Chapter Thirty
The Wisdom of Archimedes
“Gobstoppers!” Neil wheezed. “You sure keep some heavy junk in your lab, Lefty!”
After several moments of heaving and straining, the Beans had to take a break from their efforts. They staggered back from the pile of cabinets and hardware that had fallen on Lefty, contemplating their strategy. It had become clear that they would not be able to achieve their goal simply through brute force.
“What we need here,” Lefty opined, “is the application of a little science!”
“I’m all for science,” Sara wheezed between breaths. “What’s your suggestion, Mr. O’Houlihan?”
“Well, as Archimedes, the great scientist of ancient Greece famously declared: ‘Give me a lever long enough and a fulcrum on which to place it, and I shall move the world!’ It’s physics, you see?”
Despite Lefty’s obvious enthusiasm, the Beans looked at each other uncertainly.
“Um… we haven’t really covered physics in school, yet,” Jack informed his uncle.
“We’re in fifth grade, sir,” Sara reminded Lefty.
“And I’m in the fourth,” Maria added.
“Not to worry, Beans, I shall educate you from my place upon the floor, and you’ll be putting this ancient principle into motion in no time,” Lefty assured them. “First, we shall require a lever of substantial length… see that steel rod, in the corner there? That should do nicely.”
Neil and Sara scurried over to the object in question, and then began dragging it over toward Lefty. It was a long rod, measuring about twelve feet in length. Nibbler watched them with his ears raised and his head tilted inquisitively.
“Excellent, children! Now for the second part of this equation – the fulcrum. Ah! That reinforced crate should do nicely. Please, bring it closer. It should be placed about three feet from me.”
As Lefty had requested, Jack and Maria began sliding the heavy crate to where he had asked them to put it.
“Perfect! Now we shall see the science of Archimedes in motion! Wedge one end of the rod underneath this cabinet that has me pinned down. Then, position the rod so that the middle of it rests atop the crate. Yes, that’s the ticket!”
The Beans did as Lefty instructed, and they had soon set up the rod and the crate exactly as the trapped scientist wished.
“You see what you’ve created here?” Lefty asked. “It’s like a seesaw! The rod is the lever, and the crate is the fulcrum. The closer you place the fulcrum to the weight you want to lift – that being all this junk on top of me at the moment – the longer the lever becomes, and so increases your leverage. The additional leverage translates into additional power! That’s why Archimedes claimed that he could lift the very world itself, given a sufficient lever. Now, simply apply your might to the other end, and see what happens!”
The Beans hurried to the end of the lever, opposite of where Lefty was trapped. They found Lefty’s enthusiasm to be infectious, and they were eager to see this scientific principle put into action.
The lever was angled up, due to its placement on the crate. The four of them grasped the rod, and they applied their combined strength, pushing down on it. As they heaved with great valor, their increased leverage made the cabinets that had pinned Lefty slowly begin to rise (much to the joy of the Beans).
But try as they might, they could not get the pile of debris to rise more than a few inches. After several moments of exertion, the Beans were forced to take a break.
“That was excellent!” Lefty declared. “Do you see how much more effective that was? That was really great… it’s just too bad that I wasn’t able to wriggle free!”
“Don’t worry, sir, we’ll get you out of there, yet,” Neil panted, as he stretched his shoulders and rubbed his arms. “One way, or the other!”
“It seems that I must have eaten too many Snickerdoodles,” Lefty chuckled sheepishly. “And my arms are pinned in a most uncomfortable position by my sides. Not to mention that I’m still partially snagged in this confounded MegaNet of Ebenezer’s. All we need to do is increase your power… we can move the fulcrum closer to what you’re trying to lift, and create even more leverage.”
Just then, a small, furry figure darted past the feet of the Beans, racing along the floor. Nibbler barked in excitement, and then began wagging his tail at the sight of the creature.
“What was that?” Maria asked, as the thing zoomed by in a blur. “That looked awfully big for a mouse, don’t you think?”
Jack pointed at the small figure, as it sprinted toward Lefty. “That’s not a mouse! That’s Murphy!”
“Um… who now?” asked Sara.
“Murphy, the King of the Squirrel Folk!” Jack breathlessly explained. “He’s a flying squirrel with enhanced intelligence, a descendant of Project Acorn… well, I suppose it’s kind of an odd story, now that I hear myself try to explain it aloud.”
“Dang, we missed all kinds of good stuff before we got here, didn’t we?” Neil asked, as he squatted down on the floor to get a better look.
But before he could catch more than a glimpse of Murphy, the squirrel had darted into the pile of debris that lay atop Lefty.
“Whoa, where’d he go?” Maria wondered, as she also crouched down to inspect this curious animal’s behavior.
After a brief moment, Murphy once more appeared, emerging from beneath the cabinets. He stood before the Beans with what seemed to be a triumphant pose, squeaking in his squirrelly language. With his two front paws, he hoisted a shiny item above his head, as if he were showing off a trophy of immense value. It glimmered and glittered, reflecting light from its shiny surface.
As he squinted his eyes at the item in Murphy’s paws, Jack recognized what it was. “Why, he’s pilfered your pendant!”
Lefty laughed with unrestrained delight. “That’s a clever squirrel! Excellent work, Murphy. There will be many Snickerdoodles in your future, I promise you!”
Neil exchanged a worried look with his friends, and lowered his voice to a whisper. “He must have gotten gob-smacked on the noggin a bit harder than we thought!”
“Nonsense!” Lefty protested between chuckles.
“Oh, um… you heard that, did you?” Neil asked sheepishly. “No disrespect, sir. I just don’t see how this little guy stealing your pendant is going to be of much help to us in this particular situation.”
“My pendant isn’t just a piece of jewelry, you see,” Lefty explained. “Upon its surface is engraved a miniscule copy of the periodic table of elements, the core of chemistry. It is a symbol of science, and that which I hold near my heart… But it also serves another, very important purpose.”
Murphy ran over to Jack’s feet, and stood before him. The squirrel held the rectangular pendant as high as he could, seeming to offer it like a gift. Jack slowly bent down and took hold of the item, accepting it from Murphy, who willingly relinquished it with a cheerful squeak.
The first thing Jack noticed when he took the pendant was that it felt surprisingly warm… very, very warm. He turned it over in his hands and peered at the etchings of the miniature table, and all the many elements that it represented.
“That isn’t just a pendant, m’boy,” Lefty told him. “What you hold in your hands is my backup… My second, and final power cell.”
The Green Beans, Volume 2: The Strange Genius of Lefty O'Houlihan Page 30
