by Leenie Brown
“Indeed?”
He peeked out from under his arm. “Indeed,” he replied flatly. He had been so certain after the way she responded to his kiss that she felt something favourable towards him. He had even dared to hope that she loved him. However, he had been wrong.
“You are not going to accompany us to church?” Darcy asked.
Richard groaned. “No.” Was that all the comfort he was going to receive from Darcy? Could the man not stomp about and declare Caroline lacking in judgment or in possession of deficient faculties?
“Very well. I shall leave you then.”
Richard pushed up onto his elbows. “No, you will stay.”
Darcy, who had not moved a muscle, smiled. “First, you order me to leave, and now, you order me to stay? Mrs. Hurst may be correct. The apothecary should be called.”
Richard narrowed his eyes. “You are not usually so teasing. I do not like it. You are supposed to be steady and the source of rational thinking when I am not. Now do your part.”
“What would you like me to say?”
“That she is a fool. That she could do no better than me.” He flopped back onto his pillow. “Go away, you’re making me into a blathering old ninny.”
“I am not leaving,” Darcy said softly. “I would gladly think her a fool if she were to refuse you. You are a good man and not without some fortune, such that it is.”
Richard glanced at Darcy hopefully.
“However,” Darcy continued, “you do not know for a certainty that she would refuse you. Have you told her you are willing to resign your commission?”
“Why would I do that?”
“Why do you think the fact that you are a soldier was listed among her reasons for not considering you? Perhaps they are the same as your reasons for wishing to sell your commission before you marry.” Darcy drew a breath and released it. “I never thought I would be convincing anyone of Caroline Bingley’s worth, but… There are many women who would gladly marry and become a widow with all due haste because they did not marry for love. You know it as well as I. We have seen some very happy widows.”
A half smile that matched the one his cousin wore crept across Richard’s lips. There were some ladies who seemed to prefer being a Mrs. with no Mr.
“A lady who has married for love does not wish to be parted from her heart. I would venture to guess that Caroline loves you, and that is why she listed it as a disqualification.”
Richard sighed. What Darcy said made sense. “It does not change the fact that I am not good enough.”
Darcy’s brows furrowed. “When you have slept off whatever remains of the brandy you consumed, perhaps you will figure out why that is not true. Commissions can be sold.”
Richard scowled. He didn’t need to sleep off the brandy to understand what his cousin was saying. “I am still a second son and have no estate.”
Darcy sighed. “And you are as stubborn as Aunt Catherine. Your father will see to it that you have land.”
Richard shrugged. His heart and head hurt enough without having to admit that his cousin was right, and he was simply being foolish.
“Elizabeth was right,” he said as Darcy moved to rise.
“About what?”
“It is just as unpleasant to be cast aside for lack of wealth and standing as it is to be pursued for it.”
Darcy smiled sadly at him. “You have not been cast aside until you have asked for her hand and been rejected. Until then, the battle is not over.”
Again, Richard shrugged instead of acknowledging the truth of his cousin’s words.
“I will tell Georgiana and Mrs. Hurst that you are only suffering from a headache and a day’s rest will improve it.”
Richard cocked a brow in disbelief.
“Very well, I shall have to tell Georgiana what you heard, but it will go no further.”
Richard nodded, flopped back on his bed, and waved a hand in dismissal. “Now, go away, so I can suffer in peace.”
“No alcohol,” Darcy cautioned. “Tea, coffee, broth, but no alcohol, not even cider. I will leave instructions for such with your man, and Georgiana is whom you will have to face if you do not follow them.”
“Go away,” Richard grumbled.
Darcy placed a hand on Richard’s ankle, drawing his attention. “She is a fool if she refuses you,” he said. Then he turned and left Richard to his miserable wallowing.
Chapter 12
The empty place at the table for breakfast, as well as the lack of whistling in the hallway, had made Caroline’s heart ache. Now, as she attempted to pay attention to the scripture that was being read, she wished to hear the colonel’s voice joined with the rest of the congregation, lifted in prayer. She glanced at her brother on her right and then at her sister on her left. How was it that standing here surrounded not only by the whole of the worshiping portion of Meryton but also her family, she felt so small, so isolated, so set apart and alone?
She clamped her lips closed and stifled a yawn. She had not slept well. How could she have? Her heart was unwilling to listen to logic. It was fixed, most steadily and assuredly, on the gentleman who was currently missing from their party. She could not fault him for being indisposed, but she could long for him not to be. She knelt and rose, repeated and remained silent as was required, but her mind was not focused as it should be on the words being spoken. As they sat for the sermon, she studied the Bennets. Tomorrow, she would call on them, but today, she felt a stirring within her to begin to mend her ways.
A small smile curled her lips as she remembered with fondness the hours spent with Miss Darcy, talking and looking at fashion plates. It reminded her a bit of how it used to be for her and Louisa. But then, that gnawing fear of failing and being rejected had set in, right around the time when that horrid witch, Miss Smith, had pointed out loudly to one and all who were gathered at that dinner how lacking Caroline was. Caroline could still feel the sting of Miss Smith’s words about her father not being a gentleman. How she had degraded him! And he being a well-respected man in their community! It was then that Caroline had begun to actively work to hide her ties to trade and had begun to aspire to marry as wealthy and esteemed a gentleman as was possible. A title she knew was beyond her grasp, but the nephew of a man with a title seemed manageable. And now, that man was betrothed to a lady whom Caroline had treated almost as badly as Miss Smith had treated her. Caroline had not been vocal in her criticism of the Bennets in public, but in private, she had not held her tongue.
Caroline jumped when Louisa poked her in the side with her elbow.
“It is time to leave,” Louisa hissed. “Are you certain you are well?”
Caroline blinked and nodded. “I was merely woolgathering.”
“In church?”
“I know,” Caroline whispered, “Mama would scold.”
“And with good reason,” Louisa agreed.
Caroline rose and checked the fastening on her pelisse and fiddled with her gloves, making certain they were on snugly as she followed Charles out of the church. They would, no doubt, stand around for a few minutes and talk with the Bennets.
She was not wrong. Charles headed directly for Jane. Caroline sighed. That was what she wanted — a gentleman who longed to be with her and loved her as her brother loved Miss Bennet. It mattered not if he were the captain of a merchant ship or a tenant farmer, though she would prefer him to have an estate.
“Miss Bennet, Miss Elizabeth,” she said as she joined them. “I would be very pleased if you would do me the honour of dining with us tonight.”
“You would be?”
Caroline gave her brother a pointed look. “Yes, I would be. It is not long until your marriage, and I thought it might be pleasant to give Miss Bennet a tour of Netherfield.”
Charles’s brows drew together. “That would be pleasant.”
Caroline smiled and turned to Jane. “Will you come?”
“She most certainly will,” Mrs. Bennet replied.
“And
you, Miss Elizabeth? Will you also join us?”
“Yes, I would like that.”
Though Elizabeth’s words were confident, her eyes held a certain amount of skepticism. Caroline could not fault her for that. They had not been on very friendly terms, and Caroline had attempted to separate Elizabeth’s sister from Charles. “I am glad.” She turned to Charles. “I will await you in the carriage.”
“I will not be long,” he replied.
“Do not hurry on my account,” she said. It was what would be the expected polite thing to be said, but to her, the words did not fall from her lips without meaning. She truly did not wish for him to rush away from Miss Bennet. He was so happy. How had she been willing to take that from him? It was abominable to treat another in such a fashion — especially a brother one loved dearly.
“You are different,” Louisa commented as they walked to the carriage.
“Am I?”
“Yes,” replied Louisa. “Hurst, do you not think Caroline changed?”
Louisa’s husband shrugged. “She seems friendlier if that is what you mean.”
“Yes, yes, that is it exactly!” Louisa cried.
“Miss Bennet is to be our sister, and Miss Elizabeth is to be Darcy’s wife. It seems only fitting that we should become friends.”
“No, no, it is more than that. You have been friendlier, more contemplative, and well, just more as you used to be before Father died,” Louisa said. “It is more than just accepting our fate.”
Caroline chuckled. It had a lot to do with accepting her fate. In fact, it had everything to do with accepting that she was the daughter of a tradesman who could run a home as well as any gentleman’s daughter, that she was a sister who wished to see her brother happy no matter the lineage of the lady he loved, that she had never been able to capture the heart of a wealthy nephew of an earl, and that she loved a man who was not at all the sort she would choose but was precisely the sort she wished to hear say he was proud of her. Of course, she would not say any of that to her sister.
~*~*~
Everyone had returned from church and eaten their meal before Richard dared venture from his room. His head was beginning to clear, and he was tired of the same four walls and vistas from his window. Quietly, he snuck down the servant’s stairs and to the library. He sat down and picked up his book, then noting the fact that the last time he had sat in this chair he had been reading to Caroline, he moved himself to a chair as far from the hearth as possible. Satisfied that in this new location he would not see her image if he should glance up from his reading, he opened his book and began to read. He had consumed two chapters and was beginning to think that lighting a lamp would soon be necessary when the door to the library opened and the vision he did not want to see walked into the room.
He snapped his book closed and rose to leave.
“Colonel, you are out of bed.” Caroline greeted him with a smile.
“I was about to return to my bed,” he answered. He was not really going to return to bed, but it seemed a good prevarication to aid him in his escape.
Her smile faded. “Are you truly unwell? The apothecary can be called.”
“Too much brandy is all,” he answered honestly. “Time and quiet are all that are needed to be cured.”
“Then you stay. I can read elsewhere,” she suggested. “Indeed, I should likely read in my room, so that I can easily prepare for my guests when it is time.”
“Guests?” he questioned.
“Miss Bennet and Miss Elizabeth. I have invited them for dinner and a tour of the house. It will be Miss Bennet’s home soon.” She looked hopefully at him.
“You are correct, and it is a fine thing you are doing. I know it is not easy for you to accept them.”
“No,” Caroline said quickly, “oddly it is not difficult at all.”
“It is not?”
Caroline shook her head. “I have been doing a great deal of thinking lately, and a friend has taught me to look at things differently from the way I did.”
“I am glad.” He needed to be away from her. “I fear I must be abrupt and take my leave, but my head is throbbing.” It wasn’t, but it was better to say it was his head and not his heart.
“Oh, certainly. I should not have detained you.”
“You did not. Enjoy your reading and your company.” He gave her a small bow and left the room quickly before his heart could keep him there longer. Quickly, he made his way toward he servant’s stairs and was halfway up them and drawing close to the safety of his room when…
“Sir.”
Richard stopped and turned toward the footman who had called to him.
“A letter for you sir,” the footman said as he bounded up the stairs two at a time.
Richard took the letter from the man. “Has the rider been paid?”
“He has.”
“Very good. Thank you.”
The footman descended the stairs as Richard turned the letter he held over in his hands. Why was his father sending him an express? He broke the seal as he walked down the hall.
Son,
It is my grievous business to inform you that your mother’s brother, the one after whom you were named, has died. I am in receipt of some documents which will be of interest to you and pertain to your future. Your mother is telling me to say that you are to dispose of your commission as soon as is possible. You will understand her demand in a moment after she has given me the liberty to impart the news I need to share. There, she is gone to examine some gown that your sister has received but is not pleased with. I will make this brief as it is likely I will be called upon soon to witness whatever travesty has occurred.
Your uncle, as you know, inherited your grandfather’s estate on his passing with the stipulation that on your uncle’s demise, the estate be passed on to your mother’s second son. Your grandfather and your uncle both knew that your brother would have no need of such an estate. Therefore, you were selected to be the recipient of the inheritance.
Your mother has indeed reappeared. The tragedy of fashion was remedied by a well-placed flower. Along with resigning your commission, your mother insists you find a wife.
I will close now before your mother can add any more demands to this missive. However, I will add an admonishment. Your mother will most likely attempt to select a wife for you, but I will tell you as I have told Darcy and your brother. It is far more pleasant to wrap your arms around a lady you love rather than either her pedigree or fortune. Do not just find a wife, my son. Find happiness as I have done with your mother.
Send me whatever might be necessary to begin the process of disposing of your commission. Your mother will not rest until that is begun.
Give my love to Darcy and Georgiana.
Your Father,
HF, LM
Richard shook his head and read the letter again. An estate. He was now in possession of an estate? He was no longer wanting. He tossed the letter and his book on the bed and turned to run down to the library to share the news with Caroline. She would have no reason to refuse him now. However, he made it no further than the door when he realized that he did not wish to be accepted because of his estate any more than he wished to be rejected for not having one.
His shoulders sagged. How was he to remain here with her for another week and two days without telling her his news? He was certain his heart would not keep it a secret if it saw that sharing the tale could earn him the happiness he wished to claim.
He paced to the window and looked out into the growing darkness of the winter evening. He turned and leaned against the window frame as his eyes wandered the room coming to rest at last on his father’s letter. That was it. He would return to London and begin the transfer of his commission. Tomorrow, Wickham would be gone. Georgiana would be safe, and he would no longer be needed. He looked out the window once more. No branches swayed, and the moon would rise full and bright in a clear sky. Yes, he would return to London, and he would go tonight.
Chap
ter 13
Caroline placed her wine glass on the table. Charles had suggested that they eat first and tour after. Then, if time allowed, they could play cards. Caroline had declared it an excellent plan with Louisa seconding the approval.
And so, they had eaten.
“Are preparations progressing well for the wedding breakfast?” Caroline asked Jane.
“Yes. Very well. Mama and Aunt Gardiner seem to have every detail of the breakfast as well as the wedding itself well in hand,” Jane replied. “Aunt Gardiner is going to extend her stay. It was always their plan to return to town tomorrow, but now, Uncle will go without her and the children. However, he will come again in time for the wedding.”
“I do hope the weather cooperates,” Caroline replied. “It can be so unpredictable, but at this time of year, it seems worse.”
They lapsed into silence for a few moments.
“Will you be returning to town after the wedding?” Elizabeth asked Caroline. “I would assume you would not wish to miss the season. I have never had one, but I hear tell that it can be very entertaining if one likes to dance.”
Caroline did not miss the impertinent look Elizabeth gave Darcy. It still surprised her how relaxed Darcy was and just how much he could tease and be teased.
“I do enjoy a good soiree with dancing,” Caroline said with a smile. “So, yes, I will be leaving with Louisa and Hurst. After all, I am not yet married, so whether I like participating in the season or not, it is my duty. It is just fortunate that I enjoy it and do not find it to be a burden.”
“That is good,” Elizabeth agreed.
Caroline’s brows furrowed slightly at the silent communication that passed between Elizabeth and Darcy and then Darcy and Georgiana following her comments. Where they assessing her ability to find a husband? Or was it something else?
“I think I will find the season to be somewhat overwhelming when I finally get my turn,” Georgiana said. “I do not like being scrutinized.”
“You will perform magnificently!”
