by Kat Mizera
“I am. I just don’t know what…yet.”
“That’s okay, darling.” She ran her hand along his cheek. “I’m proud of the man you are—you don’t have a career, but you work hard, you pay your own bills, you’re respectful and kind, honest… and sometimes that’s more important than fancy titles or big paychecks.”
Sebastian smiled. “Big paychecks are nice, though.”
“It will come.”
“Do you want me to talk to Papa?”
“What? No. Goodness, it’s not a big deal. I’ll sort things out with him.” She forced herself to smile. “Don’t worry about me.”
“You’re lonely and it’s not right he leaves you at home every night.”
“I’m a grown woman. I choose to stay at home every night.” She stared off into the distance. “That might change soon, however.”
“Good for you.”
4
Wills was late getting home that evening, so Anya was dressed and ready to leave just as he walked in. She wore a pair of jeans that clung to her still trim figure, a V-neck top that accentuated her slender neck and high-heeled boots that made her taller than her husband. She’d done her hair and makeup and was putting on lipstick as he came in. He looked at her in surprise for a moment, and then slowly narrowed his gaze.
“Where are you going?” he asked, scowling.
“Out.” She put the lipstick in her purse and walked towards the door.
“Anya!” Wills barked out her name.
She turned slowly, raising her eyebrows. “Yes?”
“You won’t tell me where you’re going?”
“You were out until almost dawn last night,” she said quietly. “And you didn’t tell me where you were going.”
His ruddy face reddened. “We’d quarreled. I was just over at Harry’s.”
“Yes, but you didn’t tell me. You didn’t even send a text so I wouldn’t worry.” She reached for the door knob.
“Is there dinner?”
“If you choose to fetch some. Otherwise, there are leftovers.” She stepped onto the porch, car keys in her hand.
“Anya!”
“Bloody hell, Wills, what is it?” she snapped back.
He hesitated. “I’m sorry I didn’t call last night,” he said after a moment. “It was rude—I was angry but I didn’t think you’d worry. That wasn’t my intent.”
“We’ve been together twenty-nine years and you didn’t think I’d worry?” She blinked and shook her head. “I don’t even know you anymore, Wills. How could you think that of me? You were out, possibly drinking—you could have been lying dead in the road somewhere… we have a family, a life, together! You think so little of me because we quarreled?”
“I apologize,” he said tightly. “But things haven’t been the same and I thought…” He cleared his throat. “Anyway. Will you tell me where you’re going?”
She frowned. “I believe it’s called Deluxe, or Luxe…some such thing. It’s a night club. Where Sebastian works. I saw him this afternoon and he said I should come, that tonight is 80s night and I might enjoy the music. Being the old woman that I am.” She smiled in spite of herself.
“I see.”
“Anyway, leftovers in the refrigerator if you like. I’ll be home early.” She quietly shut the door behind her and walked to the car. She’d never had a problem with them sharing it before, but tonight it had irked her. Karl had offered to buy her one for her birthday one year but she’d laughed, saying she had no need for it. Now she was reconsidering.
“Anya, wait.” Wills stood on the porch looking down at her.
She paused, watching his face as he struggled to think of what to say.
“We can’t go on this way,” he said finally.
“I’ve tried,” she responded. “It’s you who seems to think that something has changed.”
“It’s not changed,” he growled, throwing up his hands. “It’s always been this way, you favoring Karl, you thinking you’re better than us.”
“Better than you?” She stared at him. “What on earth are you talking about?”
“Look at you!” he said. “You’re beautiful, even after nearly thirty years, you still take my breath away.”
“Thank you,” she said quietly. “But considering you’ve not touched me in months, I find that a little hard to believe.”
“The distance between us…you should’ve married him. You should be married to a rich NHL player, not an uneducated fisherman. You should have bright, successful children and—”
“I do have bright, successful children,” she said, anger surging through her. “You’re the one who looks down on the twins. Not me, you! Sebastian is still finding himself—some people take longer. And Em is married now, a mum herself—a career isn’t for everyone. Why do you look at Karl as the standard? The percentage of men who can play professional sports is less than one percent. Karl worked very, very hard to achieve that level of athleticism…and there may have been some luck involved as well, but that doesn’t happen for everyone.”
“It happened for your son, though, didn’t it?”
“My son?” She cocked her head. “Not our son?”
He shrugged. “He’s involved with his father now, isn’t he?”
“He spoke to him, yes.”
“Did you?”
“Did I speak to Ken?” She just stared at him. “Of course not. When would I have spoken to him? You see the phone bills! Wills, what’s wrong with you? What could possibly have made you so jealous and insecure? I’ve never looked at another man since the day I married you. Never!”
He nodded slowly, sadly. “I believe that. You always do the right thing, don’t you, Anya?”
“What does that mean?”
“Just what I said.” He rubbed his graying beard, pressing his lips together. “I don’t want you to go tonight. I’d like you to stay home.”
“Really.” She fixed him with an icy glare. “You’ve been out at the pubs at least three nights a week for months, and the first time I want to go somewhere suddenly you’d like me to stay home? I’m sorry, Wills. I made plans this evening. If you’d like me to stay home with you tomorrow night, I will.”
“No. That’s not what I asked. I asked you to stay home tonight.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m your husband.”
Anya shook her head. “I’m sorry, Wills. That’s not a good enough reason. Not anymore.”
“If you go, then I’ll be filing for divorce.”
Anya couldn’t help it; she laughed. “Really. Well, by all means, file for divorce because I chose to go out for the first time in over a year, rather than stay at home with you.” She started to get in the car.
“Is this what you want, Anya?” His eyes narrowed as he looked at her.
“No, but it’s obviously what you want.” She shut the car door, started the engine and backed out of the driveway. “Idiot,” she murmured under her breath as she drove down the street. Oddly, all she felt as she drove away was relief. It was time for her to take back control of her life. She’d given it up 29 years ago because of the child she’d carried, but her children were grown now. This was her time, and she wasn’t wasting another moment of it.
Simply Savannah
Las Vegas Sidewinders Book 6.8
1
The house was quiet when Zakk Cloutier got home. It was almost two in the morning and he’d been gone for over a week. The flight tonight had been delayed twice, and he was exhausted after playing five hockey games in eight days. His team, the Las Vegas Sidewinders, had been all over the west coast and he was happy to be home.
Taking the stairs two at a time, he quietly slipped into the master bedroom of the home he shared with his girlfriend, Tiff. He kicked off his shoes and moved into the walk-in closet as quietly as he could. He dropped his bag and hung up his suit before throwing his socks and shirt in the laundry basket. Padding into the bathroom, he brushed his teeth and leaned against the sink, stari
ng in the mirror. He was tired, staying up late every night talking to Tiff instead of sleeping, and then playing hard five of the eight days he’d been gone.
He’d hated leaving her, thirty-eight weeks pregnant at the time, but they hadn’t been going too far and the Sidewinders had been on a losing streak before Christmas; they’d needed him. He’d scored at least one goal in four of their five games on the trip, and they’d won all of those games. They’d lost tonight, though, and he took it personally because he’d been off his game. Tiff was now thirty-nine weeks pregnant, due any day, and though she didn’t complain, he knew she didn’t like being alone this late in her pregnancy.
Turning off the light, he made his way back downstairs. As he’d suspected, she was fast asleep in the family room, pillows surrounding her on the recliner. She was sitting up, her head lolled to one side, snoring softly. With an affectionate smile, he walked over to her and dropped to his knees beside her. He rested a hand on her stomach and leaned over to brush his lips across her forehead as her eyes fluttered open.
“You’re home,” she whispered sleepily.
“Sorry to wake you but I didn’t want you to wake up and think I didn’t get home.” He brushed his fingers across her cheek. “I’m going up to bed, okay?”
“Oh, me too,” she said softly. “I want to sleep next to you—I’ve missed you.” She held out her hand.
Instead of taking her hand, he got to his feet and slid one arm under her knees and the other behind her back, scooping her up.
“Zakk, I’m too heavy!” she protested.
He just laughed. “I’m two hundred and sixty-five pounds—I think I can carry your little hundred-and-forty-pound body!”
“One hundred and fifty-one,” she grunted in annoyance. At five-feet-eleven, even nine months pregnant, she carried the baby easily, but this was an uncomfortable time for her. Of course, at six feet, seven inches, Zakk carried her like she was nothing.
“Whatever,” he murmured, kissing the side of her face.
When they got to their room, he put her down gently and crawled in after her. She rolled to her side and he did the same, spooning her from behind. After a moment, his big hands moved to her lower back, where he knew she’d been having a lot of discomfort, and began to rub in slow circles. She let out a sigh of pleasure and he increased the pressure, using his thumbs to ease the knots along her lower back.
“I haven’t slept through the night since you’ve been gone,” she sighed.
“I know, baby.” He moved his hands up to her shoulders and could feel the tension in her neck. “A few more days and this will be over.”
“Mmm.” She sighed again, closing her eyes as he helped her relax. “I’m so ready to meet our little girl.”
“Me, too.” Zakk continued kneading her shoulders and neck and was aware almost instantly when she fell asleep; her whole body seemed to relax against him.
Wrapping one arm around her, he pulled her close. Watching her sleeping peacefully, he gently stroked her arm with his hand. As pregnant as she was, he still thought she was the most beautiful woman in the world. From the first time he’d seen her, a little less than three years ago, he’d been blown away. Her beauty was the first thing he’d noticed, of course, with her strawberry blond hair, sparkling hazel eyes and magnificent figure, but he’d soon become attracted to the woman inside too.
He’d never met a woman who could tell a dirty joke like she could, and though she’d been his coach’s wife at the time, he’d known he would ask her out if he ever got a chance. She was funny, sexy, a great mom and smart as hell too. He’d been shocked to discover she was getting a PhD in psychology, and they’d had a big party when her dissertation was accepted. Of course, her husband had died of a heart attack just two months later and it had nearly killed him to wait six months before asking her out. The good part of that was that they’d had a chance to become good friends first, and once they’d started sleeping together he’d known immediately that he would love this woman forever.
They would already be married if it was up to him, but her unexpected pregnancy the first month they’d been together made her uncomfortable and she wanted to wait. She was also still a little nervous about being six years older than he was, but he didn’t care. She would be thirty-two this summer and he would turn twenty-six in the fall, but he truly didn’t even notice the numbers. She worried about getting fat and stretch marks, but he thought she was about as perfect as any woman could be, and that was saying a lot for a guy who’d had any number of women available to him any time. Being a star player for the Sidewinders afforded him a lot of attention, but he hadn’t noticed anyone else after he’d started spending time with Tiff; he loved this woman more than life itself.
With one hand on her stomach where their daughter rested, he was just about to drift off when Tiff moved. She rolled onto her back and slid her hand along his hip.
“You okay, babe?” he whispered in the darkness.
“I need you,” she whispered back. Her hand moved to his face, cupping his cheek and he dipped his head.
“You’ve been so uncomfortable…” His lips hovered over hers.
“We haven’t had sex in almost a month,” she complained, wrapping her arms around his neck. “And once I have her, it’ll be weeks… please, Zakk?”
He chuckled, “Baby, you don’t have to ask me twice, but I don’t want to hurt you—or the baby.”
“You won’t.” She turned towards him, her body molding against his. He was so strong and hard, a professional athlete who honed his craft every day, whether it was at the gym lifting weights, running five miles when he got up in the morning or on the ice. She was often mesmerized by his washboard abs and broad shoulders; she liked the gold ring that pierced his left nipple as well.
“I’ve missed you,” he whispered, his lips on her neck.
“Me, too.” She smiled in the darkness. Despite her big belly, she couldn’t wait to feel his hands all over her.
When Zakk’s mouth covered hers, she sighed happily, digging her fingers into his long blond hair. His tongue found hers with slow, deliberate strokes while his hands slid under the T-shirt she wore to explore her creamy skin. He loved touching her, and her pregnancy wasn’t a deterrent to him at all. In fact, the idea that she was carrying their child made him hotter than ever. It had been killing him not to be able to make love to her the last few weeks.
“Zakk…” Her voice was breathy as she leaned into him.
“I got you, baby,” he said quietly. “I’m kinda nervous, though. You’re really pregnant—I feel like I’m going to hurt her.”
She chuckled lovingly, reaching a hand up to touch his face. “That makes me fall in love with you all over again.” she smiled. “But I promise it’s fine. You can’t hurt her unless you’re putting all your weight on my stomach. Making love is safe.”
“I know that in my head,” he said. “But my dick is still terrified.”
She turned and lay flat on her back so she could look up at him. “I’ve been pregnant before—I know my body and I’m fine. Make love to me, Zakk.”
Tiff woke up alone in bed and felt a moment of panic before remembering that Zakk was home and undoubtedly had gotten up with the twins. She reached for her phone and saw that it was late, so she struggled to her feet and padded into the bathroom. Hopefully, Zakk had taken the boys to school because she didn’t have the energy to chase them these days. She’d changed them from the three-day-a-week program to the five-day program because she needed the break and would need it even more when the baby came.
Carefully going down the stairs, she heard Zakk on the phone and padded up behind him quietly.
“—don’t think so,” he was saying. “I’ve been gone eight days and Tiff’s due date is today. I’m not going anywhere… nah, Coach knows. Okay. I’ll see you later.” He disconnected and smiled at her. “Good morning, Beautiful.”
“Good morning.” She wrapped her arms around him and he held her against hi
s chest.
“How are you feeling?” he asked softly.
“Okay,” she nodded. “I slept well, which helps.”
“You’re full term now, right? When do you see the doctor?”
“Friday,” she said. “If nothing happens over the weekend, she’ll probably want to induce on Monday.”
He nodded. “Our next game is Saturday here at home, which is perfect.”
She nodded. “Unless I go into labor Friday or Saturday.”
He grinned. “I can miss a game to stay with you. I’m so excited. I never thought I’d be this excited to be a dad.”
“I’ll be more excited when I can see my feet again,” she laughed.
He pulled her up against him and kissed her, his hands automatically going to her stomach. He was rewarded with a firm kick from the baby, and he looked down in surprise. “She’s active today.”
“She’s been less active this week,” Tiff said, also looking down. “Which is why I think she’s coming soon. Not much room in there for her anymore.”
He pressed his forehead against hers. “Are you scared?” His eyes met hers worriedly. Although she’d gone through this before, this was his first time and he didn’t want her to know how nervous he was.
“Not scared,” she shrugged. “I know what to expect and I’m all about good drugs, but there are always things that can go wrong.”
“I’ll be with you every step of the way.” He brushed his thumb across her cheek.
“I know.” She rested her head on his chest.
“What are you going to do today?” he asked.
“Nothing until you pick up the twins from school!” she laughed. “What are you going to do?”
“I’m going to work out and then get the car seats installed.” They’d gotten two car seats at her shower a few weeks ago but he hadn’t been home long enough to put them in.
“Okay.” She moved away reluctantly and went to the refrigerator. “I’m going to eat something and get in the shower. Go work out.”
