By the time he had decided not to get flowers, the question was moot anyway. He was pulling up outside Patrick’s, wiping his palms on his thighs, and checking his reflection in the rear view mirror. He took a deep breath and got out of the car.
(You got this)
He rang the bell, taking a couple more deep breaths as he waited for Patrick to answer.
The door opened and there he was, looking good enough to eat. His smile was wide, his shoulders were so fucking broad, and goddam, that vein on his arm was perfect.
“What? No flowers?” he asked.
(Shit)
“I debated.”
“It’s fine. You’re forgiven. You look good.” Patrick leaned in and gave Andrew a light peck on the lips. “Come in.”
“You look good, too,” Andrew said, stepping in. “It smells good.”
“Almost ready. Can I get you something to drink?” Patrick paused. “Water?”
“Water would be good,” Andrew said.
Andrew followed Patrick into the kitchen, where he stopped short. The dining table was set, and had two candles actually burning. “Candles? Really?”
“I told you. I want to do this right.”
“When you do it right, you do it right.”
“That’s why flowers would have been nice,” Patrick said, a pouting look on his face. Andrew laughed and punched his shoulder. Patrick laughed back. “Sit down. I’ll get that water.”
Andrew sat down, watching Patrick. He was truly beautiful, and that ass, it was legitimately the best ass Andrew had ever seen. He pushed down that thought. The chances of Patrick bottoming were pretty slim.
“How was your day?” Patrick asked.
“Good. I napped. Someone woke me up last night.”
“Sorry about that.”
“Don’t worry. Breakfast and dinner in one day? That makes up for it.”
“I hope dinner’s good. I’ve never made it.”
“I’m sure it will be.”
“It’s almost ready.”
“Can I help?”
“No, I’ve got it. You just sit there.”
“A guy could get used to this,” Andrew said.
Patrick looked over. “Everyone deserves some special treatment once in a while.”
“I won’t complain.”
“You’ve never had this, hey?”
“This? The chicken, you mean?”
“No. I mean, someone to, I dunno, take care of you.”
“Not really, no.”
“What was your first boyfriend like?”
“Like any other nineteen-year-old guy. It was sex, great sex, but then it was onto something, and someone, new.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I was just as much to blame.”
“Before Christy, I dated this girl Carol. We were together two years, but she moved away for college and we just called it quits. Then I met Christy not long after.”
“So just the two relationships then?”
“Yes. You?”
“More than two.” Patrick set the food down on the table. “It looks great.”
“Thanks. Dig in. More than two, hey?”
“Yes.”
“How many more?”
“Are you asking for my number?”
“I guess.”
“Probably higher than you’d like to know.”
“You always hear about how easy it is for gay guys.”
“Easy? No. Not at all.”
“I didn’t mean, like, in life. I just meant, dating and sex and stuff.”
“Think about it though. I’m sure you were socialized romantically at a really early age. When was your first date?”
“I dunno. I was twelve, I think? Thirteen?”
“Exactly. We don’t date until we come out, and that’s usually older, so we’re already like sexually mature. So those dates you had at twelve, before things are complicated by being sexually mature, we have way later, and sex is part and parcel of it all right from the beginning.”
“I guess I never thought about it.”
“Why would you have really?”
“Wait. What makes you think I wasn’t sexually mature at twelve?”
Andrew grinned. “Sorry, didn’t mean to cast any doubt on your uber masculine prowess.”
“I’ll get over it, I guess, as long as tell me how good the food is.”
Andrew took a bite. “It’s great. Really.”
“Good.”
They ate in silence for a minute or two. It wasn’t awkward, just a comfortable silence. The chicken really was good, served on a nice bed of pasta. Andrew looked across the table. A beautiful man, with an amazing heart, had made him this great dinner, and was sitting there, looking just adorable, and the candles were this unexpected, perfect, romantic touch, and...
“Why are you staring?”
Andrew blinked. “Was I?”
“Yes. Did I spill?” Patrick looked down at his shirt.
“No. This is just... this is just nice.”
“Oh.” Patrick smiled. “Good.”
“I haven’t had a date like this in a long time.”
“What about Kent?”
“It was nice. This is nicer.”
Patrick smiled a bit wider. “Good.”
Could Andrew’s attention and approval mean that much to this beefy army guy? Shouldn’t Andrew be the one beaming from little validations? Everything in Andrew’s history, everything in the history of every gay man Andrew had ever talked to, indicated this shouldn’t be so easy. Patrick shouldn’t be so comfortable.
“So never attracted to a guy before, hey?”
“No. I even looked around at the grocery store today, trying to see if I found any of them attractive.”
“Oh?” Jealousy flared up.
Patrick smiled. “Don’t worry, I didn’t.”
“Oh.” Andrew smiled back. “Good.”
“Does it ever happen?”
“What?”
“That someone’s just attracted to one guy.”
“Anything happens, Patrick. Sexuality, it’s impossibly complicated. And fluid. Things change, and evolve.”
“So you could be attracted to a woman some day?”
“What? God no.” He paused. “I don’t know. I guess I can’t say never. Us sitting here, that’s something I would have said never would happen, not to be sitting here like this. But I don’t see it happening.”
“I didn’t see this happening.”
“That’s valid.”
“I’m glad it did though.”
Andrew felt warm from the blush that crept up his face. “I am too.”
“You done there?”
Andrew looked down at his plate, surprised to find it empty. “Yes.”
Patrick stood up. “I’ll clear.”
“No. Let me.” Andrew got to his feet.
“Actually, I can clear later. Do you feel like dessert?”
“I could find room. What’s on the menu?”
“This,” Patrick said, and he was suddenly kissing Andrew.
Thoughts stopped as Patrick’s hands ran through Andrew’s hair. Andrew pressed himself tight up against Patrick, and could feel Patrick’s cock pressing hard up against his leg. Andrew immediately sprung erect. Andrew’s hands roamed over Patrick’s body. He really couldn’t get enough of it. Patrick’s hands ran down Andrew’s back and up his shirt. The feel of those strong hands on his bare skin was incredible and Andrew pulled his mouth away only long enough to moan.
Patrick was wearing a button-up and Andrew needed it off of him. Now. Trying not to break the kiss, his hands squirmed between them, blindly working buttons open. His fingers slid through the soft hair that covered Patrick’s chest, and grazed a nipple.
Patrick pulled away. “Want to take this to the bedroom?”
Andrew nodded, and Patrick grabbed his hand, practically dragging him down the hall. There, he spun around as he dropped to the bed, pulling Andrew down
on top of him. Andrew popped the button on Patrick’s jeans and reached in to grab Patrick’s cock.
“Fuck!” Patrick moaned.
It was all the encouragement Andrew needed. He scrambled onto his knees between Patrick’s legs, pulling Patrick’s pants off, and then leaning down to lick his still underwear-clad cock. Patrick groaned, thrusting his hips up. “Please.”
Andrew looked up at him and grinned, sliding the underwear off and throwing them off the bed, even as he reached down and grabbed Patrick’s cock at the base. He looked at it once, a cock as perfect as the rest of him, and then took it into his mouth. Patrick buckled underneath him, his hands on Andrew’s shoulders.
Andrew slid his hand up and down the shaft, his thumb caressing the tip on every upstroke. He kissed the cock and lowered his mouth to Patrick’s balls, taking first one then the other in his mouth. All the while, his hand continued to work Patrick’s dick. Then his tongue slid down from the balls, and Patrick tensed, looking down and saying “what-”
“Trust me,” Andrew said, his hand not stopping. Patrick lay his head back and Andrew licked his way from Patrick’s balls down his taint. He was briefly hesitant; they had just eaten and what did straight guys know about any kind of anal prep, but as he breathed in deep, he could tell Patrick had probably showered just before Andrew had come. His tongue found its way over Patrick’s asshole.
“Andrew, I-”
“Shhhh,” Andrew said, and then his tongue darted out and into Patrick.
Patrick groaned. “Oh God!”
With both hands now, Andrew pulled Patrick’s legs apart, his mouth working balls and thighs and again and again over Patrick’s hole. “Do you like that?” he asked, already knowing the answer by the way Patrick’s hands were gripping the sheets.
“Yes. Fuck. I-”
“Good.” Andrew took Patrick’s cock back in his mouth while his fingers slid up and down Patrick’s crack. He let his spit run down Patrick’s shaft, which got his fingers nice and wet. He ran one over the hole, and Patrick moaned again and spread his legs further apart. That was all the confirmation and consent Andrew needed.
He sucked one of his fingers, getting it extra wet, and then slowly worked it into Patrick’s ass. Patrick tensed under him and then gasped and relaxed into it. Andrew took Patrick’s cock back into his mouth as he worked the finger in deeper and deeper and then...
“Shit, I’m-”
Andrew tightened his mouth around Patrick’s dick as it spurted down his throat. He kept the suction on until Patrick finished shooting, then pulled his finger out, and looked up at Patrick. He was looking down at him.
“Sorry. That was just...” He was out of breath, his chest heaving.
“Good?”
“I couldn’t help it.”
“Good.” Andrew grinned devilishly. “I’m glad you liked it.”
“I wanted to last longer, but...” He shrugged a bit.
“We have all night. Don’t worry.”
Patrick propped himself up with his hands. “You’re right. We do.” He wagged an eyebrow. “And that means it’s your turn now.”
PATRICK
Had he really just had a finger in his ass? And not just had one in there. Actually enjoyed it? He sure as fuck had. He didn’t know the last time an orgasm had hit him that fast and that hard. Still, a finger was a lot smaller than a dick, especially Andrew’s dick. Seriously, where did he hide that when he was in drag?
Now, Patrick wanted one thing and one thing only. He wanted to make Andrew feel as good as Andrew had just made him feel. He wanted Andrew to explode. And he wanted to taste it when he did.
He’d tasted his own. Once. When he was a teenager. That had been more by accident though. He’d been jerking off, and shot far, and just happened to have his mouth open. What he was going to do now was a far more deliberate thing.
Andrew wasn’t even naked yet. Patrick pushed him down on the bed, and held him there with a hand on his chest. His eyes stared into Andrew’s – they really were the most wonderful green – as he slowly undid Andrew’s pants. He grabbed Andrew’s cock and tugged it gently, then leaned down to kiss Andrew’s mouth. He could still taste himself on Andrew’s lips.
Down he went, pushing up Andrew’s shirt so his teeth and tongue could tease Andrew’s nipples. His hand never leaving Andrew’s cock, Patrick kissed his way down Andrew’s flat stomach, and then up the length of Andrew’s shaft, before taking the head in his mouth. His tongue circled around it and then he slowly, slowly, slowly lowered his head down it.
As Patrick sucked him, Andrew squirmed out of his pants, and when he was finally naked too, he rested a hand on Patrick’s shoulder, squeezing him. Patrick looked up and smiled, and then went back to Andrew’s cock. With his free hand, he mimicked the way Andrew had played with his balls, sliding a finger over Andrew’s hole.
“That feels good,” Andrew said, with a quiet moan.
“I’m learning from the best,” Patrick said, and he gave Andrew’s dick a long, slow stroke as he kissed his way back up to Andrew’s nipples – he had always loved nipples – and up Andrew’s neck before locking lips again. All the while, his hand continued to jerk Andrew’s cock. He could feel Andrew tensing under him, even before Andrew pulled his mouth away and whispered, “I’m getting close.”
Patrick wasn’t missing out a second time. He wrapped his mouth back around Andrew’s cock and sucked. Andrew groaned beneath him. Patrick pulled off and looked up. “Shoot in my mouth.” He started sucking again, one hand reaching up to tweak Andrew’s nipple.
Andrew’s breaths were coming raggedly. Patrick’s dick was already hard again and he reached down to stroke it while he continued sucking.
“Are you sure?” Andrew asked, the words stumbling out of his mouth. “I’m ready.”
Patrick murmured assent as best he could, and then Andrew’s body went rigid beneath him, and Andrew’s cock spasmed in his mouth. A jet of cum hit the back of Patrick’s throat. It was salty, and more just kept coming. He couldn’t keep it all in, felt it running down his face.
He looked up, giggling. Actually giggling, like some kid. “Damn,” he said. “Are all your loads that big?”
“With a guy as hot as you? Guaranteed.”
Patrick slid up Andrew’s body and wiped his mouth on Andrew’s neck, causing Andrew to slap him playfully and squirm away. “Next time,” Patrick said, “next time, I catch every drop.”
“Maybe next time, I cum somewhere else,” Andrew said, reaching down and squeezing Patrick’s ass.
It was just sex talk. Patrick knew that. But he couldn’t help but tense up. Andrew must have noticed because he immediately said, “Sorry. Was that too far?”
It wasn’t, and that’s what was bothering Patrick. He’d enjoyed Andrew’s tongue on him, enjoyed Andrew’s finger in him. Maybe he wanted more, like that, down there. He lifted himself up above Andrew, one hand on each side of him, leaned down and kissed him, then made eye contact.
“Not too far,” Patrick said. “Maybe.”
Andrew’s eyes opened in surprise.”You think? I’m surprised.”
“Are you?”
“Well, no, actually. Some of the biggest, beefiest guys I know are power bottoms, but I didn’t think you’d even be considering it yet.”
“Well, not on the first date,” Patrick said. “What kind of guy do you think I am?” He lowered himself onto Andrew, who wrapped his arms around him. He rolled over, carrying Andrew so Andrew was on top. Andrew lay beside him, resting his head on Patrick’s chest.
“Every time I think I know what kind of guy you are,” Andrew said, “you surprise me.”
“Good. That’s only fair.”
“Why?” Andrew looked up.
Patrick looked down, at those incredible green eyes, and felt a stirring in his chest. “Because you keep surprising the hell out of me.”
Andrew smiled and rested his head back down. Patrick ran his fingers up and down Andrew’s spine. “That was ho
t,” he said. “I hadn’t meant to jump you quite that fast.”
Andrew laughed. “But you had intended to jump me?”
“Well, of course.” He pinched Andrew’s butt cheek playfully. “I just don’t know what we can do for the rest of the night now.”
Andrew lifted himself up on his elbow and wrapped his hand around Patrick’s still hard dick. He looked up at Patrick, down at the dick, and back up. “I think we’ll think of something.”
Patrick grinned. “I think you’re right,” he said, and he pushed Andrew’s head down to his crotch.
ANDREW
After Patrick came again – in thick jets over his abs – Andrew lay there, idly stirring the load with a finger. Patrick was still catching his breath, and the words came out of Andrew’s mouth before he really had a chance to second think.
“Are we on the same page?” As soon as he said it, he closed his eyes in regret. It wasn’t the moment. The night had been going so well, and here he was, making things weird.
“Look at me,” Patrick said. Andrew turned his head to face Patrick, his eyes still closed. “No. Open your eyes. Look at me.”
Andrew opened them. Patrick reached down and took Andrew’s chin in his hand. “What page are you on?”
“Forget it,” Andrew said. “I shouldn’t have-”
“Yes. You should have. What page are you on?”
“I asked you first.” He stuck out his tongue, figuring humour could at least dial back the awkward.
“Mature. Very mature,” Patrick said, with a playful eye-roll. “I like you. I think you know that.”
“I like you too,” Andrew said. It was more, and less, than he’d hoped, but what was he expecting, really?
“Come up here.” Patrick pulled Andrew up, so their faces were level. He kissed Andrew softly on the tip of the nose. “Remember the other day, we were talking, and I said I didn’t date in part because everyone I date needs to be a suitable potential second mom for Peter?” Andrew nodded. “That hasn’t changed. I still have to put his needs above my own.”
Andrew broke eye contact. He had ruined the moment and now this whole gay-for-you fantasy he’d created in his head was about to dissolve.
A Fluid State Page 15
