I think Ebbel wants to torture me. or kill me. I don’t actually care which. Join us for waking up the recruits, he said. The fun he said. That moron knew I was hungover, damn him. My headaches with every shout and slams as the cadets hurry to put on their SBUs. I slept in mine and I have no shame, clearly, or I would not be here hungover and miserable standing in the middle of a room full of teenagers. I’m trailing behind Harris, who may be an idiot, but has a really loud voice. I trail farther behind him as he goes down the rows shouting. I whisper ‘just get dressed, please’ and ‘good morning lovely day to be in the Space Forces’ and other equally sarcastic things to the cadets, some of whom grin, some of whom are too afraid to grin.
I run a hand over my freshly shaven hair. I’m so used to tying it up in a bun my morning ritual seems awfully short now. I look around at the other girls. They too seem to feel out of place, and it’s much harder to pick my friends out, now that all of us are dressed in our SBUs and our hair is identical. I catch sight of Wendy, a girl I knew in the Academy. She used to have curly hair, she’d let me tug the curls sometimes, and we’d laugh, but even with it shaved off, I still can’t take my eyes off of her. she has a thin, willowy body, which curves just enough, I can just see it past the bulky SBUs, and her neck is long and slender, and her hands as thin and smooth as the rest of her body, she’s always seemed like a tree to me, thin and smooth and strong, withstanding any wind yet gentle enough to give you shelter.
I try to smile at her but she doesn’t see me.
“Who are you smiling at, Liesel Stowe?”
“Titus, don’t scare me like that,” I say, jumping a little, as he sits down on the bunk next to me to lace up his boots, “What are you doing over here?”
“Oh, it’s harder to strangle Logan with this from over here so I thought it was best,” he says, holding up the tube for his oxygen tank, which he already has on his back. Poor Logan is struggling. “I tried to help him, but now it’s just getting hazardous to his health. Anyway, who are you smiling at? The lovely Wendy Ripley?”
“Yes,” I admit, glaring a little at him on principle, “How do you know?”
“I’ve seen the way you look at her,” he says, half-smiling a little.
“Why? Is it the same way you look at Nicole Tom?” I ask, slyly.
“Touché,” he says, nodding his head appreciatively, “Our crushes aren’t so secret, then?”
“Apparently not, do you think they know?” I ask, a bit worriedly.
“I should think so if both of us do,” he says, shrugging.
“It would make things simpler,” I say, with a sigh, “I don’t even know if she’s gay, though.”
“I don’t know if Tom is straight, but that’s not going to stop me from making a pass at her when I get the chance,” he says, self righteously, making me almost laugh. “You should tell her how you feel, possibly more subtly than I plan to.”
“I’ll leave her a note or something,” I smile.
“That might not be the best idea,” he says.
“Why not?” I ask.
There are idiots like me around who think that it would be disastrously funny to mix up love notes. “Don’t know, just being forward is my approach---but then as I said I plan on making a pass as soon as is convenient and will probably get slapped, so you know, maybe you shouldn’t listen to me.”
“I don’t know,” Liesel says, shrugging a little, as she starts on her second boot.
“What do you think of her?” I ask, nodding at a girl two bunks down form us. she’s got red hair and has noticeably the best figure of all the girls here, and that’s really saying something about her figure because our clothing is far from flattering but she’s still rather eye-catching.
“Darla? She’s got a thing for Tyrell, has since the last term,” Liesel says, “She’s a looker, though.”
“Who’s Tyrell?” I ask.
“The other flight leader, it’s you me, a kid from University I don’t know his name, he’s flight leader of Deneb, and Tyrell Nolan, he’s flight leader of Coruscant,” Liesel explains, “he’s a bit of a trouble maker, but then again, so’s she. She’s decidedly straight though, thankfully I didn’t find that out the hard way.”
“Interesting,” I say, looking at Darla and Tyrell, as Liesel nods at them. I like trouble makers. I ought to, I am one. But I’ve arranged to meet our other flight leaders properly later, at least I hope so. that was my intention we shall see if it works. “Anyway, I think you should tell her how you feel.”
“I will, soon,” she says, shrugging.
“Despite the kakistocracy, let’s try to have some fun while we’re hear and at least make out, eh?” I ask, smiling conspiratorially.
“You’re on,” she says, fist bumping me.
Oh dear god, he is smiling conspiratorially at her now. I knew that Card was no good. how do I keep him away from my precious little girl though---okay, calm down, calm down, for one thing, they are only laughing and talking that could mean nothing they are both flight leaders they could be talking about anything. for another, she’s how old is she? I’m thirty-three so she’s, yes she’s definitely sixteen. Sixteen is old enough to talk to a boy if she wants to. if he treats her well. he’d better treat her well. I’ll smash his head in if he doesn’t. simple. How will I know if he’s not treating her well? She’ll cry or look upset. Surely I’m observant enough to tell. and if she looks upset at all I’ll just disembowel him just to be on the safe side.
I’m really trying to pretend I don’t exist and am most definitely not here. not here not in uniform not hungover. I’m far away, in space, looking at the Nebula and listening to music and I am so not here. They don’t really need me to do anything anyway, I’ll just pretend I’m not really here and the massive headache I have doesn’t exist.
Or a cadet will be strangling himself in front of my eyes and I’ll have to save him, that too.
“Stop.. didn’t anyone tell you how to put these on?” I don’t say it in the ‘you’re an idiot’ sort of way I usually shout things but this time I actually want to know, the kid has it fouled up so bad. “Seriously, brother, we use these in civilian life.”
“Sir, Cadet Card did try to help him,” a cadet who is trying to help the suffocating one, says.
“Oh, Cadet Card was here, that explains things,” I mutter. Of course. The card was here and now somebody is dying on me and I can’t get on with my hangover. Of course.
“Sir, he did try to help, I sent him away because he was becoming more harm than good it was so frustrating,” she says, though she’s actually no help either, how did the cords get completely knotted around his neck??
And now I know I can strangle somebody in a room full of people and absolutely nobody will notice. Poor King. I honestly kind of hope they get him out before he actually dies. He’s not that annoying.
“Screw it, I’m just going to cut it---how did it get tied in a knot Cadet---who are you?” I ask, pulling my knife from my pocket and cutting the tubes, freeing the cadet who collapses to the bunk, gasping in relief.
“Sir, Cadet Tom,” the girl says, standing at attention.
“Right, who’s he?” I ask. I should pull a 314 for ruining equipment and I totally would if I could see straight or if talking didn’t cause my whole head to vibrate. Or that’s what it felt like.
“Cadet King,” she says.
“Keep an eye on him, all right, Cadet Tom?” I ask, walking away, “But be careful.” Don’t you die too.
“Are you okay?” Nicole sits next to me as I gasp for air.
“I’m so useless, Titus tried to help me put it on, but I messed it up,” I sob, my throat still aching.
“It’s okay, those things are tricky, at least the MTI got you out and he didn’t get mad,” she says, taking fresh tubing from her backpack and beginning to thread it onto my tank.
“Yeah,” I say, wiping my face with my sleeve.
“How are things?” Titus asks, coming to sit behind me.
“You were no help,” Nicole says.
“I tried, didn’t I?” he asks, innocently.
“You can’t get frustrated with him,” she explains to me. I nod innocently.
“I know, I’m sorry King,” I say, clapping him on the back. thank you for participating in Card’s macabre experiments please play again soon.
Very soon.
“Let me help you get it on, Tom go ahead and suit up yourself, I’m all ready,” I say kindly. That was too easy. Nobody even asked me how it had happened. But the real question is, will it work again?
“You don’t mind?” King snivels.
“Not at all,” I say. it will be a pleasure.
“Cadet Leavitt, get your boots on now!” one of the MTIs snaps.
“Yes, sir,” I shout, not even looking up. What does it look like I’m doing is what I want to say? I understand the need for speed and efficiency. I don’t understand the need for constant verbal harassment. I sigh. I miss home more every day. and there’s a long way to go.
“Ignore him,” a rather busty girl says, leaning down from her bunk. She’s only half-dressed herself but I’m guessing the MTIs like it that way.
“Ma’am?” I ask, surprised one of these lovely Project 10 is even talking to a natural-born civilian like myself.
“Ebbel, he likes to hear himself bark,” she rolls her eyes, “My name’s Darla, by the way. Darla Richards.” She points where her name tape should be, across her chest, then giggles because she’s not wearing her blouse. Or bra.
“Thanks,” I say, I do not like it here. I do not like being flirted with. I do not like these stuck up Project 10s who think they’re God’s gift to the Milky Way. I also don’t like being flirted with obviously.
“Don’t you have a first name, Leave-it?” she asks, cocking her head and pronouncing my name incorrectly intentionally. Like that will actually endear me to her? When in the history of bad ideas has to antagonize somebody actually gotten them to be sexually attracted to you?
“Not here,” I say, standing. I should go get my flight-ready. Deneb flight certainly needs work. she’s Coruscant, so hopefully, I’ll never have to speak to her again.
Great. They are almost all dressed and ready to go and now I can probably go back to bed for at least two hundred more years or until my head stops hurting whichever comes last. I lean against an unoccupied bunk and try not breath too heavily, that---wait for it---hurts my head.
Almost all of them are out the door, my Liesel is readying her flight she’s doing such an excellent job, I’m so proud of her she’s much more competent than I am, as is evidenced by the fact that I’m standing here in this situation. Good, things are going okay, though. I haven’t been caught yet. and a few moments after she goes out the door, I can follow make sure that idiot Ebbel doesn’t shout at her too much. Good, she’s walking out, I can walk out right now that would look natural, wouldn’t it?
“Sir, Cadet Card reports,” Card positions himself in front of me, at attention.
“Report,” I say, annoyed with him more than I already was.
“Sir, my wingman appears to be suffocating,” he says, and I look over at the bunk where a cadet is trying desperately to get an oxygen cord unwrapped from around his neck. His face is turning blue.
“How the hell did this happen?” I ask, immediately pulling my knife from my pocket and cutting the tube, freeing the boy’s neck which is red with marks from the tight piping. The boy gasps and sobs. Card crawls in next to him and holds his head, putting his own mask over the boy’s face to get him air.
“Here, it’s okay Logan, I’m so sorry, how do you manage to keep wrapping it around like that?” Card asks, sympathetically. Maybe he isn’t so bad he is being nice to the boy even if he could’ve been more urgent about asking for help.
“Take him to IDMT not you---,’ I say to Card, I spin around looking for another Cadet, “You—Cadet Tom, escort Cadet King to IDMT make sure he’s breathing all right, let them give him something to settle him.”
“Yes, sir,” Cadet Tom says.
“Sir, I feel responsible for him,” Cadet Card says.
“Go to your flight, damn it and stop telling me what you think you should do,” I snap, “Get your flight outside before I pull another 314.”
“What’s going on over here---Harris, what is going on?” Thron asks, coming up quickly upon seeing that Cygnus flight is still mostly gathered here.
“This cadet was wrapped up in his oxygen tubes,” I explain.
Card School of Asphyxiation is now at a close I’ve hoped we’ve both learned a little something from this. Namely that I can, in fact, strangle somebody twice in the middle of a room full of a hundred people and get away with it. that and I think there’s a broader comment about society in there as well. but the main lesson of the day was that I can, in fact, strangle somebody twice using the same weapon within a matter of minutes and not be implicated.
“Of course, somebody’s going to IDMT, IDMT, that’s not a bad idea,” I’m talking to myself in public now that can’t possibly be a good sign.it was a bad sign when I started talking to myself when I was alone, it’s really bad that I’m doing it public and can’t actually stop myself that’s really bad.
“Cadet---Tom, leave him, I’ll escort this Cadet to IDMT,” I say, taking the shoulder of the boy who was chocking, who still appears to be breathing heavily.
“Yes, sir,” she says, nodding quickly before running off to join her flight.
“Come on kid,” I say, as he sobs.
“Good morning, sir,” he says, past deep breaths.
“Ah, shut up,” I say.
Chapter 8
“W
hat are your spacemen doing with that ladder?!!”
I really don’t like ebbed all that much. I know it’s his job but---I really don’t like him that much.
“Sir, they are climbing on the roof,” I say, painfully.
“And why, cadet leave-it----” seriously? Won’t that get old? Apparently not. “Are they climbing on the roof???”
“Sir, because I told them to,” I say. I am so in the brig. So so so in the brig.
“And why did you tell them to climb on the roof???”
“Sir, because my guidon is on the roof, and I need it back,” I say, weakly. He was taking so long inside, I had been hoping to be done with the deed before he got out. Teaches me to hope.
“All right, can anybody else tell me why denab’s guidon is on the roof??? Anybody???”
“No, sir,” I say, along with everyone else, except for Titus, who is laughing really hard and pretending to be coughing.
I wonder how the guidon did get to be on the roof of the barracks upside down with TC written on it in blue paint. A complete and utter mystery. I have no idea who could be responsible for that.
“Do you have no shame?” I hiss under my breath.
“Clearly not,” he giggles.
“Well how do you plan on getting it down??” ebbel is an inch from my face.
“Sir, I did have a plan, and it involved the ladder,” I say. Just send me home now. And give me something decent to eat for god’s sake.
“Think again,” ebbel paces in front of all of us. “Now, I am blaming you, flight leaders, because one of you either did it, or your spacemen did it, which means you are responsible. Got it?? So the four of you are going to go up there, and get it down. Got it? Do you understand me???”
“Yes sir,” because I joined the space forces because I’m good at climbing on ladders and things yes of course.
Time to meet my other flight leaders. Let’s see what sort of fun we are going to have, shall we?
I wonder if somebody painted Titus’ initials up there to frame him. he looks like he’s coughing, but Nicole socks him in the arm as he leaves his flight, so he may have been laughing, I don’t know. But he was in the brig last night so how could he have done it?
As you’ve probably figured out yes, the Tims did turn out to b
e useful for something. right now they look scared. They needn’t worry. I won’t betray them. Yet.
This is foolishness. I don’t know why anyone would put a flag on a roof, and now I’m being blamed for it. it’s that stupid Leavitt’s fault probably. He probably did it to get the rest of us in trouble he’s University that’s how he would think.
I crawl up on the roof faster than the other three, I am small and used to climbing on things. Liesel is second fastest, she’s second smallest as well so that follows. The two boys are last, they look hot and flustered in their heavy SBUs. And we haven’t even started running yet.
“Nice to meet all of you, I’m Titus Card,” I say, sitting cross-legged on the roof and for all intents and purposes beginning to fiddle with a bit of the flag which is nailed to the roof.
“What----did you seriously put my guidon up here to meet us?” the owner of the Guidon says. Leavitt his name tapes say. he’s big and----conventionally good looking, with grey eyes and brown hair, dimples in his cheeks and a few freckles. He’s long-legged as well---- I remember him now, he’s the boy who ran faster than me. the only one. The only one who ran faster than me on the run yesterday. He loves running, getting away from everything with those long legs. I’ll cut them off one day.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” I say, calmly. “I wouldn’t do anything like that.” I’d have somebody else do it for me. “I just thought as we were all up here away from MTIs prying eyes, we might as well get better acquainted, after all, it’s better we work together to get through this.”
“I agree,” I say, kneeling to untie a bit of the flag, or just rip it, “We all just want to graduate move on with our lives.” and meet our families. My mother is coming to graduation. And my sisters. I wanted to meet them. I wanted to throw my cap in the air and run to them and be hugged and have a family. a real family. if only for ten minutes.
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