by Scott King
Timing Is Everything:
We’ve covered how characters have multiple wants and how those wants can tie into a theme of a story. In “The Mirror of Erised,” Rowling decides to lay it all out, revealing both Harry’s and Ron’s deepest wants, in case anyone missed them.
Ron feels overshadowed by his older brothers and thus his wants to excel and outshine them. Harry, who has never had a real family, wants to have his biological family back.
It’s not a coincidence that Rowling planned for Harry to see the mirror and his family on Christmas. It’s perfect timing. Christmas, traditionally, is the time you spend with families and loved ones. The majority of U.S. and U.K. readers would know and understand that. By having these events play out on Christmas it maximizes the sympathy the reader feels for Harry.
Rowling is cruel, in a good way. She lets Harry have a sweet Christmas. He spends it with people who actually care about him, and he gets real presents. Not just presents that imply monetary value, but presents that make him feel loved and a part of something special. Right as everything is warm and fuzzy, Rowling hits the reader and Harry with the reflection of his parents. By contrasting the warmth of Christmas, with the heartbreak of Harry being an orphan, it makes both stand out. Christmas feels even more warm and the pain of Harry not knowing his parents feels even sadder.
There isn’t another holiday that would have worked as well as Christmas. Rowling could have used Thanksgiving, except that’s not a U.K. holiday. Halloween appears earlier in the novel, but Harry seeing his parents on Halloween would be more creepy and eerie than heart-breaking.
When planning out your novel, you’ll need to question when to reveal or do certain things to your characters and the answer is usually “wherever it maximizes what I’m trying to do.”
Albus Dumbledore:
Up until now, the reader has only gotten a few glimpses at Dumbledore. There was the opening chapter when Harry was delivered to the Dursleys. He spouted a few words of wisdom and joked at the opening feast. Otherwise, he has not been around. The way people talk about him, it’s easy to know that Dumbledore is powerful as well as respected. It’s clear that he has a sense of humor, but beyond that, he’s a mystery.
When Dumbledore talks one on one with Harry, he is different from the Dumbledore that addresses the school. It’s a much more sincere, like a mentor. He’s also straightforward, or at least appears to be so, controlling the information as if it were a weapon. Early in the conversation, he says to Harry, “I don’t need a cloak to be invisible.” He implies that he knows a lot more about what is going on and is well aware of what both Harry and Ron saw in the mirror. He also makes it clear that he knows about Harry’s cloak. When dropping these truths on Harry, Dumbledore isn’t showy, trying to impress Harry. He also doesn’t talk down to Harry.
He warns Harry that the mirror has been hidden somewhere else and he wanted Harry to understand how it worked so that if Harry ever encountered it again he would be prepared. Dumbledore even says, “It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live, remember that.”
Why does Dumbledore have this conversation with Harry? Why does he explain to Harry how the mirror works? Obviously, it had to happen for plot reasons. Harry needs to understand the mirror so that when it shows up in the novel’s climax he can overcome it. As we talked in the last chapter, that’s not good enough. There needs to be a character-driven reason for such things or they end up feeling forced. The only other thing that makes sense then is that Dumbledore told Harry all he did because he expected Harry to go after the secret item that was held in vault 713 and he wants Harry to be able to retrieve it. So why did Dumbledore want Harry to go after the item? A brief answer is given later in the novel by Harry, but no real answer is given by Dumbledore.
Like the mystery of exactly how Harry survived Voldemort’s attack, Dumbledore and his motives will remain hidden till later books. When planning a series, sometimes information has to be held back. Sometimes things have to be set-up not just for the current book, but for later novels.
When done right, like the eventual reveal of Ron’s pet rat, Scabbers, it seems masterful and thrills readers. When done wrong, it frustrates readers and erodes the trust a reader has in an author. The reason the lack of clarity in Dumbledore’s motives works in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone is because Dumbledore himself is a mystery. His role touches upon the plot in this novel, but he is not a main character. He is an enigma that Rowling teases over the whole series and it’s not until the later books that he is really revealed.
Pulling something off like the character of Dumbledore takes skill and the right kind of character. His meddling, by revealing the mirror to Harry, is borderline deus ex machina and if Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone was a stand-alone novel, it would make the resolution feel forced. By having Dumbledore appear nearly all-powerful, having his motives unclear, and by having his meddling be subtle, the reader is able to accept it without questioning too much. If they do question it, it merely becomes another mystery that most likely will be revealed in a later book.
Chapter Twelve Takeaways:
•When creating scenes that are meant to be emotional, make sure you time them to maximize their impact.
•Not all answers to every mystery have to be revealed by the end of a novel, but be aware that if you hold back too much it will leave your readers unsatisfied.
•Building trust with your readers will allow them to look past any minor plot problems or smaller mysteries.
Chapter Thirteen
Nicolas Flamel
Chapter Summary:
The search for any information about Nicolas Flamel continues with no luck. If that wasn’t bad enough, Harry learns that Snape will referee his next Quidditch game. While pondering how to deal with the Snape, Neville hops into the room. His legs are stuck together, caught in a leg-locking curse.
Malfoy had put the curse on Neville. After freeing him of it, Hermione, Ron, and Harry tell Neville that he needs to stand up for himself. They remind him that the Sorting Hat put him in Gryffindor for a reason. To cheer him up, Harry gives Neville a Chocolate Frog. Neville eats the candy, but gives the card back to Harry because it is Albus Dumbledore and he already has Dumbledore.
Harry reads the back of the card and spots Nicolas Flamel’s name, realizing that the reason it looked so familiar was because he had read the same card while on the Hogwarts Express. With the new lead, Hermione retrieves a book from her room. In it, they discover that Flamel created an object called the Sorcerer’s Stone that can convert any metal into pure gold. As a side effect, it also produces a magical elixir that can make a person immortal as long as they regularly drink it. It’s clear to them then that Fluffy is guarding the stone.
Despite Snape’s involvement, the Quidditch match goes well, and Harry catches the Snitch within minutes, putting Gryffindor in the lead for the House Cup. After the game, Harry follows Snape and overhears him talking to Quirrell. Snape bullies Quirrell, demanding whether or not Quirrell has discovered how to defeat Fluffy and can get to what the three-headed dog is guarding.
The Sorcerer’s Stone:
The best thing about the reveal and the events of this chapter is that they are all misdirection. They are meant to further the mystery and distract the reader from solving the big twist that will happen in the final chapter of the novel.
What was in vault 713 is finally revealed. Inside was the magical Sorcerer’s Stone which can change metal to gold and can make a person immortal. Now the stone is hidden in Hogwarts and being protected by Fluffy.
The pay-off about what Hagrid retrieved from Gringotts feels satisfying. Considering the mystery of what was in the package was introduced in Chapter 5, “Diagon Alley,” it was important for it to be huge. It had to feel big. It had to feel powerful. Other relics that might have worked would be something along the lines of the Holy Grail or Excalibur’s Sword. Anything short of a legendary magical item or spell would have left the p
ay-off feeling weak. Remember, the bigger a mystery and the longer it is drawn out, the bigger the payoff has to be.
The kids know Snape is after the stone, but the issue doesn’t feel too pressing and won’t feel like a big deal until two chapters from now. This is because the real mystery of what is going on isn’t revealed yet. That won’t happen until we get to Chapter 15, “The Forbidden Forest.” For now, it is enough to know that Snape is going after the stone, but they also have to figure out why. Motivation matters. Right now there are no stakes in play. Sure, Ron, Harry, and Hermione think Snape is evil, but there is no hint at what he will do with the stone.
By drawing such a heavy attention to Snape, it creates misdirection so that the reader doesn’t figure out what is really happening. They are too busy looking at Snape and the reveal of the stone to suspect something else is going on. This type of misdirection can be used in all books, no matter the genre.
Neville Longbottom:
Neville is a screw-up. He has been from the moment he is introduced and throughout the whole novel he constantly blunders into trouble. The very first time we meet him, he has lost his toad. His Gran sends him a magic device to help him remember because she knows he is a screw-up. He admits that his uncle threw him out of a window. He hurts himself flying. He’s also a target for Malfoy’s bullying. At this point, Neville comes off as pathetic.
It is a big deal in “Nicolas Flamel” when Harry, Ron, and Hermione give him a talking-to. They tell him that the only way to deal with a bully is to stand up to one. They also remind Neville that he is Gryffindor. The Sorting Hat put him into the House that is known for courage, which means that somewhere deep down, he has it in him to be able to defend himself.
The arc of empowerment that Neville goes through in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone is simple. It also shows how something so simple fleshes out a character, because the truth of the matter is, Neville really only exists as a plot device.
On the train, him losing his toad allows for the introduction of Hermione. On the Quidditch field, him losing his Remembrall is the catalyst that results in Harry joining the Quidditch team. Even in this chapter, the scene about his character growth is really just a way for Harry to discover who Nicolas Flamel is.
The results of Neville’s talking-to won’t become clear until the final chapters, but it’s important to remember that even this far along in the novel the supporting characters should have a life of their own. Sure they should impact the main plot or the growth of the main cast, but for them not to feel flat they need to have their own wants and needs.
Character Voice:
People talk differently depending on their age, education, where they are from, their life experience, and their personality. For example, someone in Texas might use the phrase “Are y’all fixing to go to the store?” while someone from Western Pennsylvania might say “Are yinz going to the store?” The two phrases use local dialect, but mean the same thing. Characters are the same way. Like real people, they should have distinct voices. If you covered up the name of who was speaking, you should still be able to tell who the character is.
Here are some direct quotes from Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone. After reading thirteen chapters, you should be able to easily guess who is speaking:
1) “Oh, she got a letter just like that and disappeared off to that--that school--and came home every vacation with her pockets full of frog spawn, turning teacups into rats. I was the only one who saw her for what she really was--a freak!”
2) “I’d be careful if I were you Potter… Unless you’re a bit politer you’ll go the same way as your parents. They didn’t know what was good for them either. You hang around with riffraff like the Weasleys and that Hagrid, and it’ll rub off on you.”
3) “You’ll be g-getting all your equipment, I suppose? I’ve g-got to p-pick up a new b-book on vampires, m-myself.”
4) “Stop Lily an’ James Potter’s son goin’ ter Hogwarts! Yer mad.”
Answers from top to bottom spelled backwards: Yelsrud .Srm, Ocard, Llerriuq, Dirgah
Let’s start with the last two examples, because they are the most obvious. The one mentioning Harry’s parents has a distinct accent that no other character in the book uses. The second to last one includes stuttering and there is only one character that regularly stutters throughout the novel. These types of distinctions are an easy way to make a character sound different. They are also hard to do because if overused they will grate on the reader and become annoying. When crafting a character’s voice it is alright to make use of dialect and accents, but do so in a controlled and thought out way that doesn’t hinder the reader from understanding the dialog.
When reading the second example, you should have figured it out the moment you got to the word “Potter.” There is only one character in the novel who constantly uses the other character’s last names and when they do, it’s used to put the character in place, as if their very name is an insult. This says a lot about the speaker. The speaker feels like they are better than everyone else and that comes through in nearly everything they say.
The first example was a bit tricky, but from context alone, it should have been clear that muggle was speaking, and once you factor in the reference to sister and how the whole quote is said in a judgmental way it should have been clear who was speaking.
There are a ridiculous number of characters in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone and yet Rowling has managed to make each character sound distinct. Hermione often uses a teacherly tone that’s not meant to be condescending, but people still take it that way. George and Fred crack random jokes and have a hard time taking anything seriously. That’s what character voice is, and it’s important that the characters in your novel sound different.
Creating and hearing a character’s unique voice is one of those things that comes through practice and getting to know a character. If we asked you to write a speech in the voice of Thomas Jefferson, unless you happen to be a Jefferson scholar, you probably wouldn’t be able to do it. However, if we asked you to write a speech in the voice of your best friend or one of your family members, that’s something you most likely can do. Truly knowing a person means knowing how they think and speak and it’s that kind of intimacy you want to have with your characters.
Let’s pretend you create a character. We will say she is an eighty-year-old, white woman. She is ex-military and designed submarines for the Navy back in the day. Even now, decades after she’s retired, she won’t talk about her job because her work is still classified.
As an author, how would you decide what that woman’s voice was like? Well, you’d analyze her. We can tell from the brief description that the woman is smart. We know how women were treated back then and can guess she must be tough or at least have a thick skin. To figure out her voice, you would take everything that is her and try to imagine the world from her point of view. What words would she use to describe the things she sees and how would those words different from a character that is currently a high school student?
While making your way through the rest of the novel, pay more attention to how the characters speak. Notice how some characters use shorter sentences, and others seem to speak in nearly run-on sentences. Notice the word choices and how the tone suggests attitude and personality. The cast is huge and even so, Rowling is able to give each character their own voice.
Chapter Thirteen Takeaways:
•If you want to misdirect the reader away from something you are trying to keep hidden, you have to give them something big and flashy to look at.
•Even if a supporting cast member only exists to further the plot, they need to have their own wants and needs. Giving them a story or mini-arc is a great way to have them appear more fleshed out.
•Characters should have unique voices.
•A character’s background, intelligence, and personality all inform their voice and the word choices and the mechanics of how they speak make that voice clear.
Norbert the Norwegian Ridgeback
Chapter Summary:
It’s ten weeks from the end of the school year and Hermione is already stressing about exams because if they fail they won’t be admitted back for the second year. While studying in the library, they bump into Hagrid and ask about the Sorcerer’s Stone. He hushes them and tells them to stop by his hut so they can talk in private.
Ron reveals that Hagrid was looking up information about dragons. It is illegal to own dragons and Harry shares that Hagrid had always wanted to own one.
When they visit Hagrid’s he says that he doesn’t know what else guards the Sorcerer’s Stone, but knows that Sprout, Flitwick, McGonagall, Quirrell, Snape, and Dumbledore all set up spells, traps, and enchantments to guard it. While at Hagrid’s, Harry spots a giant egg. It’s a dragon egg!
At breakfast one morning soon after, Hagrid sends a note saying that the egg is hatching. Ron, Hermione, and Harry arrive in time to see the dragon be born, but are followed by Draco. A week passes and Draco sits on the secret, waiting for the best time to use it as a weapon. In the meantime, the dragon rapidly grows to the point that Hagrid eventually admits that they must get rid of it.
Ron sends a message to his older brother Charlie, who studies dragons. Charlie says he will send friends to pick up the dragon. For the exchange, they need to have the dragon on the tallest tower at midnight on Saturday. Using Harry’s cloak, they sneak the dragon to the tower. On the way, they hear McGonagall bust Draco for being out past curfew.
The handoff goes perfectly, and they are so excited by the success, that Harry forgets to use the invisibility cloak to get back to the dorm. On the way, they get busted by Filch.
