Confessions (Tattoos & Tears Book 3)

by Amiee Louise

  “God, that smile melts me every time, angel. You’re so beautiful, soon-to-be Mrs Peyton Leigh Newbolt,” he says huskily.

  Sam stalks towards me, pulling me out to the balcony of our room in Lucas’ house in North Las Vegas. The sun is just setting, and it is breathtaking. The orange and pink hues on the horizon make it look like something from a picture postcard. My back is to his warm, hard chest; Sam wraps his arms around my waist and settles his hands on my stomach.

  “This is the best day of my life so far, angel. You agreeing to be my wife, you carrying our child. I’m so happy right now I could shout from the fucking rooftops. Today is the first day of the rest of our lives.”

  We both laugh, and he is right, I have never been happier. Our perfect moment is interrupted as someone clears their throat behind us.

  “Just give us a sec.”

  Sam spins me around and presses his lips to mine in a kiss that claims me as his.

  “Remember this moment always, angel.”

  This moment will be forever seared into my memory for as long as I live. This will be a fairy tale I will tell our baby and our grandchildren in years from now. He pulls away, and we walk back inside.

  “The car’s downstairs, Sam,” J.D says in a clipped tone, and Sam nods curtly.

  I suddenly realise I have forgotten my bag and my phone.

  “I’ll catch you up, baby; I need to grab my bag.”

  He smiles his dazzling dimpled smile.

  “Hurry, angel, I need my good luck charm.”

  He winks and leaves the room. I grab my phone and my bag, and as I go to leave the room, J.D grabs my arm so roughly I know there is going to be a bruise. He leans in so close I can smell the stench of alcohol on his breath.

  “This ain’t Mills and Boon with guitars, darling. Girls like you don’t get happy endings, pregnant or not.” He sneers, and the cold tone of his voice makes me shudder. “Remember that, sweetheart.”

  He winks and let’s go of me. There is something off about him, and I can’t quite put my finger on it; just his sheer presence unnerves me. I push that thought to the back of my head and go to head downstairs to join the rest of the boys. For the first time in my life, I am so happy, and this moment is the first day of the rest of my happy ever after with Sam. I am smiling so wide my jaw aches, and I feel our baby kick as I go to walk down the stairs.

  “I know baby, mummy feels you, boo.”

  I giggle at the unfamiliar feeling of our baby kicking. It never fails to amaze me after the first time I felt it earlier on today in the car on the way back from the best day of my life: Sam proposing to me in the Aquarium at the Mandalay Bay. I am in such a world of my own that I don’t feel the strong hand that clamps over my mouth. I rear my elbow back weakly in a reflex reaction, and I hear the ‘hummpfh’ from a male voice as my elbow connects with his gut. He laughs maniacally as I start to sag in his iron grip. He has a white handkerchief over my mouth, and I am helpless in his arms.

  “That’s it, don’t fight me.”

  J.D’s familiar, evil voice fills my ears, and I limply try to fight him.

  “Relax for me. This will all be over in a few hours, and you’ll be out of Sam’s life, for good this time.”

  My limbs feel like lead, and my vision is blurry. What the fuck is happening?

  “Sam,” I slur.

  “Sammy isn’t coming to your rescue this time, bitch; do you fucking get that now?” He spits, and my limbs give out underneath me.

  I feel him dragging me along the floor. That’s when I succumb to the darkness, and everything went black.

  ***

  Present

  I am jolted back to the present by the rasp of Sam’s voice.

  “Angel, where did you go?”

  I shake myself from my previous thought, and his worried green gaze locks onto mine.

  “You were remembering weren’t you?” he says gruffly, and I nod slowly as I try to rid myself of the memories that haunt my every thought.

  “What would I have found if I had gone back for you, angel? I have to know if I could have saved you… if I could have stopped all this from happening.”

  The pained look in his eyes breaks my heart, and a lone tear tracks its way down my cheek.

  “Sam, don't. There’s no point torturing yourself on what if, babe. There’s nothing you could have done.”

  He squeezes my hand.

  “Let me be the judge of that, angel, please just fucking tell me,” he pleads.

  I turn my head away from him, desperately trying to forget the events that happened.

  “Look at me, angel,” he says in his commanding tone and my eyes meet his.

  “He cornered me at the top of the stairs, grabbed me, drugged me and proceeded to tell me how you weren’t coming to my rescue this time. He dragged me into one of Lucas’ spare rooms and left me there. The next thing I remember is coming around, tied to a chair in a derelict warehouse.”

  I close my eyes at the memory, wishing I could forget those hours and erase them from my mind. I hear Sam growl and when I open my eyes to look at him; his eyes are full of fire and fierce rage.

  “Motherfucking cock sucker,” he curses.

  “He had his fucking hands on you, angel, and I could have fucking stopped him!”

  I shake my head as he unexpectedly lunges forward and crashes his lips to mine in a bruising, pant-melting, heart-stopping, searing kiss. I feel his desperation as I moan softly into his mouth, his tongue seductively dancing with mine. I feel his hand snake down my ribs, as I urgently grab and claw at his shirt. I’m wanting and silently pleading with him, to take me right there on his sofa. Our breathing is ragged, and I can feel his heart pounding in his hard, warm chest.

  He moves his hand from my ribs and cups my breast. I gasp as his thumb finds and strokes my pierced nipple into a hard-erect bud. I wrap my arms around his neck and gently tug the hair at the nape of his neck, earning me a deep primal growl from within his chest. I can feel the slick heat pooling between my legs and a fierce, deep ache within my womb. I need him to ease the ache; I want him to take me, carnally and animalistically. Like a lion claiming its mate, like a predator claiming its prey. I climb onto his lap and straddle him, my thighs trapping him between them. I run my fingers through his soft raven black hair and gently tug. I have missed every inch of this magnificent Adonis, who consumes my every waking thought and the man who still holds that vital missing puzzle piece from my heart.

  He pushes my cardigan down my shoulder to expose my skin, and his teeth latch onto the flesh between my neck and shoulder. I moan loudly as he bites and nips at me, then soothes the bite with a swift lick of his expert tongue. I start to unbutton his shirt, and I lean in to lick his exposed and heavily tattooed pec. I continue to unbutton his shirt to reveal his hard chest and ripped abs. His body never fails to bring me to my knees, but his perfection is marred by the heavily dressed wound on his shoulder. He chuckles throatily as he catches me ogling his body.

  "I need you, angel," he rasps as he pushes my cardigan off my other shoulder and lets it drop to the floor behind us.

  He reaches into my vest top and lowers the cup of my bra to allow him access to my full breast. The feel of his warm, calloused fingers against my breast has me pushing myself further into his hand. I reach back and cup his steel erection straining in his loose jeans. He moans loudly as I pop the button on his jeans.

  "Jesus, what the fuck are you doing to me, angel? You're unmanning me right here."

  His voice is barely a whisper, and I love how I still have the power to completely unravel him. I reach into his boxers and grasp his erection in my hand. He takes a sharp intake of breath as he suddenly grabs my hips. In a swift movement, I find myself pinned beneath him. His large wide frame eclipses my tiny one.

  "Hey."

  He smiles his wicked smile that screams trouble with a capital T. His green eyes are sparkling with pure lust and complete sin.

  "Hey yourself."


  He chuckles softly and pulls off his shirt. He is so smooth and sculpted. The defined, corded lines of his muscles remind me that he is powerful, dominant and has an element of danger lurking beneath his hard, perfect exterior. I lean up, pulling my top off, until I am lying in my bra beneath him.

  "God, look at you. You're so fucking perfect, angel," he says huskily, and I cock my eyebrow.

  "Have you seen yourself in the mirror lately? You're pretty fucking perfect."

  He laughs.

  "Perfect, huh? I'll have to remember that one, angel. I've had a lot of time on my hands; in between reading those trashy erotic romance books, I managed to fit in a few work out sessions."

  I laugh, as he flexes his muscles. He really is absolute male fucking perfection.

  He reaches into his boxers to fist his growing hard-on.

  "Now where were we, angel? I should put you over my knee for interrupting such an important moment," he coolly threatens, and I press my thighs together to create a delicious, friction, easing the ache between my legs.

  "Every orgasm you have from here on out is mine, angel. Do I make myself clear?" he says with a hint of warning, and I try to suppress my smirk as a reply.

  "Crystal clear," I say innocently, and he growls.

  "You test my fucking patience at every turn, angel. I'm trying to control myself, but you're slowly shredding it, piece-by-piece," he says through a clenched jaw.

  Boldly, I reach back to unfasten my bra and pull it off, so I am topless beneath him.

  "Sam, I need you," I say huskily.

  I am so overcome by lust, I pull him down until he crushes his weight against me and I wrap my legs around his waist. He pulls his boxers down, exposing his nine-inch member, which is now pierced, and I lick my lips at the sight.

  “You got your cock pierced?”

  He smirks and shrugs his shoulders.

  “Story for another time, angel. Let’s just say I lost another bet.”

  He winks mischievously, and I shimmy my jeans down my thighs. As he goes to shove forward to enter me, I hear Freddie's cry on the baby monitor.

  I sit bolt upright and lean back on my elbows, suddenly questioning what the fuck I am doing. I look up at Sam and shake my head.

  “I can’t do this Sam. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

  In silence, he lets me up from underneath him, and I grab my bra. I quickly start re-dressing, and Sam drops shirtless down onto the sofa, running his fingers through his already mussed hair. I pull on my top and rush quickly to the spare bedroom to Freddie. I push open the door, and Freddie’s wide watery green eyes find mine, instantly quieting him.

  “Hey baby boy, mummy’s here.”

  I reach down into his cot and pick him up.

  “Did you just want a cuddle? You just wanted a cuddle didn’t you, my gorgeous boy?”

  I coo and cuddle him closer to me.

  “Mummy is very silly, yes she is, she’s very, very fudging silly. Shall we go back to Uncle Remy now? Shall we?”

  He gurgles and clutches my top in his tiny fist. Unexpectedly, Sam appears in the doorway.

  “Just for the record, you’re not silly, angel; we both wanted that, no matter how much you fucking deny it.”

  Shit. The fucking baby monitor. He must have heard every word I said to Freddie.

  “I’m sorry, it shouldn’t have happened. I don’t know what came over me.”

  He leans his large frame against the doorjamb. He is still shirtless; his jeans are hanging open and riding low on his narrow hips. I lick my lips at the sight of him, and he smirks at my hormone-fuelled reaction to him.

  “Bullshit, angel. You forget how I know your body, and I also know when you’re lying,” he says huskily.

  “Look, don’t go, stay, at least for a little while longer.”

  He steps forward into the room and moves closer to me.

  “Logan isn’t going anywhere, please, just let me get to know my son.”

  He strokes Freddie’s cheek and Freddie giggles.

  “Hey, how’s daddy’s little rock star doing?”

  I hand Freddie to Sam, and his eyes grow heavy, as he snuggles his chubby face into Sam’s bare chest.

  “Is someone sleepy, buddy?”

  He perches on the edge of the bed, and I sit down on the blue and white striped chaise lounge that is in the corner of the room, observing the bond between father and son. A few minutes of awkward silence passes before his mesmerizing emerald eyes find mine and neither of us can look away. He breaks our stare as he looks down at Freddie, he is fast to sleep in Sam’s arms.

  “Must have the magic touch, angel.”

  He gets up slowly, goes over to Freddie’s cot, and lays him gently back down. He moves over to me and crouches down in front of me.

  “I was lost without you, angel, so fucking lost. I was devastated. All I felt was pure fucking rage at the person who did this to you, to us. That fucking person was right under my god damn nose the entire time, and I didn’t even know! How could I not have fucking known!” he grits out and squeezes his eyes shut, as if to rid himself of a terrible memory.

  He takes my hand in his.

  “We have a second chance, angel; please don’t write that off, don’t run from me again. You made me a promise once, that you wouldn’t run.”

  His voice sounds so tortured, it crushes me to hear him so full of anguish and regret.

  “We were...happy, blissfully so. It was...all consuming. I loved you so much. I felt like I couldn’t fucking breathe without you, Sam. I’ve never been that dependent on a man ever, not until you.”

  I let out a shaky breath as I remember what we once had, and my eyes lock with his. There is that familiar electricity between us, it never went away.

  “There were times where I...I would think how lucky I was to have such an amazing man in my life. I would get the butterflies in my stomach every time I was within touching distance of you, and I counted down the hours until I could see you again. I was...fucking addicted to you...you were like a drug I couldn’t get enough of. I was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. Do you know what that felt like? What we had...it was a once in a lifetime thing, and I’m not sure we can ever get back to that, Sam.”

  I swipe the tears angrily from my eyes.

  “You fucking intoxicate me, angel. From the first moment I met you. I can’t breathe without you either. I’m a mess, I can’t sleep, and I can barely drag myself out of bed in the morning. This past year has been my own personal fucking hell. I’ve just been going through the motions, pretending to live and I let my alter ego take the reins on my sorry life. My life sucks without you, angel.”

  I bite my lip to stifle the laugh bubbling up in my chest. He cocks his pierced eyebrow and flashes that adorable, dimpled smirk I have missed so much.

  “Yeah, so I’m quoting Kelly Clarkson. I’m officially a fucking pussy.”

  He smirks wickedly, gets to his feet and offers me his large tattooed hand.

  “Dance with me, angel. Let me prove to you that what happened back there wasn’t a mistake.”

  He pulls me up, and soft strains of music start to play in the background. He leads me out of the room, closing the door gently behind us, until we are back in the living room. I recognise the song as ‘Slow Dancing in a Burning Room’ by John Mayer. The slow sensual beat of the song begins, and he pulls me close to him, until I am pinned to his hard chest. He starts to move until we are slowly and silently swaying on the spot, with my hand in his and his other hand on my hip. My heart beat starts to quicken, and the look in his eyes is smouldering. He leans down and kisses me passionately on the lips. The feel of his soft lips on mine coaxes my mouth open, and his tongue strokes mine. His kiss is so tender and so gentle that it makes me want to weep. He pulls me tighter to him, and I deepen the kiss, not wanting it to end. John croons in the background as Sam pulls away from our kiss. His breathing is ragged, and his green eyes are blazing.

  “Stay with me, angel,” he sa
ys gruffly. "Just give me tonight; I can have Cole take you both back to the hotel first thing in the morning."

  I snuggle closer to his hard chest, and he squeezes me tighter.

  “You don’t have to answer now, please just think about it. Stay and let me show you how much I need you. Let me love you, angel.”

  I sigh deeply, feeling so relaxed and content in his arms that I don’t realise what I have said until I feel Sam tense in my arms.

  “I never realised how much I missed this. I spoke to my mum, and I told her I made a huge mistake. I was so wrong; I never should have stayed away, Sam.”