The town was small, and the practice was actually set up in someone’s house. They lived on the upper floor, while the practice was downstairs. When we got out, I glanced around carefully, watching for anyone that looked out of place. Overall, everyone in town just appeared to be minding their own business. We stepped inside and were greeted by a friendly receptionist, but when she handed us paperwork to fill out, I knew this wasn’t going to be easy. Carly filled out what she could and handed it back with a smile.
“You’re missing a lot of information here,” the receptionist said.
“We really just need to talk to the doctor,” I cut in.
“I’m sorry, but we need information. Even simple stuff like an address isn’t listed here.”
I could feel Carly tensing behind me, and I was slightly afraid that she would pull her gun on the woman. I placed my hand around her, trying to tell her to hold steady.
“If we could just talk to the doctor for a few minutes and explain the situation, we won’t be any more trouble.”
She pursed her lips, her eyebrows slanted down. “Well, I can let you talk to her, but I’m pretty sure she’s going to tell you that we need this information. It’s the law.”
“I understand.”
We took our seats and waited. When the doctor came out, the receptionist pulled her aside and started explaining things to her in a low voice. The doctor kept glancing over at us, and I could tell Carly was ready to run. There was no way to tell which way this would go. But even one move toward that phone, and we would have to bolt.
“Thank you for waiting,” the doctor said as she walked over. “I understand you would like to speak with me.”
“Yes,” I answered, slipping my arm around Carly’s waist. “Just a few minutes, if you have it.”
“Of course,” the doctor smiled, turning and heading toward her office. The receptionist didn’t look all that happy about us seeing the doctor, but didn’t say anything as we passed. We took our seats across from the doctor’s desk and she smiled at us.
“Well, why don’t we start with names? I’m Doctor Wilson, and you are?”
“Josh Carter, and this is my wife, Carly.”
“So, what can I help you with today?”
“We believe Carly is pregnant, and we need a doctor for her.”
She tilted her head toward Carly. “And you didn’t want to fill out the paperwork. I’m afraid that I’ll need that information to take you on as a patient.”
“What if we pay in cash?” I asked.
“Cash or check doesn’t matter, I’m afraid. Legally, I need this information to proceed.”
I glanced at Carly, not sure what to say. But she continued for me. “Doctor Wilson, it’s not possible for us to provide that information. We…witnessed something we weren’t supposed to, and giving any information will only tip off the people looking for us. We can’t go to a hospital or provide anything that could be put in the system. If you can’t help us, we’ll be on our own.”
“Have you gone to the police?” she asked, concern lacing her voice.
“They can’t help us,” Carly said. “We wouldn’t be asking you to do this if there was any other way.”
The doctor pursed her lips and looked away. This was a waste of our time. She wasn’t going to help us. I grabbed Carly’s hand and stood, making my way to the door. Staying here any longer wasn’t an option. Even her knowing that we were in the area put us in danger. We were almost to the door when she called out.
“Wait.” Slowly, I turned around and looked at the doctor. I could tell she was fighting an inner battle with herself over this. “What you’re asking me to do…I could lose everything.”
“It’s okay,” I reassured her. “We completely understand. All that we ask is that you keep this meeting to yourself. Don’t tell anyone that we were here, and as for your receptionist…just tell her we didn’t have insurance or any way to pay.”
“Where are you going?” she asked. “Your wife needs medical care.”
“We’ll figure something out.”
She nodded and we walked out of the office, hurrying out to the car.
“How much time do you think we have?” I asked Carly.
“Enough time to close up the cabin. I don’t think she wants to get anyone else involved yet.”
“We should still hurry,” I said, getting into the car. We headed out of town, but when we were on the road to the cabin, I noticed a car behind us as I looked in the rearview mirror. “We’re being followed.”
Carly spun in her seat and stared out the back window. “Shit. They couldn’t have found us. We’ve been careful.”
She pulled out her phone and zoomed in on the car behind us, then looked over at me in astonishment. “I think it’s the doctor.”
“What?” I glanced again in the mirror, but I couldn’t really tell. “What do you want me to do?”
“Just go home. We have our weapons on us. If it’s not her, we can at least take care of this where someone won’t find bodies right away.” I snorted. “What?”
“When I saw you that day at the gas station, never in a million years would I have looked at you and thought There’s a woman that knows how to hide a body.”
“But aren’t you glad now that I know?”
“It’s one of the sexiest things about you,” I grinned.
I pulled down our driveway just a few minutes later and we waited as the car behind us slowly pulled in. I got out, my hand immediately going to my weapon until the car door opened and the doctor stepped out. I let my hand fall to my side and motioned for Carly to get out.
“Is there something we can help you with?” I asked cautiously. Just because she was here didn’t mean that she wanted to help us.
“If I’m going to help you, I’ll have to come out here. I can’t afford for you to be seen in my clinic.”
“Okay,” I said hesitantly.
“I need to know, am I putting myself in danger by helping you?”
“As of right now, no one knows that we’re here. If that were to change, you wouldn’t hear from us again.”
“I don’t know how this works,” she said honestly. “I’m not sure how I can help you.”
“No records,” Carly said immediately. “No notes or anything like that. If you choose to help us, it would have to be completely off the record.”
She sighed and chuckled slightly. “I can’t believe I’m even considering this.” She glanced off into the trees and then seemed to settle on something. When she turned back to us, there was a resolve to her. “You won’t be able to come into the clinic at all. We can set prearranged times for me to come out here and check up on you. And you’ll have to deliver the baby here, if you choose to stay here.”
“Is that safe?” I asked.
“Women have done it many times before. As long as she’s healthy throughout the pregnancy, she should have no problems with a home birth.” She stepped forward and reached into her purse. “I can’t run any tests at my office, so we’ll have to rely on a home pregnancy test. You can take that now, and then we’ll talk about how we’ll proceed.”
I glanced over at Carly and she nodded slightly, stepping forward to take the test from the doctor. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me yet. We have a long way to go still.”
Carly
The months had flown by, each bringing more and more trepidation. I did my best to stay in shape, needing to be able to move fast if the need arose. Josh was begging me to take it easy, but we both knew all too well that we had to be ready for anything. I had considered calling Levi again and finding out more information, but Josh and I both agreed that with the baby on the way, we didn’t need to attract any more attention. Even if I thought that I could trust Levi, there was too much at risk.
It was chilly out now, just going into fall again. The summer had been hot at the cabin, and we didn’t have air conditioning, but luckily, the hot, sticky weather didn’t last long. Josh ran al
l the errands so that I wasn’t seen in town. A pregnant woman walking around was more memorable than a single man. I had gone stir crazy and constantly went on walks just so I wasn’t bundled up in the house for the whole pregnancy. Now that I was so close to delivering, I had to stay closer to the house. I could tell that the time was coming. My back ached so much and the braxton hicks contractions were frequent. If I told Josh that, he would freak out.
Everything about this pregnancy was wrong. It was bad timing, the wrong life, and a danger to all of us. We had already put plans in place for when we left for his brother’s house. Every scenario we could think of was in place. And if by chance something happened to us after the baby was born, Dr. Wilson agreed to make sure the baby found a good home. I couldn’t give her my brother’s address. That would be dangerous for even her.
“How are you today?” Josh asked, walking up behind me.
I smiled at him slightly. I had been feeling tightness in my stomach all morning, but I hadn’t wanted to say anything yet. Not until I was sure that it really meant something.
“Good.”
“Are you sure? You look a little…I don’t know, in pain.”
“Okay, don’t freak out.”
He rolled his eyes. “That’s exactly what I’m going to do then.”
“I think it might be time.”
“So, you say don’t freak out when you’re about to have a baby? That’s something you say when you stub your toe or accidentally kill the wrong person.”
I looked at him funny. “You know those are two very different extremes.”
“Well, I’m freaking out! Excuse me for not having the best lines.”
“See, this is why I told you not to freak out.”
“And it’s having the opposite effect.”
I placed my hand on his arm, but he started pacing the cabin, muttering to himself about how he needed to calm down. I sat down and watched him walk the length of the cabin over and over again. It was tiring, and if I thought I could get a nap in, I would. But between the contraction and him stomping all around, I would never fall asleep.
“Feeling better?” I asked when he stopped and stared out the window.
“Maybe we should take you to the hospital.”
“You know we can’t do that.”
He walked over and sat down beside me. “But if you die having a baby in a cabin, will it matter?”
“I’m not going to die having a baby.”
“You don’t know that.”
I sighed and took his hand in mine. “Plenty of women have home births. And what do you think they did before they had hospitals? Somehow, the planet was still replenished with people.”
“You’re mocking me.”
I held my hand to my chest and gave him a shocked look. “Me? Do you really think I would do that to you?”
“I know you would.”
“Look, it’ll be fine. By the time the doctor is done at her clinic, I’ll be getting close to having the baby. It’ll all turn out fine.”
“When has anything gone our way?” he asked.
“Well…” I thought about it for a second and smiled. “We’re not dead yet. That’s something.”
“Wow…that’s so comforting. I’m glad I have you as my partner in life. Always looking on the bright side.”
I smiled and patted his hand. “Now, why don’t we start getting things ready for the doctor. Where did you put that checklist she gave us?”
An hour later, we had everything laid out and ready for a home birth. I was pacing the cabin as the contractions got stronger and Josh was watching me, biting his nails with every step I took. I couldn’t take too much more of this. I would kick him out for the delivery if the doctor didn’t need him.
By the time the doctor showed up, I was breathing through some pretty intense contractions. I couldn’t have an epidural, so this was going to be painful, and I was prepared for that. What I wasn’t prepared for was how exhausted I was going to be by the time the baby came. Hours of pushing, and I felt like I had nothing left to give. Josh was coaching me, trying to keep me calm and the doctor was doing everything she could to reassure me that this was totally normal.
After an especially painful push, I flopped my head back against Josh’s chest and started crying. I never cried, but my body hurt and I was so tired. I just wanted this all to be over.
“Come on, Carly, just one more push,” the doctor urged.
“You keep saying that,” I reminded her.
She smiled and nodded. “This time it’s the real thing. The baby is almost here. You just have to keep going.”
Josh gripped me behind my knees and helped me sit up again. This time when I pushed, I felt the baby start to slide out.
“Good, good, Carly. The head is out. One more push and the baby will be out.”
I wanted to start crying, but knowing that it was almost over, I took one more deep breath, and when that contraction hit, I gave it everything left in me. I pushed so hard that I felt like I was going to pass out. And then I felt the relief and the emptiness in my belly. I flopped back against Josh and breathed hard as my body started to shake. It was over.
Then the baby’s cries filled the room and I stopped thinking. We didn’t even know what it was yet. But it was here and alive. I felt Josh’s hand on my shoulder, giving me a gentle squeeze.
Dr. Wilson looked up at us and smiled. “Congratulations, you have a baby girl.”
“A girl?” I asked, my eyes watering as I placed my hand over my mouth. We had a girl. And suddenly, all the emotions I hadn’t let out over the past nine months came rushing to the surface. I had a girl, but I couldn’t keep her. I wouldn’t be able to watch her grow up or have any kind of relationship with her. Right now was all I had.
The doctor cleaned her up and then walked over to me, holding her in a blanket. “Carly, meet your daughter.”
She handed her over, placing her on my chest, and my tears caught in my throat. She was beautiful. She had this thick head of brown hair and beautiful blue eyes. She was perfect.
“I can’t believe it,” I whispered.
“She looks just like you,” Josh said, looking over my shoulder.
“You think?”
“Definitely. I’d recognize that beautiful face anywhere.”
I turned to Josh and he smiled, bending down to kiss my lips. “You did good, Momma.”
“We did good.”
It had been two months of bliss. Alessa was this magical thing I never thought I would experience. She made me softer, more loving, and I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing. Every time I held her, I was all too aware of what was coming, what I still had to do. I couldn’t hide from the fact that I was running from the mafia. I couldn’t deny that I had killed people before. Being a mom just wasn’t in the cards for me. But when I held her, I got to see what life could be like, if only I had been born into a different family. I had known my whole life that having kids would never be some magical experience. But Josh was different. He came from a loving family, and he was about to give his little girl up, before he even got a chance to watch her grow.
He was really good with her, spending most days doting on her and giving her kisses. His face lit up whenever he looked at her, and when he looked at me, I could see the longing for the life we couldn’t have. It was killing me inside every day to know that it wouldn’t be too much longer before we had to leave. The only consolation was knowing that she would be with family. Maybe one day, she would know something of her parents, and know that we did this for her, because we loved her too much to ever let anything happen to her.
“How’s my baby girl?” I asked as I picked her up out of the drawer that was filled with blankets. We had pulled it out of the dresser and had been using it as a bassinet. It didn’t make any sense to have a crib for her since we wouldn’t have her for long. And when we gave her over to Josh’s brothers, we couldn’t be carrying a lot of stuff.
I wrapped her favorite gi
raffe blanket around her and held her close to me, breathing in her baby scent. She smelled so new and wonderful that sometimes I forgot how things were going to turn out. I hummed to her as I walked around the small room, rubbing her back as she made little noises against my shoulder. She was staying awake for longer now, and I was grateful that I would get to see a little of her personality before I had to hand her over.
I sat down on the bed and pulled down my shirt to feed her. She latched on right away, eating like she was starving, which I knew she wasn’t. She just really liked to eat. I brushed my fingers through her hair as I smiled down at her. I was going to miss this time I had with her, when it was just the two of us and I could pretend like it would last forever.
“I love you so much, Alessa. I always will. And maybe someday, I’ll be able to see you again.”
Tears filled my eyes as I continued to stare at her. I felt him standing nearby and looked up. He was in the doorway watching us, a sad look on his face. He walked over to me and sat down on the bed beside us, staring down at our girl.
“How are we going to do this?” I asked, tears slipping down my face. “How do we just walk away from her?”
I could see the moisture in his eyes, but he blinked and it was gone. “We just do,” he said gruffly. “Because it’s what’s best for her.”
“Maybe we could-“
“No,” he said firmly, his face turning hard. “We agreed on this. Her safety is all that matters. We can’t take the chance that anything would ever touch her.”
I knew he was right, but I couldn’t stand giving her up. It was killing me.
“Remember who you are,” he said roughly. “Remember how you were raised and who’s after us. She didn’t choose this life, and I won’t put her at risk so we can have her. We put her in this position and now we’ll make sure that it never touches her.”
It was like a slap to the face. I knew he didn’t mean to sound like he was blaming me, but with my emotions running wild, I couldn’t help it.
Wanted Dead or In Love: A Small Town Romance (The Cortell Brothers Book 3) Page 13
