by Ash, Nikki
My dad, Bentley, Kaden, and Caleb got there just in time with the police and they were arrested. But I didn’t know he left them that day.
“You couldn’t have known.”
“No, I couldn’t have, but it doesn’t matter. We all make choices that affect those around us. Marco shouldn’t have left without telling you. He’s a twenty-six-year-old man. He’s had to grow up too fast in some ways, but in other ways, he still hasn’t grown up.”
“I’m afraid if I forgive him, I’ll look like a fool. Especially if he does it again.” I’m shocked to admit it out loud, but I feel relief to have said it.
“Love isn’t easy, Bella. All you can do is listen to your heart. Every one of us have fucked up and anybody who cares about you isn’t going to judge you, but that doesn’t mean you should run back to him with open arms. Make him earn that. Because if you let him get away with it, he will continue to do it.”
“Thank you, Caleb.”
I head to the office to talk to my dad, and as I’m walking over, my mom comes walking in with Micaela, Lilly, and Nathan. “Mom!” I run over to her, pulling her into a hug, Micaela becoming the crème in our Oreo. “She’s gone, Mom.”
“Who’s gone?” My dad comes out of his office and asks.
“Elsa. They put her down.”
“I’m so sorry, sweetie. I brought her to Dr. Rowes this morning when she wouldn’t walk on her own. I wanted to call you, but you were already dealing with so much.”
“It’s okay. I got to say goodbye. I loved her so much.” Then I turn to Nathan and Lilly. “How are you guys doing?”
Lilly shrugs. “We said goodbye to her this morning. I’m sad to see her gone, but she wasn’t doing well.”
“I’m sorry you lost your dog, Bella,” Nathan adds. “I mean, she was all of ours, but even when you were away at college, she slept in your room.”
“Thanks, Nate.” I give him a hug.
We all go into dad’s office and spend the next hour talking about Elsa and our memories of her. I will miss her so much.
Eventually Mom says she needs to head to the rec center and Lilly and Nathan head out with her. After I feed Micaela, my dad and I go over a schedule, and he sends me some videos of Shawna Fields’ previous fights to look over at home, and when I can’t avoid my house any longer, I go home.
I walk inside to find the table set similar to the way it was the other night. There’s a different array of food this time and the table is where it belongs instead of in the living room, but it has the candles in the center.
“I figured with you training, you would want to eat healthy so I made dinner.”
“Hmm… this feels a lot like déjà vu. Oh wait, this did happen. The dinner. The candles. And I don’t really like how that all ended. What, with you leaving and all. So, I think I’ll just pass on dinner. I’ve had a long, shitty day, and I can’t deal with you right now.”
I go to walk away but Marco stops me in my tracks. “Please just eat,” he pleads, and of course at the moment, my stomach growls. “What have you eaten all day?”
“I was busy putting my dog down, thank you very much. Then I went to the gym to work out.”
“You had to put Elsa down? Why didn’t you call me?”
“Marco! Seriously? Why would I call you? You have made it a habit of breaking my heart, not piecing it together, so I’m pretty sure the last person I would call when I need to be comforted is you.”
Marco’s head hangs, but I don’t have the energy to feel bad. “Okay, I get that. I hate that you can’t come to me or count on me to be there for you. But you can at least let me feed you.”
“I’m not hungry,” I say stubbornly.
“Belles, you’re breastfeeding and training. You need to work out a food plan. You need high proteins plus you need to eat several small meals to make sure you and Micaela are getting the nutrients you both need.” I know he’s right. I didn’t even think about any of that.
“How about we eat dinner and then we can go over a meal plan?” I want to say no, but he’s trying.
“Fine. But only because it will help keep my mind off Elsa and I need a meal plan.”
After dinner, we go over a meal plan and Marco says he’ll pick up the food tomorrow so we can put them together for the week.
After I get out of the shower, he knocks on my half-open bedroom door. “Can I come in?”
“I guess.”
Sitting on the bed next to me, he holds out a box. “I bought this for you for Valentine’s Day. You know, before I messed everything up.”
Taking it from his hands, I open the teal blue box and inside is beautiful silver charm bracelet with a heart dangling from it, and written on the heart says Mom.
“It’s a locket,” Marco says.
I open it up and nestled inside is a tiny picture of Micaela. “It’s beautiful. Thank you.” I take it out of the box and hand it to Marco to put on me.
“I know Valentine’s Day is supposed to be romantic, but it’s also about love. No matter what happens between us you will always be the mother of my child and you are a damn good mom, Bella.”
He leans over and gives me a soft kiss on my cheek before standing up. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Marco.”
The next several days we fall into a routine. I leave to work out for a few hours, my mom watches Micaela, and Marco has dinner waiting when I get home. He always makes sure my meals for the day are packed and he never asks to take Micaela. The food he makes is always healthy and delicious and we always eat in silence. Finally, after a week or so, I decide to ask Marco something that’s been on my mind while we’re eating dinner.
“Why aren’t you at the gym working out?” He looks shocked at my question, which I don’t understand. He’s been fighting his entire life. Sure, I appreciate that he’s doing some laundry while I’m gone and having dinner ready, but what I don’t get is why he isn’t working out. I know he’s been attending more meetings, but those are only like an hour long.
“I can’t,” he mumbles. I didn’t even think about the fact that he hasn’t been cleared yet.
“When do you go to the doctor?” He just shrugs and continues to eat.
Several more days pass and our routine continues. Then one day, my dad says, “So I take it Marco found another gym to train at.”
“What do you mean?” I huff out, hitting the mat flat on my back as my dad throws me into an arm bar for the takedown. I smack the ground in frustration, tapping out. Every time my dad sweeps my legs, bringing me to the ground, I get even more pissed. Standing up fighting, I got that shit all day, but the minute I hit the ground I’m fucked. I used to be so good at ground fighting, but as I got older, I focused more on stand-up fighting and less on grappling. Now it’s become my weakness.
My dad reaches his arm out and I take it, letting him help me up. “Well, he must to be training somewhere. The fight is coming up and he’s got to be freaking out.”
“My fight?”
“Well, honey, I mean, yes, it’s your fight, but Marco is getting paid six figures to defend his belt on top of what he gets paid in his contract.”
“What?” I say louder than I mean to. “Marco isn’t fighting. He’s not even allowed to.”
“Unless I misunderstood Daniel, Marco is fighting and he’s the main event. It will be announced in a few days. Daniel called to see how Marco is doing, but I told him he’s not training here. Marco’s got a lot at stake here. If he wins, his bonus is huge, so he has to be training somewhere.” He pulls out his phone and shows me the text.
Daniel: Marco is cleared. You training him?
The conversation continues, and everything my dad said is true. Marco is fighting the same night as me as the main event. I am stumped by this. Every day I’ve left to train, Marco has acted like he’s been home or at a meeting. Is it possible he’s leaving to go train somewhere else? He’s been giving me space since the whole California thing happened. He doesn’t go to my parents
with me, and he hasn’t stepped foot in this gym since we returned, but would he really lie to me about not being able to train? And why? Why hide the fight? It’s not like I’m not going to see him at the MGM Grand on fight night.
“None of this makes any sense.” I grab my bag and head home to find out what the hell is going on. Before I take off, I text my mom and tell her I’ll be by the rec center to pick up Micaela, but she says Marco has her. She dropped her off to him a couple hours ago because she had a meeting she needed to go to.
I send her an angry text because seriously? She knows I don’t trust him and she goes and leaves Micaela with him without even letting me know. She texts back she’s sorry and that it was an emergency, and I immediately feel bad because she is already doing me a favor by watching my daughter. If she had to drop Micaela off to Marco, it had to be for a good reason. She wouldn’t just do that for no reason. I send her back a text apologizing and thank her for watching Micaela.
When I walk through the door Marco stands and looks at me confused. “I didn’t expect you home yet.”
“Yeah, well, I found something out today and figured I should come home and give you a chance to explain.”
“Okay…” Marco takes my hands and pulls me onto the couch next to him. I pull my hands out of his and back up a bit so we aren’t touching. He frowns and says, “Talk to me.”
“You said you weren’t cleared. You lied.” He flinches but quickly composes himself.
“No, I said I couldn’t fight. You assumed that meant I wasn’t cleared. I just didn’t correct you.” I glare at him because really… lying by omission. Will this man ever learn?
“So, you can fight.”
“No, I can’t.” He shrugs and hits play on the television to continue watching whatever he was watching, trying to end this conversation.
Not happening.
Grabbing the remote, I click pause and toss the control to the other side of the couch. “Don’t ignore me, Marco. Why can’t you fight?” The look he gives me is one I’ve never seen before. It looks like he’s scared, which is crazy because Marco is one of the strongest people I know, at least physically anyway.
“Marco,” I say again.
“Fine! I’m fucking afraid, Belles!” He scrubs the side of his face with his hand and I keep quiet to let him continue. “I’m afraid I’ll go back to getting high. I’m afraid of the pain. Then there’s the fact that one of my best friends is lying in a coma because of my fighting. I spent the last four years training with him and now he’s in a goddamn coma. I’m a dad now and I’m trying to make shit right with you. Look what happened a few weeks ago. I had a shot of liqueur, and yeah, I know I can drink if I want to, but it’s not smart. I’m just trying to stay above water right now.”
In this moment, my heart breaks for this man. He has been through so much his entire life and the only time he was truly happy was when he was fighting and now the one thing that makes him feel whole is the very thing he’s afraid of.
I crawl into his lap to be close to him, suddenly missing Marco and our friendship. We might be living in the same house, but we have been a million miles apart lately. His words of admission remind me how fucking human he is. His entire world imploded the night of that accident. Then there was the pain and drugs and what happened with us.
He turned to the one thing he swore he never would do, the very thing that killed his mom. And now he’s associating fighting with everything bad that’s happened.
“Hey,” I whisper. Marco’s hands hold onto my thighs lightly, his face looking down between us. “Hey,” I repeat. This time his face lifts and I can see the tears. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I hug him as tight as I can. We sit like this for I don’t know how long before I pull back.
“Are you still in pain?”
He shakes his head slowly.
“You’ll get through this.” I give him a small smile before getting up. As I go to swing my leg over to the other side, Marco’s hand grabs my thighs tighter, sending an electrical charge straight to my center.
“Marco…”
“I need you, Bella.” He pulls me close to him and nuzzles his face in my hair. “I miss you so damn much. It’s like I was given a sample, but when I went to order the full portion, it was sold out.”
I roll my eyes and laugh softly but go along with his analogy. “No, it was more like you had the perfect, homemade, cooked to perfection meal right in front of you and you walked out without finishing dinner.”
I don’t hear Marco, but I feel him shaking with laughter. “I was stupid, Belles. I’m so hungry.”
“Yeah, well, maybe next time you won’t choose a drive thru over a home-cooked meal.” It’s meant as a joke but Marco stiffens and I feel bad for throwing that in his face. I know he didn’t do anything with Janell or any other woman for that matter. “I’m sorry.”
“No, don’t apologize. I’m going to earn your trust back, Belles. But not just your trust, I’m going to earn your mind and your body and your heart. One day, you will be completely mine and I will have earned it.”
Silly boy… if he only knew—he already owns me, all of me, every piece of me: mind, body, and heart.
Chapter Thirty
Marco
Ever since Bella and I talked the other night, it seems like we’ve moved into a new type of comfort. We aren’t back to where we were before I fucked it all up by leaving, but I’d like to think we’re at least back on track and heading in the right direction. We watch TV together at night, converse during dinner more, and we have been to my parents’ house to visit several times. It’s like we’re back to being friends again except we have a baby together. It’s been nice.
I do have to say I’m kind of shocked that Bella hasn’t pushed me more since I admitted to her my fears about fighting. We haven’t even spoken again regarding my admission. So, when she stumbles into the house trying to carry a big box inside, while I’m in the middle of folding clothes, I’m not at all suspicious.
“Whoa, there! Let me help you.” I grab the box from her tiny hands and pick it up to bring inside. Once I set it down in the living room, I take a look at the picture and see it’s a stroller. “Don’t we already have a stroller, Belles?”
She closes the door behind her and smiles. “It’s a better stroller. Will you help me set it up?”
I’m not sure why we need a better stroller for a three-month-old baby that weighs like ten pounds dripping wet, but I’m not going to argue. Bella rarely buys anything other than what’s needed. She’s not your typical female and it’s one of the things I love about her.
“Sure.” We spend the next hour putting the stroller together. Once we’re done, I check it out. Instead of four wheels, it has three huge ones, the front one being able to swivel. It has a couple cup holders, a large area underneath the seat for storage, and the thick handlebar goes across the top. It’s a sturdy stroller, but I’m still not sure why we needed another one.
“What do you think?”
Bella jumps up and down squealing, clapping her hands together. “I love it! Let’s try it out now.”
“Okay…” I’m still confused as to why we can’t just take Micaela for a walk in her other stroller. “I’ll grab her from her room. She’s due to wake up from her nap anyway. Once you feed her, we can head to the park. But afterward I have to go to my meeting. It’s important I’m there tonight.”
“Oh, Marco! Are you getting your six-month tag tonight?”
“Yeah.” I shrug nonchalantly. “Any chance you might want to go?”
“Yes! I am so proud of you. While I get ready, call your mom to see if she wants to spend some time with Micaela and then I can go with you.”
“Okay, Belles.”
“Oh! And I want to go somewhere else besides the usual park. Make sure you put on comfortable shoes.” She gives me a wink then walks away, picking up Micaela to feed her.
After I’ve gotten dressed and confirmed with my mom she can hang out with Mic
aela for a little bit, I come out to find Bella putting our daughter into her car seat. We throw the stroller in the back of my SUV, and since Bella insists on driving, I jump into the passenger seat. About twenty-five minutes later, we pull up to Red Rock. I haven’t been here since the day I kissed Bella. God, it seems like that was a lifetime ago.
“Wanting to take a walk down memory lane?” I joke.
She frowns but quickly recovers and says, “I was thinking more like a jog.” And then it hits me. She’s just tricked me into working out. She’s fucking slick, I’ll give her that much. I should have seen this coming.
“Belles, I don’t think…”
“Nope, don’t think. We are going for a jog, that’s it.” She jumps out of the vehicle and grabs the stroller from the back, popping it open. I can’t help but stare at the way her spandex pants mold around her tight round ass. She bends over to put the diaper bag underneath and her full tits, which barely fit in her sports bra thanks to her breastfeeding, practically spill out from the top. When she stands back up, her belly ring glitters in the sun. The woman is completely unaware that she’s like a walking billboard for MILF porn.
Of course, she catches me staring at her. “What?” She looks down at herself. “Do I have something on me?”
“No, you’re just fucking gorgeous.”
Her nose scrunches up and she rolls her eyes. “Shut up.”
“I’m serious.” I grab her hips and pull her over to the side of the vehicle, pressing my body against hers. She blushes the cutest shade of pink when my hard-on makes its presence known against her stomach. Nuzzling my face into her neck, I murmur softly into her ear, “Your sexy ass, babe. It’s on fire.” My hands glide over her hips and land on her ass, giving it a squeeze. “And those perky fucking tits are just begging to be sucked.” My mouth goes down to her cleavage and I give the top of each tit a soft kiss. “Fuck, and that goddamn belly ring that I want to lick. Belles, you are one hot mom.”
