by A'zayler
Jamison kneeled on the floor next to the tub and looked at her. “You don’t have to trust me. You have no reason to. I just wanted to help you.” They stared at one another. “I watched you for almost two hours that night in the infirmary. You looked so broken. You need someone. I just want to help you. That’s all.”
She said nothing to his admission. Just leaned back against the tub and closed her eyes. She kept them closed and relaxed in the warm water, allowing her mind time to free itself. She could still feel his hands and the washcloth as he cleaned her. Her thighs clamped shut when she felt his hand sliding between her legs. Her eyes popped open.
“What are you doing?”
He mood was calm as it had been since the day she met him. “Giving you a bath.” He tapped the inside of her thigh lightly, urging her to open her legs.
Phoenix looked at him like she was confused or unsure of his motives, but she opened them slowly anyway. He proceeded to slide the cloth softly yet firmly over her vagina, making sure to clean it the best he could. He looked at her while he did it so that she would know there was no sexual misconduct going on.
He stayed there, rubbing and lightly grazing her core with his rag a little longer than necessary and Phoenix smiled.
“I think it’s clean now.”
He smiled and removed his hand. “I just wanted to make sure.”
“I’m sure you did.” She smiled harder. Her smile almost felt foreign to her. It hadn’t graced her face in months.
“You’re really beautiful, Phoenix.”
She stopped smiling.
“I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but you don’t look like you were in a murder mob.”
Phoenix’s smile returned and was followed by laughter. “A murder mob?” She nodded her head. “Never heard that before. I like it.”
Jamison smiled at her and grabbed a towel out of the same container he’d grabbed her washcloth from. He unfolded it and held it out so that she could step into it. He made sure it was wrapped securely around her and told her to follow him. She did as she was told and they entered a small bedroom with a pink and green floral print comforter on it.
“You can sleep in here.”
“Whose room is this?”
“My sister. She died last year from breast cancer.”
Phoenix looked at him. “Not in here right?”
He laughed and shook his head no. “At the hospital. You’re good. There’s still a few of her things in the drawers and closets. Feel free to grab something.”
“Why do you keep her room like this? It doesn’t make you sad?”
“It used to. Not anymore. Some days I sit in here and think about all of the good times we had and it makes me feel like she’s still here.”
Phoenix nodded slowly as water built up in her eyes again. “I don’t have anything left of my brother.”
Jamison didn’t know what to say, so he just wrapped one of his arms around her shoulder and pulled her into him. “It’ll be okay.”
“When? Because right now I feel like I just want to die too.”
“I’ve been there. Like I told you earlier, it’s going to take time, but you’ll be fine eventually.”
Phoenix looked at him with sad eyes. “I hope so.”
“It will.” He pushed her toward the room casually. “Get you some rest. I’m going to go shower.”
Phoenix walked in slowly looking around at all of his sister’s things. She still had pictures, perfumes, hair accessories and everything lying around her dresser. The room was clean, but she could still feel her presence. She could feel Jamison’s eyes on her as she ran her hand over the brush and lotions.
“Can I use these?” She looked up at him.
“Use anything you like.” He smiled weakly and walked away.
Phoenix looked around the room. Checking the drawers and closet, the clothes were all around her size as she scanned them for something to wear. While looking through the drawers she found a light pink pajama set. The orange boy shorts from Victoria Secret still had the tag on them, so she grabbed those and slid them on. She got dressed before sitting in the middle of the bed and tugging on her hair. It was a mess.
With the small variety of hair products on the dresser Phoenix combed her hair out and French braided it down into two braids and pinned the ends up. After putting lotion all over her body and spraying a light sheen of perfume on her, she sat in the middle of the bed Indian style. She was messing with her toes when she felt Jamison’s presence. When she looked up he was looking at her.
“You remind me of her.”
“Your sister? I do?”
He nodded and walked into the room. In his hand was a wallet sized picture of a brown skinned girl with black hair. It was flat ironed down around her shoulders and she was smiling brightly. Phoenix could tell why he said she reminded him of her. Had her eyes been a tad bit bigger, Phoenix and Jamison’s sister could have gone for sisters.
Judging by the size of the clothing they had been around the same size. All of her clothing fit her perfectly.
“She used to sit in here just like you were just sitting. She told me it gave her the perfect view of the mirror.” He chuckled and looked into the mirror at the same time Phoenix did. “I miss her so much, but I’m making it. I had to move on, Phoenix. I couldn’t spend my life mourning her death. I had to make the conscious choice to cherish our memories instead.”
Phoenix could see where he was going with his conversation. She could even understand it. Tone and Tek’s death was still so fresh to her. Not to mention the heartache she felt from Ollie’s betrayal and Zino and Bear’s incarceration.
“Use everything that you’re going through to make you stronger. Don’t let this get you down, Gram.”
Phoenix leaned her head on his shoulder and took the picture of his sister from his hand. She held it to her chest and sighed.
“She was so pretty.”
“She was… but so are you.”
“I used to be. I’m sure I look a mess right now.”
Jamison reached his arm out and wrapped it around her. “You look fine. You hungry?”
She nodded and he stood from the bed.
“Well, come on. I’ll make us a quick breakfast.”
Phoenix followed him until they reached the kitchen. She took a seat at the table while he busied himself around the kitchen.
“What was your sister’s name?”
“Jamie. We were twins. Fraternal.”
“I had a twin once.” She giggled lowly. “I guess you could call us fraternal too since we looked nothing alike. We didn’t even have the same parents.” She giggled again. “We did everything together. He was like my real brother.”
“He’s in jail?” Jamison said it more as a question than a statement.
“Yes.”
“What was his name? I know you real brother’s name was Tone right?”
“Yes, it was. My twin’s name was Zino.” Phoenix could feel herself getting sad again. “Can we talk about something else? I’m going to cry.”
Jamison turned from the stove and looked at her over his shoulder. He turned around and slid the eggs off of the stove and walked over to her.
“Come here, Phoenix.” He pulled her from the chair and sat down in it instead.
When he was sitting, he scooted the chair back and pulled her onto his lap like a child would sit on Santa. He put her legs across his lap so that she was lying in his arms and across his lap. He massaged her scalp the way he had the night in the infirmary and held her tightly against his bare chest. In nothing but a pair of flannel pajama bottoms, Jamison held Phoenix until she got herself together.
“I’ll be here for you, Phoenix. I know you don’t know me, but you remind me too much of my sister. I can’t leave you out here like this.” He placed a kiss on her forehead. Nothing seductive, just comforting. “I’ll be here for you as long as you want me to be.”
“Thank you.” Phoenix snuggled closer to his chest
so that her face was cradled into his neck. “Can I just lay down? I don’t want to eat.”
“Sure.” He stood from the table and walked her back to his sister’s room. He pulled the covers back and lay her in the bed. “You want me to stay with you?”
“Please…” Phoenix looked up at him with her red wet eyes.
“Let me go make sure everything is off in the kitchen and I’ll be right back.” He left the room for a few minutes before coming back and turning the lights off.
Jamison slid in the bed facing her and pulled her into his arms. He rubbed her back methodically until she fell off to sleep.
Cradled in his arms, safe from all of his troubles, Phoenix slept. That night and every night following it for the next two months, she found solace in Jamison.
Chapter 17
Two months later…
“I can’t believe you’re still pining over that little ghetto girl.” Aaliyah scoffed. “I mean, what more do you want? I’ve allowed this mess to go on for the last few months, but I’m tired of it now. You need to get out of your damn feelings and do your fucking job.”
Ollie sat on the plastic lawn chair near the pool in his backyard. He was barely listening to Aaliyah. Her nagging had become so constant; it was like all he heard whenever he was around her. Yeah, he may have been dwelling on the fact that no one had seen or heard from Phoenix since the day she’d been released.
At first it hadn’t bothered him too bad, until he really sat down and thought about it. All of her family was gone and she was lost in a city where more people hated her than loved her. It had been killing him slowly thinking about what could have happened to her. Ollie released a frustrated breath and tried to rub the stress lines from his forehead.
“If she is dead, then so be it. It’s not like she was worth keeping alive anyway.” Aaliyah’s voice had him gritting his teeth.
“Yo, Aaliyah, for real. Shut the fuck up, aight? I don’t want to hear none of that shit you’re talking about. If you keep on, I’m putting your ass out. I’ve got enough bullshit to deal with at work. I don’t need it at home too.”
Aaliyah sucked her teeth and popped the top on her coke. With her shades pushed on her face, she lay back on her chair and closed her mouth. Ollie was glad because she was starting to be a pain in his ass. All he wanted to do was figure out a way to do his job without constantly being haunted with what could be going wrong with Phoenix.
When Francisco had first approached him about helping with the case, he had been all for it. That had been until two different occurrences began to prevent him from doing his job. The first one being he’d fallen in love with Phoenix. The next one was when Francisco’s son, Jamar, came down from Georgia. He had taken a serious liking to Phoenix and it made Ollie mad.
He had never really been a fan of Aaliyah’s brother due to the things she’d told him about him. They’d never met in person, and still hadn’t, but he held a strong dislike for the nigga just because. Had his father and sister not been in law enforcement, his ass probably would have been locked up a long time ago. Especially if it was left up to him.
Things were going well with him and Phoenix. She had begun to open up to him, and not only was he getting the information he needed for work, but he was getting what he didn’t get from Aaliyah and that was a peace of mind. Phoenix provided him with love, solitude, and sincere feelings. Something he didn’t have with Aaliyah.
Once Aaliyah’s punk ass brother Jamar stepped into the picture, things began to get complicated. She stopped telling him stuff and she began keeping a little more distance between them, which only got worse when Aaliyah came. Why Francisco thought adding her to the equation was a good idea, he didn’t know. That was one of the worst things he could have ever done. Now shit was all bad on his end and for the life of him he couldn’t grasp a hold of it.
Ollie drank the rest of the Sprite that was in his can and stood from his chair. He stretched before walking away from the pool and heading for his house. He needed to shower and get ready for work. Today he was supposed to go with Francisco to see Zino and Bear, and he wasn’t ready for it at all.
He had become so close with all of the men that facing them seemed almost impossible. He’d already gone a few times in the past, and each time felt worse than the last. They would always look at him like the scum he was. Ollie flipped the shower on and remembered a time where he was proud to be the man he was. Dealing with the Zoo Crew had him reconsidering things now.
It took him a few hours to get ready before he was dressed and out of the house. In his car headed to the precinct to pick up Francisco, his phone rang. When he picked it up, he saw that it was Aaliyah. He didn’t even bother to answer. He threw it back on his passenger seat and continued to his job. He called Francisco on the way letting him know that he was about to pull up.
He told him he would be right out, so when he got there, instead of parking, he pulled to the front of the building and waited. Not even five minutes later he came down the stairs dressed impeccably in his tailored suit. When he got in, the bumped fists and proceeded to buckle his seatbelt.
Ollie drove the couple of miles to the jailhouse. When he parked, they went in, got processed and took their places in the room Zino would be brought into first. They would speak with Bear afterwards. Ollie could feel his heart beating when the door opening. Zino walked in. His dread locs were longer and needed to be re-twisted terribly.
His tall frame in the navy blue two-piece uniform settled in front of them at the table. His face was hard and unmoving as it had been from the first day they’d brought them in. Just like the last couple of times they were there, his gaze landed on Ollie and that’s where it remained. It was as if Zino was setting Ollie on fire and burning him into ashes right in front of him.
“Mr. Brantley. How are you? Feeling generous today?” Francisco started.
Zino’s face nor his body moved. He remained stoic and unmoved. His gaze had Ollie’s armpits and the back of his neck sweating.
“Guess not, but maybe you will be when I finish.” Francisco crossed his hands together and leaned over the table. “You know Phoenix was released right?”
Before today that information hadn’t been released to anyone. Not even the news. So Ollie wasn’t surprised when Zino’s eyes traveled to Francisco.
Francisco laughed. “I figured that might get you talking.” He nodded his head. “She’s been out for about two months now. However, we’re not sure what’s going on with her. No one has seen or heard from her since.” Francisco shrugged. “I’m not sure if that’s a good or a bad thing. What do you think?”
Zino sat still, not saying anything. His eyes gave away that he was thinking about Phoenix and what Francisco had told him, but he still said nothing. He’d even returned his glare back to Ollie.
Tone had really trained some soldiers, Ollie thought. The more he watched Zino, Bear, and Phoenix endure continuous interrogations from the cops, he realized he was never like them.
They were of a different breed, and he couldn’t compare. Being thrown into the hole, not being fed, being interrogated for hours at a time, they still never broke. He almost envied them. Wishing he had half the heart that they did.
“Now, Mr. Brantley, if you can tell us what we want to know, you could be out and free to find her. She’s all alone, I’m sure she needs someone.”
Zino’s eyes went back to Francisco but he still said nothing. That same behavior went on for another hour before they decided he wasn’t going to break and sent him back to his cell and waited for Bear.
“These are some tough kids. Him and the girl are hard to be so young. I would have assumed something would have broken them by now.” Francisco told Ollie.
“That’s not how they operate. Trust me.”
Francisco was about to say something else until the door opened and Bear walked in. His presence nearly took up the whole room. It was so overpowering, Ollie could hardly stop his leg from shaking. He was so nervous he’
d reached for a tie that wasn’t even there. He’d chosen not to wear one and had totally forgotten just then.
“Big Bear!” Francisco taunted. “How you feeling, my friend?”
Silence. Bear did the same thing as Zino. He stared at Ollie.
“Hey, hey, hey,” Francisco tapped the table. “Look over here. Let me talk to you for a minute. I know you’re tired of talking to us, so I’ve decided to offer one more thing to you before trial.”
Bear said nothing as he watched Francisco with the same look Phoenix and Zino held whenever they were being questioned.
“I know how much you love these kids. If you can admit to your part in all of this, I would be willing to give the other two a deal.”
Ollie’s mind went crazy for a second because that was the first he’d ever heard of that. He didn’t know whether Francisco was lying or being serious at the moment, so he sat quietly, waiting to see how it would all unfold. He was almost anxious because one thing he’d learned from Bear was that he was loyal. He would most definitely bite at the offer.
“What kind of deal?” His deep burly voice echoed throughout the empty room. It almost sounded like he was talking through a bullhorn.
“I’ll give the kid ten years and the girl will serve two.” He held Bear’s gaze. “For you, since you already have an extensive criminal history, the best I can do for you is life with the possibility of parole.”
Bear looked at the wall behind Ollie’s head. He seemed to be thinking about it. Something like that sounded harsh to Ollie’s ears, but Bear was a soldier. The oldest of the crew and more of a father to them all than anything. It didn’t take long for him to look back at Francisco and nod his head.
“Cool.”
“Great. We ca—” Francisco was stopped by Bear’s voice.
“I need to see it in writing, and before I tell you anything, I want to talk to both of them. Phoenix and Zino.”
“Sure… sure.” Francisco nodded.
Bear looked from him back to Ollie and stared long and hard. Ollie fidgeted a little with the papers in front of him, but he could still feel Bear’s eyes on him. When he could find nothing else to do, he finally looked up. When he did, he was nearly blinded by the glob of saliva Bear had just spit into his face.
