“Luna,” Adi called, jumping off the low wall surrounding the parking area where she and April had been waiting for me. “Over here.”
Her arms waved in the air and a grin split her face into two. I raised my hand in a wave and crossed the side street to get to them. “Hey, guys. Excited to do some shopping?”
“Yes,” she cried and ran toward me, throwing her arms around my waist for a big hug.
I returned it, squeezing her little body tight before letting go.
She looked up at me with wide eyes. “I’m so glad you came. You wear the coolest clothes.”
Glancing down at my floral-print sundress, I lifted my shoulders and ruffled her hair. “Thanks, kiddo. I’m not so sure I agree, though. Either way, I’m happy to be here.”
April came to stand beside me, her brows pulled together and curiosity burning in her eyes. “You look different.”
“What do you mean?” I asked as Adi slipped her hand into mine and started dragging me in the direction of the mall.
April followed after us, studying me intently. “You’re in a good mood. Like, better than normal. We spotted you as soon as you came around the corner and you haven’t stopped smiling since.”
“Can’t a girl be excited about a shopping trip?” I turned to look at her as we walked, batting my lashes innocently.
She snorted and narrowed her eyes at me. “Sure, but I know this is about more than that. I’ll get you to spill the beans sooner or later, so you might as well tell me now.”
“There’s nothing to tell.” I darted my eyes toward Adi, who was still a few paces ahead of us even as she held on to my hand.
“Got it,” April murmured, “but now I’m expecting juicy details about whatever this is.”
I chuckled but nodded as we pushed our way through the double doors into the air-conditioned mall. It was busy inside, but the first shop we went into a few doors down from the entrance was relatively quiet.
“Okay, ladies,” April said. “You know the drill. Everyone picks three options for round one. Adi tries them on and models each one for us to decide.”
“I’m assuming you still hold the power to veto any choice?” I asked, remembering the winter clothes fiasco of the year before.
She rolled her eyes at me. “Of course. Unless you’re offering to pay, the final decision-making power lies with me.”
“One day, Adi, you and I will hold that power,” I said, hoping against all hope that one day, I really would be able to take Adi on a shopping trip.
Our tastes tended to be similar, whereas April loved bold colors but hated print. To be fair, she also had to make more sensible choices in clothes she knew Adi would end up wearing to school. One pair of decent jeans paired with a few different shirts went a lot further than one more expensive skirt, for instance.
“That’s okay,” Adi said, giving my hand a small squeeze before releasing it. “We always end up getting at least one or two of our choices.”
I nodded, warm fondness spreading through my heart as I looked into her soft brown eyes. In so many ways, Adi was much more mature than the average six-year-old. Try as we might, April and I had not been able to shield her from certain realities, such as the fact that money was generally tight for us both.
“Let’s make those one or two choices count then.” I smiled but promised myself that once I got out from underneath the hill—since luckily it wasn’t quite a mountain—of debt, I’d spoil Adi a bit.
April stuck close to me as Adi wandered off down the aisle we were in. We moved slowly after her, not wanting to let her out of our sights but hanging far enough back that we weren’t completely obvious about it.
“So.” She bumped her shoulder into mine. “What’s all the smiling about?”
“I took your advice.” I shot her a glance before pulling a bright purple shirt off the rack. “About Cyrus.”
“Are you serious?” Her voice rang out in the quiet store. She cleared her throat and had the decency to flush when a shopper in the aisle next to us scowled at her. “What advice? About sleeping with him?”
“Yes, but keep it down,” I whispered. “I don’t want everyone in here knowing about it.”
“You’re never going to see them again, but okay.” She took the shirt from me and hung it over her arm as I rummaged through some more. “Are you going to make me go fishing for the details? Because I will raise my voice again. And use your name loudly.”
I shook my head at her. “You’re impossible.”
“I’m curious.” She lifted her shoulders and flashed me a coy smile. “Plus, you’re not exactly loose lipped with details. Since I’m living vicariously through you, I do what I need to in order to get you to talk.”
“How are you living vicariously through me?” I plucked another shirt from the rail and handed it over. “If that’s true, I’m going to have to apologize for being so boring recently.”
“Apology accepted, but it won’t get you out of telling me what happened. And when it happened.”
“Last night.” I bit my bottom lip to stop another smile from spreading. “You were right. He didn’t say no when I proposed some no-strings-attached fun.”
She lifted her hands and gave me a slow, soft clap as she smirked. “I didn’t think he would. You’re hot and you’re a nice person, which he would know considering that you’ve spent some time with him out in the real world.”
“Yeah, I’m helping him with his wedding stuff and sleeping with him. If that’s not real world, I don’t know what is.” I meant it as a joke, but April’s expression grew serious.
“It’s not his wedding, right?” She cocked her head, her eyes on mine. “I’m sure you’ve talked to him about it, but I just don’t want you to have to go through the same thing you did with Landon. Especially if you’re actively participating in the wedding planning.”
“He hates the idea of marriage and he straight up laughed in my face when I thought it was his wedding, but you’re right. I guess it can’t hurt to just make sure.”
A sliver of dread opened in my stomach. I was ninety-nine point nine percent sure the wedding wasn’t his, but what if it was? If I’d just slept with a guy who was about to get married inadvertently—again—I didn’t know if I’d ever be able to trust any man ever again.
I drew in a deep breath, trying to dislodge the icy tendrils of dread spreading from my stomach to my lungs. They wrapped around them, constricting my next breath.
No. Cyrus isn’t the one getting married. I repeated the words over and over again, but I couldn’t help the uneasiness now flowing through my veins. “You don’t think he’d lie to me about it, do you?”
“I don’t know,” she mused, concern etched into the tightened lines beside her eyes. “But after what we’ve both been through with men in the past, I think it’s best to ask him pointblank.”
“What if he lies?” Panic flared through me. “Darn it. I really hoped I wouldn’t let what happened with Landon end up with me being at this point. I can’t question everything every person with dangly bits tells me forever.”
“Look.” She brought her hands to my shoulders. “I’m not saying I think he has lied to you, nor do I think he will. I just think both of us tend to have shitty taste in men and I don’t think asking him again could hurt.”
“What we have is supposed to be fun,” I muttered. “It suddenly doesn’t feel like so much fun anymore.”
She brushed my hair behind my ears when I tucked my chin to my chest, dipping to maintain eye contact. “None of this now. You haven’t done anything wrong. If it is him getting married, you didn’t know. You’re not the cheating scumbag. He is. But if he laughed in your face, I’m pretty sure he’s not lying. It’s just a bit strange that he hasn’t given you much details about a wedding he’s planning, don’t you think?”
“Yeah, I do think.” I had thought about it, but I had ignored those little doubts because I wanted to believe him so badly. Scratch that. I’d wanted him so badly.
Als
o, I genuinely hadn’t wanted what had happened with Landon to scar me in any permanent way. I wanted to say I was over it and mean it. If I second guessed men all the time, that wouldn’t bode well for truly having moved past it.
“I dated one jerk, but that doesn’t mean they’re all jerks,” I said in a quiet voice when I noticed Adi heading back toward us. “That’s been my mantra for the last two years and I’m sticking with it.”
“Atta girl.” April smiled, but I saw the remaining worry in the depths of her chocolate brown eyes. “Just be careful, okay?”
“Okay.” My phone chimed as Adi reached us. She was holding a bundle with way more than her required three first picks, but since April and I hadn’t gotten around to picking much yet, we headed to the changing rooms with all of Adi’s choices instead.
As they chatted to the shop assistant handing them a card with the number of items she was about to try on it, I tapped out my pass code on my screen.
A smile formed automatically on my lips when I saw Cyrus’s name, but then I remembered the conversation I’d just had with April and it slipped right off.
Cyrus: Hey, you. Got that info we needed. When can we meet up?
The text itself was innocent enough if someone else had to read it. There was no nickname or kiss and hugs in it, nothing to suggest we were anything more than two people planning an event together.
Doubt threatened to close my throat, but I wouldn’t let it win. As far as I knew, I had no reason to mistrust Cyrus. I’d never caught him in a lie and he certainly seemed honest and forthcoming enough.
I swallowed past the lump, determined not to let the Landon thing stand in the way of something new, something that could be lighthearted, fun, and unbelievably orgasmic.
April was protective of me, as fiercely as ever after everything that had gone down. I knew she hadn’t meant to plant this doubt in my mind and I had to take her suggestion at face value.
All she’d said was that I should ask him, and ask him, I would. But I wasn’t going to let it eat at me. I had to keep my faith that not all men were untrustworthy jerks until they proved otherwise. I had to trust that while I knew Cyrus could be a jerk, he wasn’t necessarily an untrustworthy one.
Luna: Sunday will be good. Shop will be closed. Still working out the extended hours. That work for you?
His reply came in not a minute later.
Cyrus: Sure. See you then.
I released the breath I’d been holding through my nose. On Sunday, I would get my answers.
For better or for worse. How ironic is that?
Chapter 14
Cyrus
“Hey,” Luna said as she walked up to my car. “I really don’t need you to chauffeur me around, you know?”
“What? No ‘thanks for picking me up’?” I joked as I opened the door for her. “Because you’re welcome, Luna. I’ve already told you, you’re helping me out. The least I can do is to pick you up.”
Dropping her head against the seat, she nodded as she let out a heavy breath. “Yeah, I guess so. That’s what you keep saying.”
“Yeah, because it’s true.” My brows knitted as I glanced at her in the rearview mirror. “You okay?”
“I’m fine,” she said, but she still didn’t look at me. “Just had a long weekend.”
“What? You party it up last night or something?” I reached into the cupholders behind my center console. “Because if so, I have what you need right here. I wasn’t sure how you take it, but it’s extra strong and extra large.” I held out the cardboard takeout cup of coffee I’d stopped for on my way over and smirked. “You can thank me later.”
She dragged her lower lip into her mouth and raised an eyebrow as she took the drink from me. “Thanks, but even if I was hungover, this wouldn’t be the way to cure it. I’m not much of a coffee drinker.”
“You’re not a…” Fuck, this woman was an anomaly. “Let me get this straight. You don’t curse and you don’t drink coffee? How do you not kill people on a daily basis? And why did you suggest we go for coffee the other day?”
“Places that sell coffee usually sell tea as well.” She smiled and finally darted her eyes in my direction, holding them on mine. Something still seemed off about her, but I knew she’d let me in on what it was when she was ready. “If you hadn’t been so focused on getting the planning ‘out of the way,’ you might have noticed I ordered tea when you ordered coffee.”
“But coffee is the nectar of the gods.” I frowned deeply. “It’s my emotional support beverage. If it wasn’t for coffee, I’m pretty sure I’d have fists flying in every second of the meetings I attend.”
“I don’t have anger management issues,” she said as she shrugged, then chuckled. “Now you, on the other hand, I could imagine needing a dose of caffeine to get the day started. I’m assuming you don’t wake up well?”
“I wake up just fine. The problem comes in as soon as I connect with the world outside my bed. In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not exactly a people person.”
“Oh, I’ve noticed,” she said, her tone teasing. “Thanks for the emotional support beverage though. I might just need it to get through the morning with the Wedding Grinch.”
“You’re welcome.” I pressed the ignition button to start the engine and plucked my sunglasses out of the neckline of my shirt to slip them on. “Where do you feel like going to talk about all of this?”
“There’s a park nearby. Since you already got us drinks, why don’t we go there? It’s so nice out.”
She wasn’t wrong.
Wispy white clouds sat high in the bright blue sky. It was a perfectly windless day, and New Yorkers seemed to be taking to the streets in droves, but I hadn’t noticed any of it until she’d pointed it out.
“Yeah, sure.” I shifted the car into gear and pulled out to join the light morning traffic, following her directions to the park. “How has your weekend been so far? Why did you say it’s been a long one?”
“Just work stuff, I guess.” She picked her purse up out of the floorboard and rummaged around in it until she found her own sunglasses, then slid them on.
I was strangely disappointed that I couldn’t see her eyes anymore. They were so deep and expressive that I found I’d come to rely on looking into them to try to determine what was really going on behind them.
Guess I’m just going to have to go with my gut for now. It told me something was up with her and waiting her out was getting to me. “Work stuff?”
“Yeah.” She sighed. “I told you I wanted to extend the shop hours, remember?”
“Sure.” It had come up in one of our conversations last week. “What about it?”
“I’m just not sure how to go about doing it. I’ll figure it out, though. Don’t worry about it.”
My eyes slid to the side as I slowed for a red traffic light. “Want any help figuring it out? I don’t know if I’ve told you this, but I’m good at business.”
“You haven’t been as modest as you seem to think.” She smiled. “So I assumed even if you haven’t said it, but I’ll be fine.”
“Are you sure? I wouldn’t mind.” I wasn’t even only offering because she was helping me. Business was something I enjoyed and figuring out what she needed in hers would be fun.
Luna shook her head, a small smile still playing on her lips. She moved her hand to cover mine on the gear shift. “Thanks for offering, but I really will be fine.”
“Okay.” I let out a breath and rolled my lips. Obviously, something was going on with Luna’s shop, but I couldn’t help her if she wouldn’t talk to me about it.
Deciding to ask about it again once we knew each other a little better, I pulled into the parking lot she directed me to. “The park is right around the corner. We can walk the last few blocks.”
“You got it.” I found a space and carefully pulled into it, then turned in my seat to face her and pushed my sunglasses to the top of my head. “Before we go anywhere, are you going to tell me what’s bothering y
ou?”
“Why?” She sighed and dropped her head back, letting it loll to the side to watch me as she pulled her own sunglasses off. “It’s not a big deal.”
“Whenever somebody says something isn’t a big deal, it’s usually because it is a big deal.”
“I thought you didn’t want a relationship. This sounds a whole lot like relationship talk.”
“I thought we’d agreed to keep sleeping together for the time being. That may not constitute being in a romantic relationship, but it does mean we have some kind of relationship with one another. Even if it doesn’t mean we’re a couple.” I lifted my hand to her cheek. “As always, you can tell me to fuck off. If this is really about work, then fine. You don’t have to talk to me about it, but I can’t sleep with someone who has so much trouble looking me in the eye all of a sudden.”
“Well, I can’t sleep with someone if he’s the one getting married.” Her eyes blew wide open. She sucked both of her lips into her mouth, like she hadn’t meant to say that and was trying to seal her mouth against saying anything else.
I lifted my eyebrows and lowered my chin, keeping my gaze on hers. “I thought we’d established I’m not the one getting married.”
“Yeah, we did,” she said, her voice so low I could barely hear her. “But I told you about my ex and what happened. It just occurred to me that you said it wasn’t you getting married, but I still don’t know who it is.”
“I’m not your ex, Luna. If I wanted to sleep with a woman behind my wife’s back, she wouldn’t be called my wife.” I wedged my hand into the pocket of my jeans and extracted my phone. “Here. Let me prove it to you.”
I unlocked the device and clicked into a social media app I didn’t use often but Peter loved. He’d signed me up for it because apparently everyone under the age of eighty had a profile on it these days.
“This is Peter, my brother.” I turned the screen toward Luna and scrolled through his photos. “That woman with him is Jenny, his fiancée. They’re the people getting married. Take the phone, scroll through his profile. There are photos of their engagement and I’m pretty sure I got an email saying he tagged me in something where he thanked me for agreeing to help.”
Say You Do Page 10
