“Not all things are as clear as they seem.”
“Regardless, Kentucky is a big state should you come to inquire as to my well-being. I’m sure it’s enough to hold the two of us.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“But it is precisely what I meant, Lyle.”
Lyle hated to hear the finality in her voice. It surged with a strength he’d never seen in her before. The determined set of her jaw tightened her slight features into severe lines, and her eyes seemed clearer, more focused, not the least bit flighty or uncertain.
He was certain she was unaware of the inner-radiance that flowed from her at that moment, in that decision. He was equally sure that a compliment from her estranged doctor/husband would not be appropriate, but they’d known a short history together, and with marriage came a certain level of intimacy which had allowed him to dig deeper into her soul, beyond the outward determination. It allowed him to peer into her chasm of sadness that filled her entire being and tore at his heartstrings.
“Would you ask David to come in now? We have some planning to do.”
Lyle dragged to his feet, not sure his legs would hold the added weight of his heart. He felt a hundred years old, and the woman he loved had noticed it.
She smiled and reached a hand toward him. “I hope you find the happiness you’re looking for, Lyle.”
He simply nodded and inched backward, away from her, their gazes saying goodbye to their torn souls. At the door, he turned and disappeared into the main office.
Chapter 12
Blaire felt alone, but strangely, not defeated. She hadn’t meant to disclose the pulsing desire to return home that had gripped her of late. She hadn’t meant to tell Lyle, but what did it matter? Blaire needed to move out of his house and start her life again, and somehow, she knew that her future would only be settled when she picked up the fragments of trust she’d left crumbled in her past.
Father—what would it be like to see him again? Could they move past the anger, the bitter words, and the disappointment? He was the only man left in her life, and she hoped forgiveness would seal the cracks of rebellion—for, she did love him. She could feel it welling up inside her like a dam being released. Too much wasted time, too much stubborn pride, and too many uncompromising convictions that offered no gain to those held captive within its lie.
The next week passed in a whirlwind. Packing her belongings was one thing, but saying goodbye to the people she’d grown to care about was more difficult than it had ever been in Kentucky. Minnesota owned a piece of her soul now, and she wondered if she’d ever see it again.
They all wished her luck, and she was pleased when they declared they would pray for her safe return, yet inside, she knew it could never be the same without Lyle. She needed to move on wherever the path of repentance took her. Blaire had changed. What she had labeled independence, she now considered a crutch for it hadn’t made her happy—bonding with the Creator and his creation is where one measured a successful meaning to life. She didn’t have it all figured out, but by the grace of God, she would, and it felt good to be back in the Savior’s favor.
Blaire’s heart pounded with the anticipation of beginning the healing process, and after God, it would continue with her father.
David had professed a loud Amen to her new revelations, and they awaited the trip to Kentucky eagerly to discuss the workings of religion in one’s life. No doubt, his conversion came as a pleasant surprise to her, and the knowledge helped explain his transformed character and better outlook on life.
“Well, are you ready, my lady. Today’s the first day of the rest of your life.” David beamed, much like the young man who had marched off to war when he’d turned sixteen. He picked up the last of her bags and helped the driver load them onto the coach.
They were off to Pelican Rapids by stagecoach and would board the train to Kentucky the next day. She debated visiting Ella Milton at the farm but decided against it—Blaire did not wish to disappoint the dear lady’s efforts with the Frazers’ not so happy ending.
Blaire stood alone in her broken home. She re-read the note she had written for Lyle and placed it on the fireplace mantle. The content was short and to the point. She’d been surprised there was so little left to say. Three months of knowing him was summarized in one short paragraph. She wished him well and was pleasantly surprised when no signs of bitterness accompanied the parting.
When she touched her soft, flat stomach, the emptiness returned, but she pushed it away and clung desperately to the facts: it was never meant to be, and the child would not have to endure the small-minded people who would surely judge. She acknowledged the numbness but refused to entertain it. Instead, she focused on moving forward. No one at home need to know that a baby had ever existed for she hadn’t even told David. It was for the best. No, not the best. Not even easier. Simply acceptable.
Blaire exhaled and resolved to dwell on these thoughts no longer; she was going home.
She placed the key beside the note and beside the key, her wedding band. Unable to stop herself, she took one final glance around the room, felt his presence, and she almost weakened. Then, Liza-Mae’s image invaded the space. Would he bring her there to their home?
“Stop it,” she scolded herself. He could bring anyone he wanted there. It was his home, not hers, and Liza-Mae was his wife, not her.
She turned abruptly toward the door, on her way to build new bridges when the old ones lay in ruin. Blaire wondered how her father would react at her sudden appearance. Perhaps, she should have wired him as David had suggested. No, she would give him no time to escape the confrontation. She would arrive on his doorstep unannounced and hope for the best.
A voice from the porch startled her. "Sorry to rush you, Blaire, but the driver wants to pull out.”
She smiled and marched toward him. “David, have I told you how much I appreciate all this?”
“This was the best idea you’ve come up with since I’ve arrived. It is my unexpected pleasure to escort you home where you belong. I just hope you’re feeling good enough for the trip with your recent tumble.”
“I feel fine, really,” she wrapped an arm around his, “and I’ll feel even better when we get away from here.”
“I’ve wired my mother that you will be joining us on the trip home. She sounded excited to see you again.” He laughed heartily. “Don’t be surprised if she accosts you about breaking her son’s heart.”
“Nonsense—your heart was not ready for me,” she said. She poked her head through the open window and yelled at the man in the driver’s seat. “We can leave now. Thank you for your patience.”
The coachman nodded, as the carriage sprang into movement. As they sped down the main street in the direction of Pelican Rapids, Blaire noted happy couples strolling arm in arm, and to ward off the pending doom, she smiled and listened more attentively to David’s jokes. Relief flooded her when he hit on her funny bone and they laughed in merriment, their voices carrying through the air.
Lyle heard the ring of Blaire’s laughter as the coach passed the infirmary. Her and David appeared happy to be leaving Spalding, and it tore at his heart that he had not made Spalding enticing enough for Blaire to stay. She didn’t even glance sideways to say goodbye to the workplace where they’d spent so many hours together. A mere glance in his direction that day might have provided him the tiniest bit of encouragement, whereas the joyful noise fading into the distance only served to dampen Lyle’s spirits further.
He stood staring after the coach, willing her to look through the window and wave goodbye, but he stood there alone, one lonely, solitary figure leaning against the infirmary door for support, letting the tears fall unabashedly down his face. His shoulders sagged, and just when his heart pleaded for him to ride after her to beg her to stay, Liza-Mae’s nagging voice broke through his concentration. He groaned, but in all honesty, he could not entirely blame the woman for breaking up his happy home in Spalding. He had deceived Blaire l
ong before his first wife had arrived by not telling her everything straight up. A woman obviously needed to know such things, and the surprise would never balance in his favor, no matter how many times he uttered the words, “I’m sorry.”
How he ached to know Blaire’s forgiveness.
Lyle watched her disappear around the last corner and etched the memory into his mind. He’d witnessed the boyish admiration in her companion’s face, his gestures, and in his eyes, and it occurred to him that her old friend could become his greatest rival. He was certainly handsome in a rugged, cowboy kind of way, and very attentive to the woman at his side who had been his childhood sweetheart, and now, Lyle’s lost love.
He felt jealousy soaring from a gaping hole in his heart, but he had no right to—or claim on—Blaire, the woman who owned his heart. It made him more determined than ever to end the sham with Liza-Mae, for whatever his future may hold, it would not be with her.
Lyle longed for a lifeline, one last opportunity for Blaire to know he still cared. He turned to Liza-Mae and said, “I need to go visit some sick patients in the back country. I’ll be gone for three days. Try to behave yourself.”
“Three days!” she yelled, but he spun around, marched back inside, shut the door firmly, and ignored her pouting pleas as she stood on the front porch.
She had backed off for once, and when things became silent outside, Lyle started to close-up shop. He pinned a sign on the door that read, “Doing the rounds: be back Thursday.” When he left, all he carried from the infirmary was a small sack of clothes and his black emergency doctor’s bag. He went straight to the livery, saddled Jasper, and by taking a short-cut, arrived in Pelican Rapids before the coach. With time to kill, he wandered the trail to the river and stood in the exact spot he’d first laid eyes on Blaire. May and springtime seemed so long ago, and throughout the summer they’d built a good life together, one that lay in possible ruin if he didn’t get a response from the family soon.
His previous idea of renting a hotel room was dismissed the moment he spotted the big oak tree in the small clearing. He decided to spend the night near the river, lying beneath a canopy of stars and drifting off to sleep while listening to the sound of water rippling over the rocks. He’d spent nights outside on the trails for different reasons, but this time, he simply needed the peace the outdoor setting provided.
Liza-Mae had stretched his patience thin; and it surprised him how hard it had been to make sense of her reappearance. One plus was that much of the turmoil he recalled about his time spent with her had somewhat lessoned, possibly due to her close call with death from the supposed drowning she’d miraculously escaped. Of course, his deductions were all speculation, for other than a few insignificant mentions, he was just as much in the dark about what had happened that night and why her parents had chosen to keep the news from him that she was alive—although it was likely they’d seen it as an opportunity to rid the family of the son-in-law they did not want. Could it be that simple?
It was getting late, and if he was going to grab some grub on the run, now was the time. After devouring a hot meal at the hotel, he stopped at the bakery to pick up a sweet nibble for later.
As Lyle started down the road, he overheard a conversation. Actually, it was a familiar name the one man mentioned that stopped him in his tracks, and he backed against the alley side of a building and listened.
“Yes, sirree, Mr. Davis—Spalding is just a day’s ride from here. You can rent or purchase a horse from the livery. The new fella has quite a stock.”
“Thank you,” the young man said as he tipped his hat and started back toward the Falcon Livery.
Lyle watched him go. Davis was Blaire’s maiden name and the well-dressed man was the spitting image of her. Perhaps a sibling coming to check up on her? Fragments of conversation started to fit together and Lyle hurried from the shadows to step onto the boardwalk. The man had to be Blaire’s brother—the same Timothy Davis that Liza Mae had mentioned meeting by chance while in Kentucky a couple months back. Lyle’s suspicions went up a notch at the connection and what it could possibly mean for the four of them—Blaire, Liza-Mae, Davis and him. He could understand a family member coming to check on Blaire’s welfare but because of his association with Liza-Mae and the fact that she had beat around the bush the entire time she spoke of the man, fed Lyle’s doubts.
Should he confront him and tell him that his sister was due to arrive on the coach any minute? No. Not if the man was here to meet Liza-Mae and not Blaire at all. He didn’t know enough to play his cards just yet. Yet, telling Timothy of his sister’s arrival may be the ammunition he needed to keep Blaire in Minnesota while he solved his living nightmare.
Lyle’s heart raced, imagining that the whole charade could possibly soon be over. He hoped an extended time period would provide a few more days for him to unravel this chaos. He followed the man and watched as he went into the livery but came out a few minutes later empty-handed. Davis continued on down the road and disappeared inside the hotel. Because of the close proximity to the coach stop, Lyle hoped the bloke would not be gazing out the window when the stage pulled in, for surprise was Lyle’s biggest advantage as the events of the day unfolded.
At the river, he stretched out on his bedroll and plunked his saddle at one end to use as a pillow. Jasper munched on clover and drank fresh river water. Lyle’s tummy was stuffed, and the soft grass felt so comfortable that he soon nodded off. He hadn’t mean to fall asleep, for he’d wanted to be at the station when the coach had pulled in, to see where Blaire went for the night, but after a long day of hard riding, his body had betrayed him.
He felt a presence, his reflexes groped for his sidearm, and his eyes bolted open to see Blaire standing over him with her hands on her hips and that no-nonsense grimace on her face. Lyle jumped to his feet, nearly colliding with her.
“Blaire, what are you doing here?”
“The very question on my lips, as well,” she said.
Lyle ran his fingers though his hair and fumbled with the rim of his hat, twirling it around and around in his fingers. Finally, she grabbed it from him and dropped it on his blanket. “You know why I’m here, so the question still remains why you are here and not helping your wife move into the house.”
“She is never moving into our house, Blaire. I’m hoping she is long gone before winter sets in so I can still travel to Kentucky to find you. That’s my plan.”
“Then, you brought her along…why? To find more answers to your riddle?”
“No,” he said. “I came to see you. I never got a chance to say goodbye in Spalding.”
“We said our goodbyes. There is nothing more to be said.”
Lyle fumbled for words. “Maybe there is.”
“You have my full attention.”
“I was in town earlier and saw a person of interest, looking to buy a horse and go to Spalding.”
“Secretive, are we? Who is this person of interest?”
He bit his lower lip before blurting out, “Your brother.”
Blaire’s eyebrows lifted, and she smiled. “And how would you know he is my brother? I wager a guess that it is the one you warned me to watch out for?”
“I suspect so. I heard someone call him Mr. Davis, and he looks just like you, Blaire,” Lyle said. “Do you know any reason why he’d be so far from home?”
“Maybe he attended the same agricultural lecture as David.”
“Don’t you think David would have mentioned that to you earlier?”
“I suppose so,” she said. “Then, I have no idea why my brother would be here, unless, of course, my father sent him to check up on me, which would not surprise me in the least. It seems I am just as curious as you. I suppose you also know where he is staying.”
“At the hotel off Birch Street.”
“You missed your calling—you should have been a Pinkerton agent,” she said and could not stop the grin he loved from spreading across her face. “That’s the same hotel where I�
��m staying. I couldn’t pass up coming here one last time. I’d hoped to see the sunset and the magical display as it extends across the rippling water.”
“Please, feel free to join me. I was enjoying the same scenery myself.”
“You were not, Lyle Frazer—you were sleeping.”
“I am in your debt, then, for the sunset, the starry night, and tomorrow’s sunrise is the very reason I chose to sleep on the riverbank instead of locked behind four walls.”
She grinned. “I’m jealous.”
He patted the blanket. “Lots of room for two.”
An air of sadness replaced the light conversation, and he surrendered. “Sorry. Bad idea.”
“It’s a great idea…just bad timing.” Blaire turned toward the sinking sun. “At least I’m on cue to catch one of nature’s spectacles.”
“I had so much I wanted to say, Blaire,” Lyle said, testing her waters of acceptance. “I refuse to give up and will spend my entire life winning your hand all over again.”
He inched closer, and she did not run, He took some comfort in that.
Lyle dared hope there might be some twinge of regret at leaving her life there, and perhaps even at leaving him. He approached her cautiously, lest she slam the door of communication in his face.
“Hello, Lyle,” she whispered with a raspy voice.
“I love hello.”
“It really wasn’t necessary to disrupt your work schedule just to see me off.”
“Nobody is dying. Work can wait.”
“Lyle, let’s don't do this again.”
“I need you to know that I still care,” he said reaching for her wrists. “And I need to know that you still care."
“I know that you care, Lyle. How much you’re willing to give up to have me is the biggest question that separates us.”
“That’s not why we’re apart, Blaire, surely you know that.”
“I don’t know anything, except that now you want to drag my brother into your tangled mess.”
Blaire's Ambushed Heart Page 11
