A minute later, Robert, the head of the IT department and James’s right-hand man, comes out, his hair disheveled and his tie askew. It’s the first time I’ve seen him like this. He’s always dressed immaculately. His expression is far from the cool aloofness he usually wears as he stares at the woman moving further and further away.
“Come back here, woman,” he calls out.
She pauses for a beat but doesn’t turn around to acknowledge him and continues walking, moving around a corner and out of sight.
Robert curses and swipes a hand through his hair. He sees me sitting on the sofa and laughs half-mockingly at himself as he fixes his tie. “Drives me fucking crazy.”
I get up and shake his hand. “Yeah, I know the feeling,” I say, and we share a glance.
Robert knows how I feel about Julia. He’s always been observant and notices everything about everyone around him. It’s a skill that has quickly made him climb the corporate ladder. James trusts him as he is Clarissa’s friend and a good man. We’ve been working together on the software security updates, and I’ve gotten to know him quite well. We’ve developed a friendship of sorts. I know how he feels about his PA, and he knows how I feel about Julia. We both keep each other’s secret.
“How’ve you been? What brings you to this floor of the office?” he asks as he shakes my hand.
“Julia’s inside with James. He wants her to work here, so he’s going to show her around,” I tell him.
“Yeah, I heard she was back. Haven’t gotten a chance to meet her yet,” he says, and a growl of possessiveness escapes me. I don’t want any other man thinking about Julia in any way.
Robert laughs and holds up his hand. “Easy. You know it’s not like that.”
He shakes his head as he holds his office door open wider, inviting me inside. I gratefully step in, and he follows me.
“Between you and James, there’s enough caveman gene to send us back to the Stone Age,” he adds teasingly, but I notice him glancing at the empty hallway once again before he shuts the door.
We sit down and discuss the updates. Robert suggests a few additional steps we can take to improve the security measures, and I agree and take notes to discuss with my team later. We’re so engrossed in our work, we don’t realize it’s been hours since we started until Sarah, Robert’s PA, comes barging into the office without knocking.
Robert immediately stands up at the look of alarm on her face. “Sarah, what’s wrong?” He starts moving toward her, but her eyes go past him and lock onto me.
“It’s Julia. We can’t find her,” she says in a rushed tone.
My heart stops. I’m utterly motionless for a moment before her words sink in, and I leap out of my chair and start walking toward her.
“What the fuck do you mean you can’t find her?” I question. “She’s supposed to be with James in his office.”
I don’t realize Sarah has taken a step back in alarm until Robert moves in front of her, blocking my path. “Brandon, control yourself.” There’s a warning in his tone, but I can’t focus on anything besides the blood rushing in my ears. Julia is missing. Missing.
Sarah starts speaking from behind Robert’s back, and he turns to look at her, keeping his body between us. “They talked. And then James had to go attend a meeting, so I offered to take her on a tour of the building. We looked around for a bit, and then I had to come back to my desk, so she told me she would be fine on her own. We agreed to meet for lunch at one o’clock, but she’s twenty minutes late. She isn’t in the cafeteria, and I’ve asked almost everyone. No one has seen her for almost two hours.”
Oh God. Jesus, this isn’t happening. I can’t believe I left and she’s somewhere without me right now. Unsafe. I left her unsafe. I rush out of Robert’s office and into James’s, but the room is empty. I walk back into the waiting area and turn in a circle. Where could she go? I can’t think. I’m panicking, and I can’t think.
I turn to Sarah. “Where did you last see her?” I ask.
“We were on the second floor. I left her in front of the filing room, came up here, and—”
She stops suddenly and looks at the empty desk in the waiting room.
“Where’s Olivia?” she asks to herself before her face drains of all color. She turns to Robert and whispers in a horror-filled voice, “The filing room on the second floor. Robert, it doesn’t have any windows.”
He moves closer to her and takes her hand in his as he turns to me. “I’ll let James know. Go.”
I don’t wait to hear what else he says. I run. I don’t look back to see if they are following me. I run like my life depends on it. I run toward my life.
The filing room. Jesus, it’s the only room in this whole fucking building that doesn’t have windows. I think about how Julia doesn’t get into elevators unless someone is with her, how she always rolls down the car window as soon as she gets in. I think about her sweet smile and her kind heart, and I run faster.
When I reach the door of the filing room, I find it locked from the outside. Murderous rage fills me, and for a moment everything goes black. I’ll kill that bitch.
A hand coming from behind me snaps me out of my haze, and I turn to see James pushing his way past me toward the now open door.
I didn’t even notice him inserting the key in the lock and opening it. I start following him, but he jerks to a halt a few feet inside the room. Julia must not be in there, I think, and a dozen possibilities of where else she could be start running through my head. I’m about to turn around and leave so I can go search somewhere else when I hear a whimper come from inside the room.
The anguish on James’s face barely registers, all my attention fixed on the small, trembling figure squeezed between two rows of filing cabinets in the far corner of the room.
“Jules.” James starts to move toward her, but she whimpers again and shuffles backward further. Her legs are pushed up to her chest, her arms wrapped around them. Her head is buried in her knees, her hair falling forward to cover her face completely.
“Don’t,” I say and catch James’s arm as he takes another step forward. He turns furious eyes on me, and I explain, “She doesn’t see you. She doesn’t know it’s you. You’re scaring her.”
Dropping his arm, I take a few silent steps toward where Julia is sitting. The smudges of dirt on her arms make my heart weep.
When I’m a few feet from her, I drop to my knees and hold my arms out. “Sweetness.”
Her head comes up, but when she looks at me, her gaze is desolate and empty. She has retreated too far into herself.
My heart seizes, and a note of urgency creeps into my voice. “Sweetness, it’s me. Look at me. It’s your Brandon.”
Her gaze clears in slow degrees. I wait for what feels like an eternity, kneeling on the floor in front of her, my arms wide open, my eyes fixed on hers. Eventually, her body stops trembling, and I only have a moment to brace myself as she gets up and launches herself across the distance separating us and straight into my waiting arms. I close them around her tightly and get up from the floor, holding her to my chest.
She keeps whispering, “You’re here. You’re here,” over and over again, her face pressed into my neck and her arms holding me in a death grip.
“Jesus,” I say. My breath comes out of me in a long exhale of relief. She’s safe. She’s in my arms again. I feel as if I’m taking my first real breath since the moment I found out she was missing.
She’s practically climbing over my body, her hands clutching at my shirt.
“You’re safe now, sweetness. I have you. It’s okay.”
I hitch her up higher against me, guiding her legs around my waist. “You’re with me now. No one will hurt you. You’re safe.” I keep whispering the words in her hair.
She doesn’t lift her face from where it’s buried in my neck, but her trembling slowly starts easing.
I turn around with her in my arms. Robert is standing outside the room, his hand on Sarah’s shoulder. Her ey
es are wide with unshed tears and both of her hands are covering her mouth as she watches Julia. But James is looking right at me, his hands clenched tightly into fists, his gaze narrowed on where my hand is stroking down Julia’s back in constant, continuous motion.
“I’m taking her home with me,” I tell him quietly.
Julia doesn’t look up, her small body trying to curl itself into mine. James opens his mouth to say something when Julia whimpers and tightens her arms around my neck. He sees the movement and stops speaking, giving a quick jerk of his head instead.
I know this isn’t easy for him. Letting her go when she is so scared. But I can’t think about anything except Julia and wanting to comfort her. Needing to take her pain away. So I place a hand behind her head and wrap the other around her waist as I quickly stride out of the room.
When I reach the elevators, I press the call button, but Julia tenses and starts shaking her head frantically, the top of her head bumping my chin. I place my hand on her head again, stroking my fingers through her hair.
“All right, sweetness. It’s okay. We won’t go in there. We’ll take the stairs,” I whisper softly. “Shh, it’s okay now. You’re with me. I have you.”
I take the stairs two at a time, cradling Julia’s small body close to me. As soon as I reach the lobby, I call one of my security team members, and when I step outside the door, a car pulls up at the curb.
I get into the backseat and place Julia in my lap. Her face is still pressed into my neck, but she’s stopped shivering. I continue soothing my palm up and down her back, my mouth moving in her hair and whispering nonsensical words to her until we reach my house.
The driver gets out to open the car door, and seeing me carrying Julia in my arms, he rushes ahead of us to open the door to my house. I climb the front steps and head straight to my room.
Placing Julia on the edge of the bed, I kneel down in front of her and take her hands. Her skin is ice-cold. She doesn’t feel like my sweetness. There’s no warmth in her touch, no light in her gaze. The rage threatens to rise up again, and blackness swirls around the edges of my vision, but I focus on her and breathe deeply.
“What can I do?” I ask her helplessly.
She’s looking down at our joined hands. I bring them up and blow my breath on the backs of her fingers, rubbing them against my mouth. Her silence is shattering me. This isn’t her. She’s full of joy and life. I’m the darkness to her light. To think someone has managed to extinguish that will destroy me.
“Tell me how to help.”
She slowly raises her head and looks at me. “Just hold me. That always helps.”
I stand and pull her up with me, turning down the top sheet and climbing in behind her. Covering us both up, I take her in my arms, her head lying against my chest as I trail my fingers through her hair.
She is quiet for a while, and I try to be patient when I want to plead with her to share what she is thinking. Give your burdens to me. Let me carry them for you. But Julia is strong. There is steel beneath her silk. Iron in her spine. She has the strength to carry her burdens on her own. I can only hope she allows me to help her do it. I know this. So I lie there with my fingers in her golden hair, and I wait.
After a while, she starts speaking. “I don’t understand. Some people…they can be so…”
Her thoughts are disjointed, and she pauses for a minute before she starts speaking again.
“There is good and bad in everyone. I know that. Two sides of a coin. Balance of the universe. But some people…some people can be so evil.” Her head lifts from my chest, and she looks deep into my eyes as she asks, “How can they be so evil, Brandon?”
Evil. My breath hitches, and my heart skips a beat. It’s that word. That word she says in her innocent, questioning voice.
The world dissolves around me. Julia is in my arms, and I can feel her warm, soft body, but I don’t see her. She is saying something to me as her chest vibrates against the side of mine, but it’s not her voice I hear.
Another face. Another voice from the past rings in my ear. “Evil. Your soul is evil. You have damned yourself to hell.”
Soft lips press to mine, and a shy, wet tongue traces the seam of my tightly closed lips. I would know her taste anywhere. Sugar and honey. That’s what she tastes like. I eagerly open my mouth, and her tongue sweeps in, gliding over my front teeth. But then it stops. And that hesitation is what brings me back to the present.
This is my Julia. She doesn’t know the taste of a man’s mouth. She doesn’t know how to kiss. Because she has been mine since she was sixteen, and she’s saved herself for me. I groan and fist my hand in the back of her head, pulling her closer. Her breasts press into my chest and her hair falls forward, creating a cocoon around us.
There is no place for the past in my mind when I’m with her. She drives all my demons away. Her brilliant light fills up my soul. If I’m damned to hell, I need a taste of heaven first.
I open my mouth wider and tangle my tongue with hers, guiding her until she is taking swipes at mine, licking the roof of my mouth and grazing the sides of my teeth. I moan and silently encourage her to explore more. Yes, lick me deep. Learn my taste. Get to know your man.
When we’re both fighting for breath, I let her pull back. Her eyes are glazed and shining with lust, but she quickly shakes her head and her gaze clears. Made of steel and iron, my sweetness.
“You were gone, Brandon. For a moment there, you were somewhere I couldn’t reach you.”
I can see how much this scares her. It scares me too. I don’t want to be out of her reach. How will her light touch my soul then?
I pull her up my chest and touch my forehead to hers. “I will always be here with you. Even when I’m not here, I’m here.” I lean down and press my lips to the pulse beating in her throat. “I’m the blood in your veins, Julia. I’m what flows through your heart. No one and nothing can take me from you.”
Even as I say this, I wonder if the ghosts of my past are gaining more power the longer I hide them in the shadows. The longer I hide them from her.
Julia puts her head on the pillow above my head, her nose pressed into the top of my hair, and starts to quietly hum. She doesn’t reply, but her hands are resting lightly at the sides of my face, stroking the day’s growth of beard on my cheeks. And for now, I’m content.
I rest there with my face in her neck, and the significance of our position doesn’t escape me. The comforter has become the one in need of comfort. But this is Julia. She’s my woman, and she owns every part of me. I’m not ashamed to show her my vulnerabilities, and I lie there with her holding me until we both slowly drift off to sleep, locked in each other’s arms.
Chapter 6
Brandon
I’m roused awake when I hear the doorbell ring. I know who it is, and I also know I can’t put them off any longer. They’re worried about her too.
I slowly detangle myself from Julia and stand up from the bed. She frowns in her sleep and rolls over but promptly goes back to sleep again. Good, she needs her rest. This has been an emotionally exhausting day for her. I bend and kiss her hair before heading downstairs to open the door.
James and Clarissa are standing outside. James’s hand is locked inside Clarissa’s, and I think she is the only thing anchoring him, because even though his face is carefully neutral, I’ve known him long enough to recognize the fury burning in his eyes.
I invite them inside, and we all walk into the living room. They don’t take a seat. Instead, James looks in the direction of the stairway and takes a step toward it. I step in front of him and block his path.
“She’s asleep.”
“Move, Stone. I need to see if she’s okay for myself.” His words are gritted out from between his teeth.
I put my hands palm up and attempt to make him see reason. “She was emotionally drained when I brought her back here. It took a while, but she finally went to sleep. She needs to rest and recover from this.” My voice gets firmer. I won
’t allow anyone, not even Julia’s brother, to come in the way of her health. “I will not let you disturb her.”
James looks at me and nods in acquiescence. He guides Clarissa to the couch and helps her sit down before taking a seat himself and bluntly asking, “Since when?”
I look toward the stairs. I want to go back to Julia and hold her. She might wake up without me and startle in unfamiliar surroundings. But I also need to explain everything to James. He’s her brother, and they’re very close to each other. I would never want to come between them. Choosing between the two of us would tear my sweet girl apart.
I sigh and move to take a seat in one of the armchairs. “I want to make it clear that nothing happened before she left for university abroad. Not after her eighteenth birthday, and certainly not before.”
The vehemence in my tone surprises James, but he recovers quickly and leans forward. “Does she know?” he asks.
Clarissa frowns slightly in confusion, but I don’t meet her eyes. “No,” I reply quietly.
James exhales and sits back. He doesn’t say anything else, his gaze fixed on me steadily.
I keep looking at him and say, “I’m in love with her. Have been since the first moment I saw her. I would die protecting her. If nothing else, you know this to be true.”
I see Clarissa give his hand a squeeze. He squeezes back before saying, “I’ve always believed you’re a good man, Stone. A good man who was dealt a bad hand in life, but he struggled to rise up from that and make something of himself.”
It’s the understanding in his words that undoes me. I swallow and clear my throat, looking down. James pauses to give me a moment to collect myself. So alike, brother and sister. It gives me hope Julia will be as generous as he has shown to be. I want to go up and bare my soul to her right now when I’m feeling this hope float around in my chest.
But James isn’t done speaking. “If she’s happy with you, I won’t stand in your way.”
I look up in gratitude, and he smiles and nods at me.
Tethered to Him (Alphamen in Suits Book 2) Page 4
