by BobA. Troutt
*****
Dead Limbs and Leaves
One Night Stand
A steady rain fell slowly over the small town of Flat Rock, Arkansas. I watched it bead up on the window where I was sitting on the bus. It had been a long time since I had been home. There were a lot of memories here. As we drove through town, I looked at all the stores. A few I remember when I was here. I saw the five and dime, Newberry’s, Ben Franklins, and the Dollar Store. Some stores were new. I had never heard of them. We pulled into the bus station, as I looked out the window once more. The rain had let up. I slowly made my way off the bus as I took a deep breath of fresh air. The trip from Mississippi had been long and tiring. A cup of coffee would be good, I thought to myself. I remembered there used to be a small coffee shop not far from the station. As I turned to look across the street, I could see the sign ‘Pedigo’s Coffee Shop.’ I grabbed my suitcase and headed across the street. As I made my way around, dodging the traffic trying not to get hit, I couldn’t help to smell the exhaust fumes from the passing bus as it came by. When I finally reached the other side, I paused for a moment to catch my breath. I took out my inhaler and took a couple of short shots. I took a second look around once more and said to myself, the town had really changed a lot.
The last time I was here was in 1959. There were only a few buildings and crossroads. The clackety clack of the train still echoed as its whistle is long behind the stir of the caboose’s wind. It used to bring soldiers through headed to Louisiana going off to war. I made my way into the coffee shop, took a cup, and sat at a table near the window. The rain had finally quit and the sun was beginning to shine again. The coffee was better than I remembered. As I blew my cup of coffee and tried to take a sip, I thought back of what the doctor told me a couple of months back. He was treating me for lung cancer. The doctor told me I didn’t have but a few months to live. I am now at Flat Rock where I was born and raised to try and find peace of something from my past. A lot of water has gone under the bridge since then. I pondered the thought of calling her several times but it seemed like I couldn’t. Would she come and meet me after all this time? As I weighed by objections and sipped on a little more coffee, I sat back in my chair and rested my head on my hands would she ever forgive me, I thought. After a few moment of silence, I rose to my feet, turned up my last sip of coffee, and headed out the door.
I looked from side to side looking for a phone to make the call and noticed a booth just up the street. Slowly, I thumbed through the phone book until I found her number. I hesitated a moment. I rolled the coin over and over between my fingers trying to decide. I thought about what I was going to do. If she said no – but what about yes, I didn’t even know if she wanted to talk to me. It had been so long ago. I then dropped the coin on the ground and bent down to pick it up, then I inserted it in the slot on the phone and began to dial. Patiently, I waited. The phone rang as a gentle wind blew my snow white hair across my wrinkled brow.
“Hello.”
For a moment I didn’t say a word, my mind went blank.
“Hello,” said the voice again as my hands tremble and my voice cracked.
“Rebecca, is that you?” I asked.
“Yes, yes, it is,” she replied.
“It’s Charlie, your dad,” I said.
“Daddy,” she cried. “Daddy, is that you? Oh, my God.”
We talked and talked. There was so much to say, so many questions.
“Is your mother there?” I asked.
“Yes, she is. She’s asleep,” replied Becky.
“Do you think she’ll see me?” I asked.
“I don’t know daddy,” she replied. “I’ll try.”
“Meet me at the coffee shop,” I said, “next to the bus station.”
“I’ll bring her, Daddy,” she replied, “if I can get her out of this house.”
“Okay, girl,” I said. “I love you.”
“I love you too, daddy,” she cried.
Click went the phone as I turned from the phone booth. I headed back to the coffee shop. It had been about ten years since I had seen Rebecca. As I nervously waited, I ran my fingers though my hair and quickly catching my breath. I then sat down at the same table and ordered a fresh cup. The sunlight was shining through the window, revealing a light haze over the glass. I didn’t know if I should tell them about the cancer or not. I wasn’t sure about anything right at that moment. About an hour later as I was staring out the window, a car pulled up in front of the shop it was them. I saw Becky getting out on the driver’s side and Nell, my ex-wife, getting out on the passenger’s side. The shade of the other buildings kept her from seeing in. I stood by the table and hugged them both as they came in.
My eyes quickly filled with tears as I looked at them. They were so beautiful. It had seemed so long ago. Nell was as beautiful as the day I had met her, and Rebecca was her spitting image.
“Nell do you want some coffee?” I asked. “It’s the best in town.”
“It’s still early,” she said. “Why not, maybe it won’t keep me awake tonight. Charlie, let me look at you,” Nell said.
Then she reached up and patted him on his face, “It’s been a long time,” she said, “too long.” With a quiver in her voice and tears in her eyes, “I’ve missed you so much.”
“I missed you too, Mrs. Nell,” I replied. Then I turned to my daughter, “Becky, you have grown into a beautiful woman. You always did have your mother’s eyes.”
“Why thank you, Daddy. I love you,” she replied. “I’ve missed you so.”
We had a lot to talk about. There were so many unanswered questions. We spent the next couple of hours laughing awhile and then we cried. It was the best time we’d had in years.
“Daddy,” spoke up Becky. “I’m going to run over to the mall to get something. I’ll be back shortly,” then she winked at me.
“Okay, Becky, I’ll be here,” I replied.
“Bye,” she shouted.
“Well, she’s all grown up,” I said, “seems like overnight and Nell, you’re still the prettiest woman in Flat Rock.”
“Oh, hush, Charlie,” she replied as she picked at her hair and pulled on her dress.
“I started to call several times,” I stated, “but somehow I didn’t see the use.”
“Are you still living in Kemp?” she replied.
“Yes I am,” I answered taking a sip of coffee.
“Why didn’t you ever remarry?” she asked.
“I never could get over you,” I answered.
Nell sort of grinned and turned her head.
“What about you?” I asked. “Did you?”
“Why, no,” she replied. “I couldn’t find anybody else who could put up with me like you did then,” she laughed. “You ought to know me better than that, Charlie.”
Slowly, I eased my hand over and took hers. With my other hand I gently patted hers and whispered, “I’ve missed you.”
“You didn’t have to leave,” she stated. “We could have worked things out.”
“It’s been 32 years,” I said. “I can’t let it go.”
Then I eased the toe of my shoe over to her leg and lightly moved it up and down.
“You remember that?” I asked.
Quickly, she jerked her leg back and twisted around in her seat.
“Charlie, you still got that spark,” she replied. “You always did.”
I leaned over and whispered in her ear, “I’ve really missed you.”
Nervously, she began to pick her hair, chattering a mile a minute.
“Slow down, Nell,” he cried.
Then we both started laughing.
“You still have your moves,” she replied. “But seriously, Charlie, what happened to us? Was it me?”
“No,” I responded. “It was several things.”
“The main thing,” she asked, “was it over that one night stand? Charlie you n
ever did get over it. After all this time can you just let it go? I made a mistake. I’ve told you I was sorry a million times. I don’t know what else to say or do to make it right”
“That’s not all of it,” he replied.
“What else could it be?” she said. “You never could forgive me.”
“Now, Nell, don’t get all worked up,” I pleaded with her.
“The best I remember,” she said, “we had been broke up for about two weeks. I went to the bar and grill to get a drink and a bite to eat. While I was there your brother James Allen came in and started talking to me. He bought me a few drinks and we left.”
“I remember what happened,” I replied. “And I know what you have said. If you hadn’t let it slip when we were arguing, I would have never known. You were the one that told me about it and I’ve had to live with it ever since.”
“Do you think I haven’t,” she spoke up.
“Well, it is over,” I said. “It’s time to move on with our lives.”
“It will never be over with you,” she cried. “You’ll never forgive me.”
“Charlie, what do you want of me?”
“How was I to know I would get pregnant,” she cried.
“Becky has nothing to do with it,” I said. “I have always accepted her as my own.”
“I know that,” replied Nell. “Becky loves you Charlie. You’re the only daddy she has ever known. After we separated I didn’t know what she was going to do. She went to pieces. About two weeks after that, we went back together remember, Charlie. And by the next week we remarried. It was about a month later when I found out I was pregnant. Soon after, James Allen was killed in a car wreck.”
“All those years you kept the one night stand from me. When Becky was born I thought she was mine. I confronted you about it when you let it slip and you never denied being with James. That’s when I decided to move out.”
“That’s right, Charlie, I raised Becky by myself and I think I’ve done a darn good job.”
“I agree,” I said. “There’s no need to keep pouring salt into the wounds. I came to see if we could let go of it all and bury the ghost of the past.”
“But can you, Charlie,” she asked. “Can you let it go?”
“I’m willing to try,” I said for the first time. “What about you, Nell?”
“Sure,” she replied. “It shouldn’t have gone on this long anyway.”
“How about some more coffee and a piece of chess pie,” I asked.
“Sounds good,” she answered. “What now, Charlie? What are you going to do? Are you going to stay here?”
“No, I don’t guess so,” I replied. “I’ll be going back to Kemp. Maybe you and Becky can come and visit.”
“Maybe,” she said. “Or maybe you can visit us and we can go over to the old dance hall some Saturday night. Best I remember you were one of the best two-step dancers around.”
“Now, I don’t know about all that,” I said. “It has been awhile.”
About that time, in walked Rebecca.
“Hi, Dad, hi, Mom,” she said.
“Hi, Becky,” we replied.
“What’s going on,” she said. “Daddy are you coming home with us?”
Silence filled the room. I didn’t know what to say.
Nell interrupted, “Becky, your dad has to go back to Kemp to work on some things and when he gets them taken care of he’ll be back.”
“You won’t be too long will you, dad? We still have a lot to talk about.”
“It won’t’ be long, Becky,” I encouraged. “What time do you have, Nell?”
“It is five till four,” she replied. “Where on earth has the time gone?”
“What time is the bus?” asked Becky.
“Four o’clock,” replied Charlie. “I guess that’s it now pulling up.”
It wasn’t long until Becky returned. It was time to go. Becky seemed so happy. They walked me to the bus arm and arm as a family once more and for the last time. We hugged, shared kisses, and said our goodbyes. Shortly, the bus pulled off as tears ran down our faces. Nell and Becky waved goodbye until the bus was out of sight.
“Mama, do you think Daddy will ever come back?” she asked.
“No, not really,” she replied. “It’s time to get home, child.”
I had made arrangements at the boarding house if anything happened to me to call them. A month later, they made the call. They said I had passed.
It was hard for Becky to accept losing her daddy. But, she was grateful for being able to see me a few weeks before my death. Nell didn’t know what to say. I guess she believed I would live forever, that I would always be there. Her biggest regret was that she wished she had told me the truth a long time ago. But, she figures it doesn’t really matter now. Six months later, Nell passed. It took Becky a long time to let it go, but she was a strong willed person like both of her parents.
A few years later, Becky was in the attic and came across her mother’s diary. As she thumbed through it, she came upon the page with the words ‘One Night Stand’ written at the top. She’d heard us fight over it all her life. She then started to read what her Mama had written.
I talked to Mary Sue, my best friend, and she told me that she and Charlie have been slipping around. I told her that I hated her and that I didn’t want to ever see her again. We have been friends ever since the third grade. I can’t believe she would do that to me. It hurt me so that she and Charlie did this to me. I am bound and determined to make him hurt like he has hurt me. I broke up with him and called off the wedding. I went to the bar and grill and had a few drinks. James Allen came in and ordered a couple of drinks and started talking. He told me that he heard about me and Charlie breaking up and that he hated to hear it. He told me that Charlie was a good man and he hoped we could work things out. He got up and left so I followed behind him. He drove off and I went home. I wanted to confront
Charlie about his affair so many times, but I couldn’t.
Nell had made it up to hurt him. There never was anyone else. She was so controlled by the hurt that Mary Sue and Charlie caused her. That’s the result of a woman scorned. Her hurt eventually destroyed their marriage and home. Nell was obsessed by it and it was way out of her control. She wanted to confront him so many times, but she couldn’t. The picture was so much clearer to me now than ever before.
I thumbed on through the diary to see if I could find Mary Sue’s last name and she I. It was the Mary Sue I had figured. I raced downstairs and out the door. I headed to Mary Sue’s house not far down the road. When I got there and inquired about Mary Sue, I found out she had moved. I found out that she had died a few weeks ago. But her sister, who lived in the house now, had found a letter addressed to Nell. She gave it to me. I opened it and began to read.
Nell, we are both getting u in years and I just want to say I’m sorry for what I did. I tried to go with Charlie, but he wouldn’t let me. All he ever wanted was you and no one else. His rejection made me so hurt and jealous that I lied to you about our affair. Nothing ever happened, not because I didn’t want it to. I hope and pray you’ll forgive me. I have missed our friendship over the years, if it means anything to you.