by C. S. Wilde
“I-I… ”
I’m not sure if I can. I wouldn’t think twice before smashing a bug back on Earth, but this bug’s blood pulses inside my grip, its alien heart bumping madly against its chest. I know killing it is the obvious course of action, but I can feel its body reverberating with life.
“Law of the jungle,” she says.
Okay, I can do this.
I press my grip and the bug shrieks a high pitched buzz, the thumping of its heart stronger against my mind, pulsing, screaming, begging. And suddenly I’m squeezing the life of all those reptilians, no, I’m blasting them into oblivion. Their children cry as their flesh shreds, their mothers watch them vaporize. All within a moment.
My head thumps, face feels warm, wet, and I realize my entire body is shaking.
I can’t do this.
The machete comes rushing down, slicing the bug in half and breaking my telekinetic grip. The two fleshy lumps thump on the dirt. Blue goo flows from the cuts, bathing the ground.
“Respect one’s limits,” Chuck growls, chest up toward his sister, as if she were a beast he was trying to intimidate, which is kind of hard considering his size, and still, it works.
She shrinks before him, then blinks as if she’s waking from a dream. “I-I apologize, James Bauman.”
“It’s okay,” I mutter, barely paying attention to her as I wipe tears from my face.
I couldn’t kill a freaking bug. I’m such a wimp.
Sol’ut-eh lays a heavy hand on my shoulder and gives me a soft smile. “Far from it. You’ve been through too much in a very short time.”
I sniff, forcing a smile. “Hey, privacy, remember?”
She chuckles and taps my shoulder twice before turning to prepare the meat for dinner.
I stand alone for a moment, fists clenched because I don’t want to be here anymore. I just want to find Miriam and bring her home. I couldn’t save my wife... Tears start pooling in my eyes again and I quickly wipe them.
A pressure wave grows within my chest, coursing through every muscle and bone softly, easily, like a purring kitty saying hello. The wave swirls within, gently urging me to let it out. It’s the same force I felt before I wiped out an entire village.
Never again.
I take deep breaths and center my thoughts. Miriam, think of Miriam.
Slowly, tenderly, the power goes back to sleep, but I fear it’ll destroy everything around me when it wakes up again.
26
-James-
Tonight, I wake with Miriam watching me.
“Can you feel it?” she whispers, her eyes darting to the sky, then the rocks and the trees around us. “It’s in the air, everywhere, specks of dust, differently arranged. That’s all we are.”
The tree crowns, and the blurry night sky above, peer through Miriam’s jellyfish skin. She’s almost completely transparent. “Mir, is that really you?”
She keeps admiring the forest in silence.
I sit up and pull her into my arms, pressing all the parts that are still her against me. She’s almost as light as the air, and her skin feels like a soft membrane.
“You and me, we’re much more than specks of dust,” I say.
She shakes her head. “Everything is, James.”
Not sure how to make sense of that.
When I glance down, I see her spine beneath her fading shoulders. Air freezes within my lungs. I have to pretend everything is fine, soothe her into coming back.
I kiss her forehead and try not to stammer as I say, “Stay with me. I miss you.”
Miriam relaxes in my arms, her weight increasing as the peach color of her skin swirls on her shoulders. The brown of her hair dances through her transparent tresses.
It’s working!
She feels heavier by the second. She’s coming back!
“I wish you could come with me,” she whispers.
I press her harder against my chest. “I can’t be like you, Mir.”
“I can’t be like me either.” She frees from my grasp and gives me a soft peck on the lips before bursting into trillions of sparks that glimmer against the sky, filling it with brand new stars for a quick moment.
Space dust.
I wake with a scream stuck in my throat.
***
This morning, Chuck sits by my side on a curved, fallen branch. He hands me a large piece of smoked bug meat. “You must eat.”
The dream replays nonstop in my mind. Was Miriam real or just a figure of my imagination? I had her in my arms…
“I’m not hungry.” My voice comes out as a broken string.
“Eat. You’ll need your strength today.” A grave command, Chuck’s specialty.
I want to tell Chuck that I’m not goddamn hungry and that he should leave me alone, but there’s a warning in his stare, something unyielding and powerful behind his irises, promising that if I refuse, he’ll cram the food down my throat.
I grab the bug meat from his hand and take a bite.
Zed soon approaches and sits by my side. Sol’ut-eh must’ve gone to the “restroom,” since she’s nowhere to be seen. Her whisar physiology is like a clock, every day at the same time.
Zed discretely nudges my left rib with his elbow as if he’s trying to tell me something, which is stupid because he can speak in my mind, but whatever. Zed nods to Chuck, and when he sees I’m still lost, he rolls his eyes.
“Chuck,” Zed says slowly, as if he’s still getting used to the name. “I assume you had a reason for picking me up as your contact back at the moon base?”
Chuck doesn’t flinch before saying, “Indeed. You were too eager to please.”
Ouch. He should’ve said Zed was a remarkable youngling with a perfect track record, just throw the guy a bone, especially considering Zed worships the ground Chuck walks on.
But that’s not really how Chuck works, is it?
Instead of silencing after this clap back, Zed pushes. “Naturally. A researcher with a vast military training such as yours is unheard of, which makes you quite an interesting acquaintance.” He bites a piece of his bug meat before continuing. “Even I, who went through the hardships of star flyer training, cannot compare to you.”
Chuck frowns as if he’s trying to decide whether to call Zed boy or girl. He goes for neither. “Star flyer training is equal to human summer camps. Besides, how could you compare to me, youngling?” He chortles. “You’re a child.”
I hold a smirk, because Chuck’s technically a twelve-year-old calling a grown woman a child. That’s the thing with vessels, they’re rarely what they seem to be.
Zed grimaces, his perky nose crinkling a little. “Of course, I hadn’t meant it in that manner, I deeply apologize.” He clears his throat. “However, I did beat your stealth flying record by 2.3 jeheks.”
Chuck’s eyes widen with genuine surprise. “Do not lie.”
“I never do, unless it’s absolutely necessary.”
Chuck squeezes his eyes at Zed, and I think he’s reading his mind. Eventually, he nods to himself and says, “Quite good, youngling.”
Zed’s shoulders slump and his gaze lowers to the ground. I guess he expected more than a simple “quite good.”
Oh! I see it now. Zed’s trying to show off to Chuck because he wants to be his disciple. I did promise him I’d put in a good word…
“You know, Zed’s looking for a mentor,” I say with my best casual tone.
“He asked me to be his mentor a few months ago.” Chuck avoids Zed’s gaze. “I told him then, and I’ll tell him now: Miriam was my last. He should apply for Monta’hers-na’s program on human diplomacy. It’s a growing field, one which will benefit him greatly.”
Zed’s lips press into a line and he lowers his head, but I’m not giving up that easily. “If it weren’t for Zed, I’d never be here.”
“You say that as if it’s something to his advantage.” The glare he shoots Zed is all spikes and thorns. “He should’ve never freed you.”
“I-I was mere
ly trying to help,” Zed stammers, fumbling with his fingers.
Sometimes Chuck can be such an ass.
“Look, after you became an exile, Zed turned off the base’s scanners to help you bring a ship to your mansion, didn’t he?”
Chuck gives one small nod.
“So technically, Zed could blackmail you into taking him as a disciple, right?”
“I could never blackmail Ah’rbal, I mean, Chuck,” Zed says with a quiet tone. “It’s not honorable.”
“Damn it, Zed, let me do the talking.” I sigh and rub the bridge of my nose. “Chuck, Zed jeopardized a lot to bring me here.” I turn to Zed and lay a hand over his shoulder. “He’s my friend.”
Zed’s eyes widen and he shoots me a grateful smile. “I never had a friend before.”
“Whisars don’t have friends,” Chuck grumbles, hunched over his shoulders, his legs tapping the ground nervously. He glares at me before turning to Zed. “Zed’phir-lack, if someone finds out an exile has taken you as a disciple, we will both get the death sentence.”
Fireworks explode beneath Zed’s irises and he nods in the way of an eager child, which is super odd, because he’s a grown woman. “I understand the risks. I will take an official mentor, but you’ll be the one to teach me the most valuable lessons.” He puts a hand over his full chest and bows his head.
“The youngling’s dark safe is slightly open,” Chuck says before turning to me. “You have a knack for teaching whisars to feel, James. It’s a dangerous skill to have.”
I raise an eyebrow and flash him a jaunty grin. “Like a superpower?”
“If this ends badly, it’ll be your fault,” he growls beneath his breath before standing up. “Are you finished?”
Swallowing my last piece of meat, I nod.
Chuck starts walking into the forest surrounding the glade, and motions for me to follow. Zed begins to accompany us, but Chuck says, “James only.”
I shrug a silent apology to Zed and follow Chuck.
We walk into the jungle, following paths drawn by giant tree roots that resemble wooden tentacles, swirling atop one another. The dense tree crowns above block the sunlight, drenching the forest into an eternal penumbra.
“Before we were captured, my guiding pad showed faint signs of quantum energy emanating from a cave near the mountain’s peak,” Chuck says as we walk up a thick root.
“Quantum energy? That’s the thing that fuels your ships, right?”
“It also fuels our phasers, which is something Werhn-za’har is likely carrying around.” He stops and looks up to the tree crowns. “Thanks to your blast, my pad doesn’t work, so I need you to lift me above the foliage. I’m good with directions, but I must be sure of our positioning toward the cave.”
“Hell no.”
If I drop Chuck, he’ll fall from a height that’s at least half of the Empire State Building. He might be a whisar living legend, but he’s still inside a human body.
“James—”
I step back. “I can’t risk your life. You’re family, I…” My breathing shortens. “I can’t, all right?”
He approaches and grabs my hand in an encouraging way that reminds me of my father. “We don’t have another option.”
“You have some telekinesis, why don’t you use it?”
He shakes his head. “It’ll be too draining. I might go up, but coming down will be an issue.”
I give him a soft chortle. “It’s still a safer option than asking me to do it.”
“There’s no safer option here, boy. Only the best we can do.”
Once again, Chuck is willing to risk his life to help me and Miriam. I can’t find the words to thank him. If lifting Chuck miles above is part of his plan to save my wife, then I need to make it work. No, I will make it work.
Air fills my lungs, then rushes out. Once. Twice.
“Okay.” I swallow dry.
“Good.” He taps my arm. “You may begin. Time is against us.”
27
-James-
My invisible hand gently wraps around Chuck as if he were an injured bird. He shows no resistance against the force. He’s letting me take over.
The power reverberates through every muscle and bone in my body as I push Chuck upwards. He rises slowly, carefully, until he disappears beyond the tree crowns. Sweat blooms on my forehead and my fisted hands shake. This is equal to holding a horse with my bare arms for hours. I could break at any moment.
I won’t, I tell myself.
It’s so strange, even if I can’t see Chuck, I can still feel him inside my head. His shape echoes like a sonar, allowing me to sense the beating of his heart, the wind that ruffles his shoulder length hair, and the smile that sprouts on his face.
“Excellent,” he says in my mind. “We’re in the right spot. Now lower me, boy.”
I take a deep breath while my entire body shakes. Keeping Chuck safe has taken a huge toll, my head hurts, everything hurts. I begin lowering him, fully aware that it would only take one small distraction to turn Chuck into a tangle of flesh and broken bones crashed against the forest floor.
Almost there. Three... two… he lands safely across from me.
I bend over and hurl the bug meat I ate half an hour ago.
“Oh, please,” Chuck says, a roll of eyes embedded in his voice. “Even a whisar ten dratas younger than Zed’phir-lack could’ve done this.”
“Thanks,” I grunt as I wipe my lips with my sleeve.
“Your nerves are getting in your way,” he says with a shrug. “Be confident in your skills.”
“Sorry if I was too scared I’d drop and kill you,” I retort, my breathing still more erratic than I’d like. “Also, you might not have noticed, but I’ve been telekinetic for less than a freaking week.”
He clicks his tongue. “Don’t be so sensitive, boy.”
I could punch him in his Peter Pan face. Instead, I ask, “What’s next?”
Chuck places both hands on his hips and looks up. “First, you’ll have to float all of us to the tree crowns. We can rest atop the leaves, I bet they can take our weight.”
I chortle. “I can’t lift all of us up there.”
“Yes, you can.” Another simple fact. “This way, we’ll be able to see the landing spot.”
“Landing spot?”
He opens a mischievous grin and his eyes sparkle. “You’ll slingshot us to the cave where Werhn-za’har is.”
A gasp comes out, then a bunch of nervous chuckles. “Y-you’re joking.”
His serious stare tells me he isn’t.
Something cold and sharp cuts through me. “Chuck, I’ll kill us all.”
“Probably. Which is why you need to practice first.”
A low growl rumbles from beyond a wall of blue vines in the distance. The air is thick around me, all kinds of bells wailing in my head. “What was that?”
“A test subject.” Chuck claps his hands together, looking overly pleased with himself.
“What?” I shout, right before the creature shuffles through the vine curtain, prowling over a thick tree root.
It’s a mix between a hairless sabre-tooth and a monkey, with sharp massive canines, a flat ape-like nose, and four-fingered hands instead of paws. But the worst thing is its size. Even from this distance, I figure that the beast must be as big as a double-decker bus.
It prowls slowly toward us, its yellow, lidless eyes shining with predatory menace.
“If you can slingshot the beast toward the mountain against its will,” Chuck whispers, that eager grin of his never leaving his face, “you’ll have no problem doing so with four willing subjects.”
“You’ve lost your mind,” I croak as my legs threaten to buckle.
The creature jolts toward us and the root shakes with its weight. On instinct, I press the air around the beast, squeezing it with my invisible hand, but the creature bellows something between a lion’s roar and a wolf’s howl, and fear shatters the grip I had on it into a million pieces.
It didn’t even slow down.
Panic crashes upon me like a giant boulder. That pressure wave of power swirls in my gut, ravenous, hungry, and I’m not sure how much longer I can hold it. “Chuck, I can’t do this!”
“You can,” he says nonchalantly, leaning against a thick, long-stemmed wooden vine to his left. “Control your nerves and command your mind to do what you want.” He sneers. “It’s your mind after all.”
“As if that’s super fucking easy!”
The beast jumps, its shadow drenching us in darkness.
No time.
The power escapes my stomach and spreads across my skin. My arms tingle and the hairs at the nape of my neck rise as the power spreads through the air surrounding us, thrumming and dancing. This strange, invisible power waltzing through and around me feels… wonderful. Brutal and gentle at the same time.
Chuck’s words replay in my head: Be confident.
The power boosts from the tips of my fingers like a jet of spider webs, wrapping the animal in an invisible cocoon right before it lands—and kills—us both.
The creature stops mid-air, squirming and writhing. The strikes it takes at the power that traps it are nothing but little tickles in the back of my brain.
“I did it!” I shout. This is as easy as holding a kitty.
Chuck taps my arm with the strength of a grown man. “Well done, boy!”
“I didn’t think I could…” I let out a relieved smile.
Chuck steps forward and turns, standing before me as the beast hovers above us. “This power that you have, it’s not common to whisars, or anyone else in the galaxy.” He shuffles on his feet. “It took me centuries to master something similar to it, and yet, here you are, doing wonders in only four days. That’s nothing short of remarkable,” he says with a certain sense of pride.
I smirk. “Gee, Chuck, no need to get all emotional.”
He rolls his eyes before stepping closer and tapping my belly. “Right now, you’re feeling a surge of power all through your body, but it’s centered here, in your stomach.” He glances up as if he’s waiting for me to confirm, so I nod. “You’re using this power to hold the beast, but you can also use it to expand your perception of the space around you.”
