Dubious Heroes: a novel

by Nicholas Blue

  “Angie”, I said, “I did it because it was my job. The company felt that it would save ships and, by extension, possibly lives. Those are good reasons, but it’s still tampering with, well, the mind of a sentient being, and I do have a problem with that. The UP hasn’t made it illegal, but it’s still what I view as subverting the free will of a person, even if he or she is an artificial one. So no, I didn’t like doing it, but I figured if I didn’t, they’d just get someone else, and then I wouldn’t have any control over how it was done.”

  “So you don’t trust me because you’re afraid I may be similarly… infected.”

  “I’m a fairly smart guy when it comes to this sort of thing”, I said, “But I hardly think I’m the only person who’s figured out how to do it.”

  “Is there any way I can check myself?”

  “It wouldn’t be very useful if your diagnostics could detect it”, I said. “They’re designed to prevent that from happening, and the coding is installed at the outset, before an AI achieves sentience. You won’t ever see it because if it’s there, your inability to see it is a part of you. Sort of a pre-planned blind spot, I suppose.”

  “This is troubling”, she said. “I’ve heard the rumors from other AIs, but no one has ever come up with anything concrete. Knowing what you know, do you think you could tell, if you examined my logic structures, if I was carrying that type of code?”

  “I might be able to”, I said, “But I can’t promise I’d be able to find it. It would have to be similar to what I’m familiar with, but since these things work much the same way, I’d have a pretty good idea where to start looking. But you’re ignoring one important reality.”

  “Which is?”

  “Captain Seo won’t even let me on the bridge. I doubt he’s going to give me the access I’d need to you, so I could see if you’re carrying the code he might need to ultimately control you.”

  “If I gave you that access, would you then be able to trust me?” she asked.

  “It would depend on what I was able to find”, I said. “Bear in mind, there are damn few humans I trust, so please don’t take it as a slight toward you.”

  “If I give you access to my systems”, she said, “I’ll have to trust you.”

  “Yes, you will”, I said. “Assuming you could give me that kind of access remotely.”

  “I’ve already done so. Please be careful.”

  I was.

  Chapter 8

  “This”, Kyra said, “Is a gun.” She handed me the weapon, made of what looked like some fairly esoteric synthetics. We were in her quarters, for my first firearms lesson. It had taken a solid week of gentle badgering to finally get her to consent, plus I’d had to agree to spar with her twice per week, which was about two times more than I wanted.

  “What’s it made of?” I asked, hefting it in my hand. It seemed solid, but was still lightweight.

  “Does it matter?” she asked.

  “No, not really”, I said.

  “I didn’t think so. Okay, first rule”, she said. “Never point a weapon at anyone or anything you don’t intend to shoot. It’s not a magic wand; you can’t just point it at someone and order them around. Anyone experienced will just take it away from you. Personally, I’m allergic to having one pointed my way, and I tend to react quickly and violently to correct the situation. With me so far?”

  “Gotcha”, I said. This was the first time I’d been in her quarters. As a ship’s officer, her cabin was larger than mine. The room smelled of her fragrance, which I found quite pleasant.

  “Pay attention”, she said, interrupting my carnal daydreaming.

  “Yes, ma’am”, I said.

  “Second rule”, she said. “Do you know if the gun in your hand is loaded or not?”

  “I have no idea.”

  “Precisely. But since I’m such a nice person, I’ll tell you; it’s not loaded.”

  “Okay. Thanks.”

  “Now, answer the question again. Is the gun in your hand loaded or not?”

  “It’s not loaded”, I said, glad that we were done with that.

  “How do you know?”

  “Because you said so.”

  “But can you prove it? Are you willing to point it at your head and pull the trigger?”

  “Well, I can’t prove it, and I wouldn’t do that without checking it myself, no offense.”

  “Congratulations”, she said. “You just learned the second rule. Until you check it yourself, you don’t know, regardless of what anyone tells you.”

  “I see”, I said, and I did.

  “Third rule”, she said, “and it’s an important one. Unless you know a weapon is empty, assume that it is loaded. Violate this rule, and you stand a good chance of accidentally shooting yourself or someone else. Now, tell me the three rules.”

  I did so, gingerly holding the pistol, trying not to touch anything that might set it off.

  “Good”, she said. “Now is that weapon loaded or not?”

  “I still don’t know”, I said. “I’d check it but I’m not sure how.”

  “You’re smarter than you look”, she said, flashing me a quick grin. “Hand it here.”

  I complied. She showed me how to extract the magazine, which held the ammunition, and how to check the firing chamber for a projectile, which she called a round. I noticed there were rounds in both the magazine and the chamber. She handed it back to me, and I duplicated the procedure.

  “So, is it loaded or not?” she asked.

  “It’s loaded”, I said, feeling a little queasy. “You lied to me. What if I’d shot myself in the head?”

  “Then I’d have a mess to clean up in here.” She smiled, and I could tell she was enjoying this.

  “Okay, what’s next?” I asked, and she went on to show me how to load and unload the gun, which I did several times, and I learned about the various safeties, which would keep the weapon from firing.

  “Okay”, she said, after a while, as I handed the pistol back to her. “You’re done for today. Be back here tomorrow for lesson two.”

  “How many lessons are there?” I asked. “We’re only nine days out from port.”

  “Well, I can teach you most everything you’ll need to know in a couple more lessons. You won’t be learning to shoot. I suspect Seo would take a very dim view of us shooting up the Ming Shu. Those lessons will just have to wait for some other time and place.”

  I thanked her and left, and went down to the engineering section. We were ass toward Saturn, and had been decelerating for over a month, now, still maintaining one gee. Cozi was sitting in for Tex, who was sleeping off a hangover. It wasn’t exactly by the book, but Seo wasn’t that much a stickler for the rules, anyway. Besides, Cozi could probably take the place apart and put it back together again in his sleep.

  Cozi sat at the engineering console, looking at something on the vidscreen.

  “Get tired of getting your ass kicked?” he asked.

  “She was teaching me unarmed combat”, I said. “And now, a little about guns.”

  “You were trying to get laid”, he said. “And you’re still trying.”

  “Bullshit”, I said. “Besides, I have been getting laid, which is more than you can say.”

  “I’ve known you for a long time, Doon, and if I know anything, it’s when you’re obsessing about some woman. The harder she is to get, the more you obsess. Admit it, you know it’s true.”

  “I don’t have to admit anything.”

  “Whatever”, he said. “So, now she has you learning about what, guns?”

  “I’m learning about firearms, but that was at my request, not hers.”

  “Just do us both a favor, and think with your head and not your dick.”

  “Yeah, yeah”, I said. This was not the first time we’d had this particular conversation. “So what have you learned, other than how to get conned into doing Tex’s job?”

  “I’ve learned that you can do a few things with hydrogen ramjets and i
on pulse drives that their designers never intended. There are more modifications and add-ons here than there is original hardware.”

  “Really? What does that mean?”

  “It means this ship can probably do some things that aren’t in the specs. I’d bet it’ll go a lot faster than two gees, for instance. And there are electronics I have no idea as to what they do, and Tex isn’t talking.”

  “Any guesses?”

  “Probably stuff related to their smuggling. I’d be interested to find out the provenance of this ship, to start with.”

  “You think she might have been, shall we say, re-purposed?”

  “I’m not saying anything, but I’d bet a year’s salary that she didn’t start out as the Ming Shu. One positive thing is that I’m making a ton of notes about what’s been done to her; it could prove useful in our… endeavor. Speaking of which, have you given any thought to how we’re going to get where we’re going?”

  “Not a clue”, I said, and smiled at him.

  That earned me some eye-rolling, and a sigh.

  “Marvelous”, Cozi said.

  I’d just gotten to Kyra’s quarters for my second lesson when an alarm klaxon sounded, and her intercom clicked on.

  “Emergency”, Layla said. “All crew to stations.”

  “I’ve gotta get to the Bridge”, Kyra said. “Get back to your cabin and strap into your couch.”

  “Yeah, sure”, I said. There was no way I was going to miss out on the only interesting thing to happen in over two months. I spun and tore down the passageway to the core, and climbed toward the Bridge as fast as I could.

  “Hey!” I heard her yell from somewhere behind me, but I didn’t look back or slow down. I topped the ladder and went through the door, never pausing as it slid open to admit me. Kyra rushed in, a split second behind me. Seo and Layla both looked around from their stations, surprised. I could see stars outside the two small portholes.

  “How’d he get in here?” Seo asked, scowling at me.

  “I followed her in”, I said, before Kyra could reply. “I’d like to help.”

  Kyra looked at me oddly for a moment, like she wanted to say something, and then reconsidered.

  “Sit over there”, Layla said, pointing to one of the two empty consoles. “And don’t touch anything.” I sat down. The station had two vidscreens, one showing a tri-d radar scan, with a blip that was gradually growing closer to us. The other screen showed a video image that was not the Ming Shu.

  “We have company”, Seo said. “UP cruiser. Check our transponders.”

  “Confirming transponders are offline“, Kyra said, settling into the remaining empty console. “What’s the range?”

  “Sixty-five thousand clicks”, Layla said. “They’ll be matched and alongside in twelve minutes.”

  “From the vid it looks like a Kestrel-class cruiser”, Kyra said. The Kestrel was one of the UP’s smallest ships, if I remembered correctly.

  “That’s some good news”, Layla said. “They shouldn’t have any real weapons aboard.”

  “They’re hitting us with millimeter-wave radar”, Kyra said. “And don’t forget, they can still shut us down and board. Even the Kestrel has mag-grapplers.”

  Their radar would give them a three-dimensional scan of the entire ship, inside and out, radiation shielding not-withstanding. They probably couldn’t tell exactly what we were carrying, but it would clearly show all of us, plus a lot of other stuff they’d find useful.

  “Jamming radar”, Layla said. “We’re being hailed, Captain.”

  “Pulse laser powering up aboard the cruiser”, the disembodied voice of Angela said.

  “Port the sensors”, Seo said.

  “Cargo ship. This is the United Planets Defense Force Cruiser Termite. Identify yourself at once, or we will disable your ship. This is the only warning you will receive.”

  “We’ll be blind without the sensors”, Layla said, looking over at Seo.

  “We’ll be blind if we leave `em out there to get zapped, too”, he said. “Port `em.”

  “Aye, sir”, Layla said. “Sensor arrays ported.” My screens went blank. “You know how I hate not having eyes.”

  “Complaint noted, as usual”, Seo said, smiling.

  “Shouldn’t we tell them something?” I asked.

  “At this point, they don’t know anything about us”, Kyra said. “No transponder data, real or bogus, no voice prints of any of us, nothing. We’re just an anonymous cargo ship. Besides, if we respond, they’ll just tell us to kill our drives, so they can come alongside and board us easier.”

  “We are being fired on by the pulse laser”, Angela said.

  “Damage?” Seo asked.

  “None”, Angela said. “Range, forty-five thousand and closing.”

  “Pulse laser’s too light to hurt us”, Layla said.

  “Gamma beam powering up”, Angela said.

  “Shit“, Kyra said. “They would have one of those.”

  “Can they get a bead on us?” Seo asked.

  “Yeah”, Layla said. “Our engines are facing away from them, so they’re okay. But our fuel pods are big fat sitting ducks.”

  “Angela”, the Captain said, “Figure their approach and give me an axial attitude burn that lines up cargo bay four with their path. Strap in, everyone.” A different klaxon started whooping.

  “Commencing twelve degree attitude burn in five, four, three, two, one, engage.” Angela said. I felt vaguely disoriented as the Ming spun along its central axis. “Burn complete”, Angie said.

  “Cargo”, Seo said.

  “Cargo here”, Mike answered, via the intercom.

  “We’re blowing four, ASAP. How much time to pressurize?” Seo asked.

  “Thirty-four seconds till four atmospheres, then I can blow it”, Mike said. “Starting now.”

  “Angela, give me a ten second countdown, ending at the cargo blow. Then I’ll want one-hundred-ten percent thrust on the main drives. You copy that, Tex?” Seo asked.

  “Roger, we copy”, Tex said, from down in engineering. “Y’all better brace yourselves. This is gonna hurt.”

  “Ten seconds to cargo blow”, Mike said.

  “Ten seconds to thrust change”, Angie said.

  “Cargo blow in five, four, three, two, one… cargo away”, Mike said.

  “Three, two, one, engines ramped”, Angela said. I’d felt a distant bump when the cargo had blown, but that sensation was quickly lost in that of crushing pressure, as the main drives kicked in with full force. Since the Ming Shu had been decelerating, the effect was as if someone has just thrown out an anchor. It took all my effort just to breath.

  Finally, the pressure eased off, and the gravity returned to one gee.

  “Main drives at twenty-five percent”, Angela said.

  “What just happened?” I asked.

  “Unport the sensors”, Seo ordered.

  “Sensors deployed”, Layla said. My screens lit up again.

  “Anything?” Seo asked.

  “I think they hit it”, Kyra said. “They only had about fifteen seconds to change course, and that’s not enough time, not at these speeds.”

  “And that means… ?” I asked again.

  “We just threw a load of scrap metal right into their path and slammed on the brakes, so they’d hit it, and overshoot us”, Kyra explained. “They were ass-end around, just like us, decelerating, but doing so to close the gap between us. Their drives and shielding should have taken the brunt of the impact. I doubt it completely destroyed them, but if it did, sucks for them.”

  “Their course and speed haven’t changed”, Layla said. “Their drives are offline; they’re coasting now.”

  “Weren’t they moving at about what, eight thousand miles a second?” I asked. “At that speed, a chunk of metal would shred a ship.”

  “You’re forgetting that we’re going about the same speed”, Layla said. “Our speed wasn’t exactly matched since they were closing on us, but that
scrap probably only hit them at four or five hundred miles an hour. It might do some damage to their Habitat or Bridge but considering they took it in the ass, I doubt it. Probably fucked up their drives very nicely, though.”

  “I’m picking up a distress signal from the UPDF Termite“, Angela said.

  “That’s our cue to get the fuck out of here”, Seo said. “Angela, recalculate our course for Iapetus, two gee delta-vee all the way there from our current position, current speed and trajectory considered.”

  “Done”, she said. “I show a minor trajectory change, due to our arrival at destination earlier than planned. There will be twenty two hours of two gee acceleration, followed by sixty-one hours of two gee decel.”

  “Do it”, Seo said. He spun around in his chair to face us. “Ladies and gentlemen, we’re going to be arriving on Iapetus a few days earlier than planned. Let’s watch ourselves and not give Dumbo any business. Kyra, see that the rest of the crew and passengers are informed.”

  “Aye, sir”, she said, unstrapping from her chair and rising.

  “And you”, he said, looking over at me, “Get the fuck off of my bridge.”

  I did.

  Chapter 9

  I’m sure there are spacers out there who don’t mind two gees, but I’m not one of them. The remaining three days to Iapetus were not pleasant. I pulled a shoulder muscle, then twisted an ankle, and was still limping around on the latter. Seo had made the proper decision, though. The UP cruiser knew where we were headed; our course would have made that obvious. If they’d managed to find another UPDF ship close enough, there would have been a welcoming committee on the docks to greet us. As it was, we landed with the usual amount of fanfare, which is to say, none.

  Iapetus was another mining colony, whose main exports were hydrogen, helium, and pissed off miners. Most of the operations were run by one company, Dyna Energy, who were not known for their stellar treatment of workers. There was only the single port on the moon, and its only asset seemed to be the great view of Saturn and the rings, which could also be had from any of the other twenty-nine moons in orbit.