‘Yes,’ I said, struggling to keep my voice calm. David held his arm out and pulled his sleeve up. I found an ampoule of my most recent brew and spiked it with a hypo. ‘Where did you pick it up?’
‘England.’
‘Is that where you’ve been?’ I asked, as I slipped the needle into his arm and sent the beckies scurrying into his system.
‘Some of the time.’
‘Why?’
‘Why not?’ he shrugged, and rolled his sleeve back up.
I waited in the kitchen while he showered and changed, sipping a beer and feeling obscurely nervous. Eventually he reappeared, looking better but still very tired. I suggested going out to a bar, and we did, carefully but unspokenly avoiding those we used to go to as a threesome. Neither of us had mentioned Rebecca yet, but she was there between us in everything we said and didn’t say. We walked down winter streets to a place I knew had opened recently, and it was almost as if for the first time I felt I was grieving for her properly. While David had been away, it had been as if they’d just gone somewhere together. Now he was here, I could no longer deny that she was dead.
We didn’t say much for a while, and all I learnt was that David had spent much of the last two years in Eastern Europe. I didn’t push him, but simply let the conversation take its own course. It had always been David’s way that he would get round to things in his own good time.
‘I want to come back,’ he said eventually.
‘David, as far as I’m concerned you never went away.’
‘That’s not what I mean. I want to start the project up again, but different.’
‘Different how?’
He told me. It took a while to understand what he was talking about, and when I did I began to feel tired, and cold, and sad. David didn’t want to refine ImmunityWorks. He had lost all interest in the body, except in the ways in which it supported the mind. He had spent his time in Europe visiting people of a certain kind, trying to establish what it was about them that made them different. Had I known, I could have recommended my Aunt Kate to him—not, I felt, that it would have made any difference. I watched him covertly as he talked, as he became more and more animated, and all I could feel was a sense of dread, a realization that for the rest of his life my friend would be lost to me.
He had come to believe that mediums, people who can communicate with the spirits of the dead, do not possess some special spiritual power, but instead a difference in the physical make-up of their brains. He believed it was some fundamental but minor difference in the wiring of their senses that enabled them to bridge a gap between this world and the next, to hear voices which had stopped speaking, see faces which had faded away. He wanted to determine where this difference lay, pinpoint it and learn to replicate it. He wanted to develop a species of becky which anyone could take, which would rewire their soul and enable them to become a medium.
More specifically, he wanted to take it himself, and I understood why, and when I realised what he was hoping for I felt like crying for the first time in two years.
He wanted to be able to talk with Rebecca again, and I knew both that he was not insane and that there was nothing I could do, except help him.
Room 211 was as I remembered it. Nondescript. A decent-sized room in a low-range motel. I put my bags on one of the twin beds and checked out the bathroom. It was clean and the shower still gave a thin trickle of lukewarm water. I washed and changed into one of the two sets of casual clothes I had brought with me, and then I made a sandwich out of cold cuts and processed cheese, storing the remainder in the small fridge in the corner by the television. I turned the latter on briefly and got snow across the board, though I heard the occasional half-word which suggested that someone was still trying somewhere.
I propped the door to the room open with a Bible and dragged a chair out onto the walkway, and then I sat and ate my food and drank a beer looking down across the court. The pool was half full, and a deck chair floated in one end of it.
Our approach was very simple. Using savings of mine we flew to Australia, where I talked Aunt Kate into letting us take minute samples of tissue from different areas of her brain, using a battery of lymph-based beckies. We didn’t tell her what the samples were for, simply that we were researching genetic traits. Jenny was now married to an accountant, it transpired, and they, Aunt Kate and David and I sat out that night on the porch and watched the sun turn red.
The next day we flew home and went straight on to Gainesville, where I had a much harder time persuading my mother to let us do the same thing. In the end she relented, and despite claiming that the beckies had ‘tickled’, had to admit it hadn’t hurt. She seemed fit, and well, as did my father when he returned from work. I saw them once again, briefly, about two months ago. I’ve tried calling them since, but the line is dead.
Back in Jacksonville David and I did the same thing with our own brains, and then the real work began. If, we reasoned, there really was some kind of physiological basis to the phenomena we were searching for, then it ought to show up to varying degrees in my family line, and less so—or not at all—in David. We had no idea whether it would be down to some chemical balance, a difference in synaptic function, or a virtual ‘sixth sense’ which some sub-section of the brain was sensitive to—and so in the beginning we used part of the samples to find out exactly what we’d got to work with. Of course we didn’t have a wide enough sample to make any findings stand up to scrutiny: but then we weren’t ever going to tell anyone what we were doing, so that hardly mattered.
We drew the blinds and stayed inside, and worked 18 hours a day. David said little, and for much of the time seemed only half the person he used to be. I realised that until we succeeded in letting him talk with his love again, I would not see the friend I knew.
We both had our reasons for doing what we did.
It took longer than we’d hoped, but we threw a lot of computing power at it and in the end began to see results. They were complex, and far from conclusive, but appeared to suggest that all three possibilities were partly true. My Aunt showed a minute difference in synaptic function in certain areas of her brain, which I shared, but not the fractional chemical imbalances which were present in both my mother and I. On the other hand, there was evidence of a loose meta-structure of apparently unrelated areas of her brain that was only present in trace degrees in my mother, and not at all in me. We took these results and correlated them against the findings from the samples of David’s brain, and finally came to a tentative conclusion.
The ability, if it truly was related to physiological morphology, seemed most directly related to an apparently insignificant variation in general synaptic function which created an almost intangible additional structure within certain areas of the brain.
Not, perhaps, one of the most memorable slogans of scientific discovery, but that night David and I went out and got more drunk than we had in five years. We clasped hands on the table once more, and this time we believed that the hand that should have been between ours was nearly within reach. The next day we split into two overlapping teams, dividing our time and minds as always between the software and the beckies. The beckies needed redesigning to cope with the new environment, and the software required yet another quantum leap to deal with the complexity of the tasks of synaptic manipulation. As we worked we joked that if the beckies got much more intelligent we’d have to give them the vote. It seemed funny back then.
September 12th, 2019 ought to have a significant place in the history of science, despite everything that happened afterwards. It was the day on which we tested MindWorks 1.0, a combination of computer and corporeal which was probably more subtle than anything man has ever produced. David insisted on being the first subject, despite the fact that he had another cold, and in the early afternoon of that day I injected him with a tiny dose of the beckies. Then, in a flash of solidarity, I injected myself. Together till the end, we said.
We sat for five minutes, and then got on with
some work. We knew that the effects, if there were any, wouldn’t be immediate. To be absolutely honest, we weren’t expecting much at all from the first batch. As everyone knows, anything with the version number ‘1’ will have teething problems, and if it has a ‘.0’ after it then it’s going to crash and burn. We sat and tinkered with the plans for a 1.1 version, which was only different in that some of the algorithms were more elegant, but couldn’t seem to concentrate. Excitement, we assumed.
Then late afternoon David staggered, and dropped a flask of the solution he was working on. It was full of MindWorks, but that didn’t matter—we had a whole vat of it in storage. I made David sit and ran a series of tests on him. Physically he was okay, and protested that he felt fine. We shrugged and went back to work. I printed out ten copies of the code and becky specifications, and posted them to ten different places around the world. Of course the computers already laid automated and encrypted email backups all over the place, but old habits die hard. If this worked it was going to be ours, and no-one else was taking credit for it. Such considerations were actually less important to us by then, because there was only one thing we wanted from the experiment—but old habits die hard. Ten minutes later I had a dizzy spell myself, but apart from that nothing seemed to be happening at all.
We only realised that we might have succeeded when I woke to hear David screaming in the night.
I ran into his room and found him crouched against the wall, eyes wide, teeth chattering uncontrollably. He was staring at the opposite corner of the room. He didn’t seem to be able to hear anything I said to him. As I stood there numbly, wondering what to do, I heard a voice behind me—a voice I half-thought I recognised. I turned, but there was no-one there. Suddenly David looked at me, his eyes wide and terrified.
‘Fuck,’ he said. ‘I think it’s working.’
We spent the rest of the night in the kitchen, sitting round the table and drinking coffee in harsh light. David didn’t seem to be able to remember exactly what it was he’d seen, and I couldn’t recapture the sound of the voice I’d heard, or what it might have said. Clearly we’d achieved something, but it wasn’t clear what it might be. When nothing further happened by daybreak, we decided to get out of the house for a while. We were too keyed up to sit around any longer or try to work, but felt we should stay together. Something was happening, we knew: we could both feel it. We walked around campus for the morning, had lunch in the cafeteria, then spent the afternoon downtown. The streets seemed a little crowded, but nothing else weird happened.
In the evening we went out. We’d been invited to a dinner party at the house of a couple on the medical staff, and thought we might as well attend. David and I were distracted at first, but once everyone had enough wine inside them we started to have a good time. The hosts got out their stock of dope, doubtless supplied by an accommodating member of the student body, and by midnight we were all a little high, comfortably sprawled around the living room.
And of course, eventually, David started talking about the work we’d been doing. At first people just laughed, and that made me realise belatedly just how far outside the scope of normal scientific endeavour we had moved. It also made me determined that we should be taken seriously, and I started to back David up. It was stupid, and we should never have mentioned it. It was one of the people at that party who eventually gave our names to the police.
‘So prove it,’ this man said at one stage. ‘Hey, is there a Ouija board in the house?’
The general laughter that greeted this sally was enough to tip the balance. David rose unsteadily to his feet, and stood in the centre of the room. He sneezed twice, to general amusement, but then his head seemed to clear. Though he was swaying gently, the seriousness of his face was enough to quiet most people, although there was a certain amount of giggling. He looked gaunt, and tired, and everybody stopped talking, and the room went very quiet as they watched him.
‘Hello?’ he said quietly. He didn’t use a name, for obvious reasons, but I knew who he was asking for. ‘Are you there?’
‘And if so, did you bring any more grass?’ the hostess added, getting a big laugh. I shook my head, partly at how foolish we were seeming, partly because there seemed to be a faint glow in one corner of the room, as if some of the receptors in my eyes were firing strangely. I made a note to check the beckies when we got back, to make sure none of them could have had an effect on the optic nerve.
I was about to say something, to help David out of an embarrassing position, when he suddenly turned to the hostess.
‘Jackie, how many people did you invite tonight?’
‘Eight,’ she said. ‘We always have eight. We’ve only got eight complete sets of table ware.’
David looked at me. ‘How many people do you see?’ he asked.
I looked round the room, counting.
‘Eleven,’ I said.
One of the guests laughed nervously. I counted them again. There were eleven people in the room. In addition to the eight of us who were slouched over the settees and floor, three people stood round the walls.
A tall man, with long and not very clean brown hair. A woman in her forties, with blank eyes. A young girl, maybe eight years old.
Mouth hanging open, I stood up to join David. We looked from each of the extra figures to the other. They looked entirely real, as if they’d been there all along.
They stared back at us, silently.
‘Come on guys,’ the host said, nervously. ‘Okay, great gag—you had us fooled for a moment there. Now let’s have another smoke.’
David ignored him, turning to the man with the long hair.
‘What’s your name?’ he asked. There was a long pause, as if the man was having difficulty remembering. When he spoke, his voice sounded dry and cold.
‘Nat,’ he said. ‘Nat Simon.’
‘David,’ I said. ‘Be careful.’
David ignored me, and turned back to face the real guests. ‘Does the name “Nat Simon” mean anything to anyone here?’ he asked.
For a moment I thought it hadn’t, and then we noticed the hostess. The smile had slipped from her face and her skin had gone white, and she was staring at David. With a sudden, ragged beat of my heart I knew we had succeeded.
‘Who was he?’ I asked quickly. I wish I hadn’t. In a room that was now silent she told us.
Nat Simon had been a friend of one of her uncles. One summer, when she was nine years old, he had raped her just about every day of the two weeks she’d spent on vacation with her relatives. He was killed in a car accident when she was fourteen, and since then she’d thought she’d been free.
‘Tell Jackie I’ve come back to see her,’ Nat said proudly, ‘And I’m all fired up and ready to go.’ He had taken his penis out of his trousers and was stroking it towards erection.
‘Go away,’ I said. ‘Fuck off back where you came from.’
Nat just smiled. ‘Ain’t ever been anywhere else,’ he said. ‘Like to stay as close to little Jackie as I can.’
David quickly asked the other two figures who they were. I tried to stop him, but the other guests encouraged him, at least until they heard the answers. Then the party ended abruptly. Voyeurism becomes a lot less amusing when it’s you that people are staring at.
The blank-eyed woman was the first wife of the man who had joked about Ouija boards. After discovering his affair with one of his students she had committed suicide in their living room. He’d told everyone she’d suffered from depression, and that she drank in secret.
The little girl was the host’s sister. She died in childhood, hit by a car while running across the road as part of a dare devised by her brother.
By the time David and I ran out of the house, two of the other guests had already started being able to see for themselves, and the number of people at the party had risen to fifteen.
After four beers my mind was a little fuzzy, and for a while I was almost able to forget. Then I heard a soft splashing sound from belo
w, and looked to see a young boy climbing out of the stagnant water in the pool. He didn’t look up, but just walked over the flagstones to the gate, and then padded out through the entrance to the motel. I could still hear the soft sound of his wet feet long after he’d disappeared into the darkness. The brother who’d held his head under a moment too long; the father who’d been too busy watching someone else’s wife putting lotion on her thighs; or the mother who’d fallen asleep. Someone would be having a visitor tonight.
When we got back to the house after the party, and tried to get back into the lab, we couldn’t open the door. The lock had fused. Something had attacked the metal of the tumblers, turning the mechanism into a solid lump of metal. We stared at each other, by now feeling very sober, and then turned to look through the glass upper portion of the door. Everything inside looked the way it always had, but I now believe that even this early, before we knew what was happening, everything had already been set in motion. The beckies work in strange and invisible ways.
David got the axe from the garage, and we broke through the door to the laboratory. We found the vat of MindWorks empty. A small hole had appeared in the bottom of the glass, and there was a faint trail where the contents had flowed across the floor, making small holes at several points. It had doubled back on itself, and in a couple of places it had also flowed against gravity. It ended in a larger hole that, it transpired, dripped through into a pipe. A pipe which went out back into the municipal water system.
The first reports were on CNN at seven o’clock the next morning. Eight murders in downtown Jacksonville, and three on the University campus. David’s cold. Reports of people suddenly going crazy, screaming at people who weren’t there, running in terror from voices in their head and acting on impulses they claimed weren’t theirs. By lunchtime the problem wasn’t just confined to people we might have come into contact with: it had started to spread on its own.
More Tomorrow: And Other Stories Page 9
