by Eden Butler
Kai let her move him, let the tears flow as she pressed him close—his mouth against her neck as he mourned Keeana, his fingers clinging to her back as that heavy weight threatened to keep him chained to the floor.
“Live your dream, koa la koa. Be bigger than this island,” Keeana had told him. “We’ll always be yours no matter who you become.”
She’d worn pigtail braids when he met her and cursed more than any other boy in school. She cursed so much the day Keola was born her mother had to leave the room and pray some place she thought God wouldn’t hear her daughter’s mouth.
And when she held Keola in her arms…
Kai couldn’t hold back anymore. His control failed him and he wrapped his arms around Gia, burying his face against her shoulder, letting her thick, soft hair soak up each tear as they came.
“I’m sorry,” he said, but he wasn’t sure who that apology was meant for. “I couldn’t…I’m so sorry…”
“Shh, Kai…it’s okay. You’re okay,” Gia told him, moving her arms around him, pressing against him, giving him warmth and gentleness and release with every healing touch she made against his neck. “You’re okay…” She angled her head, brushing his temple with her lips, whispering against his ear, rubbing his shoulders, stroking his hair and he held onto her. “Shhh…” she continued, slowing to kiss the top of his head. Then Kai began to ease; the comfort she gave him filling the dark, desperate spaces that had only grown since the second Nalani called him to deliver the worst news of his life.
He loosened his touch, closing his eyes against her lips kissing his skin, and her nails moving across his forehead, until she held his face again, smoothing her thumbs back over the contours of his jaw and the slope of his cheeks, soothing, calming with her mouth pressed in a gentle, soft kiss against his.
Kai blinked at the touch, moving his hands to her arms, holding her still, wanting her mouth to stay there, to move deeper, fuller. She gave so much to him, just with that one kiss—all taste and touch that he’d missed and craved and needed right then.
Gia began to pull away from him, releasing a small gasp when she opened her eyes to find Kai watching her, likely seeing every dark and desperate thought that filled his head about her, only her, when she looked at him.
“Kai…” she started, reminding him of the same warning she’d given him that night in her apartment when he’d been so desperate to taste her everywhere.
There was so much he wanted from her. So many things he craved from Gia alone. But this moment, this precise second wasn’t about either of them. It was about pain and loss, something he knew she remembered. Something he understood she was trying to help him see his way through.
The look she gave him said a lot, things Kai hoped she’d remember later, but the shift in her expression moved quickly and the pulse of whatever had her kissing him, looking for all the world like she wanted him too, left her eyes.
Kai wanted to cry for a wholly different reason. Instead, he let Gia rub his cheek again, let the warning pass and took the small movement of her head for the refusal it was.
“Come on,” she told him, pulling Kai to his feet. “You’re exhausted.
The defeated man followed Gia to bed.
THEIR BREATHS HAD EVENED out and settled. From the opened window above them, Kai could make out the slow crash of the waves as they moved against the beach and the tinkering music of a wind chime glittering against the breeze. The moon was bright and made the bedroom a hazy gray through the cotton drapes as they brushed against the window. Kai couldn’t sleep, not for the distraction of his broken heart or the rustle of the island life around him.
It was Gia.
Always, Gia, it seemed to him, that broke apart his good sense and eradicated his patience. She lay next to him on the pillow, the soft curve of her hip covered by a thin, white sheet silhouetted in shadow and that gray moonlight; the edges of her sleep shirt lifted at the waist so he spotted the dips of her hip and the low curl of black ink that disappeared under her shirt and along her spine.
He could remember clearly how she tasted, how she moved against him that night on his balcony; how Gia seemed to want him, seemed eager for him. Kai had spent night after night recalling the exact feel of her body, how soft she was, how tight, how anxious she made him, how much she made him smile, how powerful she was, how fearless—everything about her made him want her more, made him want to just be near her.
And now? Tonight? This week?
She held him up, just by the sheer force of her will. When he had no strength for anyone, least of all himself, Gia was there, right next to him, giving him some of her.
Christ, how he wanted her.
How he needed her.
Kai turned, stuffing the pillow under his chin, debating the wisdom of reaching out just to lay against her. He wondered how closely she’d fit against him. He wondered if that sparking connection he’d felt a hundred times between them would fire up and ignite if he curled his arm around her waist or moved over her and kissed her neck.
Gia inhaled, her entire body moving in one solid movement as Kai watched her, then she turned onto her back, shifting to face him and he forgot how to breathe when she blinked once, those beautiful, round eyes trained on his face.
He didn’t know what to say. Kai thought of begging to kiss her, just once, but then Gia took all hesitation from him when she reached up to touch his face, moving her body so close that their thighs pressed together.
“This might not be…”
He covered her mouth with a kiss, taking the excuse from her before she made it. “I’m not looking for your sympathy right now,” he told her, his heart thudding when Gia slipped her nails under his shirt.
“Then what do you want from me?”
“What I’ve always wanted, ku'uipo …” He took her face, kissing her so hard Gia dug her nails in deep, making Kai groan against that sweet, stinging sensation. “I…I want everything you have.”
Wordless, Gia pressed against him like she’d always wanted him, had never stopped once, but it wasn’t some wild, eager thing that drove them to the brink. This was a small surrender that was part longing, part solace and Kai didn’t want to rush either. He wasn’t sure of anything but how much he loved the taste of her tongue in his mouth and how grateful he was when Gia gave back every kiss he offered like she couldn’t get enough of him.
She pushed him back, moving over him, coming closer, deepening her kiss, inhaling as he responded. He’d wanted her for so long. He needed her now and Kai would take all she offered.
When Gia brushed against him and her breast connected with his chest, her legs angling around him, Kai responded, holding her around the middle, using his hand to press them closer together. Their bodies were hot, still mildly damp by the rain and the frantic breaths that connected when that kissed continued.
God, he could feel her everywhere, the stroke of her nails against his scalp, the impression of her breast as she leaned into him, the slide of her legs when she moved against him. She didn’t speak when she broke away. Gia only looked over his face, waiting for him to stop her, give her back the distance from earlier. But Kai wouldn’t stop her. Not when she had become someone he found it wasn’t easy to walk away from and still remain sane.
Without uttering a sound, Gia leaned back, tearing off her sleep shirt, her round, perfect breasts bouncing in the low light. He could only make out the shape of her body in the darkness and hint of her soap when she brushed her hair off her shoulder. She chewed on her bottom lip before gripping the hem of his shirt to yank it over his head, her fingers greedy, running over his skin like she couldn’t believe how much of it there was. Kai thought this moment was like walking on a cloud, seeing her like this, watching the confident woman he knew, the woman who’d pushed him, demanded so much from him this season, seem a little anxious to be so bare and vulnerable in front of him.
The only light in the guest room came from slivers of moonlight that peeked in through the half
open curtains. It made Gia’s skin look hazy and softer than it normally did. It made her seem like some sort of angel sent right to Kai to eradicate the pain he thought would keep him from breathing.
In the moonlight, Kai could make out the shape of her breast, his mouth watering, and he rubbed his thumb over her nipple, moving the pebbled skin between his fingers, loving how she reacted, how she moved her hips against him, arching over his lap when he held onto her back.
She was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen; a perfect storm of fierce strength in the sharp curve of her toned body and soft roundness of her generous breast and ample ass. Hell, how he wanted to taste every inch of her, feel her wrapped around him and never come up for air.
Kai was going to reach for her, lick and taste and touch what she offered, but Gia didn’t give him a chance. She leaned over him, pushing him back against the mattress, her fingers moving to his shoulders as she kissed him, her lips soft, gentle against his mouth, then over his neck. She laid him out with his arms stretch, straddled over him as she kissed every stretch of skin she moved across on her slow trek over his body.
“Gia…ah,” Kai whispered when she moved her tongue over his flat nipple and across his chest, fingernails teasing his ribs, her hot center against him, teasing his cock with every move she made. Her hair was damp from the shower she’d taken, but still soft when he brushed it in his fingers, loving the sensation of her tongue and mouth against his chest, then down his stomach as he held onto her.
“Kai,” she started, looking up at him with her fingers moving to his belt. “You’re beautiful. So damn beautiful.” And Gia smiled, her gaze focused on him as she unfastened his belt and jeans, as she took him from his shorts. He was going to tease her for throwing his own words back at him, but Gia wasted no time licking him, her warm mouth covering over the tip of him, her hand curled around his base and then she took him all and Kai forgot all about teasing her.
He fought the urge to move his hips and instead gripped the sheet again, marveling at how fucking glorious she looked with him in her mouth and how much better this felt than anything he had imagined about them together. She made small noises as she sucked him, indistinct sounds that made him want to slam into her mouth, made him want to flip her over and service her the same way she did him. Kai closed his eyes, fighting the sensation of wanting to explode right then. It was almost too much, the feeling overwhelming and Gia seemed to sense this, to understand he didn’t want this to be how he took comfort from her. She gave him a few more slow strokes with her hand and mouth before she pulled away, moving back long enough to rid him of his shoes and jeans.
Kai fought the impulse to grab her, to have her hard and desperate on his cock. He wanted her too much, but he would wait, let her lead, let Gia do whatever she wanted with him.
“Do you want to touch me?” she asked, coming back to straddle him, rubbing her hand over her stomach. He nodded slow, licking his lips when she tugged on his hands and pressed them to her breasts. “Touch me everywhere, Kai.”
He sat up, teasing her with his fingers then holding her breasts between his hands, cupping them, pinching the nipples until they were hard and Kai wanted them in his mouth. When he licked each one those small noises Gia made became louder and when he sucked on them, the noises strengthened into a moan.
“Kai, yes…” she started, curling her arms around his head, holding his mouth to her breast, feeding him with more than her body. He was ready and from how she moved against him—the quick rhythm of her hips on his, the wetness he felt when her pussy grazed his cock told him she was ready too.
He angled himself, holding his dick in hand, teasing her with the tip, looking up to watch her face as she went to her knees, giving him better access to her. But Gia didn’t relinquish control often and even as he held himself, as he teased her body, she was the one who demanded.
“You like that? Feeling me against you?” He nodded again, unable to find the words, knowing anything he said would sound either too desperate or too stupid. She reached down, leaning against him as she covered his hand with hers, both of them stroking him, then guiding his cock against her wet lips. “You feel how much I want you?” She moved him, letting just the tip breach her lips and Kai released himself, swallowing as Gia played with him. “Do you want it slow?” She demonstrated by inching down on him, the heat of her pussy wrapping tighter and tighter the more of him she took. “Or do you want it hard?” Again, Gia demonstrated, slamming onto his cock, pushing Kai against the mattress. “Tell me what you want from me. Tell me how to make you feel good.”
“This,” he said, grabbing her hips, holding her against him. He leaned up, placing a kiss against her breasts, cupping her while he thrust up, chipping away at the control she had. “I want you hard and slow, ku'uipo. I want you wet and ready.” He kissed her neck, tangling his fingers in her hair, moving her head to take her mouth. “I want you any way I can have you. Any way that makes you want me too.” She squeezed against him, rocking her hips, just, it seemed, to remind him who held the upper hand, but Kai didn’t care. He’d had enough of the games they’d played. He didn’t want to play anymore. “Gia…love me…” Kai moved her head so that she looked at him. “And for God’s sake let me love you.”
She moved her forehead to his and her arms around his shoulders, covering his body like a cape. Every part of him felt touched by Gia and Kai let her take back control, let her rock him with her body, her walls clamped harder, sweeter as she moved over his lap.
“This is good. So good,” she said, taking Kai in slow, sweet strokes that left him gripping her shoulders and pulling at her hair, wanting to drive into her, but wanting Gia to take the pain he felt and twist it, make it sweet, turn it into desire, into heat, into something that felt a lot like love.
He surrendered to her control, falling back again when she pushed on his shoulders, watching her, a little spellbound by how she moved her hips, how that beautiful round ass shook and danced on top of him. How she used his body like a ride in an amusement park, rocking up and down, head falling back when Kai lifted his legs against her to hold her up, to spread her farther apart, when he couldn’t keep from licking his thumb before he moved it over her wet clit.
“Fuck, Gia…look at you. So beautiful…God, you make me want to keep you here…right on top of me…” She picked her head up, giving Kai a dazed smile, working hard the faster he moved his thumb against her. Gia pulled her bottom lip under her teeth when Kai grabbed her breast, teasing the nipple, working her as she owned his body, taking and giving, squeezing him hard…so hard that he thought he might explode right there.
“This…this is good,” she admitted, looking a little drunk, leaning forward to rest her palms on the pillow next to his head, still riding him, squeezing harder. “Shit…oh…”
He couldn’t help himself, couldn’t keep from grabbing her face, tugging her mouth to his, diving his tongue inside as he helped her keep pace on top of him, moving his hips to meet her, gripping her ass to have something to hold onto. Kai groaned into her mouth when she moved faster, his heartbeat increasing as everything in his head became sensation and heat and Gia’s sweet, wet pussy milked him.
“Oh God…yes!” she cried, pulling away from him, holding herself on his shoulders, and that beautiful woman came hard, wetting Kai’s dick, making him harder and more desperate for his own release.
It only took Gia a moment to recover, her movement slowing, but the grip still tight and she grabbed Kai’s face, looking down at him, her gaze sweet, hot as she watched him, eyes moving to scan his features, lips quirking into a sweet smile before she took his mouth. Her tongue was hard, penetrating and Gia squeezed her pussy, her movements frantic now, rocking hard, moving quicker when Kai felt his body seize up, felt that familiar ache shooting like a rocket and he held onto her, arms around that sweet body, mouth against that exposed neck as he came.
“Fucking… combustible…” he said, breath uneven, grip tight on her.
Gia collapsed on top of him, not complaining when Kai turned her, when he kept her against him to lie on the pillow next to his head. He didn’t move out of her. Kai didn’t want to relinquish the warmth of her body or the feel of how she had wrapped herself around him. He was losing his hard-on, his body ebbing into less frantic breaths, but he wouldn’t release her. Not yet.
She felt so good. So real. For the smallest moment, she belonged to him and Kai didn’t want that feeling to leave him. He wanted to stay in the balm of her body.
“Kai,” she whispered, leaning back and still he didn’t move. He clung to her waist, his mouth against her chest, inhaling, wanting to stay buried inside her. “Kai,” she tried again, this time brushing the hair from his forehead.
“Don’t say it,” he told her, looking up to watch her face. “Not yet. Just for a little while longer, be right here with me.” Gia opened her mouth, and he knew she’d give him an excuse, some logical, stupid reason for him to let her go. He didn’t want to hear it, whatever it was. “Not yet,” he said again, leaning up to take her mouth. “For now, let me pretend you’re mine.”
Gia knew…she always seemed to know what he needed most, what would make Kai happy, and just then, she gave him what he needed—she let him pretend.
17.
GIA
SHE HAD COMMITTED MANY SINS.
You don’t live a solitary life, one that still requires sporadic moments of companionship without breaking connections. Without doling out a little pain.
But none of the sins Gia had committed seemed to cut as deeply as how she’d left Kai.
