“I can relate to that. I couldn’t protect Wes, either. I was too small, just as helpless, but I’m older and when I grew up I still felt... I don’t know. Responsible. It’s hard being the one left behind and feeling as if a part of yourself died, as well. I know everyone believes that my reasoning for the pact not to marry has everything to do with sowing my wild oats forever, but it’s more about what I’ve to offer someone. To be honest—” he slid his eyes to her, his face a mask of sadness “—I don’t have a lot left to offer.”
“Oh, Reid.” She hugged him close, holding him until his breathing returned to normal instead of shallow bursts. “I’m so sorry.”
“Thank you. By the way, Mum’s graduated from drinking daily to drinking occasionally.”
“So she’s well now?”
“Yes.” He frowned like he didn’t want to say more, but then he did. “Sometimes I wonder if life would’ve been better if my dad had found Wesley at the bottom of that pool. I’d give anything to have my brother back, but if it had to happen then—if I could choose the way he’d die—it’d be that. We have no idea what happened to him. His body never turned up. He was simply...gone.”
Her heart snapped clean in two at the anguish in Reid’s voice.
“And you’ve dealt with it by keeping quiet.”
“Not too bright, eh?” He smiled over at her, but it was forced. She touched his chin, resting her index finger in the dent there.
“I won’t tell Gage. I won’t tell anyone. No matter what. I swear.”
“I trust you.” He squeezed her against him and kissed her forehead. She loved being this close to him, being held by him. It made her feel safe. She liked being the person he could rest his burdens on, too. “Though it’s probably time I told my friends about my brother. They think I don’t like aging and that’s why I never allow them to make a fuss over my birthday. Truth is, my family doesn’t celebrate it. We haven’t since the day we lost Wesley. After the funeral, it felt like a betrayal to continue celebrating. Every day I’m on this planet is a day he’s not.”
Oh, Reid. That guilt must’ve eaten a hole through his gut like battery acid.
“You’ve never told anyone this,” she said.
“No. What I just told you was more than I’ve admitted to family, to friends.”
“Girlfriends?”
“I don’t have girlfriends. For reasons you’ve now gleaned.”
“I always wondered why you weren’t a one-gal kind of guy. Now I know.” She could understand how he’d become gun-shy. His parents sounded like part of them had died alongside Wesley that ill-fated day. Reid must’ve felt overlooked, soaked in all those negative vibes as a child, all while struggling to understand what had happened to his brother.
“I still feel him.” Reid’s mouth tugged down at the corners. “That’s the strange part. Like there’s a chip embedded here—” he pointed to the center of his chest “—and I can still sense Wes somehow.” A quick jump of his eyebrows dismissed the subject. “You must think me barmy.”
“Barmy?” That was a new one.
“Crazy.”
“Ah. No. It’s not crazy. When my grandmother Adele died, I was fifteen years old. I had dream after dream about her. In those dreams, she always said the same thing. ‘Look for me in the sky, Drew. I have my wings.’” She smiled at the thought. “Every time I see a bird, a butterfly or a bumblebee, I say to myself, ‘Hello, Gran.’”
“Sweet and cute.”
He shook his head. “Definitely you deserve better than me.”
“Why don’t we not talk about who deserves what when it comes to us?” She wanted to sooth and comfort him. Wanted to see his easy smile return even though she knew there was a shadow hiding behind it.
“What shall we discuss, then?” His smile wasn’t quite easy but it was there. Evidently he was ready to cast off the bleak topic. She knew just how to do that.
“I should amend that we aren’t talking about who deserves what unless we’re talking about orgasms, which I can hereby state with clarity that I need a minimum of six each and every time you and I are naked together. Even though it’s unfair for you and your pitiable one at a time.” She poked her bottom lip out into an exaggerated pout, and Reid laughed. It was a small laugh, with barely any breath behind it, but she considered it a win.
“It’s not my fault I’m much better at delivering than you are, love.”
“Not funny!” She swatted him with the sleeve of the shirt she wore, belatedly realizing it was going to be unwearable if she continued wrinkling it. She sat up abruptly. “I should hang this up.”
“Wrong. You’re not leaving this bed.” He was on top of her in a flash, pinning her down and tearing open the shirt. She let her eyes wander over her own nude body, at her large breasts with nipples pointing at Reid as if saying, “Here we are!” Her legs and thighs, while not perfectly slender, had plenty of muscle. She admired the way her smooth skin was juxtaposed against Reid’s hard planes, thick thigh muscles and wiry hair on his legs. She marveled at the heavy penis brushing against her tender sex.
“Make love to me.” She flexed her arms uselessly since he held her wrists. “I need it. And so do you.”
His eyes held weighted darkness behind them. She couldn’t erase it any more than she could fill the empty part of him, but she could help take his mind off his loss.
And maybe that’s what they were to each other, a way to forget the past and heal parts of themselves that no one else could. Her by being the person he needed most right now, him by being the only man who could fulfill a decadelong fantasy for her.
“My pleasure.” He kissed her, accepting her offers—spoken and unspoken—and taking them to the pinnacle of passion yet again.
Seventeen
Drew sipped her coffee and tried her damnedest to wake up. When she wasn’t participating in an opening for a restaurant, she worked from home scheduling, interviewing and planning the next opening. Even on a Sunday like today, she’d normally be awake and handling her email. She hadn’t so much as made it to the shower yet, and it was almost ten o’clock.
Reid had kept her up way too late doing amazing things to her body she wouldn’t soon forget. She shivered, her tired smile resting on the edge of her coffee mug.
Friday night after the opening at Soo-She, he’d told her about Wesley. Last night she’d cooked for him at her place—chicken piccata—and he’d stayed the night. Christina had gone away for the weekend, leaving the house blessedly empty.
Drew had managed to get out of bed an hour ago, but hadn’t wanted to wake him with running water and the sound of the blow-dryer.
She’d lingered in the doorway of her bedroom and admired the sculpted, firm globes of his solid buttocks, the muscles in his back and how good his dark wavy hair looked against the bright white of her bedsheets.
Reid Singleton in her bed, bare-ass naked, wasn’t a sight to rush. So she’d stood there until she felt like a creeper and finally forced herself into the kitchen for coffee.
She’d been there since, but after cup number two failed to motivate her she wondered if she should give up and crawl into bed next to him.
“Morning,” came a raspy male voice from the hallway. Reid was in the gray T-shirt and worn soft jeans he’d arrived wearing, but he hadn’t bothered with socks and shoes. And his hair was finger-combed by the looks of it.
“No fair. No one should look as good as you do in the morning.”
“Hah. Nice try. Where’s mine?” He gestured to her coffee, and she pointed at the mug on the counter. “Thoughtful,” he praised as he poured himself a cup. He took the chair next to her at the kitchen table. She had one leg curled under the other, her heel resting on the edge of the seat. He wrapped one big, warm hand around her toes.
“What’s on your docket today?” Much as she’d love to lounge around in her apar
tment with Mr. Perfect Ass, she really should get to work.
“Sundays I head to the market to find something to eat for the week. I drop off my dry cleaning. The usual exciting weekend stuff. You?”
“Work.”
“On a Sunday?”
“Yeah. I work from home a lot. It’s a gig that can’t only be handled nine to five, Monday through Friday.”
“I suppose that’s true. I’ve always been grateful for my nights and weekends free. It’s the appeal of Monarch and being your own boss.”
“I thought Flynn was your boss.”
“Well. We let him believe he is.” Reid grinned.
He was too damned charming for his own good. And far more layered than she ever would’ve guessed. She’d only ever seen a fun-loving, hotter than Hades Brit who was utterly unattainable. Now that she’d been with him on multiple occasions, she saw how unfair she’d been to him. He was human, with feelings and hurts and a past that was darker than any of them knew. She’d never sensed anything ominous surrounding him, but she supposed she was too busy keeping her distance to have noticed.
“When is Christina returning?”
“Tonight.”
“My place, then? You can bring your work if you need to. No sense in both of us running off in the morning.” He sipped his coffee while he checked a weather app on his phone. “Eighty-four degrees today,” he mumbled almost to himself. As if he felt the weight of her stare, he met her gaze. “What?”
“For a guy who doesn’t want to be involved with a woman, you make a lot of plans with me.”
“Am I to believe you’re finished with me?” He raised one cocky British eyebrow. “I’m to believe you want nothing to do with me and your pending six orgasms tonight?”
“Are you so content to let me use you?” she teased with a giggle, but there was some truth to what she was asking. She didn’t feel the least bit used by him. He’d made her feel like a princess, and had soothed her most tender spots since the night he’d found out her true identity.
“Yes.” He narrowed his eyelids. “Perhaps we should outline a few ground rules to keep from getting in too deep.”
“It’s not a bad idea.” She wasn’t accustomed to open-ended anything. Her next six months were planned to the minute. Her dated planner was decorated in washi tape and appointment stickers. Her to-do list was bullet-pointed and detailed. “How about we set an end date?”
“Okay.” He nodded as if this was par for course, an idea that made her slightly uncomfortable. Nevertheless, she pressed on.
“Probably before the holidays.” She couldn’t imagine sneaking around during Thanksgiving or Christmas. The guilt of lying to her brother and family would eat her alive. “Should we count Halloween as a holiday?”
“Are you invited to any costume parties?”
“I go to at least one every year.”
“And we don’t want to navigate couple costumery.”
“I’ll be busy that entire month anyway. I’m opening three different restaurants.”
“Very well. That gives us August and September.”
“When...um. When’s your birthday?” She felt uncomfortable asking since she’d learned it was a sore topic, but she couldn’t not ask. Reid didn’t have a single good birthday memory and she wanted him to have one. One he could be happy with and not overwhelmed by.
“September fifth.”
“I can’t believe you told me that.”
“Neither can I.” His eyebrows jumped in a show of adorable self-deprecation before he stood from his chair. He finished his coffee and bent to place a kiss on her forehead. “I have to run. Tonight? My place?” At the sink he rinsed his mug. He looked in her kitchen.
My place in your life?
“Tonight. Your place,” she confirmed.
“Uber will be here in a bit,” Reid said of the car service coming to pick him up. He gathered his things from the bedroom, and she met him at the front door.
“Seeing me out?” he asked. “So sweet.”
“And cute. I know. I know.” She rolled her eyes, but she didn’t take offense to him thinking of her as “cute.” Not now that she knew “cute” and “sexy” weren’t mutually exclusive.
“Damn cute,” he agreed in a low, sexy murmur. Then he kissed her, holding on long enough to make her want to grab him by the shirt and drag him back to bed. He hummed softly as he ended their kiss and pulled open the door.
There, in the threshold, stood Gage, fist raised to knock.
“Reid?” Gage’s eyebrows crashed over his nose, then he snapped his attention to Drew. “What the hell?”
“What are you doing here?” She tried to keep her voice steady, but it wobbled slightly.
Her brother lifted a foam cooler. “Dad came into town and left this. You know I eat fish as rarely as possible. I only did that Soo-She thing because they offer a chicken option.”
Their father worked at a fish hatchery in Leavenworth, Washington. He often brought his work home with him and more often brought his work to Drew and Gage.
“Why is Reid here?” Gage asked, again skewering his best friend with a glare.
“Because, dummy,” she stalled. She always went with confidence when she had no idea how to escape the predicament before her. “He was visiting Christina.” She waved a hand at Reid, who gave her an incredulous look. “I don’t understand his appeal, but whatever.”
She crossed her arms over her chest and shrugged. If confidence didn’t sell it, indifference would.
“I thought you and Christina didn’t work out.” Contrary to her accusation, Gage was no dummy. It was up to Reid to back her up. Drew almost doubted he would. It was one thing to keep a secret from her brother, but it was another to lie to his face. She sent telepathic messages to Reid asking him to support her white lie with one of his own.
“Well, it may not last, but it worked out for the night,” Reid said, charm oozing from his every pore. “Don’t wake her. She had a long, long night,” he told Drew, going as far as to point toward Christina’s empty bedroom.
“I won’t.” Even though they were pretending, she felt a spike of jealousy at the thought of Reid and Christina having a long night together. Which made no sense, so she flashed Reid a quick smile of thanks and then took the cooler from Gage. “Thanks for the fish.”
“Where you headed?” Gage nodded at Reid.
“Home. My car will be here—” he consulted his cell phone’s app “—in two minutes.”
“Cancel it. I’ll give you a ride home.”
“You’re sure?”
“Positive.”
Reid pressed a button, declared that it was “done” and resumed his walk out the door. “Let’s go, then. Drew, always a pleasure.”
She bit her lip, hoping with all she had that Gage wouldn’t grill Reid on the way home and that she wouldn’t have to hear a lecture from her big bad brother about how Reid wasn’t the man for her. Gage might think he knew his best friend, but after last night she knew him better.
She shut the door behind her brother and her temporary boyfriend and sagged against it for a full minute. She’d been taken advantage of by men in the past, and there was no doubt in her mind that Gage would see this as another mistake in the making. He would worry she’d fall in love with Reid the way she had with Devin, and before him, Ronnie, and before him...she didn’t even want to think about how many romantic mistakes she’d made in the past. And since Gage knew his friend was as unobtainable as plucking a star from the sky and putting it in her pocket, he’d have warnings for her—and probably a few for Reid about what they were doing together.
The trouble wasn’t that Gage would be wrong to worry, the trouble was that he would be right. But she had a sixth sense about Reid. Even though she’d just agreed to an end date and even though Reid had professed himself unable to have
a long-term relationship, she believed he could come to mean more to her than either of them had ever dreamed.
He’d already been a better boyfriend than Devin and Ronnie combined. And he hadn’t even been trying.
Her eyes sank closed. She couldn’t—wouldn’t—allow herself to fall in love with Reid Singleton. No matter how amazing he was in bed or how sweet he could be in the morning. No matter that he’d shared his broken, sad past, trusting her with that information and no one else. She could keep this light and walk away unscathed. That would be best for both of them.
“Keep telling yourself that, Drew,” she said on a sigh. Then she walked the kitchen to put her freshly delivered fish in the fridge.
Eighteen
“Thanks for the lift,” Reid said, breaking the stifling silence. If it weren’t for Drew’s insistence that they keep the affair from her brother, he’d just as soon tell Gage what was going on. Reid was a grown man; he could handle whatever his best friend had to say. And Gage could use a reminder that his sister was a grown woman, whether he wanted to admit it or not.
“Christina is an odd choice for you.” Gage kept his eyes on the road, his mouth firmly set.
“Is she?” Reid tried to sound bored, but some of his irritation bled through.
“Yeah. You usually gravitate toward bubbly and bouncy, and Christina is neither of those things.”
“Opposites attract. I suppose your and Drew’s matchmaking worked.”
“Uh-huh.” More silence infiltrated the car.
“What is it, Gage? Stop being so damned stubborn and say what you’re thinking.”
“Drew is...she’s an adult and I know that. But she’s also a lot like she was when we were growing up. There’s a new, hard-won confidence to her, but there is also a naive side. She believes in dreams coming true and fairy tales, and it’s gotten her into trouble in the past. With men.”
Reid hated thinking of Drew with any of the gits she’d dated in the past, but he couldn’t exactly show his anger lest he tip his hand.
One Night, White Lies Page 10
