He was a kind soul, kinder than any other human she'd ever met. He had his angry side, but didn't they all? But it was in his DNA to help when someone needed help. Any Walker would give someone the shirt right off their back.
Ella realized that she was lucky to get a second chance. Her pettiness could quickly get in her way if she didn't come to grips with the fact that Gerald loved her, and from what she'd learned, he'd always loved her.
Sinking into the warm water, she let her head fall back, and her body float. It was going to be a very long night waiting for Gerald to return.
Chapter 28
Night had turned into twilight, and Ella's eyes were still open in the stillness. She'd tried to go to bed and rest. She'd done everything she'd ever been taught. Warm milk. Nice warm bath. Yoga. TV. Reading. The list was significant, but sleep eluded her.
There was only one thing left to do. She thought as she swung her legs over the edge of the bed. She didn't only clean when she was mad. She did it when her mind wouldn't shut off, too.
Ella started in the kitchen, which was tidy enough since she hadn't been home to cook or eat. She scrubbed the sink, the counters, and the inside of the refrigerator. The floors were next, and then dusting and vacuuming the living room. By eight o'clock that morning, her house sparkled and smelled fresh. She opened the windows and looked out into the back yard taking in the glory of the beautiful morning. It was almost serene enough to make her forget why she'd been up all night cleaning.
Gerald, for what it was worth, had spent the night with Lydia.
Oh, her mind was so stupid to frame it like that. Lydia was in a freaking hospital with a head injury and loads of emotional and physical trauma. What did Ella expect? Gerald wasn't going to sacrifice what they had and make a play for Lydia. It was just the way the human mind worked, and who knew that better than Ella Mills, who worked with the general public and their ever-changing mindsets. She'd more than once defended someone she didn't think was innocent, but in their twisted minds they thought they were. She'd seen an innocent person change their pleas, too, because once facts were given, they didn't believe they were innocent. So she knew it was just her head playing games with her, none the less it was devastating.
And that, too, bothered her, she thought as she made herself a cup of tea. None of this should be devastating to her. She wasn't the one that had been kidnapped, beaten, and who knew what else. She wasn't dead or left for dead. And she didn't kill a man. Lydia had, and she needed her family and her friends. Gerald was a good friend.
She'd seen Tyson's saddened look when his sister turned him away for Gerald. Gerald was a friend, and sometimes people needed a friend more than a family member, especially when going through something traumatic. Ella sure as hell would rather have Candi nearby than her sister if something like this had happened to her. Not that her sister couldn't bring her comfort, but there was something about talking to your best friend that made it all seem okay. Families carried your pain and friends could help you process it.
Gerald sat in the corner of the sterile room, his body contorted uncomfortably under the blanket the nurse had given him in the middle of the night. He stretched, yawned, and ran a hand over his unshaven face.
"You look like crap," Lydia's raspy voice broke through the silence.
"So do you, so don't go calling names," he joked as his voice found its correct pitch. "How do you feel?"
"As crappy as I look, apparently."
He sat up in the chair and wadded the blanket into a ball behind him. "Have they been in here to check on you?"
"Nearly every freaking hour," she complained. "They'll let me go later," she said, but tears filled her voice, and then he noticed them in her eyes. "Physically, I'm okay. Wounds heal. But they want to have me go to a facility for a while. You know, a mental facility."
That brought him to his feet. "You don't need that. You have family and friends to help you through this."
Lydia held up her hands to ward him and his anger off. "I do. I have a brother who would have given up his life to make sure I didn't get hurt. And that says a lot because he's a family man now. And my friends," she chuckled as she wiped away a tear. "Look at you. You slept in that chair, you drove all over Georgia looking for me, and you left the woman of your dreams to be here with me. Even Phillip…" She let out a laugh and left it at that. "My friends are invaluable. But, Gerald, I'm going to need more."
"We can get you more—more of whatever you need."
She smiled, and the tears seemed to have stopped. "I carried a lot of baggage with me before this, and I hid all of that away with my work. Now, I can add kidnapping, abuse, murder, and more to the list of things I have to overcome to become who I was—and be an even better version."
There she sat in a hospital bed, her face marred by the monster that hurt her, and she was strong enough to admit she needed help and was going to take it. Gerald only wished he was as strong as Lydia Morgan.
"So what does this all mean?" he asked as he walked to the side of her bed.
"It means that when they release me, they will take me from here to a facility, a different hospital if you will. I'm not going to tell anyone where it is. I don't want anyone to worry about me."
"Too late. I'm already worried."
"I'm okay, Gerald. This opportunity is going to make me stronger. Tyson knows what to do about my house and bills. He's going to talk to Todd and Bethany about them running my venues. I've gone too long without dealing with things, and it's time I do. This needs to be dealt with."
He wondered if the attack from Les Martin was the only thing she was dealing with. For some reason, he felt as if there were more.
"Don't take too long to heal. Some of us are used to you being knee-deep in our business."
She laughed now and then winced when it hurt. "You need to get back to your lady."
"Fiancée," he admitted. "We're going to try this again."
"I think that's good. She never left your heart."
"No, she never did."
"And I don't think you ever left hers, no matter what happened."
He touched her hand. "I think you're right. I'd feel better staying until they come for you."
"I'm going to be okay. You can trust me on that."
Gerald leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. Yes, he knew he could trust her on that.
Chapter 29
Gerald sat in the car and rested his eyes for just a moment after parking in front of Ella's house. Every ounce of him was exhausted. He had texted Ella earlier to let her know he was heading home, and she'd told him to use the spare set of house keys she kept in her glove box. He felt horrible that he'd kept her car at the hospital. It wasn't the first thought on his mind when he'd sent her with Tyson.
The drive back to Macon had been long. He'd considered pulling over and sleeping on the side of the road, but in reality, he just wanted to get back. He just wanted to get some rest, but they'd have a lot to talk about.
Taking the keys from the glove box, he climbed out of the car and headed to the front door. The moment he unlocked it and walked inside, he could smell the fresh pine scent. She'd been cleaning again.
It told him everything he needed to know. Ella had been up all night fuming about him staying with Lydia. That wasn't completely unexpected. He was prepared for her to come at him with claws out. He'd get angry, and she'd feel foolish. Perhaps if he went into it with that kind of knowledge, he could defuse the situation faster.
What he wasn't prepared for was the sound of a something smashing to the tile floor in the kitchen, and the curses that followed.
Gerald hurried to the back of the house and found Ella standing over the broken coffee mug, coffee pooled at her feet, and her hands covered her face. Her shoulders bounced as she cried into her hands.
"Are you hurt?" he asked as he eased his way toward her, doing everything he could not to step in the mess between them.
"No," she sobbed. "I'm fine. I'm fine!" She dro
pped her hands and wiped at her mascara-stained cheeks. "I said I'm fine!"
Gerald stepped back and watched as she moved for the small closet and pulled out a broom.
"Let me get that for you," he offered, and she pulled the broom closer to her.
"I can clean up my own messes, Gerald. I can take care of myself. This is my house and my kitchen, and if I break a freaking mug on the floor, I'll clean it up."
Okay, so it was worse than he'd expected.
Stepping back, he watched as she swept up the wet ceramic mug and dumped the shards into the trash. When she ripped the paper towel off the holder and knelt to wipe up the remaining coffee, she sat down next to the puddle and cried. What else could he do but to sit down across from her and wait for her to talk.
The coffee on the floor had nearly dried before her tears had.
"I got fired," she said as she wiped away the last of her mascara. "They called me on Saturday and told me I'm not a serious enough lawyer for the firm. They landed one of the biggest cases they've ever had. They need all hands on deck, but they can't trust that I'll be good for the team. So I'm unemployed."
"Ella…"
She held up her hand to stop any further comments. "I'm mad. I'm downright pissed."
"You should be. You worked hard, and you deserve…"
"I deserve exactly what I got, Gerald." She let out a long, ragged breath. "I'm mad because I was fired, but deep down inside I'm more mad because I don't care. I didn't want to work divorce cases or fight over fender benders. I thought I did, but that's not what I'm looking for." She lifted her eyes to meet his. "I gave up something good to chase that dream, and now I don't want it."
"What do you want?"
"I want a normal life. The life I dreamed about so many years ago. The one you're offering me again."
"We'll have that, and it doesn't matter if you're a lawyer in that life or not."
She chuckled now, the tears only stains on her cheeks. "I didn't handle any of this very well," she admitted. "I got too worked up over you staying with Lydia."
"I can smell the pine," he humored, and she shook her head with a smile.
"I clean when I'm mad."
"I suppose I'll know our life is perfect when we live in a messy house."
"Now, don't go that far. Even when I'm joyous, I'm clean."
Gerald reached across the dried puddle on the floor and took her hand. "I love you. Lydia is going to get some help to manage this. She's going to a hospital where they will help her sort all of this out, and then I think she's going to take an extended trip to Hawaii. She needs her space." He licked his lips as his mouth had gone dry. "I know that losing your job doesn't compare, but if you need some time to manage it all as well, I'll let you be until you know what you want."
He'd expected her to tell him that it wasn't necessary. He waited for her to say to him that her mad was over and she was going to be okay.
But Ella didn't say any of that. "Maybe that's what I need. A little time to process everything that has happened. I mean you have to admit, we went from not talking to engaged rather quickly."
Gerald opened his mouth and shut it again. What the hell would he have said? He'd been the one to offer her an out if she needed it, and she was taking it.
Her eyes were brighter now, and her shoulders relaxed. "I think that's what I need. I need time away to process everything. I'll make arrangements and fly out tomorrow to see my parents. Maybe for the week, maybe two. Why don't you drive me to the airport and you can stay here. It's cleaner than any hotel."
"Ella, you don't need to go anywhere. I'll take care of you—support us both until you decide what you want to do. Don't leave."
"I have to. If nothing else, I need to take the lead from Lydia and take care of me before I can take care of us."
"But we're okay, right?"
Ella tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and took a moment to think. "What happened to Lydia could have happened to me, or one of your cousins, or your sisters-in-law. It could happen again to one of our daughters." She bit down on her thumb just as she had when they'd gone to give Gerald's alibi to Phillip. "I didn't even talk to her, but seeing her walk out of that house, it's going to haunt me for a long time."
"All the more reason you should just stay here, and we can deal with it all, together."
The red had drained from her cheeks, and now she smiled at him, content in her decision. "I'm not going away forever. But I need to reconnect with my family. I find that I get so jealous over the way your family comes together and how they handle things. I need some of that. I want that."
He wanted to say he understood, but he just didn't. Her family had never been like that. Why did she think that it would be different now?
"You're part of my family," he argued.
Ella squeezed his hand gently. "I will be. You have no idea what it will mean to me to be a Walker. It's like an elite club. I realized that the other day when I happened upon their lunch. And not one of those women, Lydia included, acted as if I trespassed on their day. I belonged, Gerald."
"Then why go?"
"I have to."
Chapter 30
And the next day Ella was gone, just as she'd said she'd be. After they had mopped up the kitchen, she'd tucked herself away in her bedroom and made flight arrangements and talked to her mother. Gerald had offered her time to think, and she'd taken him up on it.
Now, what was he going to do?
He had full use of her car and her house, but it didn't feel right. It wasn't his home. For the first time in his life, he didn't feel as if he belonged anywhere.
The first night Ella was gone, Gerald slept in her bed, alone. When he woke, after only a few hours of sleep, he fussed over making the bed, just as she would have. He drank her coffee, ran her dishwasher, and left her house feeling unfulfilled.
Ben and Dane had texted him and said they had started in on his list of work out at the ranch. They, too, figured he needed some time to process what had happened to Lydia.
He'd heard from Phillip that she'd been transferred to another hospital, but he didn't know where. As desolate as Gerald felt, he could hear the strain in Phillip's voice telling him that he was brokenhearted.
The next call he took, as he wandered around the immaculate house in silence, was from his mother. She'd invited him out for dinner, and there was no excuse worthy enough for him to miss it.
The drive out to Walker Ranch seemed longer than it ever had. Perhaps it was that the BMW didn't rattle like his old, faithful truck. Maybe it was that he was driving slower to avoid being around people—family. Then again, it might just be that he was missing Ella desperately. She'd only been gone a few hours—but this time she promised to come back.
When Gerald made the last turn toward the main house, he could see the mass of vehicles parked in front of it. This was no cozy dinner. His mother had made sure to invite every Walker from both sides of the family. Even his uncle's car was accounted for, as was Phillip's.
Gerald parked down the road, behind Missy's car, and climbed out of the BMW. He took in the sight. Only his mother could command such a turnout on such short notice. No doubt she had pulled in Susan to help her cook.
"Everyone's inside. You can't just stand out here," Todd said as he rounded the side of the house with a garbage bag, which he threw into the can next to the garage.
Gerald walked toward him, hooking his thumbs in the loops of his jeans. "Why is she doing this?"
"Your mom?"
"Yeah."
"Walker healing. Just like after grandpa died, she brought us all together so we would remember what was most important."
"Family," he said softly, thinking about Ella's reasoning for leaving. "So what are your plans for taking over Lydia's businesses?"
Todd let out a grumble. "I always told her I'd help her out in any way, but I don't know if I can handle this. Bethany and I are going to be in over our heads."
"You'll make it work. I assume
Tyson and Pearl will manage the day to day business at the Bridal Mecca since they own part of the building."
"Yeah, that's no worry. The other businesses all have partnerships. We have to check in on them." Todd rubbed his hand over the back of his neck. "It only comes down to managing the reception hall. How hard can that be?" He posed it as a question, but Gerald heard the statement of self-doubt.
"You're going to do fine. I'll cover your work out here on the ranch."
Todd lifted his head and looked out over the sea of cars. "Where's Ella?"
Gerald kicked the gravel at his feet. "Went to her parents' place to clear her head."
"A lot happened in the last week. Being with family grounds you. I'm sure that's what your mother is trying to do. Hell, she even has Phillip here. He's a mess, by the way."
"I talked to him. He sounded bad."
The front door opened and Bethany stood there looking out at them, her red hair piled atop her head. "You two joining us?"
Gerald slapped a hand on Todd's shoulder, and they walked toward the house. The Walkers had been through it all. Demented cops who tried to kill Eric and kidnap Bethany, ex-husbands, and ex-relatives who took the children they loved, accidents, theft, and serial killers. For a moment Gerald felt the pettiness of his sadness weigh down on him. Every person inside that grand house had been affected by something on their journey to being who they were.
As Bethany smiled at him, Gerald thought of her drug addictions and how she'd taken the time to cure herself, just as Lydia was choosing to do.
Bethany planted a kiss on his cheek as he walked through the door, and then put her arm around the shoulders of her brother as they all walked back the kitchen where his family had gathered. Brothers, parents, cousins, uncles, kids, and friends gathered for what looked like a feast. Smiles greeted him. Worried gazes caught him. Love filled him.
Walker Defense Page 13
