by Dez Burke
Yes, thought Nick bleakly, but for how long? Until her memory returned and she realized what a complete jerk he’d been on his wedding day? Just thinking about how hurt she’d been – hurt enough to up and leave him that first time – made Nick wary that she might still hold a grudge once she remembered what he’d done. No woman would like to feel like some mere object, or that her feelings didn’t count. But Nick could only hope that Kaycie would understand, and see that he’d changed. And that he’d absolutely fall apart if she ever decided to leave him again.
HOURS BEFORE, KAYCIE was ringing the doorbell to the house where Trisha lived with Mark and his aunt.
Kaycie recalled promising herself after the party that she’d never set foot on these grounds again. But ever since her conversation with Natasha all those days ago, Kaycie knew that she just had to see Trisha and maybe some of those missing pieces could start to make sense.
Kaycie hated herself for what she was doing. She shouldn’t have come here. She’d assured Nick so many times that it didn’t matter. Her memory would return in due course. And if not, then whatever. Her life was perfect now, why worry about a closed chapter when a new one was already being written? She had a wonderful marriage to a gorgeous, sexy and adoring man. Her career was at its heights, and she had nothing holding her back from true happiness.
Well, except for the niggling sensation she kept having every waking moment. She couldn’t keep her mind on work, and at night when Nick lay asleep next to her, she couldn’t shake off the flashing images that somehow, made her flinch as they tried to pierce through.
So she swallowed any notion of dread and waited on that doorstep, not sure who was going to show up. If it was Mark, well she had nothing to say to him, or his snobbish aunt. As for Trisha, Kaycie just wanted them to talk. She just hoped the other girl wouldn’t be in one of those snarky moods of hers...
Moments later the door flew open and Kaycie found herself looking into the narrowed, spiteful gaze that met hers. And in that moment, Kaycie knew. Like she’d just been smacked in the face, it hit her. Everything came flooding back in a rush of sights and sounds.
Dazed, Kaycie staggered back.
“Kaycie?” Trisha said, her stony expression turning alarmed.
Kaycie shook off the weakening feeling that wanted to overtake her. She grabbed the door ledge for support, and looked hard at Trisha. “I remember everything now. About how you tried to poison my mind against Nick – you spiteful witch.”
Trisha was staring at her. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“You can quit pretending,” Kaycie bit out. “It was you who came to me with some bullshit about Nick and his stepmother, so I followed them and caught them.”
Kaycie found she couldn’t continue, not with the horrible images swimming before her eyes.
“You caught them,” Trisha sneered. “Caught them doing what? Is that why you’re here, to pick someone to blame for your husband’s indiscretions? Girl, you’re tripping. Look, it ain’t my fault if your man’s a player. I only laid out the facts as I knew them; just so you wouldn’t go thinking Nick was marrying you for any romantic reasons.”
“You’re a liar! Nick loves me,” Kaycie cried out, as if to reassure herself. “And I love him.”
“Just like you loved Mark?” mocked Trisha. “When Mark came to me, broken up about how you turned him down, I wanted to kill you. Who the hell did you think you were, turning down a good man like that after he kept himself all those years to get back to you? I hated you for the shoddy way you treated him just so you could marry your fancy billionaire. When I found out it was Nick Vitale you were hooking up with, I saw a chance of bursting your bubble, especially since I was sure you didn’t know about him and his dad’s trophy wife. So what happened? You caught them both red-handed, huh, and at your own wedding for that matter. That must have sucked! What a perfect revenge.”
Trisha eyed Kaycie, her smile derisive. “Now you know how it is to be on the sideline. But if you’re here to blame me for the collapse of your marriage, then...”
“My marriage hasn’t collapsed!” Yet, Kaycie added silently. “And I only came because I needed to find out what it was we discussed at the reception. Because crazy as it may sound, I had a recent accident which made me lose part of my memory, especially to do with what happened at the wedding reception. But now, seeing you, it all came back in a flash. I’m sure you must have heard of my disappearance.”
“Yeah, I heard. I wasn’t surprised,” Trisha said scornfully. “Nick and his people tried to act like it was something planned, but I could read between the lines. I knew you’d upped and run for some reason. And I thought, how typical of you. I guess hurting people is your stock in trade.”
“Oh? I thought it was yours,” Kaycie retorted. “Let me clear the air about one thing at least. About Mark; if you must know, I really liked him. Loved him even. But not in the way he wanted. And now, all I can do is pity him if it’s someone like you he ever ends up saddled with.”
“Save your pity for yourself,” Trisha spat, but Kaycie was already turning and walking back down to where her car was parked, legs shaky but heart feeling strangely light. Now all she had to worry about was the next move to take.
KAYCIE STEPPED OUT of the elevator and unto Nick’s floor, where his secretary Brenda was working on her computer.
“Hello, is Nick in?” Kaycie asked and to her surprise, the bespectacled brunette looked up with a guilty start.
“Mrs. Vitale! Ah, yes...he’s in but he’s um...”
As the secretary blubbered on, Kaycie became suspicious. She’d only ever shown up at Nick’s office twice; both times on his invitation to meet for lunch. Those visits had been planned – this was not. But what could be making Brenda’s face flush so deeply?
Without another word, Kaycie walked to the door of Nick’s office, ignoring the secretary’s, “Mrs. Vitale, please...”
INSIDE, NICK WAS TRYING to get Lena to leave. He was done talking.
“Get out,” he said in a quietly menacing voice. “Get the hell out of here; out of my life. You’ve had your fun.”
Lena’s eyes sparked defiance. “You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” And then her expression softened to genuine hurt. “We’re family, Nick. And we’re supposed to stick together. I’m sorry if I caused you pain. I’m willing to make it up to you. Anything you want.”
She moved closer to him, resting her hands on his suited shoulders.
Nick had reached beyond the limits of his self-control. At that moment he could gladly wring Len’s neck, but instead settled for grabbing hold of her arms. Fuck security. He was looking forward to throwing her out himself.
“Nick,” Lena said, aghast. He could tell she was surprised by his uncharacteristic lack of cool. He’d never, ever laid hands on a woman the way he wanted to do to Lena right then. She’d manipulated his life far too long. He could feel her fingers clutch tightly to his lapels, as if intent to forestall the embarrassment of being flung out of his office. Too late, Nick fumed, readying to do just that.
Just then, the door sprang open.
Kaycie stood there, looking on the scene with widened eyes. Nick cursed beneath his breath as he met her shocked gaze. He could only imagine how this must look. Dios! Him and Lena, caught tightly in each other’s arms. Great, just great. Fate was intent on raining shit on him.
But before he could explain to the frozen Kaycie, she turned from them with a sob and stumbled quickly back, heading straight for the elevator.
Nick shoved the clinging Lena abruptly from him, and went right after Kaycie, who’d just sped past his wide-eyed secretary. Nick saw Kaycie enter the elevator doors which already started to close after her just as he reached them.
“Kaycie, wait!” Nick said, just as the twin doors slid to a close. On an oath, he made for the stairs, intent on one thing: getting her to listen to his explanation.
“Dammit, Kaycie, stop!” he said under his breath when, on reach
ing the ground floor parking lot, he saw her already driving off. There was no way he could go after her now, not with his own car in his private garage.
“Great!” he let out in frustration. He could just imagine what she must have concluded with him locked in another woman’s grip, but...
He stopped short as he recalled the expression on Kaycie’s face as she’d stood there.
Maybe he was just being fanciful...but it sure seemed as if she’d known. Remembered everything. Her eyes had held the look that said she’d seen this before.
The thought made him go crazy.
It was bad enough being caught in a compromising situation with another woman, but did Kaycie recognize Lena from the wedding reception? Was that it? Could that be the reason for the look of betrayal on her face, like he’d let her down somehow? Again?
Fuck! Nick smashed his fist into the nearby concrete wall, not even flinching at the pain. He would have to find her, he swore. And prayed it wasn’t too late to set the records straight.
THE EVENING GLOOM HAD long settled by the time Kaycie pulled to a stop in front of their home.
Drawing deep breaths, she let herself in quietly. She knew Nick had to be in; she’d seen his car in the driveway. Her chest thumped as she moved towards his study, the only room which was lit in the whole dim, silent house.
The light flooding from the study’s open doorway fell on the darkened corridor as she advanced with noiseless steps.
She found Nick seated at his desk, head buried in his folded arms. The dejected picture he made cut her straight to the chest. He hadn’t noticed her presence, and she couldn’t stop the soft call that spilled from her lips in the hope of catching his attention before she came any closer.
“Nick...”
His head shot up at the sound of her voice and she drew in air at the pain mirrored in his eyes – soon replaced by one of relief at the sight of her.
“Kaycie...Dios. I was so worried you’d run off again,” he rasped, up on his feet and then closing the space between them before she could even blink. Kaycie was engulfed in his warm embrace as he squeezed her tight.
“I’m sorry if I worried you,” she said quietly. “I just needed time to think things over.”
Nick drew back, holding her at arm’s length and quelling her to meet his gaze. “Before you say anymore, you need to know this: I love you. More than I ever thought it possible to love anyone in my life. Forget what you saw or heard that day in the garden at the reception.”
Kaycie stared up at him, stiffening. “How did you know I’ve got my memory back?”
“You still don’t understand it, do you, how attuned I’ve become to your emotions, your expressions?” Nick asked with a gentle smile, combing his fingers through her loose, tousled locks. “I sensed something was different; the way you looked when you stood there earlier today.” He shook his head with a grimace. “Part of me is happy that you’re okay now, but if it’s going to change the way you feel about me.”
At his words, she pulled out of his hold, feeling his reluctance to let her go even as she slipped away to stand by the window, looking out.
“So, how did it happen? How did you remember everything?” he asked with a weary sigh.
Kaycie shrugged, hugging her arms to herself. “Nothing fantastic, I’m afraid. I simply took one look at Trisha and suddenly, it just...clicked.”
“Trisha?”
Kaycie turned to view Nick’s confused frown. “Mark’s cousin – well, adopted cousin. You might have heard that Marilyn Tucker, Mark’s aunt, has an adopted daughter. Well, like you once did, she believed I’d treated Mark unfairly. Anyway, she was the one who fed me stories about your one time involvement with your stepmother.”
And quelling her inner distaste for the topic, Kaycie related everything Trisha had told her, and how she’d followed him and his stepmother and found them alone together.
“It wasn’t just the things you said,” Kaycie said, shoulders hunched as her arms tightened around her shivering frame. “But the way you said them. Like I was nothing to you. Like I didn’t matter at all. Back then, I was stupid enough to think I could love you for both of us. I’d begun to nurse feelings for you despite the fact that you’d blackmailed me into being your wife for a year. I kept telling myself I could make you care. But that day I realized that I couldn’t bear the thought that you married me but loved someone else.”
“Oh God, Kaycie,” Nick groaned, stepping forward as if to come to her, but she backed away, and this made him pause as he flinched.
Sighing raggedly, he pushed fingers back through his ruffled hair. “It’s true that when I was younger, I believed myself infatuated with Lena. We lived in the same house, saw each other every day. She was married to my father but was closer to me in age and I was at that point in my life that I really hated my father and didn’t care about going against him. I was so sure Lena felt the same for me but she was much too good at withholding her feelings. I told her to run off with me but she bluntly refused, claiming not to want to come between my father and me. Devastated, I left home, determined to make it on my own. But a few years ago my father reached out to me, saying he was ill and didn’t have much time. I never knew if he’d guessed what had almost happened between Lena and me, and frankly I didn’t care because my feelings for her had long died. I was ready to put it all behind me if my father would. We were never close, him and I, but we grew to have a grudging respect for each other and when he died, I did feel the loss very strongly for a man who never tried to know his son like a father should.”
Nick turned away for a moment, shoulders rigid. “One thing I never did put behind me though, was Lena’s rejection. It made me cynical about love and about women. I always believed she’d stayed with my father because of his money and power, and wasn’t going to give that up for any short-lived passion she said was all we’d ever have. Anyway, I had no wish to ever fall in love; romance or a woman’s affection meant nothing to me. That’s why Rachel suited me just fine. She didn’t pretend to love me. We had an understanding; we knew the score. She didn’t care that I could never give her the true intimate passion a man can provide a woman he truly cares for.”
He moved forward once more, and this time didn’t stop until he was right before her. Kaycie edged back against the wall, though her eyes were mesmerized by the dark flames swelling in his gaze.
“That’s why I was such a jerk to you at that party when I overheard you turning Mark down. It was like watching a re-hash of what had happened between me and Lena. To me you were just like those opportunistic females always holding out for something better. Dumb, isn’t it? What made it worse was how attracted I’d been with you from day one. I was so torn that I couldn’t stop myself from sticking my neck in. But I’m glad I did because it gave me the excuse I needed to get close to you.”
He cupped her face, his hold firm so that she had no choice but to look up into his smoldering gaze. “And the things I said to Lena in that garden...the stuff you must have overhead...Cara, that was just big talk, don’t you see? My feelings for you were still too raw to confess to anyone, and certainly not to my stepmother. I didn’t want to risk her laughing in my face for being such a softie. But it was that stupid pride of mine that sent you away from me. When I said those things, I didn’t mean them and I certainly didn’t mean for you to hear me say them.”
He rubbed his thumbs against her cheeks, his eyes soft with a stirring plea. “You believe me, don’t you? Please tell me you believe me.”
Kaycie’s gaze fell. “I don’t know what to believe. It all sounded so real. I felt empty and used. I kept thinking how I never really felt good enough. That you picked me just because I was gullible and easily bent to your will. I just felt...I wanted to die. And when you kissed her.”
Nick let out a dismayed sound. “Kaycie, she kissed me. And short of throwing her off me, I tried to endure it. If you’d waited long enough, you’d have seen me wrench myself away from her. Afterwards s
he called the kiss a ‘congratulatory gesture’ now that my marriage had earned me my ‘fortune’. Little had I known she’d set up the whole display for your benefit. And when I got back to the reception and you were nowhere to be found, I almost went berserk. I couldn’t believe you could just get up and leave without a word.”
“It was childish of me, I know,” Kaycie breathed, her gaze sinking low. “I guess I’d always been an escapist; preferring to run and hide than stay and fight. But I wish I had stayed. I wish I’d given you the chance to explain. And now...”
“And now what?” he asked, and Kaycie could tell he was striving to keep the anxiety from his tone.
“And now I know you do love me,” Kaycie said at last, gazing up into his eyes at last. “Maybe not at first, but I guess you let yourself grow into the idea that maybe you do care for me after all.”
She smiled impishly, and Nick suddenly hugged her in relief, his grip so hard it made her squeal. “Care for you? You are la vita mia, Kaycie. My life. I knew the potential of what we could share. That’s why I made you think we needed to be married for a year, which wasn’t true. All I required was the marriage certificate to make it valid. But I needed an excuse to make sure you stayed as long as it took until we could discover how deep this could go between us. Now to keep you I’d give up everything, even the stupid billions that got us together.”
“I wouldn’t call the Vitale fortune ‘stupid billions’,” Kaycie murmured teasingly. “At least, it made you desperate enough to marry someone like me.”
Her eyes twinkled up at him, referring to that first night they’d clashed on the balcony and he’d told her exactly what he’d thought of any man falling for ‘someone like her’.
