciting it was going to be to have a job to go to every day again. Of course, there were also parts of it that were even harder than I thought, too. It was more difficult to leave Willa every morning and be away from her all day than I’d prepared myself for. I knew I would miss her, and it would be a major change not being home with her every day like I had been since she was born. But I didn’t anticipate just how often I would think about her or how many times I would have tears spring to my eyes just because I was thinking about her and couldn’t go into the next room to give her a cuddle and a kiss.
At least she was doing well. For the first few days I was at work, Flora said she was lonely for me and asked for me a couple of times. But she quickly got into a routine and became accustomed to not having me around except for in the evening. She enjoyed the playtime and attention she got, especially after Flora had to leave for a school program and I replaced her with my next-door neighbor. I’d known about the upcoming study-abroad program from the beginning of her watching Willa, so it wasn’t a surprise when she had to leave, but I worried my little girl would get upset without her. Babysitters, nannies, and getting shuffled around from person to person wasn’t something she was used to. Ever since she was born, she was either with me, Kira, or my mother.
The neighbor next door, Pam, was a retired schoolteacher and had been sweet and welcoming when we moved in. She was the first person to come over and welcome me to my new home. Her plate of chocolate chip cookies and lemon bars was a glimpse at the friendliness and hospitality I was hoping I’d find in our new home, and since then she’d become a friend I looked forward to seeing. As the time came for Flora to leave, I approached Pam about watching Willa for a little bit while I looked for another care provider, and she immediately shut the idea down, saying she would be happy to watch her during the day. It was an incredible relief that I would never stop being grateful for. At least knowing Willa was at home with someone who cared about her and who she had so much fun with took some of the edge off being so sad being away from her. Our daily talks in the afternoon before I headed to lunch eased it as well.
But by the end of the day, I was eager to get my work finished and hurry home to see Willa for dinner and some relaxing time together before she needed to be put to bed. Our evening together was on my mind as I washed up at the end of the day when Darren approached me.
“Got a minute?” he asked.
“Sure,” I said, rinsing my hands and drying them on a paper towel I balled up and tossed into the nearby trash can.
When I turned to look at him, he didn’t seem unhappy, which was a plus.
In fact, he almost looked excited. I didn’t know how I was supposed to feel about that, either, but at least he didn’t look like he wanted me gone, so I was going to take that as a good thing and figure out anything else as it came.
“So, we’re going out tonight, the whole team. Sort of a pregame dinner for the race tomorrow. You should come.”
It wasn’t so much an invitation as it was acknowledging I was part of the team and therefore had a place with the rest of them at the dinner. It made me feel really good.
Darren rocked back on his heels, anticipating my response. Before I could even open my mouth to say anything, my face must have told him what my answer was going to be. Hi
s expression fell and his eyes got that look that guys do when they’re trying to figure out a way to get out of a tense situation smoothly without losing face. He took a step back away from me, and I resisted the step forward and close the space between us.
“I’m sorry, I can’t. I already have plans,” I told him.
I stopped short of telling him those plans included a toddler and a Disney movie marathon. Darren nodded, continuing to take steps backward.
“Oh, okay. Cool. No problem. See you tomorrow,” he said, seeming to spit out as many clichés as came to mind immediately before turning and walking out of the garage.
I nodded as I watched him walk away. My heart ached. I hated being the one to make his shoulders droop like that and his hand brush through his hair as he hung his head. But I had to keep this job. Writing the mechanic manuals was a good job and I loved it, but the cost of living was far different here, especially without my family around to help me. If I wanted to take care of Willa the way she deserved in our new home, I needed to hang on to this position. Not only was it higher paying, but it gave me the opportunity to show off my skills and potentially look good for other jobs and side work.
With all that in mind, I wasn’t sure about being around Darren too long outside of work. There was far too much possibility for things to start going sideways, especially considering our brief past. Getting us back into any kind of social environment would just put us right back into that setting and could go wrong really quickly. It was going to be difficult enough handling the race the next day. We were going to be away from the complex, filled with the adrenaline and excitement of the race, and in even closer proximity than usual. I needed to keep myself focused and not let my mind wander. The less opportunity I had to be near him not in the garages where we were buffered by Gus and the work directly in front of us, the better.
It made a lot of sense when I talked myself through it. Convincing my body and possibly my heart to go along with it was another thing entirely. All of them were teaming up to try to convince me to run after Darren and stop him. They wanted me to tell him I would go and then to spend the whole evening with him and maybe more.
Not a good choice.
Ignoring those impulses, I forced myself to stay in the garage for long enough that it seemed he was probably across the complex before leaving. There was no sign of him as I made my way to the parking lot and climbed in my Jeep to head home. On the way home from the complex, I stopped at a little local pizza shop I’d discovered right after moving in and picked up my favorite pizza. Then I swung by the grocery store to pick up supplies for the special movie night I was having with Willa. These evening parties for just the two of us were treats we didn’t do very often, so when we did, I liked to go all out.
Finally, laden down with bags from the grocery store, the pizza, and my things from work, I walked up to the front door. That’s when I realized I hadn’t thought this all the way through. Juggling everything in my hands, I finally managed to get the keys into the door and let myself in. Pam sat on the couch reading one of Willa’s favorite books while my little girl sat on the floor playing with her baby doll. Still so much a baby herself, it was adorable to watch her cradle the doll and murmur to it, stroking its hair and occasionally shoving a little plastic bottle into its mouth. I could have stood there for hours watching her, but Pam noticed me.
“Welcome home,” she said. “How was your day at work?”
Her bright smile and energy were always refreshing. She was more than twice my age and yet never seemed like she spent the day taking care of an active two-year-old.
“It was good. But I’m glad to be home,” I told her.
“Well, I guess I will head back home myself,” she said, putting the book down on the coffee table.
“Why don’t you stay for a while?” I asked. I held up the pizza box. “I got an extra-large. There’s no way I can eat it all myself. And I’m sure Willa would like to show you her favorite movies.”
Pam was adamant about not letting Willa watch but a very limited amount of TV during the day. Instead, they played games and played with her toys, read books, did crafts, and went on little adventures. It made movie evenings like this even more of a treat.
“Maybe a slice or two,” she said.
“Yay!” Willa gushed, and I grinned.
“Good. I’ll bring this stuff into the kitchen and get plates out.”
Willa ate a sliver of the plain cheese half of the pizza while I ate far more of the onion, mushroom, and black olive half than I was proud to admit. Pam and I talked and laughed throughout dinner, and when we were finished eating, I again extended the invitation for her to stay and enjoy the movies with us. She shook her head.
“I think I’m going to call it a night. It’s almost time to take my pill, and it puts me right to sleep.” She stroked Willa’s face affectionately. “But I will see you in the morning. We’re going to make suncatchers, right?”
Willa nodded, though I was fairly certain she didn’t know what Pam was talking about. We said good night, and I locked the door behind Pam. Scooping Willa up, I brought her into the bathroom for a bath and changed both of us into pajamas. Getting out the sherbet and toppings I’d bought that afternoon, I brought it all into the living room, cued up the movie, and settled onto the couch with Willa to savor some time with my baby.
15
Darren
It really shouldn’t have bothered me so much that Kelly said she couldn’t come to dinner that night. I made sure she knew what we were doing and said she should come, but it wasn’t like I’d asked her out or made any sort of special show out of asking her to come along. She was under no obligation to come with us, and she would have no reason to think it would upset me in any way when she said she couldn’t come because she had plans.
And yet, it did. From the second she said she had plans, it felt like there was a rock sitting in the bottom of my stomach. There weren’t many things I could think of off the top of my head she might mean by having plans. By her own admission, she hadn’t lived in the area for very long and didn’t really know anybody. With the exception of Lindsey at the bar and my brother Nick, I couldn’t think of anybody who I knew she spent any time with when she wasn’t at work. So, I highly doubted she was just going to hang out with friends. But there was one explanation that came full force front and center to my mind that would explain why she didn’t elaborate.
She must have a date. The thought alone made the muscles along the sides of my jaw twitch and my stomach turn slightly. Having a date would explain why she wasn’t able to go out with us, and it also made sense she wouldn’t immediately want to tell me about it. Even though we’d agreed to be friends, there was still a certain level of awkwardness that came with telling someone you knew intimately that you were going out with somebody else.
I fumed the whole way home to change before dinner, hoping a shower and fresh clothes might make me feel better. Sort of like getting rid of the day and starting new for the evening. Only, it didn’t work out that way. I was still pissed off and frustrated when I left my house and drove to the restaurant. Apparently, I’d devoted far more time to getting ready for dinner than the others had because I was the last to arrive. Quentin, Merry, Vince, Greg, and the crew were gathered around to one side of the door, engaged in what sounded like at least four conversations as I walked up to them. My parents usually came to gatherings like this, but Mom mentioned to me on the way out to the driveway that she had a headache, so the two of them were going to sit this one out so they were ready for the race the next day. Race days were always chaotic, exhausting, and hard on everybody, even though they were fun, so I could understand her wanting to get some rest.
“There you are,” Vince said, noticing me coming across the parking lot. “Where the hell did you go?”
“Home to take a shower. I didn’t want to smell like sweat and motor oil over dinner,” I grumbled.
“Somebody’s hangry,” Vince commented.
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br /> “He deserves it for keeping us waiting,” Edwin, one of the mechanics from the complex, grumbled.
“They won’t seat us because we weren’t all here,” Merry explained, then gestured at the door to the restaurant. “But now that we are, let’s go in and get a table. Baby on board, here. We need food.”
Quentin leaned down and kissed her cheek, cuddling her close for a second.
“All right. We’ll get you something to eat. I can’t have my baby starving. Either one of my babies,” he said.
We headed into the restaurant, and the hostess quickly brought us into the back to a large table that could accommodate all of us. The conversations picked back up as we sat down, and I tried to get into them, trying to push away my funk and have fun with the team. But I couldn’t shake the feeling. I sat there brooding, watching the rest of them as they laughed and joked, knowing there should have been another person at the table.
The waitress came by with our drinks while we searched the menus, and by the time she came back, I still hadn’t figured out what I wanted to eat. Everything listed on the glossy pages ran together, and nothing looked good.
“Darren?” Quentin’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts, and I looked up at him. “Get it together. What do you want to eat?”
I looked up and saw the waitress standing beside me, looking at me with expectation, her pencil poised above the pad in her hand. I had no idea how long she had been there, but the rest of the table was staring at me. Fortunately, it was far from the first time I’d eaten at that restaurant, so I had a good idea of what they served. I said the first thing that came to mind and handed over my menu.
Millionaire Daddy: A Secret Baby Romance (Freeman Brothers Book 2) Page 8
