by Taylor Hart
Mike hesitated. “Sloane understands and respects you. After all, you’re both ex-military and both have too many brothers to count.”
JJ wanted to put up his polished mask and laugh at Mike’s joke, but he wasn’t feeling it. Losing his dad had not put him in a great mental state. As a SEAL, he’d learned that controlling his thoughts led to control of all else, and he desperately needed control right now. “No,” he said flatly. “I’ll be there tonight.”
“Okay.” Mike cleared his throat. “Everyone’s been asking about you. Tonya said…Uh, she said you broke things off?”
He didn’t want to discuss Tonya and the social media mayhem that would ensue when the press got hold of the breakup. “Yeah, I did.”
“Wow, JJ.”
“Look, it just…” How did he explain what his father’s death had helped him realize? “It wasn’t right.”
Mike let out a sigh. “Okay, we’ll figure it out. Tonya told me she’s fine still working with you.”
JJ tensed as he thought of their number one hit song. Clarity couldn’t have come at a worse time in his career.
“JJ?”
He ran a hand through his hair. How many texts and calls had he ignored from Tonya in the last three days? Too many to count. “I gotta run.”
“Okay, I’ll catch you tonight, if I see you, or in the morning.”
JJ got out of the car and put his credit card into the gas dispenser. “Yep.” He pressed end and put the phone back inside his pocket. His thoughts trailed back to his father. If family meant everything to him, he should have told his sons he was dying!
He squeezed his eyes shut. “No. No. No!” He kicked the back tire with his cowboy boot, and then he chided himself. He wouldn’t have a breakdown at a gas station. The only other time he’d felt this discombobulated was five years ago, at his mother’s funeral. That was when he’d punched Dustin. The guy had deserved it, but JJ still shouldn’t have lost control.
Seeing Chantel yesterday had been like a drink of fresh water after too long in the desert. He smiled, remembering how they’d held each other. It’d felt so right. With a deep breath, he looked at the sky. The storm wouldn’t be letting up anytime soon. He had to get on the road before it got worse.
Once he’d finished gassing up, he rushed into the convenience store to get some food. He thought about this little issue with Parker. Strike that, major issue. The man wouldn’t budge about trying to work with the rest of his brothers for their charities. After the funeral he’d barely spoken to them.
Dang it, his brother was stubborn. JJ knew that, for Parker, this was about much more than getting married.
This was about Arianna Claire.
The girl he’d fallen in love with at seventeen. The girl who’d left town in the middle of the night without a word. Without a call, without a social media shout out. Most importantly, without explaining to Parker why she’d left. He’d been searching for her on and off since then.
JJ silently cursed and tried to focus on picking a snack. His mind felt like a pair of Yahtzee dice. He forged through the shelves, pausing at the Ho Hos. How many Ho Hos had he bought for Chantel over the years? He fingered a package. Too many to count.
JJ’s heart ached. She would be married soon. He’d known she would come to the funeral, but she looked so different now. Her blonde hair was curled softly around her shoulders, and she was older, more mature. Duh. Of course she was. At his mother’s funeral, she’d worn her hair pulled back tight, the same way she’d worn it their entire lives, because she trained so hard every day on the ice.
Holding her yesterday, feeling how much she cared, how real she was, was the reason why women like Tonya would never work for him. Too bad it was too late.
Ryan had whispered to him later, “Chantel looks good. Did you know they’re going to release doves and have a hot-air balloon? The wedding’s going to be on the beach, too.”
JJ had nodded, hating the way his gut was tangled into a mess. “That’s good for her,” he’d managed to say. Too bad all he could think about was how she’d always told him she would get married on the ice.
After all, ice skating was her thing.
Ryan had told him. “I always thought she was your destiny, dude.”
Destiny. The word had played through his mind like an off-key note all night as he’d tossed and turned, dreaming about them together, growing up. They’d been wading in the river, their feet freezing, and she’d been laughing.
When he’d woken, it startled him how real the dream had felt. Then it’d ticked him off that it wasn’t real.
Since his father’s plea to find “the one” last Christmas, JJ had thought of reaching out to her hundreds of times. In fact, in January he’d sent her a Facebook message that he was in town, and he’d asked if she wanted to do dinner. She’d responded that she and her fiancé could meet him.
He hadn’t replied. He didn’t want to see her fiancé. So he’d focused on Tonya and their relationship—a relationship he’d just ended.
A weird feeling passed over him and the hair on the back of his neck stood up, just like when he knew he’d be seeing Chantel. But that was dumb. She was with her fiancé in California by now. Or, if they hadn’t already left, he was pretty sure they’d be heading back soon.
His phone buzzed and he saw a text from Ryan. Be safe, bro. Call me later. Don’t forget, the destiny gods are watching over you. And don’t forget to work on Parker.
Annoyance flitted through him, but he grinned. Ryan thought he was so funny talking about the destiny gods. You too, butthead. JJ sent the text, rushed to the bathroom, then rushed through the aisles and grabbed a protein bar and water.
Waiting in line at the cash register, he opened the protein bar and bit off a piece, nervously looking out at the sky. Again, his thoughts went to Parker. His brother had always been stubborn, but after joining the FBI he was like a steel trap. No one could get in or out. But JJ knew he’d change his mind. He had to.
“You going to eat that or kill it?”
Jerked out of his thoughts, JJ turned back and saw the last person he’d expect to see in a gas station in Steamboat Springs: Chantel. “What are you doing here?”
She held up two Ho Hos, all casual-like. “Getting a snack.”
The woman he’d just been thinking about, the snack he’d just been thinking about…Ryan’s words went through his brain. I thought she was your destiny. “I was just thinking of you,” he blurted.
Letting out a long sigh, she took the sunglasses from her face and pushed them back onto her head. Her eyes were red, and she didn’t have any makeup on. “I just can’t believe Jack’s gone.”
His arms opened so she could fall into them, and as he held her, her grief mixed with his own. Just like yesterday. She smelled like suntan lotion, something coconutty. Which was stupid. He shouldn’t be smelling her.
Carefully, he pushed her back. She still looked so prima ballerina-y—which he used to tell her, and she’d always shove him, roll her eyes, and spout, “Ice skater, not ballerina.”
Chantel glared at him. “I want you to know I’m still mad at you for ghosting me for dinner last January. Why did you do that?”
“I’m sorry about that.” He looked around, trying to catch a glimpse of her fiancé, but he couldn’t stop himself from looking at her perfectly shaped lips. She’d always had that natural beauty. He tried to focus. “Where’s Dustin?”
“Oh.” She jerked, and he caught her staring at his lips too.
“Next,” called out the store attendant.
JJ put his hand out for her to go first.
She moved ahead of him, putting down two packs of Ho Hos and a water.
He moved closer to her, trying to be casual. “So…?”
“I suppose he’s almost back in California by now.”
“Oh.”
Her eyes narrowed. “How’s Christie or Kerry or Tonya or whoever you’re engaged to?”
“You mean Tonya.”
“Right.”
Cautiously, he looked at her ring finger. The flashy, gaudy glass he’d seen at the funeral was gone.
“One bus ticket, please,” she said to the cashier when the person in front of them moved out of the way.
JJ looked outside and saw a Greyhound bus idling in front of the station. “Chantel, wait, where are you going?”
She finished paying, and another sad smile crossed her face. “Good to see you.” Reaching out, she gently squeezed his arm, then flung back the door and rushed out.
He scrambled out of line, stuffing his snacks on a stack of newspapers. He caught the door behind her. “What are you doing?”
“Getting on a bus,” she called out over her shoulder.
“Why isn’t Dustin with you?”
She threw up a hand. “I told you, he’s in California.”
“Chantel!” he called out, moving toward the bus. “Wait!”
The bus honked its’ horn. Chantel rushed toward it.
Without thinking, he followed, prodded by the same feeling he used to get before going into combat or going onstage for a concert. He thought of the story Sloane Kent told about meeting his wife on a Greyhound bus.
“Chantel!” he called out again.
The smile fell from her face as she turned to face him. “JJ…” She waved him away. “Go back to your tour. Go back to your fiancée, okay?”
“Would you just come talk to me for a second?”
“Leaving in ten minutes,” the bus driver called out, staring straight ahead.
Chantel pushed her chin into the air. “JJ, I don’t think your fiancée would be happy about you talking to me.”
He studied her. “What about your fiancé?”
Looking caught, she lifted and lowered one shoulder. “I don’t know. I guess—” She broke off.
“What?”
She threw up her hands. “What do you want me to say, JJ? Not everything is perfect right now between me and Dustin.”
He pointed to her hand. “Where’s your ring?”
She closed her eyes. “I gave it back.”
His heart raced. He rubbed his head, hardly believing the coincidence. “Why?”
She looked away, picking again at her fingernails.
He grabbed her hand. “Chan? What is going on?”
“We’re on ‘pause,’” she air quoted.
Baffled, he couldn’t understand. “You’re on what?”
She raked a hand through her hair. “We got in a huge fight because he wants me to put the property up for sale and I told him no.”
Extreme calm filled him. It was the same calm he tried to harness whenever his SEAL team was called in to take down very bad people. He thought of Dustin and what he’d said at his mother’s funeral. “My father gave you that land, not him.”
“I know,” she said, her eyebrows turning down. “He just wants to start a new life and have me forget the past.” She scratched her head. “I have to go, J.”
“Chan, wait.” Seeing her tears about undid him. “Just tell me the truth. Why are you getting on a bus to Dallas by yourself?”
She put her hand to her forehead and squeezed her eyes shut. “Did you know I got the silver medal, J? Did you know that?”
He was confused about why they were talking about this right now. “Of course.” He let out a light laugh. He’d watched her compete on television. “You were amazing that night, Chan. I watched it all. Had it on record and watched it again.”
Her eyes flashed open. “You did?”
“I wouldn’t miss it.”
Her lip trembled and she blinked rapidly. “Have you ever wondered if everything you gave up was worth it?”
That put him on edge. Was she talking about them? Their relationship? His military service? “What’s going on, Chan?”
She looked down, picking at her fingernails —one of her clear tells that she wasn’t okay. “You screw things up and you don’t always get your dreams, do you?”
“Are you talking about getting the silver medal and not the gold, or something else?”
Her gaze hardened, and she shrugged. “I have to go.” She moved back to the bus.
“Tell me what pausing means,” he called out.
Surprising him, she let out a laugh and covered her face. “I can’t believe this. I just can’t believe it. I run into you right before…I can’t believe this.” She stomped her foot, stared at the sky, and threw her hands up. “Is this my punishment?”
“You’re not making sense.”
She flung back to face him. “Yesterday, I paused my engagement. My three-year engagement. Ten days before a wedding Dustin and I have been planning for three years, including the release of doves on the beach at sunset.” She stared at him with fragile, vulnerable eyes—a look he’d only seen one other time.
Another loud honk.
She jolted.
JJ stepped closer, feeling all the old chemistry ratcheted up between them.
Her face turned sad, her eyes filled with tears. “You left me there. Just standing on the tarmac. Why? Why did you do that?”
Stunned, his mind rewound to that day. “Chantel—”
“Don’t!” She stepped back, frowning deeply, and held up her hand. “Just don’t.” With that, she turned, rushed up the stairs, and disappeared.
Chapter 4
JJ cursed. To see Chantel Bonaparte coming apart at the seams was pretty much the worst day of his life.
“Better make a decision quick. T-minus three minutes,” called out the bus driver.
“Just go buy the ticket.” Someone called out behind him.
JJ jerked toward the voice. An older gentleman, wearing worn clothes and holding a worn carpet bag, moved past him and up the stairs, handing the mustached driver his ticket. The man turned back and winked at him. “Second chances don’t come easy, JJ Kelly. Better act quick.”
JJ thought he might know the man with the carpet bag. He squinted at him. “Who are you?”
The man laughed. “Maybe I’m your Christmas angel. Wouldn’t that be funny?”
Confusion assaulted him, and he thought of Clarence in It’s a Wonderful Life, one of his mother’s favorite Christmas movies. “I…” Could this be destiny or a second chance? Could he get on this bus with her?
No. Logic took over and reminded him about the tour and how fast lead singers could be replaced. If he got on this bus now, he’d be out of the band and out of the tour.
The man turned back, cupping his hand like he was telling him a secret. “Listen, the girl is out of sorts, and it seems like she might need some help. Are you really going to let her ride this bus to Dallas all by herself?”
Bam. The truth hit him like a ton of bricks. The man was right.
JJ bolted back to the gas station. He snatched up his previously discarded snacks and thrust them on the counter. “A ticket to Dallas please.”
After he bought all of it, he rushed to his car and retrieved his duffel bag and guitar. Then he ran for the bus.
“You’re lucky,” the driver said, taking the ticket. “The old man with the carpet bag convinced me not to leave you.”
The carpet bag man sat right behind the driver. Her jerked a thumb at himself. “I’m his angel,” he stated proudly.
JJ nodded to him. “I think you are. Thank you.”
The bus driver jerked the door shut and took off.
His angel pointed to the back of the bus. “Better go talk to her.”
JJ put his hand on a seat to steady himself as the bus moved. This whole day had been crazy.
When he reached her seat, Chantel was staring out the window.
“This seat taken?” he asked.
Her eyes met his and a blank look had replaced the previous tears. She turned back to the window. “Nope.”
“Great.” He put his snacks on the seat and quickly took his coat off, then opened an overhead storage compartment and stuffed it with his coat, guitar, and duffel bag. He gestured to the backp
ack by her feet. “Do you want me to put your bag up here?”
“No.”
He closed the compartment, picked up his snacks, and sat. He didn’t care how long he had to sit on this bus with Chantel; he was determined to help her feel better. After he twisted open his water and took a gulp, he offered her his protein bar. “Want a bite?”
Chantel’s expression was still vacant, but, again her eyes misted with tears.
Dang it. He hated when women cried, and he really hated it when he saw Chantel cry. He knew what to do when a war broke out or when an enemy was encroaching on an ally’s territory, but he never knew what to do with tears. He put his arm around her, like he had when they were kids.
“Don’t.” She started to pull back.
But he held her tighter. “You’ve been my friend forever, Chan, so just hush now.”
Surprisingly, she let him settle her next to him, resting her face against his shoulder. He breathed in the scent of her coconut shampoo and brushed his hand down her beautiful, soft, blonde hair.
She stopped crying but kept her head on his shoulder. “You shouldn’t have come, JJ.” Her tone was quiet.
“Yes, I should have.” She clearly needed someone.
“Okay, but I don’t want to talk.” She pulled back, folding her arms and staring out the window as the miles rushed by.
His mouth felt dry and all he could do was think about that day on the tarmac. The day he’d left her and she’d never forgiven him for. “I had to go back to my team, Chan. I…” He didn’t have the words to explain. He knocked his prosthetic leg. “Guess I paid for my choice, didn’t I?”
For another beat, she looked out the window. “We’ve all paid for our choices, J.”
Uncertainty filled him. “I’d like you to explain to me what we’re talking about.”
Chapter 5
“You shouldn’t have come,” she repeated, knowing it was stupid to argue with an ex Navy SEAL. If she knew anything about JJ it was that once he decided something, arguing was pointless.
“But I did.”
There was no way JJ could come to Dallas with her. “You are in the middle of your tour. Your dream is right there in front of you, so just take it.”
