Jacob had needed to bite down hard to stop the expletives that sentence summoned. Aiden was a nice enough lad with his spiked hair and soft face. Carrying a few too many pounds he looked as if he spent most of his time at a desk and was as green as they came. It was all theory to him, books and lessons and the real world confused him at times. Only the blue-eyed boy didn’t come and ask for help. He either left things undone or made a mess of them. Maybe Jacob should talk to Mr. Martins on Monday, explain a few realities?
“Daaaaaaaad!” Noah interrupted his thoughts.
“Sorry.”
Emily tutted again as she hauled the heavy cool box from the boot.
Jacob ran over and took it from her. The fire in her blue eyes flashed but was then covered as her soft, golden hair fell over her face. It was like a curtain drawing across her anger and he was pleased for it.
“Can’t you forget work and be with your family for one day?”
The hair didn’t keep the acid from her words.
“Sorry love, I just have things on my mind.”
“Don’t we all.”
She threw the blanket on the ground and took the basket off the kids. They looked at each other and then quickly back at their tablets. Both sitting down on the edge of the blanket they kept their eyes down.
The sun warmed their skin and as Jacob walked around the blanket it started to melt away the stress. They were here, it was a beautiful day. He took a quick look around. Behind them was the burnt out ruins of an old house. It was creepy and seemed to be covered in a dark mist.
It’s a burnt out house it’s probably smoke you fool.
The old ruin of the property depressed him so he sat with his back to it and looked at the trees. The woods were dense and thick but pretty enough from the outside. There was grass for the children to play on and he could hear birds singing. Taking a deep breath he let himself relax. They needed this, they need to have fun as a family.
As he reached out for a sandwich a grasshopper hopped onto the blanket. Jacob waved his arms in front of the children and pointed.
“What is it?” Sophia’s eyes were wide with wonder.
“It’s a cricket,” Noah said. “They make that chipping noise by rubbing their back legs together. Can we catch it?”
“You can try,” Jacob said with a chuckle.
Noah stood slowly and made his way around the blanket with long exaggerated strides.
Jacob and Emily shared a smile as the boy tried to move stealthily and ended up doing everything but. His foot caught the plate of chicken legs and as his weight went on it the plate tipped. The drumsticks tumbled onto the blanket and Noah jumped back just as the grasshopper leaped back into the grass.
Noah dropped to his knees and picked up all the chicken trying to hide his giggles.
It was a lovely moment and it made Jacob realize how much he was missing.
After that the tension was gone for a moment and the food was eaten quickly and hungrily. Sausage rolls, chicken, salad, and lashings of coleslaw. To round it off, there was apple pies and orange juice.
The children stuffed their faces quickly and Jacob thought they soon forgot the arguments between him and Emily. At least he hoped so. Though, to him, it was still there. Like static in the air. It almost raised the hairs on his arm every time she reached over to pass something to the children or to grab more food.
Emily bit down on a sausage roll, closing her eyes with the pleasure. He never understood how she could eat so much and stay so slim. At forty-two she still looked trim and fit and just as desirable as the day he met her. So why was their marriage falling apart? Why didn’t they talk anymore and why did she seem to resent the fact that he worked so hard to provide for them?
“Can we play ball?” Noah asked.
“Sure,” Jacob said without thinking.
“Don’t go too far,” Emily added and she began to gather the leftovers and sort it into two bags.
The kids had healthy appetites and there was very little food left. Jacob reached out and grabbed the last drumstick as he watched Noah grab his favorite orange football from the car. It was a special world cup edition and was his pride and joy.
Something dark moved on the ruins and his eyes were pulled away. Though he tried to track the movement it was gone before he could and yet it left him with a feeling of disquiet.
“Come on,” Noah called as he ran around the picnic and out into the wilted grassland. About twenty feet away, halfway between his parents and the dark woods he put the ball down and kicked.
The ball arched into the air, a shining light hanging in the sunshine.
Sophia chased after it laughing and giggling but she couldn’t make up the distance and Noah beat her to it.
Jacob watched as the boy found two rocks to make goalposts. Then he kicked the ball, gently, to Sophia. She stumbled a little as she tried to kick it back and missed. Wheeling her arms she had another go and the ball flew back to Noah.
Jacob wanted to go join them his feet itched to stand and kick and his hands wanted to pick the kids up and tell them how sorry he was. That he would be there more in the future but would he? To keep them afloat he had to put the hours in and to do that he couldn’t be home.
“We should tidy this up before we do anything else,” Emily said.
Excited laughter rose and fell on the wind.
Something dark moved at the corner of his vision.
Jacob turned to see a smoky shape disappear into the trees.
“What!”
“I said we should tidy up,” Emily’s voice rose.
Jacob couldn’t take his eyes off the trees. Had he seen something? It must have just been a shadow, a cloud passing over the sun.
“Don’t go too far,” he called, for the woods looked dark and ominous and who knew how far they went, or what was in them. What he had seen? Only that was stupid it was just... smoke.
“J!”
“Sure.”
Paper plates were shoved into a black bag. Plastic tubs crushed nosily together and then thrown into another bag. Emily managed all of this with her back to him and he knew they had to talk. Scenarios ran through his head. Appeasing her, gentle words, encouragement, apologies... what was the shadow in the woods... near the children?
“What is it?” he yelled in frustration.
The sound of laughter drifted further away.
Emily dropped the bag and turned to him. Tears clouded ocean blue eyes and her lower lip trembled.
Ashamed of his outburst he reached out but she pulled away and sat across from him with her arms folded.
“I can’t go on,” she said without raising her eyes.
The words sliced into him, cutting deep and his own mouth fell open. What did she mean?
Slowly, she raised her head. “You’re never here, never with us, all you think about is work.”
“No... no I don’t, all I think about is you three.” And the bills, and how we keep afloat. “All I do is for you and the kids.” Why couldn’t he bring himself to tell her the situation? Maybe he couldn’t face the disappointment, maybe he was ashamed. Wasn’t he supposed to be able to provide for his family?
“Even now you’re just drifting off into your own little world. Dammit J, we’re right here. I’m right here. I need you with me... unless... is it time to end this?”
“No! No dammit no. We are a family and without you... them...” He spread his hands out before him as the words failed. How could he explain the trouble they were in? The constant worry that he wasn’t good enough, that he wasn’t doing enough, that they didn’t have enough.
“If you don’t engage with us... then all I can think is that you have someone else.”
This time her eyes locked onto his. It felt as if she was searching his reaction, his emotions, and his thoughts. It felt as if she could see right through to his soul. If she did, then surely she would understand.
Jacob let out a sigh as her eyes dropped away and she looked down. The gestu
re hadn’t been quick enough to hide her disappointment. Not only did she not believe him, but she believed he had let her down.
Jacob felt a chill run down his spine and the day seemed to darken. Though it must be just a cloud passing in front of the sun, the gloom was appropriate and depressing.
“I think we should separate for a while,” Emily said.
Jacob felt his mouth go dry as his jaw dropped open but she raised her hand to stop him speaking. Why was it so cold, so very cold?
“If you still want to be a family then you have to court us and behave like a father, a husband, and then, maybe you can come back.”
As she stopped talking, Jacob realized how quiet it was — there were no birds, no grasshoppers, even the wind was still. As his mind tried to work out how he could afford the separation he suddenly realized he couldn’t hear the children.
“Where are the children?” he asked.
“Don’t change the subject, this is as much about me as it is about them. I’m living with a stranger. Someone who doesn’t talk to me, doesn’t understand me, doesn’t listen to me. It’s lonely, desperate, and sad and I can’t go on.”
Jacob heard the words and his heart broke, but something was wrong. The air was hard to breathe and it was so dark it was like dusk and yet it could only be 3 o’clock. Where were the children?
“Emily, I understand, I hear you, and I’m sorry, but where are the children?”
This time her face seemed to change and she turned to look at the grassland. It was empty, there was nothing there, just an orange football all alone amongst the green grass.
82
The day was so dark now and yet when he looked up there were no clouds. Shaking off the cold he searched the edge of the trees. Maybe the kids had gone in there but would Noah leave his ball?
Jacob doubted it. Then he remembered the shadow, the mist, the shape... it was just a shadow.
The trees grew thickly and close together. Their trunks black and twisted. Distorted branches reached out like clasping hands and as he looked at them a deep fear grew inside of him. Where were the children?
Leaping from the blanket he ran toward the woods shouting, “Noah! Sophia! Come on kids where are you?”
The closer he got to the dark and forbidding trees the higher his voice became. As he stopped before the dark world he realized he was shrieking, hysterical. Why was he panicked so much?
Emily pulled up beside him panting heavily.
“They have just gone exploring,” she said but her eyes couldn’t hide her fear as they raced along the edge of the woodland.
Jacob wanted to blame himself, wanted to blame her. Why had they had this stupid argument when they should have been watching the kids? But it was too late now and they had to find them.
“What should we do?” Emily asked
“We have to find them. You stay here while I search the woodland. Shout, but then leave some time for them to answer.”
Emily nodded and he could see in her eyes that she was reassured by his confidence. Only he didn’t feel confident. Looking at the woodland turned his bowels to water and made his knees shake. What was wrong with him?
As if in answer, the trees murmured darkly. It reminded him of an old movie. In it a group of devil worshipers were deciding the fate of some poor victim. His imagination had already decided he was the victim. Only, this was ridiculous. The children were the victims, they were missing, and he had to find them. He had never had such an imagination so why was it bothering him now?
Emily was staring at him and he gulped down the lump in his throat.
“Just deciding where to start,” he said to hide his nerves.
Emily pointed. “Look, there’s a path there. I’m sure that’s where they would have gone in.”
She was right of course and Jacob moved to the path. The closer he got the wider it seemed, though that had to be an optical illusion, didn’t it? It was inviting him into the woods. Inviting him to what… every nerve in his body said to his death, only that had to be stupid.
Logically, he decided this must all be a reaction to Emily’s bombshell. His body was reacting in the only way he knew how. Making up imaginary monsters for him to fight, for he couldn’t fight the loss of his marriage.
Turning back to Emily he put on his most confident smile.
“They will just have gone for a walk. Just to explore the woods, who knows, they probably saw a squirrel or rabbit and followed it? You stay here, outside the trees, just in case they come back. If they do call me,” he said and tapped his jeans pocket where he kept his phone.
“Okay.” She nodded her eyes big and moist with unshed tears.
Jacob stepped into the woodland and instant darkness. Blinking rapidly, as his eyes struggled to adjust he slowed his pace to a crawl. This was not just the differential between the cover of trees in the open spaces this was something more. Turning, he could no longer see the edge of the woods, could no longer see Emily. That made no sense for he had taken no more than three paces.
Something cold and wet stroked across his neck.
For a few moments he turned on the spot, crazy with fear as his heart pounded in his chest.
There was nothing there and he surmised it must be a branch, or a cobweb. Only turning was a mistake, now he didn’t know which direction he was heading in. Though his eyes could now make out the trees and the spaces between them he could see no edge to the woodland and his fear, like a living beast chased out his terror.
“Noah! Noah can you hear me?” The noise seemed to go nowhere. There was no echo, no sense of the words traveling. It was as if they stopped the instant they came out of his mouth.
“Sophia! Sophia sweetheart shout out to daddy.”
Once more he listened. The only sound was his own heartbeat and the desperate panting that he soon realized was his own breathing.
Jacob turned around once more and then knew he had to start walking. This had to be some trick of his mind. The edge of the woodland must be around here somewhere. So he walked 50 paces in one direction and stopped. Turning around he walked 50 paces back and stopped. This time he set off in another direction and walked another 50 paces, all the time shouting out the children’s names and looking for movement in the bushes. There was nothing. He repeated twice more walking out 50 paces stopping then returning.
As he was walking back on the last time he saw a shadow cross in front of him.
“Noah, is that you?” A surge of joy runs through him and he ran towards the shadow, but it was gone and he realized there was no sound of footsteps on the soft earth.
As he made his own way across, he stood on sticks, which snapped, and twigs that cracked, and even the soft ground, covered in leaves, crunched as he walked along. However, the shadow had made no sound at all.
Once more, he turned around and called out into the darkness.
“Kids, come on kids where are you? You’re scaring your old dad.”
Silence surrounded him and his heart pounded in his chest. His forehead was slick with sweat and he wiped away a drip before it could fall. Closing his eyes he searched the darkness for any sound, any movement, but there was nothing. As he opened them a white translucent shape moved across his peripheral vision.
Turning to the left he tried to follow it but it was gone before he could focus. Then he noticed that the woods were colder. A film misted before him as he gasped for breath. What was going on?
There was the white shape again. This time he could make out the dim figure of a woman. “Hey,” he shouted and tried to follow but she disappeared into the darkness.
Something touched his back and the branches of the trees murmured angrily. They thrashed in a ferocious wind and beat at his face and head. From somewhere, a storm had blown in and his fear for the children kicked up another notch.
Scouring the trees he saw the light and ran toward it.
Branches whipped at his face, drawing blood and stunning him for a moment. Before he could move s
omething hit the back of his head and he was knocked to his knees. They sank into the ground. Stunned, winded, he tried to stand but a root grabbed hold of... caught his foot... and he tumbled down face first into the mud. It was cold and sucked him down. Pulling him like hands and he breathed in a mouthful. As it hit his lungs he coughed and choked, feeling the world go dark.
This was it, cold and darkness surrounded him and he knew that Emily was right to be disappointed, he had let them all down.
83
Light, warmth, comfort, serenity. A second was as long as a day, a day as short as a second, but all he needed was there, all he ever wanted was his. Languorously, he basked in the glow and the feeling of utter love and peace.
“Nick... Nick...”
What was that? The concept was strange to him, there was something here that wasn’t love, wasn’t peace but how could that be? Pushing the sound aside he rejoiced in the peace and the heaven that he felt.
“Nick, they need you...”
“Never.” It was the first time he had spoken in... in what seemed like decades or the blink of an eye but speaking was not peace and he pushed the word aside. He had earned this peace, this bliss and nothing would take him back.
“Nick, I can’t help them.”
There was something in the pleading that drew him and yet he knew that if he gave into it that he would lose everything. Would lose his bliss, his harmony. He would be thrown back into torment and torture and he couldn’t bear that. Not again. For hundreds of years he had watched and suffered but finally he had peace, and love and he wouldn’t give it up.
“Nick, I need you, I can’t help them alone...”
The Ghosts of RedRise House Page 46
