He leaned back on his headrest. “Let’s call it a night. Maybe tomorrow will be better.”
I agreed and dropped him off at his house. I drove home, ready to be done with the day. Ready to be done with Lucas and my stupid obsession. I got out of my car and slung my backpack over my shoulder. I knew just the thing that would make it all better.
I tromped to my backyard and over to the fire pit. I opened my backpack and rummaged through. This was it. I was officially over Lucas, and I would burn my notebook to prove it.
“Hannah!” My brother appeared around the side of the house, running toward me. “You’re home!”
My first instinct was to say something sarcastic, but I held back. I hadn’t been very nice to him lately. So, I just smiled. “Yeah.”
“Want to play a game with me?”
No. I didn’t. But I knew he’d pester me if I said no. “Okay. In just a minute.”
“Can we play Tumblin’ Monkeys?”
“Yes.” I shoved the books around in my backpack, not paying much attention to Travis anymore. My notebook wasn’t in there. I checked a third time while Travis whooped and ran back inside. I seriously couldn’t find it.
My heart stopped. I had left it at the library. Oh, no. This wasn’t good at all. That notebook had Lucas’s name all over it. It was covered in hearts. I had written some pretty embarrassing things in there. What if someone found it?
I ran inside the house. “Dad! I have to run back to school for something.”
He came around the corner, a kitchen towel in his hands. “You forgot some homework?”
“Just a notebook I need.” I clutched my backpack, my heart racing, and I prayed I wouldn’t be too late.
“No! You said you’d play with me,” Travis said, pouting.
“I will. I’ll be right back, okay?”
Travis wasn’t happy, but he nodded. “Okay.”
I ran to the garage and pulled my car out. As I raced to the school, I prayed that somehow the library would be unlocked and my notebook would be sitting at the table, undisturbed.
I parked in the gravel lot, thankful to see some band students milling about. I ran to the doors and yanked, but they were locked. One of the girls turned to me. “Everything’s already locked down.”
“I have to get inside.”
She shrugged. “We just got out of band practice. Wait to see if anyone else comes out. You can get in then.”
I nodded and placed my hands up to the glass to see if I could see anyone inside. Luckily, I only had to wait a minute before another couple of students headed toward the doors. As soon as they pressed the bar and opened the door, I grabbed ahold of it and held it open for them. They nodded at me and I slipped inside the darkened school.
I ran toward the library, my footsteps echoing in the empty hallway. I got to the door and pulled. Disappointment crashed into me as the door didn’t budge. It was locked. Of course. I pressed my nose against the glass and tried to see the table we were sitting at.
Empty.
My heart raced. The table was clean. Did that mean I hadn’t left my notebook after all? Or that someone had already picked it up? Maybe I had just thought it was in my backpack, but really, I had left it at home?
My spirits lifted. I had stuck it in my room at one point, hidden so Travis couldn’t find it and ask what it was. Maybe it was still there. I started down the hallway, my spirits finally lifted. I probably was just mistaken that I had it with me. That had to be it.
At least, that’s what I was going to tell myself so I didn’t freak out over losing it.
Chapter Sixteen
Something was off between me and Parker, and I had been trying all week to get him to spill it, but he wasn’t talking, and now the week was over. It put me in a sour mood. Plus, I still couldn’t find my notebook, and it bugged me.
Tripping over a mound of clothes on my floor, I caught myself before I face planted. I seriously needed to do laundry. With a huff, I grabbed the laundry basket from the corner and stuffed dirty clothes in it. By the time I was done, it was almost too heavy for me to lift. Yeah, I was insanely lazy.
I carried the basket down the stairs, trying not to fall or drop the heavy load. Travis was in the kitchen, talking to my dad, as I slipped down to the laundry room. I shoved all my dark clothes in with a scoop of detergent and pressed the button to start the cycle.
I ran up the stairs and grabbed my backpack. “Bye, Dad,” I called as I rushed to the garage. The clock wasn’t my friend today, and I didn’t want to be late for school. I pushed the garage door opener and waited for the door to lift. This week had been so crappy, I just wanted it over. At least my wish would come true. Finally, it was Friday.
I pulled up in front of Parker’s house and did a double take. His ruined grandma car was gone, and a red sports car sat in the driveway instead. I stared at it. Whose car was that? It had out-of-state license plates. Surely Parker hadn’t purchased it.
Parker came out of his house and joined me in the car. I turned to him. “What’s with the nice car?”
“It’s my aunt’s.” He met my gaze. “She’s going to be staying with us for a while.”
I knew what Parker wasn’t saying, and emotion swelled in me. She was there to get his mother some help. I blinked back tears. “That’s the best news.”
He reached out and touched my arm. Warmth spread over my skin. I looked down at his hand on my arm. He hadn’t touched me in days. I’d missed it. Before I could say anything, he let go and pulled his hand back, his expression guarded. “Anyway, just thought I’d say thank you.”
“Of course.”
I drove to school, silence filling the car. Parker slipped back into the role he’d taken with me all week. The one where he was distant with me. It was like he was building an invisible wall between us. I hated it.
After I parked the car, I turned to him. “Listen,” I said, tapping the steering wheel. “I know something is going on with you. And I know you don’t want to talk about it. But this…” I motioned the space between us. “It’s killing me.”
He flinched as if my words caused him pain. “Hannah…”
“Please. Just tell me.”
His gaze grew intense. “Do you trust me?”
Without hesitation, I answered. “Yes.”
“Then just wait. Everything will work out.”
I needed to know Parker was going to talk to me. To make it all better. “You’ll tell me what’s going on with you?”
“You’ll find out. At the dance.”
“Tomorrow?”
He nodded, a small smile crossing his lips. “Tomorrow.”
Relief came over me and I grinned. I could wait until tomorrow. Then Parker could talk things out with me and everything would go back to how it was. “Okay.”
He exited the car but didn’t wait for me. I rushed to catch up to him so we could walk into the school together. Since things were weird between us, I wasn’t sure where things stood. “Are we doing anything tonight?” I asked, breathless from trying to keep up with him.
He looked at me with that same sad expression he’d carried all week. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
He worked his jaw. “I have something I have to do.”
“All right, then. Since your car is busted, am I picking you up for the dance?”
“No. I’ll pick you up.” He took a step back from me. “Be ready by seven.”
A weight settled in my stomach. “We’re not going to the dinner theater beforehand?”
He stopped walking and turned to me. “I can’t,” he whispered. His gaze held pain, and I longed to take it from him. I vowed I would. As soon as he let me in.
I almost reached up to touch his face and plead with him again but held back. I needed to be there for him, even if he wasn’t sharing with me whatever was upsetting him. I swallowed my own selfish disappointment and nodded. “All right. Pick me up at seven.”
Parker turned from me and walked into the building.
I stared after him, my own emotions swirling inside of me. He said he would talk to me at the dance. Then we would be fine.
I held onto that hope as the day progressed, my body feeling lifeless. I needed Parker like I needed air. And right now, I was struggling to breathe.
Chapter Seventeen
I twirled in front of my bedroom mirror, the skirt of the red dress swirling out. I loved the dress even more, if that were possible. I had worked on the stain for over an hour last night, but it was not going anywhere. But luckily, my plan B was working perfectly. The cropped cardigan covered it and looked amazing with the dress.
I had spent extra time on my hair, pulling it up into an updo, and even put on a little makeup for the evening. There were no swimming pools in the gym. I was safe from that disaster.
As I worked on the few tendrils of hair I had allowed to fall with my curling iron, Travis came running into my room. He looked up at me. “What are you doing?”
“Getting ready for the dance.”
“Are you going with Parker?”
“Yep.”
“Do you love him?” Travis stretched out the word love, so it sounded like two words. Then he giggled incessantly, jumping back when I tried to swipe my hand over his hair.
“No.” I scoffed. “It’s Parker.”
Travis stopped giggling. “Do you like him, then?”
“Of course, I like him. We’re best friends.”
“Do you want to kiss him?” Travis’s innocent eyes stared up at me, and I balked.
The memory of us standing in front of the school flashed into my head, and Parker’s words came rushing back. I’ll kiss you. But I want you to do something for me in return.
My throat closed at the memory of Parker standing so close, his lips almost touching mine. And his next words sent a chill through me. Kiss me back.
I staggered back from my mirror, the curling iron now smelling too warm on my hair. I quickly released my curl and unplugged it from the wall.
“Do you?” Travis asked, his eyebrows knit together. “Want to kiss him?”
“No.” I said it, but I wasn’t sure I meant it.
Travis must have picked up on that, because he made kissing noises with his lips as he left my room. “Parker and Hannah sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G.”
“Shut up!” I yelled after him, but it was useless. He was long gone.
The doorbell chimed and my heart leapt. Parker was here to pick me up. I took one last look in the mirror before slipping on my shoes and hurrying to the door. But my father beat me to it. As I came down the stairs, Parker and my father both stood in the entryway looking up at me.
“Wow, honey, you look great,” my father said.
Parker held an expression I couldn’t read. He wore a black suit with a red tie, and he looked like he could go get a leading role in Hollywood. His hair flopped down over his forehead in that way I loved, and his lips curved into a small smile. I gripped the banister and continued down carefully so I didn’t trip and fall.
As I approached, he held out a wrist corsage. It was a simple white rose with a red ribbon that matched my dress. My breath hitched as he slid it on, his fingers grazing my skin. The sensations came immediately, the weak knees and hammering of my heart, and tingles that felt like fire skittering across my skin. Our gaze connected and I couldn’t deny it any longer. I had a major crush on my best friend.
He held out his arm and I looped mine through his. My father stood back, his phone raised. “Smile for the camera.”
“Dad,” I whined, but secretly I wanted a picture of us. I wanted to remember this night. To remember how Parker was making me feel at that moment.
My dad snapped a few shots then waved us out the door. “Okay, you kids. Go have fun.”
Before we got outside, my dad pulled Parker aside and whispered something into his ear. Parker’s face flushed, but he nodded and my father let him go. After we got outside, I nudged him. “What did he say?”
“He threatened me with bodily harm if I did anything to hurt you.”
I gaped at him. “He did not.”
Parker grinned at me. “All right, the bodily harm was implied.”
I swatted his arm. “You tease.”
He reached down to open the door for me, and that’s when I realized he had brought his aunt’s car. I climbed into the seat and whistled. “This is fancy.”
“It’s a Ferrari.”
I didn’t know much about cars, but that one I knew, and it wasn’t cheap. “Dang. Your aunt must have money.”
He slid into the driver’s seat and started the engine. “Yeah. I had no idea.”
The tension from earlier in the week seemed to be lighter, and I relaxed into my seat. We chatted about surface things while he drove to our school. By the time he’d parked, it was almost like old times again.
He helped me out of the car and I hooked my hand on his arm again. I looked up at the stars as we walked. “It’s such a clear evening.”
“Yes.”
“It was nice of your aunt to let you drive her car.”
He ducked his head. “She wanted me to be able to have a proper date.” He chuckled, but it sounded forced. “I didn’t try to set her straight.”
Something about the way he said it made me sad. He was right, though. This wasn’t a proper date. This was a sham. One I had set up to get Lucas. But now all that had changed, and I no longer wanted him.
I wanted Parker.
All kinds of emotions swelled in me. Embarrassment for how I had acted around Lucas. Excitement for tonight. Nervousness because I wanted to tell Parker that I liked him in that way, but I wasn’t sure how. Anxiousness because he could shatter me if he told me he didn’t return my feelings.
He opened the door to the gym for me and I stepped in. Twinkle lights and red tulle hung from the ceiling. A slow song started and couples crowded the gym, holding each other and swaying to the music. Parker leaned in close. “I’ll be right back.”
He slipped away before I had a chance to ask him where he was going. It struck me as odd, but I didn’t dwell on it. Maybe he had to pee. I walked along the wall, trying not to look too dumb being alone at the dance.
As I walked, my peripheral vision picked up movement toward me. Tasha and her flock were headed my direction. At first, I thought maybe they were going around me so I stepped aside, but they stopped in front of me.
Tasha sneered and pointed at my dress. “Look at this. I can’t believe this.”
“What?” I looked down, trying to figure out what had her panties all in a wad. I couldn’t see anything. Why was Tasha making a big deal out of my dress?
She grabbed my sweater and pulled it open, revealing the stain. “This totally is my dress. You can see where I spilled coffee on it.” The other girls laughed, and people started crowding around to see what was going on.
My entire body heated in embarrassment and I wanted to melt into a puddle. This dress had been Tasha’s? How did I not know this? Probably because I never went to the dances. I was a social hermit, and this was exactly the reason why. Every stupid thing I had done over the past two weeks just embarrassed me more. I never should have tried to leave the house. Tried to be part of the crowd. I was the invisible one, and I should have stayed that way.
“I guess we now know where you shop. The sloppy seconds store.” Tasha doubled over with laughter.
I yanked my sweater out of her hand and wrapped it tightly around myself. I wanted to sink into the floor. Sink into invisibility again.
The crowd parted and Parker shoved his way through. His eyes narrowed and he reminded me of a bull who was about to charge. “What’s going on here?”
Tasha grinned. “Nothing. We’re just admiring your date’s dress. My dress. I guess that’s the risk you run shopping at the sloppy seconds store.”
Parker’s hands clenched, his knuckles white. “You already said that one. What’s the matter, Tasha? Can’t come up with more than one joke?”
&
nbsp; She turned to him, her smile now gone. “At least I don’t shop at thrift stores.”
“No, you overpay for the exact same thing.” Parker folded his arms, and several people in the crowd snickered.
Tasha’s face flamed. “I don’t wear other people’s clothes.”
Parker paused, looking her over. Then he pointed to her. “Isn’t that the skirt Kelly wore to school last week?”
I wanted to scream with joy. Tasha looked horrified that anyone would have noticed. “I…uh…”
The crowd laughed and Parker took my hand, pulling me away from everyone. “Bye, Tasha,” he called. When we were out of earshot, he chuckled. “What do you want to bet she never wears that skirt again?”
I laughed, then I threw my arms around his neck. “You’re the best.” Before I could think, I kissed him.
He stiffened for a split second then kissed me back, but it was reserved. Distant. Very different from the kiss we’d had a few days ago, when he’d asked me to kiss him back, and I was disappointed. I pulled away as one of my favorite songs came on. “Let’s dance.”
He hesitated, and I suddenly grew nervous he would say no, but he took my hand and slowly led me out to the dance floor.
His hand slid behind me to the small of my back and pulled me close. I took his other hand in mine, his touch once again sending all kinds of electricity through me. We started moving to the slow dance song playing over the loudspeakers.
I leaned in close to him, the smell of his cologne making me want to inhale deeply. I closed my eyes, unable to think as my senses overwhelmed me. All I wanted was to stay in his arms forever.
Parker was amazing. Why had I not seen it before now? Of course, I knew he was awesome because we’d been friends. But why had I not seen the potential for so much more? Why had I been obsessed with some fantasy, when reality was standing right before my eyes?
I snuggled into his chest. He leaned down and kissed the top of my head. Hope soared in me. If Parker could treat me so tenderly, it was possible he was starting to feel the same way toward me. Maybe my crush on him wouldn’t ruin everything. Maybe he and I could be real.
Falling for My Best Friend Page 9
