Sasha, sensing that something was wrong, put her soft hand on my back.
“Andy, what is it?” Sasha asked. “What’s wrong?”
I groaned and put my face in my hands, shaking my head.
“Fuck,” I muttered, exhaling sharply.
“Andy,” Sasha said again. She sat up in bed next to me and put an arm around my back. “What’s wrong? What is it?”
I took a deep breath and turned to her. With her beautiful red curls mussed and the sheet covering her massive tits, she looked so innocent and sweet that I wanted nothing more than to pull her into my arms, kiss her forehead, and tell her that everything was perfect.
But everything wasn’t perfect.
I’d just done something so horribly wrong, so tremendously unprofessional, that I could barely stand the sight of my lover.
“We shouldn’t be doing this,” I told her flatly.
Sasha’s hand stiffened, but she didn’t take it away. Not wanting to push away her touch, I climbed out of her bed and began pulling my clothes on.
“Andy,” Sasha said. “Come on, talk to me – don’t just leave.”
I ignored her. I pulled on my trousers and belt, then reached for my wrinkled shirt and tugged it over my still-sweaty abdomen.
“Sasha,” I said slowly, turning to her when I was dressed. She was still naked under the sheets and she pulled them higher, as if to hide that body I found so alluring.
“What?”
I swallowed hard. My heart was pounding and my hands felt like I’d just stuck them in ice water.
“Look,” I told her. “I’m your boss, remember? We could both lose our jobs. And it could be much worse for me – I could be sued, for sexual harassment.”
Sasha laughed briefly. “That’s insane,” she said. “There’s no way I’d ever think reporting you.” With a playful glint in her blue eyes, she flopped down on the bed, bare ass in the air. “Unless you want to pretend, Mr. Greene,” she added in a sultry voice.
I sighed. The fact that Sasha was so intrinsically playful, so whimsical, so adorable, just made all of this harder.
Sasha’s smile faded. “What,” she said. “Andy, I was kidding. You know I’d never do anything to get you in trouble, right?”
“It’s not about what you could, or would, do,” I said slowly, feeling my stomach turn to ice inside my body. “It’s about professional boundaries, and the fact that I just crossed them with you.”
Sasha pressed her pink, pouty lips together.
“We need to find a way to work together without giving into the chemistry between us,” I told her.
The playful spark in Sasha’s eyes disappeared, replaced by a look of hurt that made me want to vomit. I hated doing this – I really liked her, and I wanted to keep seeing her. But I’d worked so hard to get where I was in the company, and Sasha had just started. Her first real job ... I couldn’t fuck that up for her, couldn’t take that away.
I had to be firm, and make sure this never happened again.
Sasha thought hard for a moment, poking the tip of her tongue from between her lips. The sight, coupled with the sight of her bare ass in the air, was almost enough to arouse me again and I forced myself to think about spreadsheets, documents, anything that wasn’t even remotely sexy.
“Hey,” Sasha said. “What if I transferred, you know, to another department? That would help. I wouldn’t be your employee anymore. I mean, we couldn’t exactly flaunt it, but it wouldn’t be against the rules for us to be seeing each other.”
I frowned. I knew that as far as solutions went, it wasn’t a bad one.
And yet, I didn’t like it. The thought of Sasha being away from my watchful eye just made me feel worse, like she was giving up something good just for me.
And that fucker, Zach, I thought. I hated the idea of someone like Zach supervising Sasha. After that dig he’d made the other day about stealing her for his team, I knew that he had his eye on her.
“No,” I told her firmly, shaking my head. “That’s not a good idea, and it’s not going to work.”
It was selfish of me, maybe – refusing to let Sasha go even though I couldn’t have her the way I wanted her.
“Why not?” Sasha frowned. “It seems like a perfect idea to me.”
“We don’t need to do anything so drastic,” I told her. “We just need to limit our interactions to the workplace, and remain mindful of the rules.”
Sasha blinked at me, and I got the sense that she was really and truly upset. It killed me, it really did, but it was for the best.
“I’m going to go,” I told her. “See you at work.”
Sasha didn’t move. Her lower lip was quivering and for a moment, I was horribly afraid that she would start to cry. I forced myself to tear my eyes from hers and leave the room, leave the apartment, leave her deliciously curvy naked body in the bed that was still warm from our lovemaking.
Fucking hell, this was rough.
In the car, on the way home, I kept catching traces of Sasha’s intoxicating scent on my skin and it made my cock throb with lust and regret. She was driving me crazy and the worst part was, she wasn’t even trying. She was just being herself: her wonderfully quirky, adorable self.
God, how on earth was I going to refrain from giving into temptation again?
12
Sasha – Saturday
The next day, I woke up with a killer headache and a terrible feeling in my gut. At first, I thought it was from all the red wine that I’d drank. But then the night before came crashing back to me. Andy, powerful and sexy, in my bed. Taking me, making me his, making me come harder than I’d ever come before.
My sheets still smelled like his woodsy, musky cologne and my heart ached as I buried my face in the pillow and took a deep whiff of his scent.
I covered my face with my hands and tried to block out my unhappy thoughts: the memory of Andy’s words, and his proclamation that we needed to stay away from each other except for professional interactions. I didn’t get it – the chemistry between us was undeniably explosive and powerful. Andy clearly wanted me. Every time he looked at me with those intense hazel eyes, I could tell.
And yet, when I’d suggested a transfer to another department, he’d immediately shot the idea down. It had been a good idea, it would have been the perfect solution to our problems. I didn’t understand why he didn’t seem to think so, too. Even though I was new to the workforce beyond temping, I wasn’t that naïve: I knew that people in offices hooked up and dated all the time. After all, it was only natural when you spent so much time together with coworkers that eventually, you’d find those who you liked and wanted to date.
Did Andy think I wasn’t good at my job? Was he trying to protect me and keep me employed by keeping me in his department?
I didn’t know. It felt like I didn’t know anything as I rolled out of bed and clumsily got in the shower. I hated washing the last traces of Andy off my body, but if I was going to behave and play by the rules and be good, this was the first step.
Besides, my head was killing me. I felt like I’d drank a litre of wine all by myself ... and to be honest, that probably wasn’t far from the truth. When I got out of the shower, I toweled off, put on my favorite yoga pants and hoodie, and wrapped my wet hair in a towel before sitting down at my computer and opening Skype.
Thankfully, Darla answered on the first call. She appeared on my screen, grainy and small, but beaming at the sight of me.
“Hey, you,” Darla chirped. “What’s up?”
I sighed. “I hooked up with Andy again. Last night. He came over to my apartment after this work happy hour thing.”
Darla gasped. “Sasha, you didn’t,” she said, shaking her head. “He’s your boss now!”
I bit my lip. “I know, Mom,” I said drily. “Save the punishment, okay? I couldn’t help it.” I took a deep breath and looked away. “It was like, I was a little tipsy and he was there and he was so cute and we went on a walk to see this fountain and i
t was so romantic that I couldn’t help myself.”
When I looked at the screen, Darla was smiling at me with her eyebrow raised.
“What?” I asked. “What now?”
Darla flushed. “Nothing,” she said. “It’s just, um, you’re like addicted to him, or something,” she said. “You think I’m kidding, but that can totally happen. I read somewhere that people get addicted to each other’s pheromones, or whatever.”
“Sounds like a fun read,” I cracked.
“I’m being serious!” Darla said.
“I know,” I told her. “I’m just afraid that it’s true, that’s all. Whenever he’s around, I just can’t keep my hands to myself. We have such a strong connection. And the worst thing is, he doesn’t even deny it! He just says that we have to find a way to ignore it!”
“What’s the worst that could happen, honestly?” Darla asked.
“We could lose our jobs, duh,” I replied. “And he told me that he could even get hit with some kind of sexual harassment charge, which is totally unfair.”
Back in Ames, Darla shrugged. “It isn’t like there aren’t other jobs out there,” she countered. “You both could find other work. Or one of you, anyway.”
I didn’t reply.
“I mean, what if this is really the start of something huge?” Darla asked. “Like, something really big, between the two of you? Sometimes, sex spirals into something else.”
I didn’t know what to say. For all of my attraction to Andy and my enjoyment from our encounters, I hadn’t really even thought about anything else. I knew that I really liked Andy, and that I didn’t want to stop seeing him. But I didn’t know how far I was really willing to go when it came down to hard facts. Was I willing to lose my job, or watch him get fired because we’d hooked up a few times?
“I don’t know,” I said finally. “I mean, I like him. I know that I really like him. But I don’t know how he feels – for all I know, this could just be sex for him.”
“He’s clearly into you,” Darla said. She made a squeamish face. “And as much as I hate talking about my cousin like this, Andy isn’t the kind of guy who’s just into casual sex. It’s not his prerogative. He’s too serious. He always has been.”
I swallowed hard.
“I mean, we clearly have great chemistry, and great sex,” I said.
Darla winced and I apologized.
“Sorry,” I added quickly. “It’s just, what if it isn’t more than that? What if it doesn’t go further than that? What if we both have to find new jobs only to realize that we’re a terrible couple?”
Darla shrugged. “Look,” she said. “I’m not an oracle, or anything.” She paused and a dreamy look came over her face. “But I do know that love is the most wonderful thing on earth, and you shouldn’t let something as little as a job hold you back from experiencing it. Love is like, the most amazing thing ever.”
I blinked at her. “Excuse me,” I said. “But who are you, and what have you done with Darla Howze?”
Darla flushed and giggled awkwardly. “I don’t know,” she said. “I think maybe I left her at the airport before I went on honeymoon.”
I raised an eyebrow. It was so hard to believe – Darla had always been so serious, so studious, so pragmatic that listening to her talk like this felt strange. I had always been the fanciful one, the one who said that life was nothing to be taken seriously.
“You’re going off the deep end,” I told her with a smirk. “With all that love talk.”
“I’m sorry,” Darla said. She took a deep breath. “I just think that now that I’m married, a lot of stuff has come into perspective for me, you know? Like, work is important because we all need money to live, and stuff. But relationships are way more important than that.”
I smiled. Her words, although slightly awkward, were touching.
“I miss you so much,” I said. “Come visit soon?”
Darla laughed. “I hope so,” she said. “I miss you, too.”
Later that afternoon I was lying on the couch, watching trashy TV and trying to forget all about the conversation that I’d had with Andy before he’d left the night before when my phone buzzed. I scrambled to get it, sitting up and squawking in the hopes that it was from the man himself.
To my surprise, it was from Billie.
“Hey, kid,” she’d texted. “You get home okay last night?”
I blushed, then called her.
“Hey,” she said. “What’s up?”
“I’m fine,” I told her. “Just a little hungover.”
Billie snickered. “Red wine does that to a lady,” she replied. “You want to come and meet me at West Side Market?”
“I don’t know,” I said, glancing down at my yoga pants and bare feet. “What’s that?”
Billie laughed. “It’s cool,” she said. “it’s an indoor market with all these different stalls. Lots of good food, especially for hangovers,” she teased.
“That does sound nice,” I admitted. “I’ll meet you there in an hour?”
“Cool,” Billie said.
We hung up and I reluctantly got up from my blanket nest and went into my bedroom. It was a crisp fall day with only a touch of humidity in the air, and I pulled on my favorite leggings and a loose sweater. After tucking my hair into a messy bun, I made a face at myself in the mirror and left for downtown. If it had been almost anyone other than Billie, I probably would have said no. But I really liked her – I was hoping that soon, we could become real friends, not just work friends. I wasn’t trying to replace Dar or anything, but I missed having a close friend nearby who I could really talk to, not just shoot the shit with.
I met Billie at the entrance to the market and couldn’t help doing a double-take as I looked around.
“You weren’t kidding,” I said. “This place is really cool.”
Billie nodded definitively. “For sure,” she said. “Cleveland is actually a pretty awesome city. Are you into beer? We have a lot of great breweries,” she added.
I shrugged. “It’s okay,” I said, inwardly wincing at the mention of alcohol.
Billie must have seen the look on my face because she giggled. “Oh, sorry,” she said. “No booze talk today, I promise.”
We walked through the market and I stopped at a stall that was selling all kinds of pastries and baked goods. I bought a ham and cheese croissant and bit into it thoughtfully as Billie and I walked from one end to the other.
“So, it seems like Andy likes you,” Billie said, as soon as I’d taken a giant mouthful of croissant. Blushing, I chewed and swallowed quickly.
“That’s so crazy that you’re both from that same town in Idaho,” Billie said.
“Iowa,” I corrected her quickly.
Billie smirked at me and I realized that she had been messing with me on purpose. We both burst into laughter.
“So, how did you find that out, anyway?” Billie asked me when our laughter had died down. “Did he ask or something? See it on your resume?”
I shook my head. “Uh, no, not really,” I said. “We actually met right before I moved out here. At my best friend’s wedding – Andy is her older cousin.”
“Wow,” Billie said. “I bet that was a surprise.”
I nodded. “Trust me, it definitely was when we first saw each other,” I told her.
Billie cleared her throat. “And how was the wedding? Fun?”
I looked down at my feet as I took another huge bite of my croissant.
“Oh, yeah,” I said. “It was great. Darla and I have been friends forever – since we were little kids, almost. And she married her high-school sweetheart.”
Billie raised an eyebrow. “I bet he looked good in a suit,” she commented.
“Who, Greg? Yeah, he’s cute – he’s not my type, really, but he makes Darla really happy.”
“Andy,” Billie said with a smirk. “Not Gary, or whoever.”
“Oh, um, yeah. Well, of course. He’s really handsome,” I babbled.
“Look,” I told her quickly. “I ... yeah, okay. We hooked up that night. That’s why it was such a surprise to see him here, to realize that I was his new employee.”
“I knew it!” Billie crowed. She laughed and patted my arm. “It’s like I have a sixth sense about these things ... or maybe it’s just the crazy pheromones flowing between the two of you, because wow. You guys practically set that pub on fire last night. He’s so into you,” she declared. “I’ve never seen him like that with anyone before, and we’ve worked together for a few years.”
I flushed hotly. “Please, please don’t tell anyone,” I begged her. “We could both lose our jobs, and Andy would be so upset with me if he found out that someone else knew.”
Billie mimed zipping her lips and tossing an imaginary key over her shoulder.
“Of course,” she said. “It’s totally between us – I’d never spill. I have your back,” she said. “I know we don’t know each other that well yet, but you can trust me.”
I smiled in relief, although I was still worried that someone else would find out. If Andy and I were truly as obvious as Billie had said, how long would it be before someone else discovered the real truth that lay between us?
“Look, for what it’s worth, I think you’re good for him,” Billie said. “He’s always so uptight and serious, and you’re so fun and laid-back. You probably keep him centered, or whatever. He really needs to loosen up.”
“It doesn’t matter,” I told her. “He’s my boss, remember? There’s no way that we could actually date.”
Billie shrugged, then winked at me. “Look, I’m not telling you what to do,” she said. “But the heart wants what it wants. You can’t change that, can you?”
No, I thought as my stomach twisted nervously. You sure as hell can’t.
13
Andy – Monday, one week later
“Andy? Got a minute?”
I looked up from my computer and saw Amanda, my boss, standing in the doorway to my office with a smile on her painted lips.
One Night Boyfriend (Be My Boyfriend Book 3) Page 9
